Surrendered

by LP Lovell

  “I swear to god dude, if you hadn’t spotted her first…” Hugo smirks.

  “Hugo, there is not enough money in the world that could make me get within ten feet of what is in your pants.” She points at the offending area. God, when will she learn that this shit is like foreplay to him? There is nothing she can say that will offend him. The more vile names they call him, the more he likes it. He’s a sick fucker.

  He grabs his crotch, through his very thin boxers. “Everyone wants a ride on my trouser snake. Rambo’s a wild stallion.” He wiggles his eyebrows.

  “I’m surprised it hasn’t dropped off.” She mumbles.

  “Fuck, so am I.” He replies with a shrug.

  I decide to steer the conversation away from Hugo’s cock. “Dude, were you just reading a girl magazine?” I grin.

  He shrugs. “Some chick left it here. Did you know there’s a sex position of the week in there?”

  “Actually, yes.” I grin, cocking an eyebrow at Lilly. She rolls her eyes again. “Speaking of girls…where are they all?” He looks away from me, his usual cocky bravado dampened.

  “Uh, I didn’t party this weekend.” He says as though it’s totally normal, which it is for most people, not Hugo.

  “I’m sorry? No girls?” He shakes his head. “No drinking?” Another shake. “No sex?” My voice rises. He shrugs. “Fuck dude, are you okay?” This is genuine cause for concern. I can’t remember the last time Hugo went without sex for more than twenty four hours.

  “Cut him a break babe. He’s allowed a weekend off.” Lilly chips in.

  “Sugar, this is Hugo. No sex. For nearly three days…”

  “Um, okay, this is clearly one of those guy talks, so I’m going to take Gary for a walk.” She says.

  “His lead’s by the door.” Hugo points in the direction of the hallway. “But he doesn’t like exercise.”

  “Come on Gary.” She beckons the dog toward the door, panting and grunting with every step. The door clicks shut behind them.

  I turn to Hugo, who looks…well, sober, and not himself. “Seriously dude, what has you acting like a pussy bitch?”

  He snorts. “Says you. Fucking hanging out with your missus on a Sunday. Very domestic.”

  I blow out a breath. “Actually, she just dragged me to see Cassie.”

  His eyebrows shoot up. “No shit.” He frowns. “Wait, she dragged you?” I nod. “Fuck. That girl’s like some kind of fucking saint…” His lips twitch. “In a really prickly skin.”

  Can’t disagree with that. “Yup, pretty much. So, what’s going on with you? I’m not going to drag it out of you, so just fucking tell me.”

  He sighs heavily and says nothing for a few minutes. Eventually he says one word. “Molly.” He mumbles.

  I shake my head. “Could have fucking told you that was going to go south.” He sits up and rests his elbows on his knee’s, holding his head in his hands. I’ve never seen him so serious.

  He lifts his head and nods. “I know. It was fucking stupid. She’s not one of those girls.”

  “No.” I shrug. “But dude, you’re not one of those guys. She knew that all too well before she decided to go there. She always knew she was going to get fucked and chucked. Jesus, I don’t know anyone who is more open about their sexual activities than you. I’ve fucking witnessed it enough times.”

  He smiles. “True.”

  “So, why are you being all fucking weird? I never thought I’d say it, but I think I prefer you when you’re an arsehole.”

  He takes a deep breath, his eyes focused across the room. “I was a fucking cunt to her.” He turns to face me. “I deliberately fucked someone in front of her.”

  I collapse back against the sofa cushions. “I heard. That’s rough. Why?”

  He shakes his head. “She fucking came over here on Wednesday, and she said she likes me.” I wait for him to say more but he doesn’t.

  “That’s it?”

  He glares at me. “Molly likes me…Fuck dude, she needs some nice guy to…I don’t know, do whatever it is nice guys do…”

  “So, you made her realise what an arsehole you are?”

  He shrugs. “Now she knows.”

  “None of this really explains why you care…” I’m a bit puzzled by this whole thing. He says nothing, and realisation suddenly dawns on me. “Oh shit, I knew you were into her, but I thought it was just her pussy…damn.” She must have a pussy of gold. I’ve seen ten grand a night hookers who have never had Hugo in this kind of funk. It has to be the sex, because with Hugo, sex is all there is. I would never tell him this, but he’s a full blown sex addict. He doesn’t feel, hell, I’m not sure he can feel. But then, wasn’t I the same before I met Lilly? I’ve never been as bad as him. I mean, I used to fuck lots of women, but Hugo is literally just chasing an orgasm all the time. It’s almost frantic. He treats it just like a drug. Once he’s had one orgasm, he’s chasing the next, and just like a high, he always wants to go one better.

  This has led him into an endless cycle of fucking anything, in the hopes of achieving a better high than the last. Molly seems to give him something. I don’t know what it is, but she seems to be a cure for his endless need. He keeps going back to her, like a junkie going to his dealer…he’s addicted to her. He must care about her though, or he wouldn’t have gone to the effort of pushing her away. I’ve never seen Hugo like this. Shit just got a whole lot more complicated for him. I know how that feels. It can fuck with your head.

  Hugo will never be good enough for Molly though. I love him, and I want him to be happy, but he’s a fuck up, like me. I love Lilly, but she’s not exactly straight forward. We fix each other. Molly doesn’t need fixing, and she doesn’t need Hugo, especially after the stunt he pulled. She’ll be running for the hills.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  LILLY

  Gary is without doubt the most unruly dog I have ever met. I had to all but pick him up and carry him to the park. He is not fucking light! You’d think I was trying to bloody kill him. That is until he gets a sniff of a female. I have never been so embarrassed. Some poor woman’s handbag dog, became an unwilling victim. I guess it’s very fitting that Hugo should have a lazy, rapist dog.

  “I am so sorry.” I say as I haul him away from the traumatised looking creature. The woman scoops the dog up and leaves without a word. He promptly lays down and refuses to move again. “Seriously dog?!” A pleasant dog walk, I thought. Yeah, right.

  By the time I get him back to the flat I’m exhausted. Carrying what must be thirty kilo’s of dog will do that. Theo and Hugo both flash me curious glances when I come in and collapse onto the sofa across from them.

  Hugo laughs. “Told you he doesn’t like exercise.”

  I snort. “Until he sees a girl.”

  “Oh yeah, then he’s a lad. He’s a player, aren’t you, Gaz.” The dog collapses on the floor by his feet, panting and slobbering everywhere. Jesus, you’d think he’d run a marathon.

  “Um, I don’t think there were much skills required. It was a fairly simple case of body weight ratio. Poor dog got raped.” Hugo just shrugs.

  “On that disturbing note, we need to go.” Theo stands up, an amused grin on his face. I stand, and he reaches for me, pulling me into his side. “Babe, you don’t smell great.” He angles his face away from me.

  “Because I had to carry that fat bastard up here.” I point at Gary accusingly. He’s on his back again, exposing his enormous testicles to the world. It must just be a theme with the male of every species, to flash their kit about.

  “He is a pedigree breeding animal.” Hugo says haughtily.

  “Yeah, sure. Looks like it.” As if to prove my point, Gary farts. “Lets go. I don’t think he’s cute anymore.”

  I turn tail, Theo following behind me, as Hugo roars with laughter.

  Theo has promised me a proper date tonight. I’ve never been the sort of girl who wants dates and flowers. Honestly, I’ve always found that shit a little vomit inducing. I do
n’t want the romantic bullshit, I just want normality for a moment. I want to pretend for one night that we’re just a normal couple. Well, not normal, but not crazy.

  His only stipulation is that we go to his favourite Chinese restaurant, Hutong, which is located on the thirty-second floor of The Shard. The reason he has stipulated this is because it’s very public, and will host some of London’s upper circle. Basically, he wants us to be seen together, and he wants the word to get out. When I said that I wanted us to keep our relationship quiet, I used Harry as an excuse. It’s true that Theo being associated with me, meant that the press would almost definitely get wind of Harry’s case. If I’m not with Theo, then I’m of no interest to them, and neither is Harry. It’s Theo they’re after, not us. Now that Harry is free and clear, he wants to shout it from the roof tops. In a way I guess I’m flattered. He wants to stake a very public claim. I’m dubious though. I hate the press. I hate that they hold so much power over our lives. Theo’s used to it. He says that he would rather they speculate about us than post lies about which other women he may be sleeping with. I don’t care though. They know nothing about us. Why can’t it stay that way?

  “Ready?” Theo’s deep voice breaks me out of my thoughts. I glance up into the mirror in front of me, meeting his eyes in the reflection. He flashes me a blinding smile. “You look hot, babe.”

  I smile and turn around, pressing my chest to his. His eyes devour me like a man starved. “Thank you.”

  He bites his lip, his fingers tracing a feather light trail along the edge of my dress, skating across the top of my breast. I smile at him seductively. All I have to do is wear the right dress and he’s putty. This is one of those dresses which is understated but sexy in it’s simplicity. It’s black, with a v-neck line and thin straps. The skirt is tight to the knee, hugging me in all the right places. I think I’m finally back to the weight I was before the heartbreak drama. I bought this dress to celebrate. It appears he likes it.

  I check my watch. “I thought you had dinner reservations.” I smirk. He grunts a response, his eyes fixed on my chest. Boys! “Theo!” I snap my fingers in front of his face.

  His eyes meet mine, a mischievous glint in his deep blue irises. “I do, but you can’t wear that.”

  I put my hand on my hip and tilt my head to the side, daring him to repeat himself. “I can, and I will. Do you know what I paid for this dress?”

  He groans. “I’ll pay you for it, trust me, it’s well worth it. Just not when I have to sit opposite you in public, and attempt to hide the monster boner I already have.” He cocks an eyebrow at me.

  I smile. “Tough shit. Deal with it.” I scoop up my clutch bag and manoeuvre around him to exit the bathroom.

  He groans. “Lilly!” He follows me into the bedroom.

  I turn to face him. “You are a grown man, Theo, not a sixteen year old boy.”

  “I might as fucking well be around you.” He grumbles.

  I laugh, and step up to place a slow, but teasing kiss on his lips. His hands sneak around my waist and grip my arse. I’m all for animal instinct, but I’m thinking that there may be something to be said for delayed gratification. Theo is all animal. That man has no control. I wrap my fingers around his wrists, pulling his hands away, as my tongue swipes quickly across his bottom lip.

  I turn on my heal. “We’ll be late for dinner.” I say, glancing over his shoulder. His eyes are fixed on my arse, and he’s biting down on his clenched fist, a look of absolute desperation on his face. Power has to be exercised in order for it to remain. Think of this as me exercising my power, reminding him of where he stands. No matter how good looking he is, no matter how much money he has, and no matter how many times he makes me scream his name, I. Own. Him.

  “Thank you.” I say to the waiter as he expertly fills my wine glass. He nods his head and scurries away. I take a sip of my wine, glancing out over the city. The view from The Shard is amazing. I’ve been up here before of course, but never at night time. It’s a great place to meet clients. It has the wow factor, and when someone might pay you tens if not hundreds of thousands of pounds, you need to make sure they are wowed.

  At night time, London looks so beautiful, like thousands of stars scattered across the darkness. I turn away from the view to find Theo’s heated eyes studying me, still sulking. Luckily he’s seated opposite me, otherwise I have no doubt where his hands would be right now.

  I can feel the eyes watching us, the whispers of Theo’s name. I might even catch the flash of a camera out of the corner of my eye. Theo takes my hand across the table. “Just focus on me, sugar. We’re just two people having dinner.” He flashes me his most charming smile. “I’m an excellent dinner companion.”

  “You don’t do dates, so that’s bollocks.” I cock an eyebrow at him.

  He laughs. “True.” He puts his palms flat on the table, leaning in toward me slightly. “But, am I not the best looking dinner companion you’ve ever had?” He smirks.

  I shrug. “Personally I think Molly is prettier, but…”

  “But, you wouldn’t fuck Molly, so…” His lips quirk.

  “We were talking dinner, not fucking. You assume way too much.” I sip my wine, which is some seriously good shit.

  The waiter interrupts to bring us our starters. I don’t really know what I ordered, only that it’s chicken. I stab a chunk of meat with my fork and place it in my mouth. It’s so good, sweet and spicy.

  I have to say this isn’t exactly like the all you can eat Chinese that George likes to visit. The food is amazing, although, coming from a girl who lives on coffee, vodka and Haribo, that’s probably not much of a compliment.

  “I want to take you away.” Theo says.

  I take another sip of my wine. “Where do you want to take me?” I ask slowly.

  He shrugs. “Where do you want to go?” He counters.

  I narrow my eyes at him. “Somewhere hot, with pretty beaches.” I joke.

  “I have a house in Cape Verde.”

  I narrow my eyes at him. “I remember you telling me. You said you would take me there, and I told you it was unlikely.”

  “If I remember rightly, we were sat in a supply cupboard, and you were trying to have inappropriate sex with me at the time.” He says with a cocky lilt to his lips.

  I snort. “Hardly.”

  “Anyway, I want to take you there. You’ll like it.”

  “I have no more time off to take at work…” He starts to interrupt. “And you are not pretending to need me on some business bullshit.” I roll my eyes. The only time I have remaining this year is the week I have booked off next month. The week that Molly and I are going away for our holiday. I don’t know why, but I suddenly feel bad that I’m going with her and not him. She’s my best friend for fucks sake. Ho’s before bro’s or whatever it is.

  “Why not?” I hate lying to my boss, I just feel so seedy. It’s not as if they don’t all know that I’m sleeping with Theo. I know Simmons turns a blind eye, because he’s getting paid for my time. That also makes me feel like a hooker. Ugh, why couldn’t I have just been one of those people without a conscience? Most people would snap his hand off at the chance of a paid trip to Cape Verde.

  I sigh. “Because I feel like a fraud.”

  His eyebrows pull together, a small line forming between his eyes. “What do you mean?”

  I glance up at him, locking eyes with him. “I’m worried that Simmons only keeps me because of you.”

  He laughs. “No babe, he doesn’t.”

  “How do you know?”

  He shakes his head. “I just do. You are really good at your job, sugar. I’ve seen solicitors twice your age who aren’t as clued in as you are.” He reaches over and brushes his thumb over my knuckles. “Have a little faith in yourself. Stop expecting everything to be taken away from you at any minute. You can stop running, and stop fighting. This is it, sugar.” Fuck, how does he see through me so completely? He takes my hand and places a kiss on my knuckles, lock
ing me in those beautiful blue eyes. “We can live the life we want…and that includes you coming to Cape Verde with me, to see our house.”

  “Your house.” I smile, rolling my eyes. I pick up my wine glass with my free hand and take a sip.

  He shakes his head. “Nope, our house. Your name is on the deed.” I cough, choking on the wine. Fuck! He hands me a napkin.

  When I’ve finally got myself together I manage to gasp. “What?!”

  “Don’t freak out, it’s not a big deal.” He shrugs.

  “Theo, you bought that house when we weren’t together.”

  He smiles. “I always knew you would come back to me, Lilly.”

  “How?” I breathe. How can anyone have that much faith in another person? It’s crazy, impossible, surely? Not to mention, that person is me. Crazy, defensive, surrounded by six foot tall razor wire topped walls, me.

  “You and I are meant to be. You belong with me. Your brand of crazy keeps me on my toes.” He grins. How can he have seen all this so clearly, and yet I couldn’t? I just kept fighting him, determined to stand alone in my own private war. Theo makes me feel weak, but he fortifies me with his strength. He is my vulnerability, just as he is my greatest asset.

  I smile. “I love you.”

  “I love you too.” He says with a shit eating grin on his face. Some things never change. “And, on that note…I have a question for you.” He eyes me seriously.

  “O-kay.” I say slowly.

  “Move in with me.” Well firstly, that wasn’t a question, it was a demand, and secondly, oh my god.

  “Um…” I stumble over my words.

  He rolls his eyes and leans back in his chair casually, a small smile fixed on his lips. “Let’s not do that thing where you think of every reason why you shouldn’t, whilst I counter them all, and eventually I win anyway.”

  “There are very valid reasons why I shouldn’t…” I start.

  His smile widens. “None of them valid enough. I love you, and that’s all the validation I need.” He waits while I chew nervously on my bottom lip. Okay, this is a huge step. Like massive. But…it’s Theo. If I’m not sure of him by now, then I’ll never be sure of anyone. Fuck it, in for a penny and all that…