—Kragash
Diary entry #20A:
I almost forgot to mention the android.
We have awkward, clunky robots doing menial jobs on our farms and in our factories, and of course we ship them to all our colonies—but not one of them, not even the most advanced model, can be trusted with even the most menial duties aboard a military ship.
But third in command to the Picard thing is an android named Data, human to all appearances, fully capable of interacting physically and mentally as an equal with the living crew members.
There is only one conclusion to be drawn: their science, based on their cloaking mechanisms, their multi-dimensional mastery, and their creation of the highly intelligent and physically graceful Data thing, is far in advance of our own.
How could such a superpower remain hidden from the rest of the galaxy?
And how are we ever to defeat it?
—Kragash
From the Washington Post, February 7, 2012:
The rogue asteroid that appears to be on a collision course with Earth is just now passing the orbit of Mars. The military is still considering its few remaining options for obliterating or diverting it, but thus far has not come up with a viable option. For up-to-the-minute details please check our website at . . .
From Commander Braque:
This is most disconcerting news, Kragash. Still, I have the utmost confidence in our fighting forces. If we could win the Battle of Maratino V and effect that remarkable escape when we were surrounded and far outnumbered in the Djambi system, I believe we can hold our own against any military force in the galaxy.
You have forwarded the transmission of the Enterprise in action, and our best scientific and military minds are analyzing it, searching for weak spots (which I assume will exist throughout the fleet, even if it contains ships other than the many clones/versions/whatever of the Enterprise.)
My advice to you is that you leave that aspect of the war to us, and see what other potential trouble spots we need to be made aware of.
From Kragash:
Am I to understand that we still plan to attack?
From Commander Braque:
The asteroid is hurtling toward the Earth. Why in the world would I make any effort to stop it? You’ve discovered their starfaring fleet. Our experts will study it, find its weaknesses, and exploit them. Your job now is to determine if there are any more unforeseen obstacles awaiting us, or indeed, if there is any good reason not to destroy all life on the planet.
From Kragash:
I will do so as long as they permit me to. I can’t believe that with their advanced technology they are not aware of my presence. Has it occurred to you, sir, that they could be studying me while I am studying them?
From Commander Braque:
Just do it, Kragash.
Diary entry #21:
I have been observing what the inhabitants do for pleasure, and I am appalled. Their games are violent beyond belief. There is a game known as “football”, in which two sides line up opposite each other and, at a given signal, leap forward and meet in battle. Rarely does the battle last for more than a few seconds, but they hold more than one hundred such battles in barely half of an afternoon.
Then there is another game, also called “football,” and, alternatively, “soccer,” in which men race around the floor of an amphitheater kicking a small, round, totally defenseless animal, and at some point thousands of people who have been watching from the most uncomfortable benches imaginable race onto the stadium floor and indulge in a brutal bloodletting.
Then there is “wrestling,” also called “rasslin’,” where small numbers of incredibly muscular beings throw each other around a small enclosure, bite and gouge and kick each other, throw chairs and other objects at each other—and yet such are the recuperative powers of this race that at the end of the demonstration none of the parties seems any the worse for wear.
Should I report this to Commander Braque? I have a feeling that he won’t believe me; I can barely believe what I saw myself. I expect that his response will be that whatever their physical abilities, if we meet them in battle they will be enclosed in their Enterprises and thus we have no need to worry about their physical attributes.
And yet, if I do not report it, and we should ever come face-to-face with these creatures while plundering their planet and preparing it for our colonists, we must be ready.
I think I must tell him what to expect.
—Kragash
From Commander Braque:
All right, they’re a remarkable race, no question about it. But you overestimate their ability to do damage. Every last one of them will perish when the asteroid hits their world. Show me that they are invulnerable to our laser and sonic weapons, and then I’ll start to worry about them.
Diary entry #22:
I am so glad I remained at my post and continued my observations. The Enterprises are nothing. They are merely starships, fast and deadly to be sure, capable of cruising at many times the speed of light, armed and armored, with truly awesome captains, but when all is said and done, they are just ships, and our military has defeated every type of ship we have faced.
But what I have learned from today’s transmission puts a whole new light on things.
We are not the first to attempt to conquer this race. It turns out that before we even considered conquering and colonizing the worlds of the Spiral Arm, there was already an Emperor. He claimed to be a galactic emperor, but our historians could not have missed such a thing on a galactic scale, so I must assume that he operated solely within the Arm.
I have been watching what I assume is historical footage of the downfall of this civilization. The Emperor’s top general was a human or humanoid whose name seemed to translate as Dark Invader, though my universal translating mechanism is a bit unsure of the accuracy of its conclusion.
It makes no difference, because I am not concerned with names. This empire was brought down not by weaponry, not by a superior military, but by something intangible, something known only as The Force. It seems to be a unique mental weapon, possessed by only a handful of warriors, and it wields a power so great that I do not believe there is any known way of measuring it. In the bluntest possible terms, one Skywalker—the generic name for those possessing this Force—can conceivably wish or think our entire fleet into non-existence.
We can fight the Enterprises. We can possibly grapple hand-to-hand with footballers and rasslers. But how does one go to war against a thought so powerful that it can blink you out of existence in a fraction of a nanosecond?
I must report this to the Commander immediately!
—Kragash
From Commander Braque:
Are you quite sure? I mean, we have conquered more than one hundred races — bipeds, quadrupeds, oxygen breathers, chlorine breathers, methane breathers; you name it, we’ve pacified it — but I have never heard of a race with the mental/telepathic powers you claim this race possesses.
From Kragash:
You are misunderstanding me, sir. I did not say that the entire race has these powers. Only a very small percentage does—but that very small percentage was quite enough to overthrow the military machine of the galactic emperor in the historical footage I just finished studying.
Nor, I must point out, is this power limited to the inhabitants of Earth. Just as the Kirk thing had an ally from Vulcan, the Skywalker has partnered with some creature of a race known as the Yodas. Earth has so many alliances, I don’t know how it could have escaped our notice, unless they used the Force to blind us to their presence.
From Commander Braque:
Do you think this Force is powerful enough to deflect the asteroid that we have set on a collision course with Earth?
From Kragash:
I truly do not know, sir.
From Commander Braque:
I guess we—and they—will find out, won’t we?
From the Paris Match, February 10, 2012
Th
e military is remaining tight-lipped and noncommittal, but inside sources have stated (off the record, of course) that we probably do not have the capability to either destroy the asteroid or divert it. It is now up to the Americans, the Russians and the Chinese. If they cannot come up with a solution to the problem, then all life on Earth —in fact, Earth itself—will be destroyed in a matter of 53 days.
Also: 6 new ways to prepare snails: see Page 17.
Diary entry #25:
I have spent two full days watching the Skywalkers and their lackeys, the Solos, apply the Force, and I still can find no flaws or weakness in this startling weapon. Therefore, this evening I have moved on to other things, and will study an historical documentary confined to the Earth itself.
—Kragash
Diary entry #26:
The more I learn about this race, the more I wonder why we are not all their vassals, speaking Terran and looking to them for orders.
Last night’s historical was about . . . well, it is difficult to define exactly what it was about. It had something to do with a Matrix, which seems to be vaguely related to The Force.
But my latest discovery has nothing to do with that. We already knew about The Force, and the Matrix is just another version of it.
I remember the shock and surprise I experienced when I found out that the Picard thing had a fully-functioning incredibly competent android working in a position of authority on its Enterprise. Well, that android is nothing compared to what I learned last night.
This race, these Earthlings whom no one has ever even heard of before, has somehow discovered the secret to creating living computer programs (or Agent Smiths, as they are known). Physically identical to the planetary inhabitants, these Smiths are immune to pain and are virtually indestructible. Their cerebral functions are as fast and accurate as one of our Class X34 plasma computers. They are, in short, super beings (if one can call them beings at all). Between the Smiths and the Datas, I am becoming convinced that when we finally clash head-on with the military of Earth in the final confrontation, as now seems inevitable, what our soldiers will be facing will be not warriors of flesh and blood, but incredibly sophisticated androids and computer programs in human form.
Now that I think of it, even the Skywalker had robot vassals, primitive compared to the Datas and Smiths, but indicative of the fact that all inhabitants of Earth have humanoid creations to fight their wars and do their menial chores.
Dare I report this latest discovery to the Commander?
On the other hand, dare I not?
— Kragash
From Commander Braque:
Computer programs in bipedal form, indis-tinguishable from the native inhabitants? Have you been taking your medications on schedule, Kragash? I find this all but impossible to believe.
From Kragash:
I can capture and forward the operative transmissions to you, sir.
From Commander Braque:
I think you’d better.
From Kragash:
Sending . . .
From Commander Braque:
I’m sorry to have taken so long studying the transmissions, and I apologize for ever doubting you, Kragash. How did this race and its scientific achievements remain unknown and undiscovered for so long?
We need more information, and we need it now. You’ve sent me enough about the military and on scientific creations. Now I need to know what the average, everyday inhabitant is like.
Always assuming that somewhere on this world there is an average inhabitant . . .
Diary entry #28:
Well, at least the inhabitants in the documentary I have captured seem normal. I might even call them harmless. They plant their fields, they care for their animals, they gather in small villages, they show no sign of the awesome powers I have been studying in recent days.
In fact, if I were to use a single word to describe their society, I would call it primitive. This is a society protected by Enterprises and androids and this indefinable Force, yet these people use quadrupeds and buggies for transportation, and although we know they have armed their ships with laser cannons and pulse torpedoes, the citizenry seems to prefer swords, difficult as that may be to believe.
So tranquil is their daily life, so simple, that I find myself wondering if a number of humanoid races actually share the planet—the Skywalkers and Picards and Kirks on the one hand, and these gentle beings on the other. It is quite a dichotomy, to say the least.
—Kragash
Diary entry #28A:
I spoke too soon. These people are nothing but livestock, kept alive solely to provide food for a far more powerful race. I kept thinking of them as humans, but I was mistaken. Closer study of the transmission informs me that, far from being humans, they are something called Transylvanians. The absolute master of this extensive farm, and of these animals, is the Drag-You-La. He is physically unimpressive, he clearly has need of a dental hygenicist, and he wears no weapon at all. Why do the animals—the Transylvanians—not revolt?
—Kragash
Diary entry #28B:
What kind of world is this???
Not ten minutes ago I asked why the animals did not revolt. Now I know.
The Drag-You-La has the ability to morph into a small, black, winged creature, and in this form he can fly, climb the smooth vertical walls of buildings, and change back into his original shape at will.
Not only that, but in either form—the humanoid or the winged creature—his sole diet is the blood of the Transylvanians that he clearly breeds and keeps for that purpose and no other.
If this is what is waiting for us if we actually conquer the Enterprises—excuse me: I meant when we conquer them, of course—I wonder if we’ll be able to resist the Drag-You-Las any more than the poor Transylvanians can.
—Kragash
Diary entry #29:
Immediately after the transmission I previously described there was another, similar in all meaningful ways, except that this time the owner of the humanoid livestock was Nosferatu. My comprehension of the various Terran dialects is still lacking, but I get the distinct impression that Nosferatu is a race rather than an individual. This world possesses the most unnerving food chain I have ever encountered.
—Kragash
From Commander Braque:
I think you’re looking at this all wrong, Kragash. If this humanoid race, these Transylvanians, are food animals, our colonists won’t have to bring their own supplies but can live off the land — well, off the Transylvanians – once we have conquered the planet.
Clearly you haven’t thought this through.
From Kragash:
You’re missing the point, Commander. You are concentrating on the Transylvanians, whereas I am warning you that two entire species—the Drag-You-Las and the Nosferatus—have the ability to transform themselves from large bipeds to very small flying animals. You couldn’t ask for a better spy than a humanoid who can morph into a small flying creature on no more than a second’s notice and fly to safety.
From Commander Braque:
Ah! I see what you mean, Kragash. This will take further thought and planning. Can you transmit an image of this Drag-You-La?
From Kragash:
Here it is, sir. Note the misshapen teeth, which seems to be one of the two ways to determine if the biped is a Drag-You-La. (The other, of course, is the black cape.)
From Commander Braque:
Amazing! Just what are we up against here, I wonder? First the Kirk things, then the Vulcans and androids, then the Force, then the living computer programs, and now a race of shape-changers. Why have they not attacked and conquered us, I wonder?
Diary entry #32:
There have been no surprises for the last three revolutions of the planet on its axis, for which I am incredibly grateful. I have been studying the flora and fauna, and am starting to feel comfortable identifying the various members of each.
One thing troubles me. This morning there was a transmission,
clearly meant to indoctrinate the very young. Men wore very bizarre make-up, and everybody seemed to be in a hurry but their destination was never defined, and then I saw one more disconcerting thing. A small member of the quadruped species known as Elephant had abnormally long auditory appendages (known as “ears”). At one point it began flapping them, and suddenly it actually began flying! It used its ears as a power source, and also as external gyroscopes. It is known as the Dumbo, and while it seems harmless enough, I estimate that the average adult Dumbo can weigh well over 10,000 pounds.
One more thing to worry about.
—Kragash
From the London Times, February 18, 2012:
NASA reported this evening that mankind’s first attempt to divert or destroy the rogue asteroid that is bearing down upon the Earth was a failure when the ship’s second stage failed to ignite. Another attempt will take place on February 23.
Beyond the Sun Page 30