by Beth Wiseman
“Nee. Just that he will be staying at Charlotte’s apartment in the city until the end of the month.” Daniel shared Annie’s opinion about that. Why was Charlotte helping the boy, making it easy for him to stay away?
Daed shook his head as he moved past Daniel and went into the house. “And then what?”
“I don’t know.” Daniel stayed outside, rethinking things. His conclusion was that his parents wouldn’t send Annie away, not pregnant with their grandchild. If Jacob came back and quickly married Annie, the bishop may be lenient.
Daniel clenched his fists. He’d always liked Jacob, but right now he was praying for the Lord to help him shed his anger toward the boy. And that Jacob would do the right thing.
Annie got into bed, placed her arms across her belly, and wondered what Jacob’s reaction would be to her being pregnant. They’d gone against what they knew was right by making a baby before they were married, and she’d been praying about that, but she couldn’t help but be excited about becoming a mother. A tiny new life was growing inside her.
Tears filled her eyes as the tree outside her window shimmied against a moonlit night, tiny starbursts dancing on the ceiling above her head. She wondered what Jacob was thinking and finally let the tears come. The man she loved had left her. She was unwed and pregnant. And terrified about what her parents would say and do when they found out. Annie had always known that Jacob was fascinated by the outside world, but she’d thought their love would be enough to make up for it. He’d chosen his own wants and needs over hers. Daniel’s words rang in her head—Jacob’s a coward. She wondered if Jacob would have left if he’d known she was pregnant.
It took Charlotte a week to finish packing. Jacob helped, and in exchange Charlotte kept her promise and showed him around Houston, mostly doing things that didn’t cost much money. They’d worked in the mornings and part of the afternoons, then traveled around sightseeing for two or three hours. The Waterwall Park was only a few miles from Charlotte’s apartment, and Jacob loved watching the sixty-four-foot semicircular fountain that recirculated eleven thousand gallons of water per minute. They’d visited a couple of museums, and on the last day, they knocked off work early and went to Galveston since Jacob had never seen the ocean or been to the beach. For Charlotte the activities had felt like a farewell tour of the only life she’d ever known.
“You know you have to be out of my apartment by the end of the day on March 31, right?” she asked again as they walked to the parking lot of her apartment. “That’s only six days from now.”
“Ya. I know. I’m waiting on phone calls—two places about a job and three about an apartment.”
Charlotte stopped in front of the U-Haul she’d rented and hoped Jacob would have better luck securing an apartment than she did. Credit scores were the determining factor these days of how financially stable you were, and Charlotte’s rating had slipped over the past year. She doubted Jacob had much of a score at all. She’d sold her car just the day before, pawned a few things earlier in the week, and Jacob and the kid down the hall—Benny—had loaded all of her furniture except for the couch. Jacob needed something to sleep on, and Pam and Phillip had offered to buy it after Charlotte explained her plans to them. It would have been a tight squeeze to get it in the moving van anyway. She loved that couch, one of the only things she’d ever really splurged on in her life, but Charlotte needed the cash.
She pointed to Jacob’s pocket where she knew he kept his cell phone. “That phone I had turned on for you doesn’t have a lot of minutes, so keep that in mind. If and when you get a job, you can always add more.” She’d been praying Jacob would change his mind and go to Lancaster County with her, but he hadn’t budged. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him on the cheek, then she looked at the truck again and sighed. “Wish me luck.” She’d never driven anything bigger than a pickup truck, and this baby was massive.
Jacob smiled. “I’ll do better than that. I’ll pray you have a safe trip.”
Charlotte opened the door, threw her purse inside, and climbed into the high seat, trusting that Jacob’s strong faith would guide him and keep him safe.
“Happy Easter in two days.” Jacob barely lifted the corners of his mouth. It was surely the first Easter he’d ever spent alone.
After a final good-bye, Charlotte put the truck in gear and inched forward to start her new life. It was possible to make it to the heart of Amish country by Easter Sunday, but Charlotte didn’t foresee reaching Paradise, Pennsylvania, by then. She planned to take things nice and slow. She’d spent plenty of Easters alone in the past. But sadness wrapped around her as she looked in her rearview mirror at Jacob standing in the parking lot of what used to be her home.
“Godspeed, my friend,” she whispered. “And be safe.” She wasn’t even out of Houston when her phone buzzed, and she knew better than to let her cell phone distract her while she was driving this big rig, so she waited until she was stopped at a red light on the feeder of the freeway before she looked at the text message—from Ryan.
Just checking on you. I hope you’re doing okay.
Charlotte stared at the words for a few moments. Words. That’s all they were. She deleted the text. Then deleted his contact information. And got back on the road.
Five
Daniel still had trouble seeing Edna and John together, but unless he moved to another district, he couldn’t avoid seeing them every other Sunday at worship service and randomly around town. He wanted Edna to be happy, but he still didn’t understand why she’d married John. Daniel had been dating Edna for almost a year when she started to distance herself. But even this morning at Easter worship, Edna didn’t look happy. She didn’t smile much, and she looked tired, or like her eyes were swollen from crying. She’d looked that way earlier when he’d run into them at the hardware store. Daniel was glad to be back home, glad that his chores were done for the day. He was going to take a long nap, something he rarely did.
As he made his way down the hallway upstairs, he heard Annie whimpering from behind her closed bedroom door. He told himself to keep walking. His sister had looked a lot like Edna today with bags under her tired eyes, and Daniel was sure that Annie hadn’t cracked a smile all day. Annie had plenty to be upset about, and a part of Daniel wanted to pound Jacob into the ground. He’d only taken a few steps past Annie’s room when he turned around and tapped lightly on her door.
“Annie?”
“I don’t want to talk, Daniel.”
He rubbed his chin, tempted to go take his nap, but he pushed the door open. Annie was sitting on the bed with a box of tissues next to her and a blanket across her lap. It was chilly inside, and Daniel hoped this was the last of the cold weather before spring. He sat down on the bed beside her.
“I know you’re hurting, mei maedel.” Daniel wasn’t sure whether to pray for Jacob to come back or not. The lad was young, but what Jacob had done was dishonorable. What kind of husband would he be? “Soon you will have to tell Mamm and Daed that you are with child, whether or not Jacob chooses to come back.”
“He’s not coming back,” Annie said through her tears as she reached for another tissue.
“You’ve talked to him?”
“Ya. He called a little while ago.” She covered her face with her hands, sobbing harder.
Daniel waited a few moments, but when he couldn’t find anything good to say about Jacob, he stayed quiet.
Annie uncovered her face and sniffled. “He is happy to be starting a new life, a life that doesn’t include me.” She folded her hands across her stomach. “Or our child.” Daniel stared at her, narrowing his eyebrows. “Did you tell him about the baby?”
“Nee. I’m not going to trap him. I don’t want him coming back just because I’m pregnant.”
“Seems to be a gut enough reason to me, to do the honorable thing.”
Annie started to cry again, so Daniel sat quietly, not wanting to upset her more. Despite the coolness of the room, beads of sweat gathe
red on his forehead. He didn’t like seeing his sister like this, and the more he thought about it, the angrier he became. “Why did Charlotte let him stay in her apartment when she is on her way here?” Daniel still had trouble referring to the Englisch woman as Charlotte since she’d used the name Mary Troyer when she was deceiving everyone last year.
“I’m not sure. The point is . . . he doesn’t want to be with me. If he wasn’t staying at Charlotte’s home in the city, he’d just stay somewhere else.” She sniffled, glancing at her stomach.
“Maybe. But I don’t trust Charlotte. Who knows how she might have influenced his decisions. Maybe you’re better off without Jacob, that scoundrel.”
“Don’t call him that. He’s the man I love, the father of my child.” She covered her face again, weeping. Daniel draped his arm over her shoulder and pulled her closer. But Annie eased away from him when they heard footsteps in the hallway. Heavy footsteps. Daniel couldn’t remember the last time his father had come upstairs for anything. He had a bad knee, so the stairs were troublesome for him.
Annie dabbed at her tears, then scooped up all her used tissues and hid them under the blanket in her lap. “It sounds like Daed, and I don’t want him to see me crying.”
As he glanced at his sister’s swollen, red eyes, Daniel figured it was too late for that, but he didn’t say anything. Someone tapped on the door twice. “Annie?”
“Ya, come in.”
Daed limped over the threshold, his right leg bent slightly at the knee. Stroking his beard, Daed’s eyebrows furrowed. Daniel took a deep breath and held it, wondering if their parents had found out Annie was with child.
“I’m glad you’re here, too, Daniel.” Their father staggered to the rocking chair in the corner and lowered himself into it, keeping his right leg extended, his face tightened with strain. Daniel wondered why he hadn’t just called them downstairs.
“Your mother was not up to talking right now. The Easter festivities have taken a toll on her. But I see that you’ve been crying, Annie, so you must already know what I’m about to say.”
This is it. Annie is going to get shunned. Daniel couldn’t believe it.
“I understand we’re going to have a new life in our family.” Daed sighed, and Daniel quickly looked at Annie. His sister was blinking back tears.
“Daed—” was all Annie was able to choke out before her sobs took over.
“There, there, mei maedel,” their father said as his own eyes watered. “We will all get through this together. It is not the most ideal situation, that’s for sure.” He shook his head. “I’m told that at this age, childbirth can be difficult.”
Annie cried harder. Daed cleared his throat. “But we will do everything we can to make sure your mother has the best doctors to help her through this.”
Daniel stopped breathing. “Mamm is pregnant.” He tried to say the words so it didn’t sound like a question, since their father had already said that a new life was coming into their family. Daed nodded. “She’s fifty-two,” Daniel whispered. He didn’t even know it was possible to get pregnant at that age.
“A baby is a blessing, no matter the circumstances.” Their father latched onto the arms of the rocker and lifted himself out of the chair. “When the Lord sees fit to send us the gift of a child, we must be thankful and obedient.”
Daniel glanced at Annie, who also seemed to be holding her breath.
I hope you still think that when you find out about Annie.
Charlotte stepped out of the cab of the U-Haul and called Buddy to follow. He scurried over the console, then jumped from the seat into the grass. Charlotte breathed in the Lancaster County air while she waited for Buddy to do his business, then trudged through the yard toward the wraparound porch that surrounded the King homestead. She pulled her sweater snug with one hand, carrying her small red suitcase with the other as Buddy hopped along behind her.
With tired legs and a heavy heart, she mastered the steps and knocked on the front door, surprised that no one had come out to greet her. She heard someone clomping down the stairs, and seconds later Hannah opened the door.
Charlotte smelled the wonderful aroma of freshly baked bread just before Hannah jumped into her arms. “I’m so glad you’re here. I’ve missed you!” Hannah gave her a final squeeze, eased away, and glanced over Charlotte’s shoulder, an easy task since Hannah was quite a bit taller than Charlotte. “I can’t believe you drove that big truck all the way here.” Then she leaned down and ran a hand along Buddy’s back. “Welcome to our home, Buddy.”
“I wish I could have made it by yesterday for Easter, but I was exhausted. And Hannah, I tried everything to get Jacob to change his mind. He said if he couldn’t stay at my place, that he would leave, but that he wasn’t going home. And believe me, he is safer at my place than he is walking the streets of Houston, since he hasn’t secured an apartment or a job yet.” She recalled the two hours she’d spent talking to Jacob, trying to convince him to come with her. “He knows he has to be out of my apartment by the end of the month, which is in a few days.” She was wishing Hannah would invite her in so they could discuss it over a slice of buttered bread. “But he’s fine, and at least we know where he is . . . for now.”
Hannah finally stepped aside so Charlotte and Buddy could go inside. It seemed weird to have a fire in the fireplace when it had been so hot in Houston, but it was toasty warm in the living room and a relief from the chill outside.
“We will just continue to pray for our Jacob.” Hannah took Charlotte’s suitcase and carried it to the landing near the stairs. Charlotte warmed her hands by the fire until Hannah motioned for them to take a seat on the couch. Buddy curled up on a rug in front of the fireplace as if he’d lived there forever.
“I thought if maybe he had a few days alone, he’d come to realize that this is where he needs to be. Houston is a busy, loud place, especially where I live. I just can’t imagine he’d be happy there for long. And I brought my television, so I think he is going to be bored.” She looked around. She’d been nervous about facing Amos, but she was disappointed that Lena wasn’t home. “Where are your parents?”
“They send their regrets that they couldn’t be here to greet you, but they went over to the Bylers’ haus to visit with Annie, Daniel, and their parents.” Hannah shook her head. “As if they don’t have enough to deal with, Jacob leaving and all, they just found out that Eve is pregnant. Do you remember Daniel and Annie’s mother, Eve?”
Charlotte nodded. “I was only around the Byler family a few times, but I remember them.”
Hannah pressed her lips into a frown. “Eve is fifty-two,” Hannah whispered, glancing around as if someone might hear.
“Um, yikes. A bit risky at her age.”
Hannah folded her hands in her lap, just as beautiful as she’d always been with her dark hair and striking features. Charlotte had often pictured what Hannah would look like with makeup on, but she didn’t need any.
Charlotte thought about the weeks she’d spent in this house pretending to be Mary Troyer in an effort to find out what happened to her brother, Ethan. She regretted the lies. But she’d found God here, and Hannah and her family. Through her sins, she’d come to know a better way of life. But she didn’t understand why God gave her glimpses of happiness but never anything solid to hold on to. Maybe she hadn’t earned happiness yet.
“I want to hear everything about you and Ryan.” Hannah reached for Charlotte’s hand and squeezed. “But first, I need you to tell me more about Jacob. Mamm is very upset. We all are, but I think she’s taking it the hardest. And I don’t think Annie is doing very well either.”
Charlotte fought a yawn, longing for a piece of buttered bread but not wanting to mention it.
“Jacob said that he loves Annie, but he feels like he doesn’t belong here.” Charlotte paused, not wanting to be hurtful but feeling the need to stay completely truthful. “Hannah . . .” She took a deep breath. “I could be wrong about this, but . . .”
> Hannah stiffened. “What?”
“I just can’t help but wonder if maybe Annie isn’t the one for Jacob. I mean, if he loves her so much, why didn’t he ask her to move with him? I asked Jacob about that, and he said he could never pull Annie from here. But”—Charlotte shrugged—“how could he leave her?”
Hannah stared out the window, then refocused on Charlotte. “I’ve wondered the same thing. We’ve all known that Jacob seemed to need more learning than the rest of us. He was always reading books and talking about things we didn’t understand. But we thought for sure that once he’d asked Annie to marry him, he’d stay.” Hannah shook her head. “Seventeen is so young.”
Too young to make life decisions, but the Amish married young. Charlotte was glad that by the time Hannah married Isaac, Hannah would be almost twenty-six, although that was practically an old maid by Amish standards. Charlotte would be almost twenty-eight by then. Queen of the old maids in Amish terms.
“Jacob has never been alone,” Charlotte said, trying to infuse some hope into her voice. “Maybe after being by himself in my apartment for a while, he’ll realize how wonderful it is here and want to come back. He’ll start to miss y’all and realize that the hustle and bustle of Houston isn’t for him. And maybe realize he’s meant to be with Annie.” She bit back tears, determined not to cry. She’d had plenty of time to think about herself and Ryan during her commute, but she pushed the thoughts away now.
“I had an old cell phone, so I added Jacob to my account, for now. But he doesn’t have many minutes. I didn’t like the idea of him not having a way to communicate with us, and just using apps via the Internet seemed confusing for him.” Please, God, keep him safe.