“It’s your Charger outside, isn’t it?”
“Sure is,” I reply. “If you’re a good boy, I’ll let you take it for a ride. Now, listen to what your mother has to say.”
“Wolf one, Bianci zero,” Riggs cheers.
Ignoring him, I turn to Maria.
“You and me, Lady,” I murmur against her ear, squeezing her knee.
I watch her swallow before straightening shoulders and sweeping her gaze around at the four faces that mean everything to her. With undeniable courage, she reveals to her children that she has breast cancer. I try to keep my focus on her but it’s hard when so many hearts are breaking around me. My eyes move to Lauren and I watch the tears roll down her cheeks as she shakes her head in disbelief.
Next, I turn to her son and as much as I hate to admit it, it’s him that tears at my own heart. Pushing his fingers through his hair, he stares at his mother with tears in his eyes. For so long he’s been the man in her life protecting her and now there is finally something he can’t battle with his fists. He’s just as powerless as the rest of us and it’s killing him.
Even her in-laws look distraught over the news.
As much as I want to take them all into my arms and assure them their mother is going to be fine, I don’t. Instead, I bring Maria closer to me and dry her eyes as I stare across the room at her son.
I’ve got her.
She won’t be alone.
You can trust me.
“The surgery is scheduled four weeks from today,” Maria says, reaching for the box of tissues on the coffee table.
“What happens after that?” Lauren questions through her tears.
“Recovery will last about four weeks, they’ll remove the drains and start the radiation,” I tell them.
“Do you know how long the surgery is?” Adrianna asks.
“The doctor said it’s normally two-three hours, but she’s going to start the reconstruction, so it may be longer,” I say, trying to remember everything.
“What do you mean reconstruction?” Lauren questions.
“They’re going to take a flap of tissue from another part of the body, most likely my stomach and put it in place of my breasts. After the radiation is complete, then I’ll meet with the plastic surgeon in regard to implants.”
“How long is radiation?” Anthony asks.
“Five days a week for six weeks,” I answer.
“Well, we’ll all pitch in and take you,” Riggs says.
“No,” Maria replies, shaking her head. “I don’t want to inconvenience any of you. You both have families and my grandbabies come first.”
“Ma, don’t even start with that shit,” Anthony growls. “You’re our mother. If you think for one second, we’re not going to be here for you when you need us, then you don’t know how well you raised us.”
“Anthony’s right,” Lauren declares. “Whatever you need, we’re here.”
Maria’s body shudders with a silent sob and she bows her head.
“I’m going to be fine,” she whispers through her tears.
“Yeah, you are,” Riggs says. “You’re the toughest broad I know.”
“Riggs,” Lauren mutters.
“What? She is,” he defends. Turning to Maria, he pulls his sunglasses from his face and stares her in the eyes. “I mean it, Mama Leone. Cancer ain’t got a thing on you,” he says, pounding his fist to his chest.
As eccentric as he is, there are times when he gives you a glimpse of his heart and right there, he wore his on his sleeve.
“Wolf?” Lauren calls.
“Yeah, sweetheart,” I answer, giving her my attention.
“Thank you for taking care of our mother.”
Been thanked for a lot of things in my life and never did someone’s gratitude mean as much to me as the blue-eyed girl sitting across from me.
“No thanks required,” I say hoarsely.
“So, does this mean the cat is out of the bag?” Riggs questions, pointing a finger between me and Maria. “You two are a thing?”
Maria and I look at one another and I give her a wink.
“You and me, Lady,” I remind her.
Leather and silk.
Meeting somewhere in the middle.
“Yes,” she answers, turning to Riggs. “If that’s what you’re calling it these days, then, yes, we’re a thing,” she confirms, lifting our joined hands. “Al’s been very supportive since I told him,” she adds, glancing at her son. “I don’t know if I could’ve handled today without him.”
Anthony looks at me and I motion towards the front door.
“Why don’t you and I step outside for a moment?”
“That’s not necessary,” Maria argues.
“I think it is, Lady,” I say, keeping my eyes on Anthony.
Placing his hands on his knees, he pushes himself off the loveseat and nods in agreement. With a reassuring kiss to her forehead, I follow his lead and we make our way outside. As I pull the door closed behind me, I watch Anthony cross his arms against his chest and stare at me.
“For God’s sake, Wolf, my mother?” he grinds out.
“Yeah,” I reply. “Your mother. Look, I know what she means to you…what she means to all of you. I think you know me well enough to know when I give my word, I give my soul. I’m not going to hurt your mother, Anthony. I know her worth and I know what she deserves, and I promise you, I’ll take care of her.”
“She doesn’t like when people take care of her,” he snaps.
“Well, she doesn’t have to like it. She has to accept it and once she does she’ll get used to it. She’ll realize she’s not alone.”
“Because she, has you?”
“Because she has all of us.”
Biting the inside of his cheek, he looks away and contemplates my words.
“Whether you like it or not, I’m not going anywhere.”
“Why her? Why now?” he questions, giving me his eyes.
“Why not?”
“I’ll kill you if you hurt her.”
“I wouldn’t expect anything less but that’s not going to happen.”
He doesn’t argue and in exchange, I offer him my hand. He remains silent as he stares at the peace offering between us. A moment later he gives me one of the firmest handshakes I’ve ever received and my respect for him grows tenfold.
“Make her happy,” he says. “No one deserves it more.”
“I’ll do my best,” I assure him. “But I need something from you too.”
“What’s that?”
“I need you to let the paramedic go,” I tell him, dropping his hand. “Without Jack knowing.”
His eyes narrow and he steps closer to me.
“What kind of game are you playing?”
“This has nothing to do with your mother,” I say. “Jack’s going to kill that girl and I can’t let that happen.”
“If I let her go she’s going to run to the cops and then what happens? What happens to Jack? What happens to you?”
“I don’t know,” I admit. “What I do know is that your mother needs me and that has to come before the club. You release the girl and I’ll make sure Pipe gets a handle on Parrish. Everything after that is on Blackie and Pipe. You and me, we’ve got one priority, and that’s seeing your mother through the fight of her life. You got me?”
“Yeah,” he says reluctantly. “I got you.”
I got you too, kid.
Chapter Twenty-six
In the first week that followed my diagnosis, I made every attempt to keep things as normal as possible. The thing was, normal for me was a lonely world and I suddenly wasn’t alone anymore. When I wasn’t working at the bowling alley, I was spending time with my kids and Al, making memories and well, simply living.
The day Nico was released from the hospital, Al and I cooked dinner at his house. His three boys came over and we told them we were together. We also told them about the cancer and explained my course of treatment to them. Like my own childre
n, they were eager to lend a helping hand. Nico offered to move back into his old room and take care of the house should Al decide he wanted to spend more of his nights at my house. Enzo, bless him, suggested we go bra shopping after my implant surgery. Apparently, he wasn’t an ass man like his dad. The youngest, Frankie, was more reserved but equally supportive in his own way. By the end of the night, I found myself planning another family dinner with all of our children.
Al called us the ‘Brady Bunch’.
I called us perfect.
“What’re you thinking about?” Al asks, winding a lock of my hair around his fingers.
“I’m trying to decide if my dining room table is bigger than yours,” I admit.
“Lady, we just fucked for six hours straight and you’re thinking about furniture?”
Did I mention there’s been a whole lot of that going on too? I swear my body goes on fire the minute he’s near. All he has to do is give me a look or say something dirty and I’m ready to claw him.
I’m not going to lie and tell you, I haven’t wondered what will happen after the mastectomy surgery. Will he still want me as much as he does now? Will I still want him? Will my body shut down or will I crave his touch? I tried googling the answers—big mistake. It’s no wonder people tell you not to do that. By the time I was done searching the web, I diagnosed myself with six terminal illnesses and burst into tears. I thought Al was going to throw the computer out my window. However, as ticked as he was, he showed incredible patience too and had a knack for saying all the right things.
Don’t get me wrong, most of the things that come out of that mouth of his are vulgar, so vulgar they’d make a hooker blush. But that’s him, that’s Al. A little rough around the edges but once you scratch the surface, he’s soft as silk. In fact, I don’t think there is a person on this planet with a heart as big as his.
Running a hand over his abdomen, I press a kiss to his chest before bending my elbow and propping my head on my hand. Staring at him lazily, I grin.
“Was it six hours? I thought it was five.”
“Give me twenty minutes and I’ll make it seven,” he says, squeezing my ass.
Dipping my head, I nuzzle his beard, finding his lips and give him a quick peck.
“I want to have all the kids over for dinner next Sunday—yours and mine.”
“Whatever you want, Lady,” he says, going in for another kiss.
“And, I was thinking, while we’re at it…” My voice trails as I cock my head to the side. “You could invite some of the club too.”
Our relationship has been sort of a whirlwind from the beginning and I feel like everything has been about me. My needs, my wants, and my cancer. If a relationship is going to work, there needs to be a balance. I haven’t even started treatment yet and I know once I do, everything is going to revolve around me. My needs, my sickness, my loss. When will it ever be about him and his needs?
As long as I’ve known him, the club has been such a major part of his life and in the short time we’ve been together he’s barely mentioned it. The men who frequent my daughter’s house and show up unannounced on the regular, are nowhere to be found and the man who once rode every day to survive has traded his Harley for a banged-up Charger.
When he doesn’t respond, I sit up and wrap the sheet around my chest. Leaning my back against the headboard, I study the expression on his face and try to understand him.
“Did I say something wrong?”
“No,” he says, patting my thigh. “Why would you think that?”
“I don’t know,” I shrug. “You never mention the club. I might not have been invited to every party but, I’ve been the babysitter on call for most of them. I know how tight you are with the club and how often you’ve been the one who has entertained them yet, you barely mention your brothers to me.”
Sitting up, he leans against the headboard too and turns his head, giving me his eyes.
“I told you I was taking a break from the club,” he begins. “Initially I was pissed, and I acted out of anger,” he admits. “I thought thirty years of riding entitled me, that I deserved to be treated differently than anyone else,” he says, pausing to shake his head. “When I realized it didn’t, that I bled the same as everyone else, I went to take back my patch and Jack wouldn’t give it back. You see, as crazy as that fuck is, he’s perceptive. He knows when a brother is in need of something and what I needed was time away from the mayhem,” he continues, lifting a hand to my cheek. “I needed time with you…just you. I still do.”
“I guess we all need a break from our lives every once in a while,” I say thoughtfully. “But, don’t you miss it? I feel like I’m keeping you from your life and I don’t want to do that. Just because I’m not necessarily the motorcycle type doesn’t mean I don’t respect that you are.”
“Not the motorcycle type?” he questions with a smirk.
“C’mon, Al, can you honestly picture me on the back of your bike?” I ask him, the tone of my voice laced with skeptical sarcasm.
“I’m going to get you on at least once before the surgery,” he replies.
“Is that so?”
“Yeah, there ain’t no better medicine than riding the wind,” he replies simply. A beat of silence passes between us and he looks away. “I’ve always had a problem merging my personal life with my club life,” he confesses. “Not many people know this, but it took a lot of swaying from Jack for me to even consider becoming a prospect for the club.”
That surprised me. All this time, I assumed he chose the life he leads with conviction.
“Me and him go back a long time,” he begins to explain. “As kids, he and I used to ride our bicycles up and down these streets, looking for trouble or an easy way to turn a buck—whichever came first. Trouble and money went hand in hand for us. We didn’t play stickball or wait for the street lights to go on before we went home to our families and a freshly cooked meal. His mother hated him and mine died before I learned how to wipe my own ass. So, when those lights on the side of the curb came on and all the privileged kids scurried back to their good homes and their picture-perfect families, Jack and I went buck-fucking-wild.”
As he recalls his childhood, I try to picture him a young boy running amuck and for some reason that brings a smile to my face. Maybe because that troubled boy has turned into a fiercely loyal man with morals. Morals, he taught himself.
“It was on these streets, in between felonies and misdemeanors, that we became brothers. A time and place where he had my back and never had to wonder if I had his. Loyalty and respect became our creed long before he owned a Harley or heard of the Satan’s Knights MC. Before he became the deranged Bulldog and me, the patient Wolf who suffers in silence and hunts alone. Way back when we were kids, breaking into homes and tying the owners up so we can steal their jewelry.”
At that, I flinch.
“I took the rap for a home invasion we did together and got my ass sent to juvie—It was the first of what would become many times I sacrificed myself to spare a brother,” he continues. “Anyway, I met Pipe in juvie and when I was released before him, I told him my intentions. I had kept in contact with Jack and knew he was prospecting for the club. Guys like us, we didn’t come out to second chances and clean slates. We got released, and we went back to the streets because that’s the only place we knew how to survive.”
He pauses, turning to me.
“By the time Pipe was released, I had already met Patty. I linked him up with Jack and started to go off on my own. I got a job as a laborer and soon Patty was pregnant with Nico. I married her right away and put every effort into doing the right thing by her and our son. While Pipe and Jack ran around selling their souls to the Devil, I worked as many odd jobs as I could. But doing eighty hours a week on a clock barely kept the lights on. I’d look at Pipe and Jack and they were rolling in the dough.”
“So, to provide a better life for Patty and Nico, you joined the club.”
“It seemed like
the right idea at the time,” he confesses. “Patty couldn’t handle the life and kicked my ass out before Nico could talk. I didn’t blame her though. She didn’t marry an outlaw, she married a blue-collar guy with a rap sheet, someone who promised he’d be better but never fulfilled that promise. The other two knew what they were getting from the beginning, but they thought they’d change me, that their love could fix all the things broken with me. But once a fuck up, always a fuck up.”
Pulling my hand onto his lap, he intertwines our fingers.
“I’m going to take back my patch eventually,” he says. “But I want us to be on solid ground before I do,” he continues. “I told you I learned from my regrets and I wasn’t lying. You come first, Lady, before me, before the club and before my brothers.”
Lifting our joined hands, I do what he’s done so many times and brush my lips over his knuckles.
“I appreciate that Al,” I whisper. “But you should also know, I won’t try to change you. Like you’ve learned from your past, I’ve learned from mine and I know for this to work, we both need to accept we are who we are, and I like who you are. There’s nothing more attractive than a man’s loyalty and you’re the loyal man you are because of your brotherhood. I respect that.”
“Nothing more attractive than loyalty,” he murmurs, rolling on top of me. His hands slide to my hips and he slides me under him, positioning himself between my legs. “You sure about that, Lady?”
“Well,” I say, winding my arms around his neck. “Maybe there are a few things.”
“Like?” he questions, kissing my neck.
“Your mouth.”
“That all?”
“There might be something else,” I murmur, trailing my hands down his back. Finding his ass, I pull him closer and lift my hips. His cock rubs against me and I smile.
There’s that too.
Chapter Twenty-seven
The next morning, I got a call from Bianci telling me that he was going to take care of what we had discussed. I wanted to ask him why he waited so long to do as he was told but he hung up before I got the chance. To be fair, it was better he waited. With everything going on with Maria, I hadn’t had a chance to fill Pipe in on the fact that we were going to let the paramedic go. It wasn’t the ideal solution and risky as fuck but none of us needed another dead body on our hands.
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