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Trust Me!

Page 26

by Paul Collins

flying over people

  you never see.

  Try this – live with

  the other tribe

  without knowing their language,

  their customs, their version

  of courtesy.

  See how well they treat you.

  See how well

  you treat them.

  Leaving Home

  Sherryl Clark

  It's still dark and the birds

  in the gum trees out front

  cheep sleepily as I pass

  my backpack holds

  sandwiches, water and jacket

  chocolate and socks

  I'm ready for running away

  note on the kitchen table

  bedroom door closed

  the day grows light

  the road winds up the hill

  I've got a long way to travel

  when I've found my place

  in a world that wants me

  I'll return. I'll be a boy

  who's learned who he is,

  a boy who's found love,

  a boy who's become real.

  My American Underpants

  Janet Findlay

  Illustrated by Louise Prout

  My American Underpants

  Were made in San Diego

  They have a naval base there

  And I guess some people

  Like to keep their navels and their bases

  Covered.

  My American Underpants

  Are louder than

  My Aussie daks

  Or my British boxers

  Or even my Russian baggies.

  And somehow, when I opened my luggage in

  Brisbane …

  They'd made it to the top of the pile!

  (Maybe it was something to do with … customs.)

  My American Underpants

  Are confident

  They're sassy

  They're even bossy.

  And they don't like to get tossed around.

  I've noticed they get very agitated

  In the washing machine and

  The first time I hung them out on the line

  They looked too bright in the Queensland sun.

  I heard them complaining to the next-door knickers

  That they are far too ‘high tech’ to hang

  On a Hills hoist. For they can simply

  Of course, My American Underpants are talkative

  And charming. They can talk the pants off

  Well – me for one.

  And they've even taken over my drawers!

  (My other undies …

  … hardly get a look in these days.

  They're getting a bit slack too now.

  Sometimes they've been known to fall off the job.

  And all because they've been DAZZLED

  By my snappy American Underpants

  Who run a tight ship down-under – Yes Sir!)

  One time though

  They thought they were being bugged

  When I had ants in my pants.

  They can be a bit touchy you see

  And too big for their boots.

  Sometimes they think the SUN

  Shines out of their red, white and blue

  Bottoms.

  I don't like My American Underpants then.

  Sometimes they plot

  To cover ALL BASES and possibly

  ALL NAVELS all over the world!

  They ride high at these times.

  That makes me uncomfortable.

  Can I really relax with them?

  Odds are, they'll desert me one day

  And leave me without a leg to stand in.

  There'll be friction. There'll be stress.

  They'll get frayed at the edges,

  Leave me without a shred of … human decency!

  But I mustn't get too worked up. (They don't.)

  Life's too brief to get down

  About upwardly mobile, upstart American shorts …

  And their BIG, BOLD, BRIGHT designs …

  But just to be sure

  Yesterday I shrunk My American Underpants

  They got what was coming to them

  They ended up in hot water

  And it cut them down to size.

  Of course, they protested.

  Something about the TWENTIETH amendment

  To their constitution … the right to be SUPER-SIZED!

  So … ‘It was fun while it lasted!’ I said

  To My American Underpants

  And I put them firmly in their place.

  Back in the bottom drawer.

  After all, they may be talkative

  Charming and empowered

  But when you get down to the nitty gritty

  They are just a pair of undies.

  And because I'm in charge now

  Because I've crawled out from underneath,

  I'll let them have the last word.

  WHAT A BUMMER!

  Nothing is Going

  Michael Wagner

  Squinting up at the sky

  Through the driver's window

  Sun blinding one eye

  A puffing red face

  Worrying the traffic

  Working out how to go faster than that

  How to change instincts from anchor to keel

  How to tack

  How to land on both wheels

  And nothing in this grown-up world is moving

  Nothing is going

  No thing

  Except him

  He's going

  To remember all the feelings

  The Problem With Self-help

  Michael Wagner

  I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person I am a good person am I a good person

  Annabelle in the Airwaves

  Sofie Laguna

  Illustrated by Mitch Vane

  Thank you Annabelle

  Golden pup

  For all those gifts of rolled-up socks

  On the doorstep

  Yellow dog

  Milk-eyed

  Retriever

  Thank you

  For surviving

  Mum's repeated

  Slit-eye beatings

  Punishment

  For pissing on floors

  Tearing apart

  That pale

  Too precious garden

  Four of us children

  And a savage divorce

  You carried

  On your squat waddling back

  Like the Pal-eating princess

  You always were

  Trusted

  When all else was lions and fire

  It was me

  Who found

  Your greying body

  Wheezing

  Cancer-eyed

  In the uncut grass

  Behind the house

  I am so sorry for your abandonment

  But I too

  Went hungry

  Angel dog

  I commune with you still

  In the car, late at night, tear-faced

  I imagine you're somewhere in the airwaves

  Watching me

  As carefully

  As you did the night

  When nobody came home

  We turned on every light in the house

  And sat

  By the front door

  Waiting

  Together.

  How to Go Fishing

  (for Alasdair)

  Catherine Bateson

  You must be thirteen again, a speckling of

  blackheads across your nose.
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  You must be awkwardly angular

  with a belly as soft as a trout's.

  You must talk river, bone

  and star.

  You must be silent about love

  and all deep places.

  You must follow your shadow

  humming no recognisable song.

  You must be prepared

  for nothing.

  You must always be able to swing home

  empty-handed but for the sun under your

  fingernails.

  The Whippet Blues

  Catherine Bateson

  Illustrated by Mitch Vane

  I've got the whippset rib cage blues,

  sick of being skinny

  with only chicken necks to eat

  and tired of running fast.

  I've got the whippet blues.

  I want to be a whoppet

  with a fob watch and a paunch.

  I want to be a whoppet

  eating Maccas with the lot.

  I've got the whippet blues

  oh yeah, the whippet rib cage blues.

  I'm sick of chasing rabbits

  tired of wallabies

  I hate those chicken necks

  and shiverin’ in the breeze.

  I've got the whippet blues

  oh yeah, the whippet rib cage blues.

  I want to be a snippet

  (that's just a little whippet

  smaller than a packet of tea)

  I'd be tucked into a jacket

  spoilt just like a shitty zhu

  (and live in ritzy Toorak, too,

  with a man who drives a BMW)

  oh man, I've got those whippet blues.

  I'm sick of chasing rabbits

  tired of wallabies

  I hate those chicken necks

  and shiverin’ in the breeze.

  I've got the whippet blues

  oh yeah, the whippet rib cage blues.

  I want to be a hippet, wear a blue bandana

  all the way down Brunswick Street.

  Want to sit outside a fake cantina

  watch the Fitzroy staffies work the beat.

  I want to sip a pupocino, argue Foucault

  wear some day-glo, be an urban hero.

  I've got the whippet blues,

  the skinny rib cage, chicken neck blues.

  I'm so sick of chasing rabbits

  tired of those wallabies

  I hate the doggone chicken necks

  and shiverin’ in the breeze.

  I've got the whippet blues.

  oh yeah mama,

  got those skinny whippet blues.

  Farewell Song

  Meme McDonald

  Old man

  may there be a gentle rest

  for you tonight

  The moon is dark

  the stars hard pressed

  to keep alight

  on this dead night

  and warrior sun

  he's slow to rise

  cos things aren't right

  old man

  there's things not right

  no they just aren't right

  on the land tonight

  Old man

  may there be a gentle sleep

  for you tonight

  Children die young

  with no way home

  as troops march in

  on this dead night

  a wild wind blows

  reckless with might

  cos things aren't right

  old man

  there's things not right

  no they just aren't right

  on the land tonight

  Old man

  may there be a gentle grave

  for you tonight

  Stories are sold

  for tricks and treats

  secrets spoken

  on this dead night

  the curlew call

  he wakes in fright

  cos things aren't right

  old man

  there's things not right

  no they just aren't right

  on the land tonight

  Old man

  may there be a gentle song

  for you tonight

  Tupa the Snake

  shifts in his skin

  beneath dry earth

  on this dead night

  the evening star

  she chases a moon

  old man

  to cradle your soul

  till things come right

  on the land tonight

  Old man

  may the spirits sing you home

  on this good night

  Sweet is the dream

  for those who tread

  the quiet back roads

  on this good night

  following footsteps

  hidden from sight

  old man

  on this good night

  yes on this good night

  on the land tonight

  we walk together

  watered by stars

  shining for you

  on this good night

  for you old man

  for you good night

  About the contributors

  Deborah Abela

  Deborah worked as a producer/writer for kids’ TV for seven years before leaving to write children's novels. She's the author of the Max Remy Superspy and Jasper Zammit (Soccer Legend) series, which she wrote with the legendary Johnny Warren.

  Allan Baillie

  Allan was born in Scotland – and there's a bit of Scotland in ‘The Fog’ – but when he was seven he came to Australia. He was a journalist, but now is just an author. Allan's last book was Cat's Mountain but there are two more coming, The Wave and Krakatoa Lighthouse. He sails or swims when possible.

  Dianne Bates

  Dianne (Di) has published many books for young people. She is the editor of an online magazine, Buzz Words, (www.buzzwordsmagazine.com) for people in the children's book industry. Di is married to children's author Bill Condon. Their website is www.enterprisingwords.com.

  Catherine Bateson

  Catherine, who started her writing life as a poet, is an award-winning writer for young readers and young adults. Her latest book, Being Bee, won the CBCA Book of the Year Award for Younger Readers.

  Jenny Blackford

  Jenny has always loved the myths and legends of the ancient world. Her stories have appeared in many publications, including the Hadley Rille anthology Ruins Terra, the NSW School Magazine, 30 Australian Ghost Stories for Children and a story about trolls in Jack Dann's Dreaming Again.

  Sue Bursztynski

  Sue was brought up in the beachside suburbs of Melbourne, where she still lives, with several pot plants and a lot of handcraft she's done over the years. She works in a secondary school library and teaches ESL. Sue remembers the day Armstrong and Aldrin walked on the moon.

  Isobelle Carmody

  Isobelle began writing The Obernewtyn Chronicles while still at secondary school. Since then she has established herself as one of Australia's leading writers of fantasy. Her award-winning book, The Gathering, was a joint winner of the 1993 CBC Book of the Year Award and the 1994 Children's Literature Peace Prize.

  Sherryl Clark

  Sherryl has been writing fiction and poetry for more than 20 years. Recently her poems have ganged up and become verse novels. The first, Farm Kid, won the 2005 NSW Premier's Award for Children's Books. The second, Sixth Grade Style Queen (Not!) was published by Penguin in May 2007.

  Paul Collins

  The editor of many anthologies, including Dream Weavers and Tales from the Wasteland, Paul also edited The MUP Encyclopaedia of Australian Science Fiction and Fantasy. He has been short-listed for several awards for editing, and has won the Peter McNamara, Aurealis and William Atheling awards. His website is www.paulcollins.com.au.

  Bill Condon

  Bill is the author of several young adult books, two of which, Dogs and No Worries, were Honour Books in the Ch
ildren's Book Council Awards. He has written close to one hundred books for children. Bill is married to author Dianne Bates. They live near the seaside in Wollongong, New South Wales.

  Meredith Costain

  Meredith lives in Melbourne with a menagerie of pets. Her work ranges from picture books to popular fiction and non-fiction, and she is the literary editor of three children's magazines. Meredith's books include Freeing Billy, It's True: Hauntings Happen and Ghosts Get Grumpy and Doodledum Dancing. Visit her at www.meredithcostain.com.

  Gary Crew

  Gary is one of Australia's most awarded authors, winning the Children's Book of the Year award four times and numerous other awards. He lives with his wife Christine on their property in the Blackall Ranges, near Maleny, in South East Queensland. He has three children and four grandchildren.

  Justin D'Ath

  Justin has written 24 books for children and young adults, including the very popular Extreme Adventure series, which features Sam Fox from ‘Wild Africa’. His latest YA novel is Pool. Justin lives with his partner Ryn and dog Holly beside a river in the hills north of Melbourne.

  Hazel Edwards

  Best known for There's a Hippopotamus on Our Roof Eating Cake, Hazel also writes YA novels such as Outback Ferals and ‘short’ crime. Recently she co-authored Cycling Solo: Ireland to Istanbul with her cartographer son Trevelyan Quest. Hobbies are belly dancing and asking questions. Visit her at www.hazeledwards.com.

  Janet Findlay

  Janet has been an actor, performance poet and radio copywriter. She has co-written many scripts, including the satirical 50s musical ‘The Heartache & Sorrow Show’ with Cathy Downes – performed at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. Janet lives in South East Queensland where she regularly impersonates the Queen.

  Kate Forsyth

  Kate is the bestselling author of numerous books for children and adults, including The Gypsy Crown – the adventures of two Romany children in the time of Oliver Cromwell – Dragon Gold, The Starthorn Tree, and a picture book, I Am. She is also the author of the popular Witches of Eileanan series.

  Scot Gardner

  Scot lives in the Strzelecki mountain range in eastern Victoria. He flies his kites, collects skulls and makes musical instruments from weeds. His writing is mostly realist fiction for young adults and includes White Ute Dreaming, Burning Eddy, The Legend of Kevin the Plumber and Gravity. Visit his website www.scotgardner.com.

  Grant Gittus

  Grant has always had a keen interest in science fiction and fantasy and has been responsible for a number of book covers, illustrations, T-shirts, posters and even co-authored the world-famous Biker Baby Learns to Count with Rod Tokely. For relaxation he operates a small graphic design business in South Melbourne, Victoria. Visit www.gggraphics.com.au.

 

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