‘You know, urchin, you have the most beautiful body.’
She pulled away from him. ‘Don’t let me keep you from your work,’ she said pointedly.
His eyes drawing into a frown, Rhys watched her as she pulled on a dress. ‘You’re behaving extremely childishly, Alix. The team need my advice. You know the project in Lithuania is at crisis point.’
‘Is it? Is that why you left it till the very last minute to get back for the wedding? I wonder you were able to tear yourself away! I also wonder if there really was a problem with the plane, or whether you just invented it as an excuse for staying on yet another day.’
Rhys’s mouth hardened. ‘You’re being ridiculous. Admittedly I wouldn’t have chosen this time for the wedding if I’d been consulted. This project is important to me, and the company. But you wheedled Todd into taking me off it, so I went along with that. There was little choice. But don’t expect me not to worry about it. You can’t just switch off a very important part of your life, Alix.’
‘No, you obviously can’t. And it’s equally obvious that I definitely take second place to your work.’
‘Now, that really is ridiculous. You’re my wife, Alix—of course you come first.’ He smiled, reached out and caught her wrist, drew her to him and put his arms round her, still holding her wrist, imprisoning her arms behind her. ‘I’m sorry, urchin,’ he breathed as he kissed her throat. ‘That phone rang at just the wrong moment, didn’t it? I loved what we were doing. Was it good for you, too?’
His lips were sensuous against her skin, caught her earlobe, tugged at it gently. She sighed, relaxed, and closed her eyes for a moment. His grip tightened and she opened her eyes in time to see a gleam of triumph in Rhys’s. It was quickly gone, as he said, ‘We must try it again tonight, when we’ll be sure not to be interrupted.’ He began to kiss her lips in tantalising little kisses. ‘Would you like that, urchin? You’re such a good pupil—and there’s so much I want to teach you.’
He lifted his head to look at her, waiting for her answer, confident of the reply, but she disconcerted him by saying, ‘Do you love me, Rhys?’
She watched him eagerly, saw his eyebrows flicker. With a small laugh he said, ‘Dearest, urchin—haven’t I made you my wife?’
It might have been answer enough for him, but to Alix it was no answer at all, not when her mind had been poisoned by Lynette. She had wanted reassurance but had found only prevarication. Moving away from him, she said, ‘I’m starving hungry. Where are we going to eat tonight?’
‘In the hotel, I should think. I doubt if there will be many other places open on a Sunday evening.’ He gave her one of his lazy smiles. ‘You always did have a healthy appetite.’ Taking her hand again he raised it to his lips to kiss. ‘Have you forgiven me, urchin? It was disappointing for me, too, you know.’
She managed to smile in return. ‘Yes, of course. When do they start serving dinner?’
Rhys laughed and hugged her. ‘That’s my girl.’ He ran a hand over his chin. ‘Now that you’ve at last come out of the bathroom, I’d better shave.’
He did so, put on a suit, and they went down to dinner. Rhys ordered champagne to drink with the meal.
‘How extravagant,’ Alix remarked.
‘You only ever have one honeymoon—and it’s going to be champagne all the way,’ Rhys said with a grin. ‘Nothing is too good for my lovely wife.’
Heady words and heady wine. Both should have gone to Alix’s head, but both fell flat. But she tried to be bright and happy, because he was still Rhys and she still loved him, but there was a strangely cold feeling inside her that no amount of trying would dispel. Perhaps Rhys sensed it, because he was wonderful during that meal, attentive, devastatingly charming, setting out to amuse and captivate her, far more than he had ever done before. And he could do it, too; soon he had her laughing and wildly, hopefully, thinking that maybe she’d been making a fuss over very little. Alix also thought that defying him might have shaken Rhys a little, which seemed to be proved when, near the end of the meal, he reached across the table to take her hands in his, leaned forward and said, his eyes suggestive, ‘Telling me to go to hell, indeed! My own wife! You deserve to be taken across my knee and spanked for that.’
She looked into his eyes and knew exactly what he was thinking. Alix’s heart thumped with excited anticipation, and she longed to be in bed with him again, in his arms, making love. It must have showed in her face, because Rhys smiled and kissed the tips of her fingers, his eyes, so warm and evocative, holding hers.
The waiter came up and Alix drew back, her face flushing. Rhys wasn’t embarrassed at all, only letting go of her hands when she pulled away, and turning a calm face to the waiter.
‘Mr Stirling, there’s a telephone call for you, sir.’
‘Thanks. I’ll take it up in my suite.’ He turned to Alix whose face had tensed and waved an admonishing finger at her. ‘Now don’t go thinking this is work. My father promised to phone to confirm our honeymoon flight times. I’m arranging to meet him at the airport so he can take my car back home for me; it needs some work done on it while we’re away.’ He rose. ‘Be back shortly.’
Alix sat alone for a few minutes, then it occurred to her that she wanted to ask about the photos that had been taken at the wedding. Perhaps Rhys’s father could bring them to the airport with him so that she could see them. She ran upstairs to the suite, then remembered that Rhys had the key, but she had the one to the bedroom, so she went in that way, not bothering to turn on the light. The door between the two rooms was ajar and she could hear Rhys speaking.
‘Look, there’s only one thing for it,’ he was saying. ‘I’ll have to come back and deal with the problems myself. Yes, I know, but it will only mean postponing our honeymoon trip for a few days until I’ve sorted it out, then you’ll be able to handle the rest of it yourself. I can’t come tonight, though; it will have to be tomorrow if I can manage it. If not, definitely the day after. Get the meetings lined up for me, will you? Whatever happens I’m determined to see this project through.’
He said goodbye, put the phone down, then turned as she opened the door and came into the room.
Her face very white and tense, Alix said, ‘No! I won’t let you go.’
Rhys’s jaw hardened. ‘I’m sorry, Alix. Please try to understand. I have to go back. It will only——’
‘How can you even contemplate leaving me when we’re on our honeymoon?’ she cried, her heart breaking.
He moved towards her. ‘Alix, sweetheart, I know it’s a hell of a time, but it will only be for a few days and then I’ll be entirely yours. I promise. I——’
He went to reach out for her but she backed away. ‘No! Don’t touch me!’ She stared at him, feeling ice take over the warmth of her heart. ‘All right. All right, then go. But don’t expect me to be around when you get back. If you walk out on me now, then our marriage is over!’
CHAPTER SIX
RHYS laughed, not taking her seriously. But that was a mistake, because Alix had never been more serious about anything in her life. Coming up to her, he took hold of her arms and said with all his persuasive charm, ‘I know you’re disappointed; so am I. But I’m afraid it just can’t be helped, urchin. I’ll take you home tomorrow and be back before you know it.’
‘You’re right, I won’t know it—because I won’t be there,’ she said, her mouth set into a cold, unhappy line.
He frowned. ‘I’m not doing this on purpose, Alix. If you hadn’t persuaded Todd to take me off this project I——’
‘I didn’t,’ she interrupted. ‘It was his idea. He said he’d go to Lithuania himself if necessary.’ Her lip curled. ‘He actually thought you wanted to get married, that you wanted time for a honeymoon. It seems he and I were both wrong!’
‘Of course I wanted to get married,’ Rhys said roughly.
‘Really? Or was it because it was a condition of you taking over Todd’s job?’
The question came out so unexpectedl
y, so bluntly, that Rhys wasn’t able to hide the fleeting flash of consternation that came into his eyes. He covered it, but not quite quickly enough. Alix felt something die inside her: her innocence, her belief in love.
‘Rubbish! What on earth gave you that idea?’ Rhys demanded, his voice forceful.
She didn’t answer, just pulled free and walked into the bedroom. The suitcases were stacked on a rack in the corner. Alix pulled Rhys’s off and threw it on to the bed. ‘What are you waiting for?’ she said curtly. ‘If you hurry you can get there in the company plane tonight. Here, I’ll help you.’ And going to the wardrobe she began to pull his clothes out and throw them on the suitcase.
Rhys strode round to her and gripped her wrists. ‘Alix, stop this! All right, I know how devastated you are. But I swear I’ll make it up to you. And I don’t have to go now. We can have tonight together. Go to bed now, this minute. We can make love all night.’ He gave a soft laugh and tried to kiss her neck. ‘You’ll be so sated with love that you’ll be glad to get rid of me.’
In a great surge of cold fury, Alix pushed him away. ‘Go to bed with you?’ she said contemptuously. ‘I’d rather die!’
He stared at her, brought up short by the disgust in her face. ‘Urchin, I——’
But she had walked over to the phone, picked it up, and said to the receptionist, ‘Would you please call a taxi to take Mr Stirling to the airport? And have his bill made up, please; he’ll be checking out immediately. Yes, I’ll be leaving, too. Thank you.’
As soon as she put the phone down, Rhys, his mouth tight, said, ‘Alix, please try to calm down. I know you’re upset but——’
‘On the contrary,’ she said shortly. ‘I’m perfectly calm. Well, what are you waiting for? Why don’t you pack? Are you thinking that that’s part of a wife’s duties? Pity—because you haven’t got one any more!’
‘Alix, this is crazy.’ Catching hold of her arms as she went to stride past him, Rhys looked down at her, his eyes angry and his mouth drawn into a hard line. ‘All right, you’ve made your point. I thought that working for the company would make you understand how important the project is to me, but you obviously don’t—and you’re damn well not going to try to understand. So, OK. You win. You’re right and our honeymoon should take precedence over everything else. I’ve got my priorities wrong. So I’ll phone Todd and get him to go out to Vilnius in my place. We’ll go on with our honeymoon as we planned.’
He looked at her expectantly. Expecting what? she wondered. For her to smile and throw herself in his arms, completely happy again. For everything to be as it was before, except that he would be bearing a grudge, playing the martyr, for the rest of their honeymoon, for the rest of their lives! Picking up her own case, Alix began to toss things into it, the beautiful new clothes, all thrown in haphazardly. ‘You can do what you like,’ she said curtly. ‘I’m leaving.’
‘No, you’re not. I won’t let you.’
Alix laughed stridently. ‘It’s too late for the possessive husband bit. You just proved that you couldn’t care less.’
‘That isn’t true, Alix.’ Rhys tried to catch hold of her again, but she turned round with such blazing anger in her eyes that he drew back, his own eyes startled. But he said forcefully, ‘I mean it, Alix. I do care about you; you know that.’
‘Care?’ She paused, a dress on a hanger in her hands as she considered the word. ‘Yes, I believe you do care for me.’
‘Well, then?’
But she went on, ‘I think you care for me because I’ve always been around, and you married me because you thought you could mould me into the obedient sort of wife you wanted: someone who wouldn’t mind you going off during the honeymoon, for example. And if I thought you really loved me, then maybe I wouldn’t mind. Maybe I’d understand. But you don’t love me. You don’t even know what love means. And I’m not going to stick around just to be used by you, to be kept sweet by sex, the way I’ve been kept sweet by kisses for the last eighteen months. I’ve grown up, Rhys. I see through you. So go to Vilnius. Go any place you damn well want. You’ve got what you wanted—a wife so you can take over Todd’s job. You’ve got a marriage licence and a stack of wedding photos to prove it.’ She drew herself up, chin high. ‘But that’s all you’ve got. Because I won’t be around any more.’
Rhys was gazing at her, a strange, punch-drunk sort of look in his eyes. ‘Alix?’ He said her name on a hoarse, questioning note, almost as if he couldn’t believe it was her.
The phone rang.
‘That will be your taxi. You don’t want to keep it waiting.’ Alix flung the last of her things into her case and shut it. Picking up her bag and the car keys, she said, ‘I’ll give the keys back to your father. Goodbye, Rhys. I hope your project goes well for you.’
She turned towards the door, but he seemed to come back to life and caught hold of her. ‘No, I’m not going to let you go like this. Alix, we have to talk. We have to——’
‘The only thing I want to talk to you about is a divorce!’ And she strode out of the door while Rhys was still standing staring at her with stunned disbelief in his face.
* * *
The car enclosed her. It was warm and comforting like a cocoon. Alix could well understand how people who committed suicide chose to do so in their cars; it was almost like going full circle, from one womb to another. She had been driving a long time and her eyes were aching with tiredness. She had absolutely no idea where she was, had just kept driving. Soon, she realised, she would be too tired to go on and would have to find somewhere to stop, but almost immediately fate made the decision for her because the car engine sputtered and gradually died as it ran out of petrol. Alix steered it on to the grass verge at the side of the road and turned off the ignition. It was a quiet, unlit road, with trees on either side. Alix got into the back seat, locked the doors, and curled up as best she could, then gave way at last to tears, crying for all those years of dreams that had so soon turned into a nightmare.
Daylight finally woke her from a restless, troubled sleep. Her dress, the one she’d put on to have dinner with Rhys last night, was terribly crumpled and looked completely out of place. Getting her suitcase out of the boot, Alix found trousers, a shirt and a sweater, a pair of trainers to take the place of her high heels, and went behind a bush to change into them. She went to brush her hair but found that she’d left all her make-up stuff behind in the bathroom at the hotel. Well, at least she’d remembered to bring her handbag; she’d be able to buy some more. But first she’d have to get some petrol for the car. Cleaning up her face as best she could, she began to walk down the road.
The nearest village was over three miles away. Alix walked down the hill towards its centre and paused, enraptured by the scene despite all her problems. There was a village green with a pond that was the home to a great many ducks, a pair of ancient stocks black with age, an old church, pretty stone houses, two or three bow-fronted shops, one of which advertised cream teas and morning coffee. The thought of coffee created an immediate longing for it. But it was early yet, the village only just awakening.
Across the other side of the village green a milk float appeared, jangling along. Alix walked over to it and waited till the milkman came up with his hands full of empties. ‘Excuse me.’
‘Morning, miss.’
‘Is there a garage in the village, please. Somewhere I can get some petrol?’
‘Yes, just down the side road there.’ The milkman glanced at his watch. ‘But you’re too early yet; it doesn’t open till eight. Run out of petrol, have you?’
Alix nodded. ‘I’ll sit on the seat over there and wait. Thanks for your help.’
The milkman went on with his round, came to the teashop where a woman opened the door to him. He stood talking to her for a few minutes, then turned and called out to Alix, beckoning her over.
‘We thought you might like a cup of tea while you’re waiting,’ the woman said with a smile.
Alix accepted gratefully, in su
ch an emotional state that she was almost moved to tears by their kindness. She sat in the café by the window, only half listening as the woman chatted to her while she got the place ready for the day, telling her what a busy weekend they’d had. ‘And us short-handed, too. One of my girls has sprained her wrist; it’ll be another three weeks before she can come back to work. And I can’t find anyone to take her place—young girls don’t want to work in a little village like this, they all want to be off to offices in the town. But you can’t blame them, really,’ she added large-mindedly. ‘They have all the shops to go round in the town. We get lots of sightseers here, because it’s so pretty, but there’s nothing for the youngsters.’
The woman insisted on giving her a sandwich to eat, but Alix had to force it down, her appetite gone. When she’d finished she went into the ladies room to wash her face and comb her hair with her fingers, then insisted, in turn, on paying for the food. The garage was open and the proprietor let her have a can of petrol, but apologetically said he couldn’t run her back to her car as he was expecting a couple of customers to arrive shortly and he had no one with him.
Feeling a little better after the food, Alix began the long walk back to the car, and it was only now that she began to think about the future. But it was all too raw and painful for her to make any important decisions; all she knew was that she wanted to hide away somewhere for a while to lick her wounds, to give herself time to recover a little so that she could think clearly. Reaching the car, Alix put in the petrol, then drove back to the village to return the can. Again she was struck by what a peaceful place it looked, then remembered that the woman at the tea-rooms needed an assistant for three weeks, almost exactly the time Alix had off work for her honeymoon.
To Have And To Hold (Mills & Boon Vintage 90s Modern) Page 11