“And here I thought you would love to have a good solid reason to force me into marrying poor Penny.”
“So I might be a bit partial when it comes to whom Penny is to marry, but it doesn’t mean I will allow you to handle her any way you like. You are a gentleman, even if you seem to forget that a little too often.”
Rake rolled his eyes toward Penny. “And she thinks I lost my common sense.”
The duchess gasped. “I heard that!”
Penny laughed as Rake grinned wickedly toward her behind his mother’s back. Oh, how she loved this family. Someone who didn’t know them as well as she did would probably be shocked over how outrageously they behaved to each other when not in public.
But not she. She had grown up listening to their constant bickering and their strange discussions, and she knew this was something she would miss immensely if she married Thomas. Neither she nor Thomas had many relatives, and she guessed it would be a bit lonely at family occasions.
“Ah, there are the coaches,” the duchess exclaimed, and soon the four of them were seated in the two carriages, with Rake and Penny in the phaeton and Jamie with the maid in the larger, more practical carriage.
As soon as they were beyond the gates of Chester Park, Rake increased the speed and left the others farther and farther behind, but Penny didn’t mind. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the warmth of the September morning’s sun caressing her face.
Rake hadn’t lied when he told his mother the coach was new to him. During most of the ride to Sandhurst he tried out different turns and speeds, ignoring Penny except for informing her of various utterly uninteresting tidbits regarding this fantastic vehicle.
As they arrived in Sandhurst, Penny was relieved to leave the carriage behind and meet up with Jamie and the maid outside Mrs. Frazer’s shop.
Jamie was frowning more than ever as he told them to meet him at the inn in a couple of hours, and Rake shook his head, saddened as he watched his twin’s back disappear into the crowd.
“There is something bothering him, something which consumes him from inside out. But he just won’t tell me.”
“Maybe he doesn’t know how to.”
“I’m his twin. He can tell me anything.”
Penny put her hand on Rake’s arm. “But maybe he has seen or done something which he feels is so horrendous that he doesn’t know how to tell anyone, even you. You know what Raleigh told us when he came back from the frontier—it was worse than hell on earth.”
“But I’m his twin…”
She cut a sideways glance at him. Even while frowning he was still one of the most handsome men she had ever met. He wasn’t as perfectly beautiful as Francesca’s new husband was, but with Rake it was something more than simply good looks. It was something in the air about him. Something with how he held his head, how he moved his hands, how his eyes twinkled when he smiled.
Even now, when the twinkle was gone and an ugly frown marked his forehead, he still looked special and unique.
“Maybe you two should go somewhere and just talk about what’s in both of your hearts.”
She caught his attention with that remark.
“Whatever do you mean? Has Jamie said something to you?”
“He’s been a bit worried about you lately.”
Rake snorted. “Why? There’s nothing with me to worry about.”
She managed to keep herself from rolling her eyes. He must have the shortest memory in history. Or maybe he never had thought twice about how he had been acting over the last months.
“Maybe not, but still, Jamie was worried.”
“What? Did he say something to you?”
“Not much. He said he had tried to talk to you but you hadn’t been very approachable.”
Rake frowned. “It doesn’t sound like me. I’m not the one to refuse to talk to my family, especially not Jamie. That’s been more his game lately.”
“Exactly his words. And also the reason he felt he couldn’t push it with you, as he himself hadn’t been sharing much with you or anyone in your family.”
“Did he say something about himself?”
Penny shook her head. “No. We agreed we both had our share of secrets we didn’t want to talk about, and then we continued to talk about you.”
“Much more interesting subject, eh,” Rake drawled, and she laughed politely.
“It wasn’t a subject that lasted long, though. Not much to talk about there.”
“You minx.” Rake grinned at her and offered her his arm. “Come on, let’s go find Mrs. Frazer and have her sew the perfect outfit for you. We can continue this conversation later, when we’re not surrounded by too many ears.”
They strolled through the small town with the maid a few steps behind. Now and then they would meet an acquaintance of Rake’s, and he greeted them all lightly, although the ladies always got the grin with the wicked gleam.
Inside Mrs. Frazer’s shop, he continued his reckless flirting, and soon he had all the seamstresses giggling and batting their eyelashes. The women competed with each other to find the perfect fabric for the dress to be bought, but not one of them asked Penny, the one who would wear the dress.
No, they were all too busy flirting with the handsome gentleman who promised them everything with his twinkling eyes and fast smiles.
Penny was ushered farther and farther away from Rake until she stood in the back of the shop, desperately trying to hide the jealousy which was eating her. She hated that he had such power over her. It made her feel so small and petty. He was very much the confirmed bachelor and she was engaged to another man. He had every right to flirt with other women. But still…
She really didn’t like it.
To keep herself occupied with something else and not stand there fuming at Rake’s behavior, she went to the table where all the fabrics lay, turning her back to the commotion and letting her fingers play with the delicate materials.
“They’re so beautiful.” The young maid stood on the opposite side of the table, staring at the rich materials between them.
“Yes, they are. I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to choose only one.”
The maid let her hand lightly touch the nearest fabric, a thin pink muslin with small white flowers sewn over it. “So beautiful,” she whispered in awe, and Penny, who had grown up in a home which lacked funds, knew exactly how the girl felt.
It wasn’t envy, it was amazement at the luxury you never would be able to afford.
“What’s your name?”
To Penny’s surprise the maid froze, as if she had asked her to tell a terrible secret, not just a name.
“Mina.”
“Mina? How unusual. Is it a nickname?”
“No. It’s just Mina.”
Penny recognized the need of secrecy when she saw it and didn’t push further. She gave the maid an understanding smile. “Mina it is, then.”
The relief in Mina’s face was almost laughable, but Penny had no problem holding back a smile as all the women behind her giggled hysterically over something Rake had said.
Instead she muttered something inaudible about men and punching bags before pretending to again look at the fabrics which now had, in her eyes, lost all their earlier glory.
“He never takes his eyes off you.”
She met the compassionate eyes of Mina and knew she should set the maid straight: This was not the manner in which to address your superiors.
But something inside held her back. There was something about this maid that didn’t add up, and Penny knew there had to be a story here. The only problem was that Mina was one of the duchess’s personal maids, and she knew better than to question that particular lady or anyone she presented.
So she let the slight overstep pass and instead asked the question which burnt on her lips. “He doesn’t?”
“Not once. He flirts and laughs with all the women surrounding him, but his eyes never leave your person.”
“That’s nice.”
�
�Isn’t it?”
They shared a secretive smile, two young women in a small world where unspoken boundaries made a friendship impossible. They giggled as they moved into the next room of the shop—and out of Rake’s line of sight—where more tables held more colorful fabrics. Mirrors were placed in a corner, surrounding a small podium so fittings could be made in full overview.
“Isn’t that your fiancé outside?”
Penny looked through the window to where Mina pointed, and she nodded with a pleased smile. “Yes, that is Thomas. Is there a door there? I would rather not have to go back through the other room.”
Mina took a few steps farther into that side of the shop. “Yes, there is another door in the next room, and it leads back into the street.”
“Penny!”
Thomas’s happiness over unexpectedly meeting her was evident, and it soothed the edginess Rake’s outrageous flirting had created in her.
“Are you visiting the seamstress?”
“Yes, Lady Anna has decided to honor us and our engagement with a masquerade ball, and I needed something to wear.”
“A masquerade ball?”
“What is it with men and masquerades?” Penny laughed. “When Lady Anna came up with the idea yesterday, most of the Darling men looked like they had taken a sip of Almack’s infamous lemonade.”
Thomas blushed. “I didn’t mean to sound ungrateful. It’s just that…I don’t really…” He pulled his fingers through his windswept blond hair and took a deep breath. “Damn it, Penny, it’s a bloody masquerade! I sort of detest those.”
“Me too,” Penny admitted. “I tried to talk her out of it, but she was quite determined, and in the end I couldn’t refuse such generosity.”
“Thank you, my dearest Penelope,” he breathed with relief and put his hand softly against her cheek. “For you I will clench my teeth together and stoically endure such a horrendous evening.”
They laughed lightly together, two friends in perfect harmony. Everything with Thomas was easy; they were a match made in a sensible heaven, and their life together would be serene and without surprises.
She thought of the man of her dreams, who currently was spending his time flirting with seven very eager ladies in the shop behind her. Life with Rake would never be dull or lonely, but it wouldn’t be a calm road. There would be more bumps than she would ever be able to count, but she knew it would be worth it—if he only loved her.
And there was the sum of everything.
If Rake loved her, she wouldn’t let anything or anyone stand in the way of their mutual happiness—as long as it meant his ring on her finger.
But if he didn’t… Or if he did but chose not to act upon it… Then she would continue with life as it was, including marrying her friend Thomas and being perfectly and sensibly content.
“Would you like to join me for a cup of tea at the inn? I have most of my errands done and would really like to sit down for a while, and what could be better than having you sitting next to me.”
He looked like a small child waiting for a present, and right then she would have given anything to be able to tell him yes, but she had things to do herself, and if Rake would stop flirting with the seamstresses she might even get her errands done.
“Sorry, old chap, but today she’s mine.”
Thomas stiffened as a cold voice interrupted their conversation, and Penny could tell he hadn’t forgiven Rake completely yet for the slight yesterday morning. Slowly he turned and met the dark, inscrutable eyes of his antagonist, who stood surrounded by women excited at the prospect of a fight between two dashing gentlemen.
Penny looked from Thomas’s frowning face to Rake’s cold and arrogant one and knew she had to do something before they disgraced themselves in front of everyone on the street.
“Thomas, I can’t go with you to the inn today. The duchess has ordered Rake to help me with the choice of my dress, and later we are meeting with Jamie for tea. Another time, perhaps?”
Thomas tore his gaze from Rake and looked down into her eyes. She tried wordlessly to convince him to humor her this time. No more drama, if you please. For once he seemed uncommonly perceptive, as he gave her a small smile. “I wouldn’t dream of intruding on your plans. Perhaps I could come and visit you tomorrow afternoon? Say five o’clock?”
“Please do. I would be honored.”
“We all would be deeply honored,” Rake drawled behind her, and she could see Thomas tense again. Quickly she put a hand against his cheek, just as he earlier had put his against hers.
“Please,” she whispered. “Don’t mind him. He’s just being a pain in the…you know.”
Thomas bent his head until his forehead almost touched hers. “For you, my dearest wife-to-be, anything.”
“Enough time wasted,” Rake said as he grabbed Penny at the waist and dragged her back toward him and the shop. “Let’s get the bloody dress ordered, shall we?”
And without letting Penny tell Thomas farewell, other than a wave and a glance she managed over her shoulder, he barged into the shop again with her in tow, Mina closely following. Penny could do nothing but acquiesce. This time Rake didn’t care about flirting with the seamstresses. Instead he sat down on a chair and looked at her pointedly.
“What?” she asked, when she could no longer stand his staring.
“Do you have any preference? Any disguise you find more alluring?”
“Oh.” So she was supposed to have ideas, was she? “I don’t know. I have never been to a masquerade. I wouldn’t know what costume to choose.”
Rake leaned his head to the side. “A siren, maybe, just emerged from the water to seduce men into forever and ever lusting for her.”
There was no doubt he spoke of the time at the lake, and Penny blushed. “No,” she chided, embarrassed. “That’s not a disguise anyone would believe for me.”
Rake grinned wickedly. “I would.”
“But this is not for you. This is for Thomas and for our future together.”
“No, my love. This is for you and you only. I don’t care about Boring Saint Thomas and the rest of his life. All I care about is you.”
Why did he say things like that?
Her silly heart immediately skipped a few beats, stupidly believing he meant something with the endearing words. But she knew better.
“All you care about is being obnoxious toward your mother, because she wanted me dressed as something too dramatic.”
She tried to look as bland as possible so he couldn’t see how affected she had been by his words.
For a moment he looked vulnerable, as if her cold cut of his sweet words had hurt him more than she thought possible. But just as quickly the moment was over and the forever wicked libertine leered at her.
“You know me too well.”
“A shepherdess, maybe?” Mina’s voice was heard behind them, and Rake lifted an amused eyebrow toward her.
“So the maid wants to join the discussion? Please do, but then you would have to come up with something better than a common shepherdess. For all I know, half the women there will be dressed as shepherdesses. Quite boring.”
“Oh, I would love to be a shepherdess if it’s the most common outfit. I would blend in.”
“Penny, for goodness’ sake.” Rake snorted. “You have to stop hiding behind everyone else. You are such a beautiful woman, but for some reason you are determined to never let anyone know about it.”
“I don’t hide.”
“Yes, you do. You hide behind anyone who takes more place than you.”
“I do not. I’m just not as interesting as other young ladies, and that is the sole reason for me not being seen.”
Rake shook his head and gave her a knowing look. “You, my love, have always hidden behind others, mostly behind your sister and Fanny. For some reason, you don’t seem to think you are worth the interest, and I think you have succeeded so well with persuading yourself of this that you have made everyone else believe it, too.”
“Thomas sees me.”
“Of course he does. I’m sure you are the living image of the perfect woman to him. How can you not be? You are a beautiful girl with extremely good local connections but without a too-interfering family. You also love to read and, amazingly enough, don’t mind listening to him rant about his—in his mind—intellectual tidbits.”
“Rake,” Penny gasped, outraged over his crude words, and immediately the look in his eyes changed from arrogant contempt to smoldering lust.
“Penny,” he breathed, not hiding the passion he felt for her. She wondered if it was only the presence of Mina and the gaping seamstresses that held him back from kissing her senseless.
With this thought she doubted the trip had been such a good idea after all. Maybe she and Rake needed time apart, to be able to think straight regarding the situation between them. As it was now, both were unable to think about the future when so often interrupted, she by her heart’s erratic bouncing and he by his constant lust.
Soon she would be married to Thomas, and then it would be too late for them, too late for love. Unfortunately, Rake didn’t seem to realize this. Instead he behaved as though nothing out of the ordinary had happened during the past year, as if life as they had known it would continue into eternity and beyond.
Mina, who must have sensed Penny’s desperation, took a step forward. “Lady Penelope, if you go dressed as a shepherdess, maybe Mr. Bedford could go dressed as a shepherd?”
“What a wonderful idea.” Penny clapped her hands together. “I will send Thomas a note about it as soon as possible.”
Rake wandered to the table and rummaged through the delicate fabrics, to the seamstresses’ distraction. “I think going as a sheep would suit him better.”
“Rake!”
He sent her a grin over his shoulder, and she shook her head, defeated. “You just can’t help yourself, can you? You must slander poor Thomas through the gutter even if you know he is better than that.”
“Maybe. Or maybe I only tend to be a bit selfish regarding my belongings and don’t like him thinking he can strut in and take whatever he wants without my consent.”
Oh. So now she was one of his belongings, was she? She shook her head again, but this time she wisely let the subject be. He was, as always, too logically illogical for her to ever be able to make him see her side.
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