Hope you had a good day.
Emilia
I’m pleased to get an immediate response but for some reason I feel anxious to read it.
__________
From: Logan Prescott
Subject: Today
Date: Sunday, November 4, 2012 4:40pm
To: Emilia King
Emilia,
I’m happy to hear it went well. I’m even happier to hear that you managed to finish on your own two feet, especially since I wasn’t there to carry you.
I planned on coming to watch but something came up that I had to deal with.
My day began great since I spent the morning with you.
I can’t say the same about the afternoon.
Logan
I stare at the screen and re-read his email before typing out a response. I wonder what “came up”? Maybe something with his family, maybe something school-related? I decide to shrug it off.
__________
From: Emilia King
Subject: Today
Date: Sunday, November 4, 2012 4:45pm
To: Logan Prescott
Logan,
I’m sorry your day didn’t go as planned.
Can I help you with whatever came up?
My morning was lovely too despite you giving me redundant grief over a tedious subject.
Emilia
__________
From: Logan Prescott
Subject: Tedious subject
Date: Sunday, November 4, 2012 4:49pm
To: Emilia King
Emilia,
I wouldn’t give you “redundant grief over a tedious subject” if you did what you were supposed to do when we first discussed it.
I held up my part of the deal now do you think you could possibly extend me the same courtesy?
Thank you for your offer, but it’s probably best if I handle it on my own.
Logan
__________
From: Emilia King
Subject: Didn’t mean to ruffle your feathers
Date: Sunday, November 4, 2012 4:48pm
To: Logan Prescott
Logan,
My intention was not to irritate you about this morning but clearly I have by the tone of your email.
If you need my help, you know where to find me.
I need to get to work on an essay so I must go.
Hope your evening is better than your afternoon,
Emilia
__________
From: Logan Prescott
Subject: As long as it’s your feather duster
Date: Sunday, November 4, 2012 4:50pm
To: Emilia King
Emilia,
It has been a long day and will more than likely be a long week. I look forward to seeing and persuading you soon.
Good night, beautiful.
Logan
I roll back on my bed and stare up at the ceiling. Feeling overwhelmingly anxious, I wonder what’s going on with Logan. Why doesn’t he want my help? What could it be that he needs to handle on his own? And, why does he think his long day will turn into a long week?
Closing my eyes, I try to block out my distressed thoughts. I need to start my research on my next essay. I roll back over on my stomach and grab the book on my next essay topic for my American Literature class, “The Scarlet Letter” by Nathaniel Hawthorne.
My eyes are starting to feel heavy from all the reading and writing when Bryn suddenly bounds in my room and flops down next to me on the bed.
She props herself up on her elbow and gazes at me, reminding me of Logan. I close my eyes, attempting to shut the image out. The things that I have no control over are often the things that cut me the deepest. I know if I start thinking about Logan, my mind will only get the best of me. Yes, I overanalyze things but this time it’s hard not to when I have no idea what’s going on with him. Simply, I will only get myself more worked up over-worrying and this is never a good thing.
“You tired?” Bryn picks up my book and adds, “Ah. No wonder, The Scarlet Letter would put me to sleep too. Can’t you just watch the movie?”
I giggle. Thank God for Bryn. She cheers me up even when she doesn’t realize that I could use a laugh.
“It’s a classic, Bryn. I think I’m just tired from the meet. By the way, thank you for coming today. It meant a lot to me.” I smile, sincerely at her.
“Wouldn’t have missed it.” She pauses for a second and then adds, “Where was Mr. Big Bucks?”
I really don’t want to get into it with Bryn.
I shrug. “He had something he needed to do.”
“Busy buying you a plane ticket to New York?” She teases. “Did you change your mind and accept his offer I hope? You’ve never been to New York. You should go. Plus, it’s an all-expense paid vaca! How can you resist?”
I roll my eyes at her. “Yes, that’s all I care about.”
“It’s not a big deal. Life’s too short, Emilia. Go and have some fun, trust me.”
“Bryn, what happened to me taking it one day at a time. Incidentally, I did take your advice last night.” I flush.
“Oh?” She looks at me, inquisitively.
“I told him about what happened, not everything, but the basics.”
“You okay? I know how hard that must have been for you, but I do think for you two to work you had to tell him, right? I hope I didn’t make you do something you didn’t want to do.”
“You know I would never do something I didn’t feel comfortable doing…or saying, for that matter. And, actually, I was surprised to find that it felt really good to get it off my chest. It was like a weight had been lifted. Does that make sense?”
“Of course, it makes total sense. How was he when you told him?”
“He was really sweet.” I say, tears welling up in my eyes. But my tears are more from my immediate anxieties not from the night’s revelations. Fortunately, Bryn doesn’t suspect anything and I’m relieved.
She leans over and gently strokes my back. “Oh, Emilia. I hope Logan makes you happy. I know it’s all new and scary but honestly that’s how it is with any relationship.”
She pauses for a minute. “And so help me if he does anything to hurt you…he will have to deal with me.”
I don’t know why but I find myself grinning at Bryn. Maybe it’s because she’s so beautiful and sweet but she can also be so fiercely protective and tough.
“You think I’m funny?” She smiles back at me.
“It’s just hard to picture you ‘dealing with him.’ You’d kick his ass for me?” I smile at her.
“Yes and then some.” She says and then we burst into a fit of laughter.
26
“NO!” I SCREAM OUT. It’s dark and I run but I’m not getting anywhere. My muscles in my legs can’t move. Someone is holding me down and no matter how hard I try I can’t break away from the tight grip. I scream but no one comes so I shout louder and louder until I feel someone shaking me.
“Emilia. You’re having a bad dream.” Bryn sounds urgent, fearful.
I blink open my eyes and see Bryn sitting on my bed beside me. She’s staring at me with an expression full of worry and concern.
When I realize I was a having just another night terror, I let out a deep breath and rub my tired eyes.
“You okay?” Bryn asks with concern in her voice.
“Sorry, I woke you. I’m fine.” I’m still groggy with sleep.
“You sure? Can I get you something?”
“No, thanks. Go back to bed.”
Bryn stands to leave and then turns before she heads out the door. “Please come get me if you want to talk or whatever. Okay?”
“Yes. Thanks, Bryn.” I manage a slight smile.
When she leaves my bedroom, I turn on the small lamp on my nightstand. I figure I might as well read because I probably won’t fall back asleep anytime soon.
The rest of the week follows the same pattern. I can’t sleep. I’ve never been much of a sleeper but this we
ek is one of the worst. Sleeping with Logan on and off the last month or so improved my sleeping habits immensely. But this week is a nightmare. No pun intended.
It’s Thursday night and I’m beyond exhausted. But even now, I only dose off sporadically, always waking drenched in sweat and screaming.
I haven’t heard from Logan since Sunday and my anxiety over his last couple emails has just exacerbated my disturbing sleep habits.
I always run in my dreams but it’s not like when I run in real life. It’s the only time I’m not fast. In fact, I can’t move at all. I run and it’s away from something but I can’t see what it is…it’s just something dark. I run and run but I just can’t get away.
“No!” I scream out. But no one hears me. I shout it again, louder, “No!”
“Emilia!” Bryn is shaking me again. She’s sitting beside me on my bed.
I blink open my eyes and stare at her.
“Jeez, Emilia. Are you okay?” She asks, woefully.
I nod. “I’m so sorry, Bryn. I’ve woken you every night this week.”
“I’m sorry you’re having these nightmares. These are worse than usual, right?”
“They haven’t been this bad in a while.” I yawn and rub my eyes.
“I can’t even remember the last time you’ve shouted out like this…it’s been a long time.” She lies down beside me on my bed.
“Maybe you should stay at Josh’s tomorrow so you can get a good night’s sleep.”
“I usually don’t get much sleep when I stay with him.” She giggles.
“Good point. Well, I’m fine now. Sorry I woke you again. Why don’t you try and fall back asleep?”
“You kicking me out?” She teases.
“No, but seriously I feel horrible that I keep waking you.”
“Emilia, is there something that’s bothering you?” She asks as she props herself up on her elbow and stares down at me.
“Not really.” I shrug.
“Sounds like you’re not telling me something.” She yawns.
“I don’t know. I guess it’s just everything with Logan.”
I pause and then continue, “I’m probably just feeling overwhelmed and maybe because I told him about what happened…maybe it’s all just eating at me and causing my nightmares to be worse than usual. I don’t know.” I intentionally leave out my worries over Logan and whatever came up for him.
“That makes sense.” She falls back on the pillow and looks up at the ceiling.
The bright, morning light slowly consumes my room.
“TGIF.” Bryn murmurs. “We are definitely going out tonight. I may even have to have a margarita or two.”
“I thought you swore off tequila.” I say, turning to look at her.
“Well, that was just for that one week. I’m ready to get back on the tequila wagon.” She giggles and then adds. “We need to celebrate.”
“Celebrate? What are we celebrating?” I smile at her. I can always count on her to lift my spirits.
“It’s Friday and it was a long week…need I say more?” She grins.
“Sounds like a good enough reason to me.”
“Besides you need to clear your mind…a little drinking and dancing is just what the doctor ordered.”
I giggle.
WHEN I RETURN TO OUR HOUSE after my last class, Bryn is already in full cocktail mode. Thankfully, I have the day off at Spyder because she has other plans for me. I still haven’t heard from Logan and it’s taking every ounce of me to not dwell on it. I’ve almost called him and emailed him so many times but I’ve somehow refrained. I have no idea what’s going on with him. Have I scared him away with my past?
I’ve read and re-read his last email countless times. I can’t imagine his week was as long as mine. He wrote that he looked forward to seeing me and persuading me soon but it’s now Friday. My heart is heavy, but I need to put on a brave face.
Besides waking up Bryn every night this week, she’s also always so supportive.
Maybe she’s right. A little celebration might be just what I need to clear my head.
When she turns to see me she is grinning from ear to ear. She hands me not one drink, but two. I look at her, confused.
“Start with this…take two of these and call me in the morning.” She giggles.
“I think I like your medicine, doctor.” I smile and take the two glasses from her.
Grabbing a glass for herself she turns back to me.
“To tequila-based medications.” She grins. “To the end of a long week and to an evening of debauchery and fun.”
We clink our glasses and sip.
“I don’t know about the debauchery part for me.” I say, wistfully.
“No word from Logan?” She says and takes another drink.
“Nope.”
“I know you don’t want to talk about him but I know for a fact he’s seriously into you. But if he’s going to get all weird about commitment or what you’ve told him, you’re better off without him.”
“I suppose.” I murmur, not wanting to think or talk about it.
“You have them lining up for you, Emilia.” She pauses. “It’s that simple. If he’s not making you happy, you need to dump his ass.” She says matter-of-factly.
I giggle at her. “Thanks, Bryn. But you know he really hasn’t done anything wrong.” I take my last sip of margarita and start to drink my second glass.
“Well, always good to be prepared and it’s better to have the upper hand. Trust me. If Josh pulls any sort of crap on me, I will not hesitate to kick him to the curb.”
“Thanks for the advice. I don’t know…it sounded like this week was going to be busy for him. Maybe he’ll call later.” I shrug and take another sip.
“I’m sure you’re right. Now, go get ready so we head out to Tonic for some dancing.”
When I head back down the stairs after I shower and dry my hair, Bryn is already in the kitchen waiting for me. She’s dressed in tight jeans, a fitted black halter neck top, and her black Louboutin shoes that she wore for Halloween.
“Bryn, you look hot.” I smile up at her. She towers over me in her high heels especially since I’m wearing half-inch wedges. “Or should I call you Posh?” I say, and wave my hand towards her heels.
She giggles. “Josh likes them.”
“You mean Becks?” I giggle as I finish my second margarita.
“How about one more before we go?” She says as she quickly refills my glass.
“Do I have a choice?” I smile at her.
“No.” She pauses. “Incidentally, you are looking pretty hot yourself.”
I’m not looking nearly as glamorous as Bryn but I’m in my favorite jeans and a slate-colored open shoulder top. My hair is piled-up high in a somewhat chic updo with my bangs softly brushing my eyes.
“Is Josh meeting us?” I ask, even though I already can guess the answer.
She nods since she’s mid-sip. “Some of his friends too. I’m sure Tyler will be there.” She smiles, knowingly at me.
“Bryn, stop. Don’t even go there.” I say as I take another sip. I’m on my third drink and I know I will need to slow down or stop entirely if I don’t want to be completely wasted by the end of the night. But Bryn is all for partying. And frankly, the idea of some drinks and forgetting my worries sounds like the best plan of action.
“I know. I’m just teasing you.” She says as she finishes the rest of her drink. “Knock it back, girlfriend.”
I finish the rest of my margarita and hold up my empty glass towards her. “How’s that?” I smile at her.
“I like that you are following your doctor’s orders.” Bryn giggles. “Now I order you to go and party like a rock star.”
Putting my arm around Bryn, I say, “Only if I can be Pink.” I giggle.
“You can be whoever you want as long as you have fun.” She smiles as we head out the door.
Tonic is in full swing when we walk in the club. It’s loud with the music bouncing off th
e black walls. The dance floor at the center of the club is packed with college students, happily unwinding at the end of the week. I can’t imagine anyone feels more relieved that this week is over than me. Well, maybe Bryn since I woke her every night.
“Hi ladies.” Josh shouts as he wraps his arm around Bryn and kisses her passionately on the lips.
Tyler is beside him and we both look awkwardly at each other while the two of them are all over each other.
“Can I get you a drink?” Tyler leans and whispers in my ear.
“Sure. Thanks.” I shout above the music.
Josh and Bryn are just coming up for air when Tyler is turning towards the bar to order drinks.
We move towards the side of the bar where it’s less crowded to enjoy our drinks. Bryn and I are now downing our fourth margarita, while the guys drink beer.
Tyler waves the cocktail waitress over who is carrying a tray of shots.
“What do you have?” He shouts to the blonde, leggy server.
“Jager!” She shouts, an abbreviation of a potent alcohol called Jagermeister.
“We’ll have four.” Josh hands her his money and grabs four shots. We each take one of the shots, clink our glasses together and down the cough syrupy black liquorish-tasting liqueur.
“Wow, that stuff is strong.” I shout.
At that moment a few things simultaneously happen. Tyler puts his arm around me, my head spins and I can feel my phone, which is in my back pocket, vibrate.
Bryn laughs. “Another round of jager!”
I shake my head at Bryn. She leans forward and whispers, “Just one more.” She slurs, slightly. “It’s just what you need to feel better.” She giggles.
“My doctor is trying to get me hammered.” I giggle.
The shot server is back and we all take another round of shots. As I take mine, I intentionally grab onto Bryn, trying to free myself from Tyler’s grasp.
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