“Not even just one?” She asked taking a long sip of her beer.
“Well, in my life…one means three and three means five. Therefore, probably not a good idea.” I smiled, happily admitting my problem.
“I’ll cheers to that.” We both laughed and I lifted my water to tap her bottle.
We sat and chatted about school and her job as an elementary school teacher while the boys did a sound check before starting. Once the guitar kicked in, I turned in my seat and listened to them jam. I remained seated for the show, rather than holding my usual spot front and center. I warned Dave earlier that he would be missing one of his best dancers, but to try and not be offended. He was devastated, but understood.
As the show continued, I felt an eerie presence behind me, which was confirmed as the breath of his whisper hit my ear.
“Hey, stranger.” His voice made my stomach turn and my fist tighten. He placed his hand on my shoulder and my body tensed.
I jumped from my seat and turned to warm him. “Don’t fucking touch me.”
“Whoa, Cheyenne, relax.” He leaned in and tried to place his hand on arm.
I swatted his hand away before it could touch me again.
“Relax? Fuck You!”
His hands went up as he slowly backed up, finally taking the hint. As I turned to get back into my seat, I see him step back into someone out of the corner of my eye and I can hear him apologizing to whomever he ran into. He makes no effort to avoid letting me hear his remarks.
“Sorry man, just some typical girl drama. Didn’t mean to bump you. This bitch is crazy and likes games. Good in bed though. Just plays hard to get.”
His tone and arrogance lights me up. Maybe it’s that time of the month, or maybe I was just tired of this asshole all together. I turned back around with my words ready to fly but only got as far as my thoughts, as my mouth popped open and my eyes locked on the man he bumped into. This is going to get ugly real quick.
With Sean’s back to me, he continues his conversation not knowing I am right behind him listening.
“Anyways, what’s your name bro, let me get you a drink. I’m Sean.” He reaches out his hand to Sam who instantly puts the pieces together.
Sam’s eyes darken and he searches mine questioning Sean’s identity. The single tear that falls from my eye is all the answer he needs. His cheeks tense and as if time turned to slow motion, I watch Sam’s fist clench and fly through the air landing a direct hit to Sean’s face. Poor guy didn’t see it coming, not that he didn’t deserve it, but damn. Once he hits the ground, my slow motion film hits fast forward and the chaos begins.
Sam jumps to ground and hits him again, taking his time to make sure each hit lands solid. Out of the corner of my eye I watch as the microphone stand falls to the side and Dave jumps from the two foot stage grabbing onto the back of Sam’s shirt ripping him apart from Sean.
“Enough, dude. He’s out, back off.” Dave yells and Sam tears away from his grip and steps back to look at the scene he created. His last glance is at Dave and another piece of the puzzle falls into place.
“Dave, right?” He scoffs and shakes his head. “Figures. I’m out of here.”
“Sam, wait!” I yell but he doesn’t look back and I turn to Dave with tears in my eyes. “Sorry about all of this. I will explain later, but I need to go.”
“No worries, go. I’ll take care of this.” He waves me off and I head out the door hoping to catch up to Sam.
Running out the front door, I stop and look in every direction. There is no way he got away that fast, where could he be? After another sweep of the area, I finally spot him squatting against the wall in the shadow of the building tucked in the alley. I hustled down the sidewalk hoping he wouldn’t run from me and would let me apologize. As I approached the alley, I could see the tension in his body from the adrenaline that was coursing through him still.
“Sam, are you okay?” He didn’t even acknowledge me. “Please, talk to me.”
He remained quiet for another moment and I switched my weight from left to right, swaying nervously. Lifting his gaze, I could see his expression soften slightly as he looked into my tear filled eyes.
“Please don’t cry. Sorry you had to see that. He won’t be bothering you anymore.” His tone was flat.
“I’m so sorry, for everything. I never meant to hurt you. There is so much you don’t understand.”
“You never mean to, yet you can’t help it. I’ve always been honest with you, why can’t you do the same for me.”
“I am being honest, you have to-“
“Oh, give me a fucking break.” Sam cuts me off and stands straight up as the tension returns to his face and he glares behind me.
“Hey man, I don’t want any trouble. I just wanted to make sure you two were alright.” Dave walked up from behind me and I turned to the side to face both of them.
“I’m fine, and I’m sure you’ll take care of her.” Sam takes off up the sidewalk.
“Man, you don’t get it. There’s nothing going on here. We are just friends.” Dave yells in frustration. Sam throws up a hand and keeps walking away.
Dave turned towards me and smiled. “This is your chance. Go after your man, and tell him how you feel. Don’t hold back, it might be the last chance you get. Fight for what you want, Cheyenne.”
I threw my arms around Dave, “Thanks, I’ll call you soon,” and took off towards Sam.
Finally catching up to him and completely out of breath I stopped a few feet behind him.
“Sam, please. Stop.” I said between breaths wiping the tears from my eyes. He stopped and turned around in his place.
“You have to believe me. Dave is just my friend. Yes, we slept together one time, a long time ago, before you even moved here. The minute I saw you in the bar that night everything changed. I could no longer look at another man without comparing them to you. Which you should know is near impossible, cause no one on earth can compare to you.”
Once it started flowing, all my feelings for Sam came falling out of my mouth while he just stood listening as if he had been waiting for this moment for an eternity.
“This has been the hardest time of my life. I want nothing more than to run away screaming and avoid these feelings that crash my existence, yet the further I run, the more I miss you. Just picturing you with long-leg Louise made me sick.” His eyes softened but his mouth remained straight lined. “I’m serious, Sam. I don’t know why I fight this so much, other than the fact that I don’t want to get hurt. I’m not as strong as I pretend to be. I’m scared shitless of this relationship. Can’t you see that? Don’t you know that I…” Oh my gosh, am I about to say it. Never in my life would I have imagined pouring my soul out on the side of the road about to confess how I really feel. Someone grab the camera, this is a lifetime movie in the making.
“Say it, Cheyenne. Tell me what I want to hear. What I’ve been waiting to hear.”
For years, Sam has wanted me to be his and I have fought it for long enough. All I wanted to do was fight for him and allow myself to fall to pieces in love.
“I love you, Sam.” I finally said it. The three words I vowed to never say.
“Say it again.” The corners of his mouth were beginning to reveal a smile and his eyes were darkening with desire.
“Oh my gosh.” I whisper to myself.
I felt like such a lovesick fool, but I didn’t care. I cupped my hands around my mouth and yelled into the night air. “I fucking love you!” My body was shaking and it felt so good to finally say those damn words.
His smile grew full and he closed the space between us picking me up and wrapping my legs around his waist. Our lips met in a whirlwind of passion as our tongues danced. I could feel his heart beating in my chest and the tears welled in my eyes. Only one man ever made me feel this way, and only one man ever would.
The moment we walked into Sam’s apartment and closed the door behind us, everything became a blur of flying clothes and desperate
kisses, because that is what we are, desperate for each other. Years of built up and denied feelings were rushing out of the both of us. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine myself professing my love for any guy.
Sam was my game changer from the very first day he showed up at my high school.
With my body wrapped around his, Sam made his way to the bedroom, laying us down in the middle of the bed. Breaking our kiss, holding himself above me, he focused his gaze on mine and instinctively I waited to feel nervous and afraid. The feelings never came. I finally realized that the one person I had been running from was the only person I would ever need. My desire for Sam was consuming my entire being, but for once, it felt right. Everything felt right.
“Say it again.” He pleaded breathlessly, never breaking our eye contact. I caught a quick glimpse of doubt mixed with fear before he masked his expression.
He was waiting for me to take it back. Just like me, he was expecting my fear to set in and ruin our moment.
Reaching up, I gently caress his cheek with my fingers, before reassuring him of my feelings. “I love you, Sam Carter. You and only you. I was stupid for so long, and even though I don’t know why you did, I am beyond thankful that you stuck around. I don’t deserve you and I probably never will, but I will spend the rest of my days trying. I know you are afraid that I am going to run, but it is no longer physically possible for me to walk away from you. I love you and I will love you forever.”
I notice the wetness surround his emerald eyes and before I am able to wipe the tear that just fell from his eye, Sam crashes his mouth against mine. I have never experienced a kiss filled with so much passion and…love.
Pulling away again, Sam looks down at me and speaks words that I never dreamed I would crave. “I love you too, Cheyenne. So damn much. I love everything about you.” Pressing his lips to my mouth, he begins kissing and listing the things he loves about me “Your smart-ass mouth.” Nose. “These freckles that you try to hide.” Eyes. “Your honey-brown eyes that are always filled with expression. I can always read your mood just from looking in your eyes.”
“So what do my eyes tell you right now?” I ask, wondering if he is as in tune with me as he assumes.
“Right now, your eyes are filled with heat and want,” he pauses, as if he needs further examination, “but they are also filled with love, and I have to say, this is the best look ever. Now, I wasn’t finished yet, so stop interrupting me.
“Sorry.” I giggle.
Placing a kiss below my ear, Sam continues on his exploration. “I love this spot, because I know how much it effects you.” Above my left breast. “This I probably the one I love the most, because even though you try to act heartless, you have one of the biggest hearts I know. You just need to allow yourself to open it up.” Right breast. “Well this should be self-explanatory seeing as I am a guy, but I also didn’t want to leave it out.” Winking at me, Sam kisses his way down my torso headed to my heat.
I can’t handle the wait any longer. It has been far too long and after the night’s events I am strung tight and only one thing will help.
“Sam,” I gasp out, as he closes in on my sweet spot, “I can’t wait, I need you…now!”
Crawling back up, Sam hovers his body above mine, and all I can focus on is the pressure of him pressing against my entrance.
“Are you still on the pill?”
“Yes, of course.” I started birth control when I was a young teen. Sam and I have never used condoms. Call me reckless.
“Have you…” He lets his question linger, but I know exactly what he is asking.
“Never.” I rush out quickly. “It has only ever been with you.” Sam is the only guy I have ever allowed this with.
Ever so slowly, Sam eases himself inside me and I feel complete. No one has ever compared to Sam.
Balancing his body with his hands, Sam sets the pace with a slow rhythm, keeping eyes locked on mine. Wanting to touch every inch of his smooth skin, I run my hands up and down his arms and back all the way to his perfect ass, pulling him into me harder.
Gliding his hand up my thigh, he grabs me behind the knee, bringing it closer to my chest allowing him deeper access. A moan escapes my lips and I felt the pressure building inside me. Lifting up, I began to meet him thrust for thrust, knowing I was moments away from release.
“Shit, Cheyenne, keep doing that and I am not going to last much longer.”
Ignoring Sam, I keep going causing him to increase the pace. The moment my release hits, my walls tighten around him and after a curse and deep moan his movements still.
The room is quiet, filled only with our deep breathing. I never want to leave this spot right here; with him above, in me, I was completely surrounded by him. I wasted so much time running and now I needed to make up for it.
If I would have lost Sam, I don’t know what I would have done. Allowing my walls to fall, I realize that loving Sam was easy.
“I love you, little red.” Sam says between his soft kisses and I smile at my nickname.
“I love you, too.”
I know we still have much to discuss, but right now, I want to do nothing more than to lay here with the man I love.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Like a lovesick fool; that is how I feel. And to top it off, its even FBO, which blows my mind. I thought my computer would burn to pieces the minute I changed my status. I’m pretty sure Facebook thought I would be single for the rest of my life. People even began to post those funny cat videos on my page. But, all in all, I’m happy and feel a sense of relief. Who knew getting out all your feelings in one night would have such a lifting effect on my spirit. It was one hell of a night, that’s for sure.
Sam is trying to help me adjust to this whole girlfriend thing by taking it slow. He’s constantly asking me how I feel and making sure I am okay with everything. It’s been a little over a week and he still sometimes asks me if I am sure about it all. Of course I’m sure. Yes, I’ll admit it’s the weirdest feeling in the universe to be exclusively dating someone, but it’s also a very natural feeling. Sam is all I think about, and the only man I want in my bed. It’s simple really. He is mine and I am his.
Yikes.
I sound like Sawyer. Speaking of her, she is getting a real kick out of this. She runs around the apartment calling me Mrs. Carter, giggling like a schoolgirl. Ha-ha, jokes on me, but it’s me who will be giggling when she realizes I switched out her body soap with honey.
Thankfully, she behaves in front of Sam and the others. A few days ago we attempted our first double date and had an amazing time. Sam and Preston act like they have known each other their whole lives. It reminds me a lot of Sam and Austin’s relationship from high school. A little bromance is brewing and it makes me smile that Sam is fitting in so well in Avalon. Not that he would have had trouble, the guy is a friendship magnet. I can’t remember one person who met Sam and didn’t like being around him.
The Dave wounds are still pretty fresh, but I am hoping that tonight at Penny’s they can squash all the beef and maybe become friends. They are both amazing men and I think in any other situation would have hit it off instantly. Knucks Road has their final show for the year and will be taking a hiatus for a while. The show starts at it’s usual time tonight, but I asked Dave to meet us there early so we can grab a few drinks before he has to set up.
I haven’t officially asked Sam to come tonight, but hope that he will make the effort for me. There is a knock at the front door and I greet Sam with a sweet kiss to each cheek and a lingering lip lock.
“Nice to see you, too.” He pulls back and smiles.
“Isn’t it always?” I sass back.
“Of course. But I also know that Little Red move means you want something.” He eyes me cautiously but the smile hasn’t faded. He’s in a good mood.
“Really? Is that what you think this smile means?” I ask as I close the door behind him and head into the kitchen and sit on the barstool.
He fol
lows my lead and sits down next to me, not saying anything but giving me the same look.
“Alright, fine. So here’s the gig.” I laugh at my own pun. “Literally. So, Knucks Road is having their last show tonight. They will be taking a break from touring and decided to have their final show at Penny’s. So – “
“So you’re hoping I’ll let you go? Of course, you can go. I trust you Cheyenne.”
“Well, of course you do, you have no reason not too.” Okay well, maybe he might. “I was actually hoping you might want to come with me.” I pause and try to sneak the last part under my breath. “And meet up with Dave for a drink before the show.”
“Really? Nice try. I don’t think that is a good idea.”
“Seriously? Why not? He is such a nice guy and I like I’ve told you a million times, it was never like that. We have always been just friends. I think you will like him. I promise. Please, please, please?” I practically dropped to the floor begging.
So out of character.
“Is it important to you?” he asks.
“Yes, it is. He is one of my good friends and I know that once you give him a chance you will see why.”
His eyes search my face for a moment, and then he lets out a sigh and I feel like I may have actually won this one!
“Okay, on one condition. If I feel uncomfortable or we don’t hit it off, you will let me walk away and not get mad. I will try, but I make no promises. It’s just hard to know that you two slept together and are still friends like nothing ever happened.”
“Trust me, I know it must be weird for you. And I also know that I don’t think I would ever be brave enough or nice enough if the tables were turned. But that’s why I love you. You have a big heart and want to be friends with everyone you meet.” I reach my arms out for a hug, suddenly craving his warm embrace. He is the sweetest, most generous person I have ever met and my heart is so full of love for him.
He hugs me back and lowers his face into my neck, leaving a trail of light kisses making his way to my chest. The tingles have traveled from my chest to my toes causing them to curl up against the carpet. He reaches his hand up to tilt my chin up to look at him in the eyes.
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