So much fell into place, now – the headaches when he’d tried to probe his own mind too deeply, the way he’d been quite comfortable around Madison’s extraordinary talent, his illogical certainty that everything was as it should be, when it was quite patently not so, his awareness of a strange core of detachment, even in the middle of a personal nightmare. They’d planned and planted it all. It was a textbook performance. One for the journals. And Madison had been … amazing.
And now he was in love with her. He shifted his arm, leaning against the window frame, staring out without seeing. His mind turned relentlessly in on itself – returning in an endless circle to that sickening moment when he awoke and realised who he was, and what he’d done. He’d known immediately, with stunning certainty, that he’d never been in love before, but that he was now. The leap of joy his heart gave lasted barely a second, before the horrific implications of what he remembered wiped it away.
Jay came painfully back to awareness of his surroundings. Madison was retracing her steps along the beach. He turned away from the window. For a moment he stood, undecided. One last attempt to convince her to run, and not look back? Oh, yeah, like that’s going to work.
The sigh came up all the way from his boots. Madison was right. The only way now was forward. Which meant he had to protect her, in every way he knew.
He headed for the phone.
The way up to the cottage was steep. In parts steps had been cut into the rock, to ease the ascent. The bushes on either side were still heavy with water drops. Madison took her time, avoiding a soaking and husbanding her breath. The view, as she stopped at one of the tiny natural terraces in the cliff, was a meld of grey on grey. Sea and sky meeting and stretching on forever. Until they fell off the end of the world.
She hadn’t reached any new decisions. She hadn’t really expected to. All she could do was feel her way. Guard up, as always. Ever since her parents had died in a hail of bullets. Since before that. She pushed the idea out of her head. Not a thought to harbour around Jayston Creed.
The man who said he loved her.
There was a jeep parked beside her car. She walked around it and let herself in quietly, through the kitchen, hanging up her jacket and shaking out her hair. In the mirror, on the wall beside the sink, she discovered a surprisingly normal reflection. The redness of her eyes had faded and her cheeks were rosy from the sting of the wind. She stepped into the hall. There was a low murmur of male voices behind the door of the living room. She couldn’t distinguish the words. She put her hand on the door and pushed.
Jay was standing beside the fireplace, every line of his body tense. His head came up when he saw her. Had he hoped that she’d change her mind, that she wouldn’t come back?
The second man was sitting on the sofa, with his back to her. All she could make out was the top of a sleek, blond head. Not Alec Carver. He was dark. Unless he, too, had a body double.
As she walked into the room the man rose from his seat, and turned.
If she’d tumbled into the rabbit hole, she hadn’t stopped falling yet.
Jay stepped forward.
‘Madison, this is—’
‘I know who it is,’ she forestalled him. Part of her mind was impressed how cool her voice was. ‘Hello, Craig.’
Jay’s face, she decided, was well worth seeing. Total incomprehension. Not that she was much better, but she wasn’t going to let it show.
‘You’ve already met?’ Jay’s voice sounded rusty.
‘You could say that,’ Madison nodded. ‘Craig was meant to be the best man at my wedding. He was Neil’s closest friend.’
Chapter Twenty-Seven
‘Hello, Maddie.’ Craig spoke for the first time. He offered his hand. After a second’s delay Madison took it, then leaned in to peck his cheek for good measure. Her nerves were tightening like wires, but she was damned if she was going to reveal it. Jay looked as if he’d swallowed a bag of nails. Craig was the only one, of the three of them, who appeared in any way relaxed. But then, he’d known what was coming.
He was watching her, eyelids slightly narrowed. Probably realised what she was thinking, even without mind-reading skills. ‘You’re looking well,’ he said blandly when she dropped his hand and stepped back.
‘And you,’ Madison responded automatically. Polite chitchat, when her mind was screaming what the hell are you doing here?
Which was nothing to what was going on in Jay’s head, if his eyes were any indicator.
‘Shall we sit down?’ Craig indicated the sofa. Madison, finding her knees were suddenly not up to the job, collapsed into it. Craig took the chair. Jay, after a brief hesitation, propped himself against the arm of the sofa. Madison took a moment to admire the territorial manoeuvring.
‘I called Craig—’ Jay began, and then stopped.
Madison’s knees might be unreliable, but her brain had gone into overdrive. ‘The Security Service, the ones you’re working with. Craig’s your what? … Handler?’ And he’d been close, close enough to get here in an hour.
‘That’s quite a jump,’ Craig said evenly.
‘Assuming that someone I thought was a corporate accountant is really some sort of high-class government agent?’
Craig bowed ironically at the compliment of high-class. Memories clouded Madison for an instant. His sense of humour had always been one of the things she’d liked about him.
‘Believe me,’ she continued, ‘around here it’s no jump at all. Unicorns, dragons, flying pigs. Bring them on.’
Craig shrugged, aiming a mildly sheepish grin at Madison. She averted her eyes, unwilling to be drawn back into old alliances. If things go to plan, you will double cross this old friend. She shifted uneasily, before her resolve stiffened. Craig’s masters would take everything they wanted from Jay and from her, if they could, without scruple. In the name of national security. She sat up straighter.
Jay’s hand drifted in, to settle on her shoulder. Analysing the warmth and the grip, she decided it could stay there. ‘How far have you got?’ She flashed a glance between the men.
‘Not much further than hello. I’ve only just arrived,’ Craig offered.
‘Not enough time to explain that he already knew you.’ Jay shot the other man a pointed look. ‘Which has never previously been mentioned, if my recollection is accurate.’
Craig shrugged again, unconcerned. ‘Need-to-know basis.’
Madison felt the tension in Jay ratcheting up a few notches.
Time to get back on-message. ‘You want to tell us what should happen next? I assume you’ve worked something out?’ She looked up, directing her question at Jay.
‘Only an outline, of the more obvious parts.’ He looked from Madison to Craig. Craig nodded that he should go on. Jay cleared his throat, speaking slowly. ‘This isn’t exactly a full-scale plan. Just as far as I’ve got. The way I see it, we return to London tomorrow, as if everything is normal. Once there, we restage the breakthrough, for the Organisation’s benefit. I’m assuming your office and lab will have been bugged over the weekend.’ He looked over at Craig. Craig nodded again. Jay took a visible breath, before continuing, ‘Alec will be in charge of picking us up. Craig’s people will be in place to make sure nothing goes wrong.’
Madison suppressed an inappropriate impulse to laugh, that might have its roots in hysteria. The capacity for something to go wrong – well, it was a lot higher than for it to go right.
‘Fine,’ she said, channelling calm.
Craig was frowning. ‘You’re comfortable, going along with this?’
‘Perfectly.’ Liar. She gave her best impersonation of relaxing against the sofa. ‘There are a couple of things I would like to know from you, though, before I finally commit.’ Jay’s hand jumped on her shoulder. She ignored it. She fixed her eyes on Craig. He was looking uneasy now.
‘You can tell me the truth.’ She breathed deep. Part of her didn’t want to do this. A larger part understood that she had to. The question that had been growing in her mind was too big. She tilted her head, to look directly into Craig’s face. There was no easy way. She just had to say it. ‘Was Neil working with you? Did he love me, or was I just a job? Was I about to marry a real spook?’
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Craig’s expression said it all. Madison’s vision misted, then refocused. In the back of her mind a hundred loose ends began to knit together.
‘He loved you. Don’t doubt that.’ Craig’s voice rasped. There were lines of tension around his mouth. Jay’s hand dropped from her shoulder. She couldn’t look at him. Her focus was totally on the other man. She thought about sending in a probe. Only if it’s necessary.
Craig’s head jerked, as if he’d heard her. She knew he hadn’t, but the awareness of what she was had to have crossed his mind. One to you.
Craig cleared his throat. He raised his hand, but let it fall again in an unfinished gesture. ‘At the start, you were an assignment. Get close and observe. Then Neil fell for you.’
‘But why?’ Madison put her hand to her head. Apprehension squirmed in her stomach. ‘Why were you interested in me?’
‘Come on, Maddie, you’re not that naive.’ Craig moved impatiently. ‘The unit I’m attached to—’ He jerked his head at Jay. ‘Ask him. Officially we don’t exist, in practice we keep track of those with unusual … gifts. Why do you think you were headhunted from that pharmaceutical job? It was to put you somewhere where we knew you’d be safe. Neil was part of that.’
Madison processed that, heart floundering. Everything she thought she’d achieved in her life, everything she’d prided herself on – her independence, her professional competence, her ability to take care of herself. Craig had just handed her a plate full of ashes. People she didn’t know existed had been manipulating reality to keep her cocooned – out of harm’s way – and she’d never even suspected it. Even the man she’d agreed to marry.
‘I was just a job.’ Her voice was barely a whisper. ‘Neil … in the end he couldn’t face the wedding.’ Ice crawled over her chest. ‘He jumped off that bridge because he couldn’t bring himself to marry me.’
‘No!’ Craig came up, almost out of his seat. Madison saw the indecision in his eyes. Confusion swarmed through her. What wasn’t he telling her? She was poised to leap into him, to get the real truth, when she saw him make up his mind. Instinctively she braced her shoulders.
‘Neil didn’t jump off that bridge, Maddie.’ Craig’s voice was rough and urgent. ‘He loved you. He wanted to protect you. He would never have left you like that. Neil didn’t commit suicide because of you, or the wedding. Neil was murdered.’
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Madison rocked back with shock. Automatically she jerked her knees up under her chin, wrapping her arms around them, folding in to protect herself. Jay slid down on to the sofa and gathered her close, holding her against his chest.
‘Are you sure of that?’ he barked out the question.
Craig nodded grimly. ‘The whole thing was carefully staged. Neil wasn’t suffering from depression, or on medication. The way it was put together was clever enough to satisfy the police but there was evidence, if you knew what to look for. Not least the fact that he’d never have done that to you.’
Craig looked straight at Madison. She could see him weighing up how much more he could share with her. She pulled herself up, out of Jay’s protective embrace.
‘You’ve started now. You may as well tell me the rest.’ She curled away from Jay, so that she was sitting upright. He let her go. She trailed her fingertips over his, in acknowledgement, but her attention was all on Craig. ‘Who would want to murder Neil, and why?’
‘The Organisation.’ It was Jay who answered. Madison heard the hollow edge of horror in his voice. She put her hand over her mouth.
Craig nodded again. He’d given up any attempt at dissembling. Madison found herself wondering, with a small detached part of her mind, how deep in trouble he was getting by talking to her like this. Or had that been calculated, too? Did he have permission to divulge if necessary? How would she ever know? She’d never seen his face look so bleak.
‘We—’ Craig began, then stopped, clearly unsure how to go on. Madison waited, not offering him any help. In the end he sighed. ‘We think Neil was killed in order to expose you. There were two other women on the original shortlist for Creed’s experiment, one in Finland, the other in Japan. The woman in Japan lost her husband in a hit and run, the other’s partner died of unexpected complications after routine surgery. We didn’t put it together until it was too late. The Organisation was paving the way.’
Jay swore, soft but vehement.
Madison’s eyes were swimming. Emotional overload. She forced her nails into her palm. She didn’t want to let the tears fall. ‘It’s nearly two years since Neil died.’ She turned to Jay. ‘When did you start planning this?’
‘Ten months ago.’
She shut her eyes. ‘That is … horrible … grotesque.’
‘The Organisation’s roots are long, and they dig deep. They have no boundaries.’ Craig’s voice was hard. ‘They’ve been planning this a lot longer than anyone else. They always wanted that experiment.’
Fury came out of nowhere, clean and bright, scouring out the pain. Madison felt the vestiges of her tears dry, burned away in a red glare. She clutched the rage and held tight. ‘Well, they’re not bloody well going to get it!’
After they’d thrashed out a plan, in as much detail as was possible, Madison walked with Craig to the jeep.
‘Maddie.’ He put his hand on her arm. ‘Are you really okay with this? When I found out you were the one the Organisation had chosen—’ His craggy face crumpled. ‘You don’t have to go through with it. I can get you away. The whole purpose of my unit is to stop people like you falling into the wrong hands. Creed and I can cobble something together—’
‘And get yourselves killed in the process?’ She saw the knowledge in his eyes, though he was never going to admit it. Somehow it made her stronger. ‘I’ve said I’ll do it. So I will. There’s something else now – I have to … for Neil. If I don’t … then he died for nothing.’
They stood in silence for a moment. Craig spoke first. ‘Uh – are you and Creed?’ He jerked his head towards the cottage.
Madison nodded. ‘He says he loves me.’
She looked down at her feet. There were traces of sand on her trainers, from her walk on the beach. That seemed like a century ago. In half an hour, in half a second, the whole foundation of a world could change.
‘He kind of reminds me of Neil. You trust him?’
Madison shrugged. Not water she wanted to swim in with Craig.
He slid his hand under her chin, lifting her face up. ‘You don’t have to be guilty about Neil, Maddie. He was where he was because he was doing his job and because he loved you. He was a professional, one of the best, but he must have slipped up. They should never have got to him. He intended to resign, once you were married, and hand the surveillance over to someone else. I guess he let his guard down too soon.’
Another thing that only took a second.
‘But if it hadn’t been for me—’
‘Done is done,’ Craig cut her off. ‘You attract strong men, Maddie. They can take care of themselves, Creed included. He put himself through a lot to get here. He wants to take the Organisation down.’
‘He spent three months on the streets.’ The question had been haunting her. ‘You were monitoring him all that time? Why did it take so long? A week or two would have been enough.’
‘Ah.’ Craig looked away. ‘That was plan A, but then your return from Washington was del
ayed. He was already out there. Everything was on hold until you came back.’
‘Freak!’ Madison let the outside door slam behind her. The noise reverberated through the cottage. Crockery danced on the old-fashioned dresser.
‘Madison?’ Alarmed, Jay came into the kitchen at a run.
‘I’m a freak. A jinx. Everyone who touches me …’ She raised her hands, warding him off. ‘Three people around me have been murdered. You were on the streets for three months, just to get my attention. Anything could have happened. Those kids could have kicked your head in. You could have contracted TB, died of pneumonia—’
‘Madison.’ Jay caught her hands and reeled her in. ‘None of that happened. And none of the other stuff is your fault.’
‘Neil died because of me – because I have something corrupt inside my brain, something evil. I’ve tried so hard to stay away from hurting people – but everyone who’s ever been close to me has been hurt. If that doesn’t make me a freak, what does?’
‘If you’re a freak, I’m one, too.’ He had her close to his chest now, hands on her back, desperate to calm her. She was shaking in his arms, in a way that frightened him. ‘I’m sorry, Madison, I had no idea about Craig and Neil.’
‘Why would you?’ The tension eased abruptly from her limbs. She sagged against him, as if she was suddenly too exhausted to stand. He lifted her off her feet and carried her through to the next room, putting her down on the thick rug in front of the fire. She sat shivering. He took her left hand, rubbing it between his own. The right hand was at her throat.
Out of Sight Out of Mind (Choc Lit) Page 23