Never Had a Dream Come True

by Jennifer Wenn

  “A party sounds like a perfect ending to this last year’s ups and downs,” Charles agreed, and was awarded a thankful smile.

  “Why not a masquerade?” the duchess mused. “We could invite everyone we know to a grand ball, and let everyone live out their most secret fantasies, and in the height of the evening we will announce Penny’s and Thomas’s engagement. It will be perfect!”

  “A masquerade at a house party?” Rake chuckled. “Mother, you know you are more or less begging for scandals to happen.”

  The duchess blushed and mumbled something inaudible, which told them all she was perfectly aware of this.

  “Why create the perfect opportunity for scandals?” Jamie frowned at his mother, whose blush deepened.

  “So everyone will forget about Penny’s strange situation in life, living with us and not her own family. You know as well as I we can’t invite the de Vere family, as Lord Nester will never accept such an invitation. But in the midst of scandals happening, no one will think twice about it, and if we announce the engagement as late as possible, they probably won’t even notice that Penny’s family isn’t present.”

  “Oh.”

  “Well, when you put it like that, it unfortunately makes perfect sense. A masquerade it is, then.” The duke leaned back, resigned, as he too knew Penny needed as good a start in her new married life as possible. She didn’t need a touch of scandal.

  “I know the perfect outfit for me.” The duchess squealed with anticipation. “This is so exciting; I can hardly wait!”

  “Do we all have to wear costumes?” Jamie asked cautiously, not too pleased with his mother’s grand plans.

  “Of course you do. And don’t you think I will accept any excuses. You will all participate, even if I have to drag you there myself.”

  “I hate masquerades.”

  The duchess patted Jamie’s knee. “I know, my dear, you always have. But don’t you ever think that’s reason enough to not attend.”

  Unanimous in their distaste for such an event, all the men in the salon sighed, defeated, and Penny almost smiled. Lady Anna was quite petite, but she ruled the large men of her family with a firm albeit loving hand.

  Of course they would do as she told them. Not one of them knew how to deny her anything, not even the duke.

  “And for you, Penny dear, we are going to come up with the most spectacular outfit, one which will send Mr. Bedford and the rest of our guests crawling for mercy at your feet.”

  “Mother, I don’t think Penny would appreciate that,” Rake said, to Penny’s surprise. “She’s not the flamboyant kind.”

  “But she needs to be seen.”

  “I don’t want to be seen.”

  Mother and son didn’t acknowledge Penny. Instead they frowned intensely at each other.

  “It’s a masquerade. No one will know it’s her.”

  “At the unveiling they will. And as they stand there in perfect awe over who this siren is, we are going to announce the engagement and turn the evening into one of the most talked about for years to come.”

  “I think you exaggerate the importance of the right costume,” Rake insisted. “I think Penny would be much more comfortable in something not as overwhelming.”

  “Fine.” The duchess shrugged. “Then you will take care of Penny’s outfit. You two can go to the seamstress in Sandhurst. She’s quite handy when it comes to masquerade costumes.”

  So that had been her game all along.

  Anna Darling, the Duchess of Berkeley, knew her son too well and had lured him into her trap without even breaking a sweat. Penny couldn’t stop a smile as Rake sat back in his chair, staring at his mother.

  The duke had once said England could win any war if the War Ministry would only be wise enough to put Anna Darling in charge of the planning.

  “You can go for the first visit tomorrow, and I will send a maid with you as chaperone. We don’t want to create another scandal this close to the wedding, do we?”

  Rake shook his head slowly, an amused grin lighting his features. “No, Mother, of course not. I will take Penny to Mrs. Frazer and have her order something appropriate for the ball.”

  “With a maid.”

  “Yes, Mother, I will bring a maid.”

  “Don’t you try to patronize me. I’m your mother, and if anyone is going to patronize someone, it is I who will patronize you. I know of your reputation as a libertine—no need for you to try denying it—and these last couple of months haven’t made you any less libertine in the eyes of the ton, I must say.”

  Rake shrugged. “I am what I am because of how you have brought me up. Can’t hold your own choices against me now, can you?”

  “Richard Darling!”

  The duke howled with laughter. “That’s my boy. Always look upon the bright side of life and put the blame where it belongs—on your parents.”

  “Hannibal Darling!”

  “What?”

  The duchess stared openmouthed at her husband. “Really, Hannibal? Put the blame where it belongs? Whenever have I told Richard to go and behave as badly as he can?”

  “I…”

  “And have I ever told my son, whom I love most dearly, to turn every little chance of happiness away?”

  “No, I…”

  “Are you saying I applaud his decision to let the only woman for whom he has ever shown feelings marry another man without even a blink, so he can continue his restless bachelor life of bedding as many women as he can?”

  “Mother!”

  “Charles, be quiet. This is not for you. This is between me and my husband.”

  “So please take it upstairs. The rest of us would rather have a nice cup of tea instead of having to listen to this. It’s quite embarrassing, you know.”

  The duchess shrieked, and Penny bit back another smile. The older woman loved her drama and knew how to use it. The men in the salon stared at the duchess, horror written all over their handsome faces, and not one of them dared to move for fear of provoking her anger.

  As the duchess ranted about who was embarrassing and who was not, Penny quietly stepped unnoticed out of the room and left the temporarily not-so-happy family alone.

  Rake hadn’t looked too pleased with his mother as she mentioned his choices, but it was hard to tell if he disliked her mentioning his feelings or the way she had slaughtered his lifestyle.

  Everyone knew Rake had an affection for Penny, even she did, although until recently it had been only a brotherly affection. She had always wished for and dreamt about more from him, as had his family.

  But it wasn’t Rake’s fault he didn’t love her as much as she wanted him to. No one probably ever would.

  She just wasn’t a loveable person, she guessed.

  For some reason she always brought out the compassion in people. Love—especially the world-turning kind she had read about and longed for—seemed to elude her.

  If she were completely honest with herself, she would have been satisfied with a man loving her just a tenth of how much she usually had dreamt Rake should.

  She stopped halfway up the stairs and closed her eyes. A satisfied little smile came crawling as her old friends reappeared inside her head.

  She had missed them, the daydreams. They had filled her head most of her life and put a golden frame to her meager life. Yet ever since that precious moment when she had met Rake at the lake she had tried to stop them, in an attempt to force herself to grow up and face reality.

  But it wasn’t for her. She knew that now.

  She would marry Thomas without remorse, as he knew the truth about her and didn’t hold it against her. She would take care of him and spoil him with a calm and sated life. And if her head would occasionally fill with dreams about another man and a life which never would be hers—so be it.

  Her heart belonged to Rake and always would.

  But she wanted more out of life than he had offered her so far. This morning’s incident hadn’t changed her chosen path at all. She would s
till go on with her engagement and marriage to Thomas.

  But if Rake would come forward…

  Maybe Charmaine had been right all along when she had told her not to close out any options? It wouldn’t hurt to be open-minded when it came to Rake, as long as it didn’t mean becoming his mistress.

  If Rake looked at her again as he had this morning, when he still thought he had saved her, she would know it was for real and for life. That look had been honest and emotional and not Rake’s normal indifferent amusement.

  “Daydreaming about me?”

  She woke from her thoughts and turned to look down at Rake, who had come up behind her on the stairs and stopped a few steps farther down.

  Her spontaneous reaction was to deny, but then a little imp inside told her to for once open up to him. She had never let him come closer emotionally to her than an arm’s length, to save her poor heart from more suffering.

  But she was a different woman now.

  She had lived through a year which would have knocked most women down forever, yet somehow she had found strength to move on.

  Moments ago she had decided not to close down the option of Rake, so why not let him in a little bit. The best, of course, would be to flirt with him, but she didn’t know how to do that.

  “Actually, yes,” she said and forced herself to smile lightly toward him.

  “Really?” His smile deepened. “Seeing yourself in my arms, perhaps?”

  “Maybe.”

  She must have succeeded to seem flirtatious, as she could see his eyes widen a bit in surprise at her response.

  “Maybe? What a confusing answer to come from your delicious lips.” He took two more steps until he stood next to her, giving those just-mentioned lips a smoldering gaze. Without thinking, she nervously bit her lower lip, and he growled as he grabbed her waist and leaned closer to her. “Bloody hell, Penny…”

  She gasped as his lips closed in on hers, and again he growled, sounding as barbaric as he had earlier this morning. This was not the fashionable gentleman—this was the savage man inside him responding to her.

  Her heart pounded hard as she looked into his eyes and felt the heat. Without a doubt she knew she preferred this Rake to the socializing libertine.

  This was her Rake.

  She felt his breath wash over her face, and before she had a chance to change her mind she grabbed his neck and helped his lips find their way.

  The force of the kiss was amazing.

  He was amazing.

  The kiss continued on and on as his hands moved over her and hers over him, each exploring the new territory. Afterwards she knew she would have lost her virginity most willingly in the grand stairwell of Chester Park if the butler, Ivanoff, had not interrupted them with a haughty “Hrrrm.”

  Penny thought her cheeks would explode from the hot blush that flowed into them. She was mortified with embarrassment. Not only was she found in the arms of a man who wasn’t her fiancé, she was also most openly kissing him without a thought of who might walk in on them.

  Ivanoff obviously had the same thought.

  “You can be thankful it was me who found you, Master Richard. Had it been anyone else, Miss Penelope’s engagement would have been off and you, sir, would have had to marry her yourself.”

  Rake opened his mouth to speak, but Penny cut in before he had a chance to say a word. “Thank you, Ivanoff. This will never happen again.”

  With a lovely smile, one he reserved for only her and Francesca, Ivanoff acknowledged her words.

  “Anything for you, Miss Penelope. As for you…” The butler turned to Rake, and this time there was no lovely smile, only a menacing glare. “You deflowering bastard…”

  Rake arched an amused eyebrow over the butler’s obvious anger. “Deflowering? Ivanoff, really?”

  With a wagging finger the butler took a step closer to his young master. “You should be ashamed of yourself. Throwing yourself all over an innocent young miss like that? Where is your self-respect?”

  “When it comes to Penny, I seem to have lost it completely.”

  Ivanoff snorted. “Off you go, you young fool. Off and find some other woman to lose the steam with and let this little girl stay innocent until her wedding day.”

  And without listening to her halfhearted protests, the butler more or less dragged Penny upstairs and didn’t leave until she had closed her bedroom door behind her.

  Well inside, she threw herself on the bed with a thud.

  What a strange, wonderful day.

  She closed her eyes as the memory of Rake’s hands touching her body came back to her. It had been pure heaven until Ivanoff had interrupted them. At the moment she had felt a bit annoyed with the kind butler, but now she was only thankful.

  She sighed, a bit embarrassed as she thought about Thomas. He was such a kind, good man and not at all deserving of a fiancée who dreamt about another man.

  The only thing making the engagement still seem real for her was how they never once had lied and called it love. They were friends, and as friends they planned to enter holy matrimony.

  If not Rake…

  A deep sigh from the bottom of her heart escaped her as she sat up again, not as giddy anymore. She had to stop hoping Rake would do the honorable thing. When it came to women he wasn’t honorable. At least not if it would include more than a few hours of mutual pleasure. And especially not if it meant something more lasting—like marriage.

  For a married woman seeking a bit of excitement, he must seem the perfect man. But to an unwed virgin he was nothing more than the devil in the disguise of an eligible bachelor.

  She would give him a chance to step forward. It was all she could do. For her to ask him to marry her was out of the question. Besides her disliking the mere thought of being the joke of the next Darling dinner, she wanted—no, needed—him to come to her.

  He knew what she felt for him.

  She had thoughtlessly made that quite clear to him at the Green Park picnic all those months ago. Not that it had gained her anything. He had only tried harder to convince her to become his mistress.

  But the past was the past.

  Tomorrow they were heading to Sandhurst, and she would make the most out of the little trip. It was only a few months until her wedding, and as soon as she had Thomas’s ring on her finger she would never be able to spend time alone with Rake.

  It was unheard of—a platonic friendship between a married lady and an unmarried gentleman. Of course they would meet at social occasions at Chester Park over the years. But they would never be able to do more than exchange a few polite words, and never would they find themselves alone together again.

  She knew there were many married ladies who got themselves a lover, someone like Rake. Indeed, rumors said he had been lover to most of the married ladies of the ton. But she could never do such a thing to Thomas. If they married, she would become his forever. And even if her mind and heart might dream of a man who never would be hers, so be it. What Thomas didn’t know would never hurt him. And as she wasn’t about to tell anyone about her daydreaming, Thomas would live happily ever after, which was all she could wish for.

  But until then…

  She was still unmarried and free to roam the countryside with the man of her heart—and a maid for chaperone.

  Tomorrow they were heading to Sandhurst, and anything could happen.

  Chapter Fourteen

  “Lady Penelope, you look lovelier than ever.”

  Penny blushed as Rake bowed over her hand and put small lingering kisses on her fingertips.

  “As do you, Lord Richard,” she breathed. “As do you.”

  Rake chuckled softly as he straightened his back again without releasing her hand. “I know. I have tried to look my best for you.”

  “Must have taken you all night.” Jamie ducked as Rake took a swing with his free hand and countered with a pat on his twin’s back that could easily have made a smaller man crumble. But Rake was used to his brother’s a
ntics and didn’t budge.

  “James and Richard, behave.”

  The duchess emerged onto the front stair, where the threesome stood in the warm morning sun, waiting for the carriage that would take them to Sandhurst.

  “I thought you had left already and had forgotten the promise you made me yesterday.”

  Rake lifted an inquiring eyebrow, but before he could speak a young maid came forward, clad in her best clothes.

  Penny bit back a smile. So this young and inexperienced maid, with eyes as big as saucers, was their chaperone? Did the duchess want them to do something they shouldn’t, so she could get her heart’s wish fulfilled without having to continue with the masquerade plans?

  “Great.” Rake grinned wickedly. “She will fit just perfectly in the other carriage.”

  “What other carriage?”

  Rake gave his frowning mother an innocent look. “Oh, did I forget to mention I was taking my new phaeton for a drive? Testing it, you know. And as you are well aware, a phaeton only holds two people. So I had the town coach ordered forward for the maid to travel in.”

  “The town coach? For one person? A bit much, don’t you think?”

  “I’m going, too,” Jamie interjected sternly. “I have some errands to do in town, and this arrangement suits me just fine. The maid can share my carriage with me, and I will make sure the phaeton stays close and in sight the whole way.”

  The last part was directed to his twin, who shook his head with feigned sorrow. “Why does it sound as if everyone thinks I will do something lewd to Penny if we happen to get out of sight?”

  “Because you will,” his brother and mother said unanimously, and Rake shrugged toward Penny.

  “I guess they’re right. You’re too gorgeous for me to keep my hands off, if we manage to get lost.”

  “Richard!”

  “I said ‘if.’ ”

  “You said it as though you were planning to get lost.”

  “Of course I’m not planning to. But if we were… Let’s say I wouldn’t mind a little solitude among friends.”

  “Penny, you can go with Jamie in his carriage, instead. I’m reluctant to admit my son has lost his common sense.”