Captivity

by Margaret Pargeter

  'I'll endeavour to keep my mind off you by doing some work,' he said dryly.

  The reasons why his mind should be on her could be many. Most likely she irritated him and he was happier thinking of something else. Feeling swamped by misery, she stared silently at the telephone.

  'Do you still love me?' Chase asked suddenly, stunning her completely.

  Swallowing convulsively, she managed to give the impression of being lightly amused. 'What a question to ask a girl over the phone!'

  'I'll ask you this evening.'

  'Any particular reason?' Panic stricken, she was determined to avoid seeing him this evening.

  'I've just been studying your photograph in the morning press. You looked scared to death. Nothing like a girl in love. Yet there's something in your face…'

  Love? He had never so much as mentioned it before. Why now? 'Chase,' she protested, her heart racing with fright, 'it's eight in the morning. Can't we talk about this later?'

  'We can!' he snapped, in such a way that it sounded very much like a threat, harsh enough to leave her trembling, as he hung up.

  All during breakfast, which she tried to eat but couldn't, Alex remembered how he had asked if she still loved him. Surely he didn't suspect anything? It would be the final blow if he forced her to confess she did. Somehow, at any cost, she had to avoid it.

  She was startled by Chase's astuteness when Don Fisher called. 'Alex,' he sounded aggrieved, 'I've just heard the news. Is it true?'

  'If you mean am I engaged yes, I suppose it is.' She coloured faintly at the way she expressed it and hoped Don didn't notice.

  'But Chase Marshall!' he breathed. 'Do you realise who he is?'

  'I know he's not God,' she retorted sharply.

  'Alex!' Don looked hurt. 'I don't like you when you're cynical. Maybe I shouldn't have come round but, after all, I thought you were going to marry me?'

  'You thought so, perhaps,' she felt suddenly too weary to mince words, 'not me!'

  'Well, I had high hopes,' he insisted. 'Your mother…'

  'She's changed her mind, too, you'll find,' Alex said dryly.

  Don missed the irony of this. With a puzzled frown he stared at her. I don't suppose you'd have dinner with me tonight? I'd like a chance to prove I haven't changed.'

  For a moment, thinking of Chase, she was sorely tempted, but knew it wouldn't be fair. No good could come of trying to solve her problems through Don. He could never mean anything to her any more not that he ever had. 'I'm sorry,' she whispered, sending him away.

  At one she entered the high class premises where Chase had arranged to meet her. She wore a pair of cotton jeans and a casual shirt, deliberately chosen in the hope of annoying him so much he wouldn't wish to see her again that day. She looked like a beautiful sixteen-year-old, with her hair tied carelessly at her nape and a shoulder bag slung carelessly over her slim shoulder.

  With every intention to brazen it out, she approached Chase defiantly, her eyes flickering sullenly over the tailored perfection of his suit. As usual, in the city, he looked a high-powered, ruthless business man.

  Even at Coolabra, dressed like his men, he had the appearance of a man born to control a mighty empire.

  It was an image Alex resented, for it was one which promised to defeat her.

  Uncertain as to how he would regard her casual attire, she paused before him. He didn't speak, but for a moment, as she met the smouldering darkness of his eyes, she felt too frightened to move.

  Then, in front of a discreetly interested audience, he kissed her briefly. 'I'd better make sure, if anyone is looking, that they understand I love you, whatever you happen to be wearing.'

  Shrinking from his sarcasm like a blow, Alex went quite white. His voice was so dry that she knew he had never been further from loving her.

  Regarding her shocked face, he said tersely, 'You're doing too much, too quickly. I'll get you a drink.'

  He ordered her a brandy, and whisky for himself. She had noticed he had been drinking quite a lot lately.

  'Isn't it a bit early in the day for this kind of thing?'

  Alex protested, thinking she would rather have sherry. 'Not when one has problems.' He eyed her caustically.

  If she was the problem, why didn't he simply send her away? Reluctantly, because Chase told her abruptly to drink it up, she began sipping her brandy.

  'What have you been doing with yourself this morning?' he asked suddenly. 'Where did you go?'

  'Nowhere. Don Fisher called.'

  Chase's face changed. He looked positively murderous, and his grip on her wrist reflected the fact.

  'Why?' he snarled.

  'To see me, I presume.' Alex winced. 'You're hurting me, Chase!'

  'Really!' he snapped, flinging her wrist away. 'How did he know you were back?'

  The bones of his jaw could be clearly seen under his skin. Nervously Alex licked dry lips. 'He…he reads newspapers…'

  'Alex!' Chase thumped his fist down so hard on the table that their glasses jumped and people glanced at them again. 'I've stood about all I'm going to stand from you! I won't have you talking to Don Fisher.

  'Understood?'

  That he was violently angry under the control he was exercising was obvious, but Alex felt she was fighting for her life. If she gave in to him she could lose her independence for ever. 'I have to be polite to people!'

  'People, yes,' he agreed harshly, 'but that's no excuse for encouraging other men.'

  'I don't encourage other men!' she cried, her face hot at such injustice. 'But what if I did you don't own me. Nor do you love me…'

  'I might not exactly own you,' he replied coldly, jerking her to him so savagely she could see the glittering ice in his eyes, 'but I have a legitimate claim.'

  Her blue eyes froze with resentment. I don't know what you intend to do…'

  'I know what I'd like to do!' he bit back, his glance sliding over her insolently, as hard as diamonds.

  'I'm... I'm hungry,' she muttered feverishly, her pulses jerking. 'Aren't we going to eat?'

  'If you like,' he agreed roughly, as if he didn't care whether he did or not. His eyes were fixed on her unsteady mouth, this appearing to interest him more than anything else.

  'Please!' she whispered, feeling pinpricks all over. 'You're attracting attention!'

  'You're getting more than your share, dressed like that,' he said cuttingly. 'See it doesn't happen again.'

  Stormily, Alex jumped up, not looking at him once as they went to the dining room. He stalked silently beside her, but the air was heavy with things left unsaid. As she sat down she stared briefly at the headwaiter's eyebrows as he escorted them to a table. Mentally, she knew, they were about an inch above their natural position, as they observed her jeans.

  Oh, damn everybody! she thought, in an almost tearful rage of frustration. Why was everything going so wrong? All she'd ever done was fall in love with Chase.

  She was so busy trying to control her emotions, she failed to see Davina Wilde until she paused by Chase's chair.

  'I hope I'm not intruding?' Davina smiled sweetly at them both. I just had to stop and wish you well. I read about your engagement.'

  Chase stood up, smiling as Davina kissed him warmly. Was this all part of the congratulations? Alex wondered bitterly. Davina kissed her next a mere peck by comparison to the lingering passion she had bestowed on Chase.

  'Are you with anyone?' Chase asked, as she turned to him again.

  'I was supposed to be meeting my brother,' she laughed ruefully, 'but he's just sent word he can't make it. Actually, I was just leaving when I saw you and of course I couldn't go without saying hello. Now could I?' she pouted up at him charmingly.

  'Why not have lunch with us?' Chase asked, without consulting Alex.

  It seemed to Alex, in her growing despair, that Davina spent at least five minutes allowing herself to be persuaded, and Chase another five seeing her tenderly seated and supplied with drinks. Davina wasn't in the acting
profession for nothing, Alex decided, uncharitable thoughts racing through her mind. It seemed wholly unfair that Davina was so beautiful Chase never took his eyes off her.

  Bitterly Alex regretted her cotton jeans as she saw the elegant little dress the other girl was wearing.

  Davina's make-up, too, was perfection, as were the wonderful little curls and waves in her hair. Alex was sadly aware that all she had gained was a sense of neglect, which afforded her much misery and no satisfaction!

  Throughout the meal, which went on until she felt like screaming, she was ignored by the other two.

  They talked of people whom she had never met. Some she had heard of, but that was all. Davina sparkled and Chase responded with a charm of his own. When it was over, it seemed the final humiliation when he agreed to drop Davina at the TV. studios where she was working.

  Feeling too ill to think about it, Alex sat in the taxi Chase had called for her listening to him instructing the driver to take her home.

  'I'll give you a ring this evening some time,' he told her curtly, as the taxi drove off.

  Blindly she gazed out of the taxi window as they sped along. Sydney, with its ever-changing skyline, its surrounding parks, suburbs, rivers and coastline, flashed unseen before her eyes. Before she reached home she knew exactly what she was going to do. Her father was away at his conference, her mother out visiting friends. Quickly she ran upstairs and packed a case. Then, slipping off her ring, she wrapped it in a note she wrote, putting everything in a thick envelope which she addressed to Chase. This she left in a prominent place downstairs, with a note for her mother.

  Old Anna was having her usual afternoon nap, making it easy for Alex to leave unobserved. Without hesitation she made her way to the airport. Managing to catch a flight almost immediately, she was letting herself into the flat in Melbourne just over two hours later. She still had her key. Because of the excitement over Ruby's wedding the lease on the flat had been overlooked. No one, so far, had done anything about cancelling it. All Alex did was tell the woman next door she was back for a day or two, then she let herself in and closed the door.

  She must be the only thing that had changed, she thought unhappily, staring around, her back to the door. The flat was just as they had left it. She wouldn't be staying long only long enough to pack the few things she still had here and decide what to do. Perhaps she would go to Darwin, in the North.

  Chase wouldn't follow her. In the note she had left, she had made it very clear that everything was over between them. And from the way he had been attending to Davina, she had little doubt he would be grateful at having escaped an awkward situation with so little fuss.

  Trailing into the kitchen, she made herself a cup of tea. Then impatient of her continuing lethargy, she began determinedly to sort out her belongings. No time like the present, she assured herself sternly, but by nine she was so exhausted she couldn't go on. After a hot bath she would try to eat some supper, then go to bed. A good night's sleep might help her forget Chase. Surely she would feel better in the morning?

  As she got out of the bath the doorbell rang. It must be Mrs Brown from next door. She had promised to look in and see if Alex was all right. Alex hadn't thought it necessary, but couldn't bring herself to snub the woman. Sighing, she reached for her silky peignoir, pulling it on as she left the bathroom just in time to meet Chase striding over the hall.

  Never could she recall seeing his face so hard and white. As she halted, gasping, he snapped harshly.

  'Make yourself decent, then I'll hear your explanations. I'm sure you can think of something!'

  Too stunned by his sudden appearance and biting sarcasm to feel ashamed of her near nakedness, she grasped the sash of her peignoir tightly around her, closing the gap down the front. 'What on earth are you doing here?' she whispered, trembling.

  'Just searching for my fiancée,' he enlightened her. 'And you?'

  'I believe I made that quite clear,' she cried, then, to her horror, burst into tears.

  'Alex!' he began, then with a helpless groan he caught her slight body to him, gathering her so closely in his arms she could scarcely breathe. Oh, Alex, never run away like that again. I had no idea where you were. I could only hope you were here. I've been nearly out of my mind!'

  'But why?' she sobbed, clinging to him, suddenly as reluctant to leave him as he was to let her go. 'We have to face facts, Chase. It's not as if you loved me.'

  'If you only knew how much,' he said thickly, 'you might realise I can't take any more!'

  His eyes were bleak as he raised a hand to touch her wet cheek, watching her grimly. Then, as though he didn't trust himself to speak rationally with her so near, he pushed her from him into an armchair. You don't have to pretend you're glad to see me. You're upset, I suppose, because I followed you here, but I couldn't do anything else.'

  Her words almost incoherent, she stammered up at him as he leant harshly over her. I thought it was Davina…?'

  'No,' he said heavily. 'She means nothing to me. I was simply trying to make you jealous.' A kind of agony darkened his eyes as they glittered down at her. 'I know you couldn't care less, but there are times, Alex, when a man feels desperate.'

  Transfixed by his smouldering gaze, his barely controlled emotions, Alex was unable to speak. She had never guessed he felt this way. While she had been sitting there during lunch, feeling sorry for herself, he had been suffering too. If Chase loved her, as he said he did, he must have suffered a lot, as much as she had done. Maybe more. She could see it in the taut bones of his face.

  Clouding unhappily, her blue eyes pleaded with him. 'Oh, darling, I'm sorry,' she whispered, the tearing pain in her heart refusing to allow anything but the complete truth. I love you so much. If I hadn't been so swamped in self-pity I might have guessed you loved me too.'

  'How long have you cared?' Suddenly he was very close again, his hand shaking as it savagely curved her nape, tilting her face so he could see it clearly. 'How long?' he repeated hoarsely. I'm not sure…' She could barely think with his hands burning her like fire on her bare skin. Before you brought my mother to Coolabra. I think I realised how much you meant to me while you were away. I was going to tell you when you came back, but when I saw my mother I seemed to go into shock.' 'You hated me for that, didn't you?' he sighed tightly. 'I only brought her there because I was convinced, after meeting her, that your fears were exaggerated. I was trying to prove, without putting it in harmful words, that once you were married to me your fears would all disappear. I hoped you would have sufficient confidence in me to realise I could protect you from much worse than your mother. It wasn't until I saw your face that I knew my plans had been doomed from the start. You thought I'd asked her to Coolabra so she could bully you into marrying me.'

  Alex nodded with sudden shame. 'But something did make me stop feeling scared of her,' she confessed humbly. 'At least I managed to grow up that much. I don't think I'll ever take her so seriously again. We'll probably get on fine from now on.' 'That's fine,' Chase said grimly. 'And where does this leave me?'

  Bleakly she looked away from him. 'The…the misunderstanding between us wasn't altogether because of my mother. I still thought I bored you. .:'

  'Bored me?' His brows rose in astonishment. 'However did you come to believe that?' 'I overheard you saying so to Ruby. After the first time you took me out.' He blanched with surprise. Oh, God, Alex, not that!'

  His hand left her nape to rub ruefully over her shoulder, easing the tension from her. He sighed, as if searching for words. 'It was far from the truth. You intrigued me from the start. I said I'd been bored, simply to stop Ruby getting at you, which she might have done if she'd thought I was interested. My sister has a very sharp tongue, as you probably discovered for yourself. I said what I did to protect you, and because I didn't want you frightened off before I had a chance to really get to know you.' Suddenly his hand stilled and he stared at her, frowning. 'You thought you bored me, yet you agreed to come out with me again. Why
?'

  'That was why,' she explained sombrely. 'I meant to have revenge by wasting your time. I was determined I wouldn't go to Coolabra, as you wanted me to, because of Ruby, but I decided I wouldn't tell you that straight away. I suppose my pride was hurt because of what you'd id and I decided. to string you along, as they say.'

  'As they say. You little devil!' he exclaimed wryly, his mouth quirking. 'You certainly did that, and I can't deny you gave me some bad moments. You refused outright to do as I asked, then just as suddenly changed your mind?'

  Uncertainly, Alex flushed. 'That was because my mother threatened to come to Melbourne with Don Fisher.'

  Chase nodded grimly. 'So you fled then I confused you even further by asking you to marry me.' 'You were so high handed about it, I couldn't believe you loved me…'

  'I wish I'd been as convinced.' His face was suddenly haggard as his eyes went broodingly over her. 'I decided it was time I married time to think of future heirs. Anything to avoid facing the truth that I was falling desperately in love with you. You see,' he confessed dryly, 'I've become something of an expert at surviving devastating experiences, but I'd never had to cope with anything like that.'

  'I would have told you I loved you, if I'd known you loved me,' Alex faltered accusingly, her eyes tearful again as she thought of the time they had wasted, all the terrible agony.

  Chase's smile was teasing but still held a hint of grimness, as he drew her up beside him. 'I think it might be a case of the pot calling the kettle black, my darling.' He put his hands to her face, shaping it tenderly, his eyes strangely pleading. 'I have to ask your forgiveness, though. I tried to force you to do as I asked, and it didn't work. The night of the plane crash I dared not come near you. My control was nearly gone. I hadn't planned that crash, you know. I would never do anything so irresponsible, but I'd told them at Coolabra I expected to come back engaged to you, and I felt guilty. All the same,' he said, thickly, I couldn't leave you alone. The next morning, if Drew hadn't arrived when he did, you realise what would have happened?'