Memoir in the Making: A May-December Romance

by Adrian J. Smith

  Then Meredith's tongue touched her and any rational thought she had was out the window. She clenched her fingers into the sheets on each side of her body, not wanting to pull at Meredith's hair like Meredith had done to her. She bucked her hips up when Meredith found the exact angle to get her off even more quickly than she had the first time. Ainsley clenched her teeth and breathed hard, holding back as long as she could. When she came, Meredith continued to taste her, her tongue moving in every which direction, inciting and calming her body at the same time. Ainsley raised her leg over Meredith's head and turned onto her stomach, gasping for air.

  "Enough for now," she rasped out.

  Meredith crawled up Ainsley's body, resting half on it and half on the bed. She wore a shit-eating grin when Ainsley turned to look at her, finally feeling as though she had her body somewhat under control.

  "Are you trying to kill me by orgasm?" Ainsley asked.

  "Perhaps. It wouldn't be that bad a death, would it?"

  "No," Ainsley said and leaned in to kiss Meredith quickly. "But I would like a few minutes to enjoy it more."

  "Anything you need," Meredith said and ran her fingers up and down Ainsley's back, soothing her.

  Ainsley took the time to center herself again. She had no idea it could feel like that. Either it was because she'd been without sex for so long or it was because there was a much deeper emotional element in her time spent with Meredith. She didn't know, and she didn't really care to analyze it just yet. She rolled onto her back and dragged Meredith with her, trying to get the covers with her toes. Giving up, she sat up and leaned down, dragging the blankets over their cooling bodies.

  "I don't know about you, but I'm still tired. I vote for more sleep and more of this later."

  "Good idea," Meredith said, kissing Ainsley's chest before settling down against her side. Ainsley would be deep in slumber before she heard Meredith anywhere near sleep. But she didn't care, she had Meredith in her arms and they had taken another step further in their relationship.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Ainsley rapped her knuckles against Meredith’s office door and held her breath. She’d spent every moment with Meredith until Sunday morning when they parted ways. Since then, Ainsley hadn’t seen nor heard from Meredith, but she knew better than to doubt herself. Meredith was with Sam, at least until Monday night when she was home. They’d talked about it before Ainsley had left.

  Shivering despite the warmth of the building, Ainsley watched Meredith turn around in her desk chair and grin as Ainsley gave her a quick wave. Ainsley’s body warmed with just one look from Meredith, and she knew she was in for the long haul. No matter what Meredith wanted or needed, she would do it in an instant.

  After class had ended, Ainsley had gone to lunch with Adam and had been bursting at the seams to tell him what had happened, but she couldn’t just yet. For that day and probably for most of that week, she wanted to keep her relationship with Meredith as much of a secret as possible, just to let it linger with her. Swallowing, Ainsley stepped into Meredith’s office and shut the door behind her as had become her habit.

  Meredith had handed back papers earlier that afternoon, and as expected, Ainsley had aced it. She sat on the wooden chair with nothing but Meredith on her mind. Pulling her feet up to hang from the bottom rung, Ainsley leaned forward with her elbows on her knees and her chin in her hands.

  “How’s Sam?”

  Heaving a sigh, Meredith flicked her hair behind her shoulder and leaned back in her chair, her glasses perched on her nose, making her eyes look bigger than normal. “As well as can be expected.”

  “He coming back to work soon?”

  “I don’t know. He gets three weeks bereavement, but he might just take the rest of the semester. I wish he would come back to teach at least and skip the rest of the drama.”

  Ainsley lowered her gaze, skimming it up and down Meredith’s body and remembering every time she had touched it. “Why’s that?”

  “It would give him something to do, something to focus on other than his own grief. Not that it’s bad for him to focus on it, but he does have to figure out how to live with it soon enough. It’s not like we didn’t know this day was coming, but he seemed so unprepared for it. I just don’t know what he did the last year since Jeremy was diagnosed.”

  Ainsley pursed her lip and closed her eyes briefly, wanting to focus on Sam instead of Meredith for a moment. “Even if he did come back, I doubt he would be his normal self in the classroom.”

  “I agree, but he won’t ever be his normal self again. He needs to relearn who he is.”

  Nodding, Ainsley shifted in her seat so she could rest her back against the hard wood of it. She had news to tell Meredith, which had been her purpose in coming to see her, but she didn’t want to tell her right away—she wanted to build up to it.

  “It’s a good thing he has you. Not everyone has such a good friend.”

  “Not everyone has been shunned by their family either.”

  “True. True.” Ainsley paused, giving each statement weight before continuing. “And how are you holding up?”

  “Much better since this weekend.” Meredith smiled, a twinkle hitting her eye and a blush entering her cheeks.

  Ainsley grinned, glad to know she wasn’t the only one in the room who had spent many hours afterward thinking about exactly what had happened. She put her hands together and rubbed her left thumb over the top of her right one, looking at the ground. “Then perhaps we should do it again, sometime soon.”

  “Perhaps we should,” Meredith agreed.

  Tingles ran down Ainsley’s spine and into her core. She cursed herself and shook her head. Even her body wouldn’t give her a moment’s respite.

  “What?” Meredith asked.

  Ainsley flushed, and then she looked up and met Meredith’s curious look with a fiery one of her own. If she didn’t think Meredith would have a heart attack, she would walk over and kiss that look off her face right then and there. Ainsley shook her head again.

  “Even in here I can’t stop thinking about you. I really should be able to do that at least at some point during the week, don’t you think?”

  Meredith’s eyes lit up. Ainsley wanted to reach out and kiss her then like she hadn’t ever before. She wanted a confirmation of what she was feeling. Meredith lowered her gaze as she smiled, her eyes crinkling in the corners as her eyelids closed.

  “That’s flattering and very true on my part as well.”

  “What is?”

  Meredith lowered her voice. “I can’t stop thinking about you, Ainsley. Even though I try hard sometimes, I can’t. It’s not normal for me, although I’m pleased to say, I’m adjusting to it quickly.”

  “Good,” Ainsley said. “Me too. But I didn’t come in here just to check up with you.”

  “Oh?”

  “I have some news,” Ainsley said. She clapped her hands together and straightened her back, drawing out the moment as long as she possibly could. “I got a phone call yesterday that I’d like to share with you.”

  “Go on,” Meredith said, pulling her foot up to rest under her body in the chair. She leaned back and crossed her arms over her chest as she waited.

  Ainsley held onto the moment and then gave in. She stood up and walked the three strides to Meredith’s chair and put both her hands on the armrest. Tilting the chair back with a devilish grin on her face, she kissed Meredith. She wanted to celebrate before celebrating. Her tongue slipped out and along Meredith’s lips before Meredith opened her mouth and raised her hands to Ainsley’s cheeks.

  They kissed, Ainsley falling into the embrace with everything she had. She was beyond glad Meredith’s office had no windows to speak of as she continued to tease Meredith’s tongue with her own. Meredith’s breath hitched, and Ainsley glided one hand up to her cheek and then her neck. She had to make herself stop otherwise they would christen the desk.

  Pulling back second by second, Ainsley relaxed and stood up straight, keepin
g one hand in Meredith’s as she grinned. Meredith wiped two fingers under her bottom lip and let out a sigh of contentment. Ainsley squeezed Meredith’s fingers.

  “I got a call on Monday about my submission to the memoir contest.”

  “You what?” Meredith’s eyes grew in size, and Ainsley laughed. “They called you? That means—”

  “I won!” Ainsley answered for her. “I won first place.”

  “Oh my God!” Meredith jumped out of her seat and wrapped her arms around Ainsley’s slim form, squeezing tight. Ainsley returned the embrace, settling her chin on Meredith’s shoulder for a moment before Meredith moved back and held Ainsley at an arm’s length. “Congratulations!”

  “Thanks! I haven’t told anyone else yet.”

  “How did you even keep it to yourself for so long? This is so exciting!”

  “I wanted to tell you first,” Ainsley said sheepishly. “If you hadn’t pointed out the contest, I never would have known to enter it.”

  “Ainsley.” Meredith’s look softened, and she cupped Ainsley’s cheek. “I’m so proud of you.”

  Ainsley nodded and smiled, her eyes watering. Meredith leaned in for a kiss, one that went from quick to long and drawn out. Giddiness floated through Ainsley, and she wrapped her arms around Meredith’s back and pulled her in closer, making the kiss last even longer. Before she knew it, Meredith was gasping and her hand was on Meredith’s breast. Sliding it away and back around Meredith’s back, Ainsley tried to get everything under control again.

  “We can’t—” Meredith swallowed “—we can’t do that in here again.”

  “I know. Moment of weakness.”

  “Undoubtedly,” Meredith whispered and kissed Ainsley lightly on the lips. “May I share this with Sam? I’m sure it’ll brighten his day a little bit.”

  “Yeah. The issue comes out next month apparently, so there’s no use in keeping it a secret anymore.”

  Meredith cupped Ainsley’s cheek bringing Ainsley’s focus onto her. “I really am very proud of you.”

  “Thanks. I’m proud of me too. I never thought—I didn’t think it would happen.”

  “I thought you had a pretty good chance. Turns out I was right.”

  Meredith moved away and sat back down in her chair, taking off her glasses and chewing on the end of one of the earpieces. Ainsley nodded and turned to leave the room, but when her hand was on the doorknob, Meredith stopped her by calling her name.

  “Dinner Thursday?”

  “Are you cooking? Because my cooking skills are in a serious lack of good.”

  Meredith chuckled. “Yes, I’ll cook.”

  “Good. I’ll see you then.” Ainsley left the room with a smile and skip to her step.

  #

  Ainsley looped her arm in Adam’s and rested her head on his shoulder as they walked through the chilled campus and down to the cafeteria. Adam was close to finishing the first draft of his senior thesis and had opted for a break for food, inviting Ainsley out. She’d gladly accepted and despite better efforts couldn’t get the dinner she was having later that evening off her mind.

  She smiled and then squeezed Adam’s hand. “I’ve got something to tell you.”

  “You’re just full of news this week. First your short story is published in a magazine of all things. So now what? What do you have to share with the lovely Adam today?”

  Snorting, Ainsley rolled her eyes. “Don’t you want to know where I was last weekend?”

  “I figured you were hiding out at home preparing for midterms, which are this week by the way. If you’ve forgotten and all that in your fame.”

  “I know,” she answered. “And no, I wasn’t hiding out at home preparing for midterms. Unlike your major, I don’t actually have many exams. Just papers—lots and lots of papers. And I can whip those things out pretty quickly. It’s the editing of them that takes forever.”

  “Right.” He opened the door to the cafeteria for her, and they both walked to the lunch line arm in arm.

  Ainsley felt right at home with him. She squeezed his arm and stepped back. “I might not be a crammer like you, but I do cram. However, this year I did not need to. After the other week—well, let’s just say I put my time and effort into doing the only thing I could to focus on, and that was schoolwork, so I was quite ahead on midterms this year.”

  “Whoa! You’re special.”

  Ainsley rolled her eyes and backhanded him lightly on the arm. Rarely was she not prepared for midterms or finals, but at least she didn’t normally have them all done the week before they were due. Biting her lip, Ainsley handed over her ID to the student worker who swiped her in. Both she and Adam went their separate ways, got their food and met up at their favorite spot to sit in the cafeteria. Ainsley picked at her food until Adam arrived back with his second plate.

  “What did you want to tell me?”

  “What?” Ainsley asked.

  “You definitely wanted to tell me something, so what was it? You get all quiet when I don’t pay attention and you’ve hardly even talked through my first plate.”

  Ainsley nodded. He was right, of course, but she wasn’t quite sure how to say the words exactly. And words being at a loss for her was rare. She swallowed and set her fork down, focusing on him as best she could.

  “I went to Meredith’s house last weekend.”

  “You what?” He choked on his bite of pizza.

  “Well, I hadn’t seen her for a whole week. She’d canceled class and office hours and had been scarce around campus. And she wasn’t answering phone calls or texts, and I couldn’t take it anymore. So I kind of staked out her place and waited to see if she came home.”

  “That’s creepy, Ainsley. Like downright creepy.”

  “I was worried. I could care less where she was, but it was weird of her to be gone and quiet for so long.”

  “You have problems,” he said, pointing his finger in her direction. “Real problems. Especially if you think that was okay.”

  “Well, apparently it was okay.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “She came home.”

  “From?”

  “Sam Campbell’s house. He’s another English Prof.”

  “Yeah. You had class with him a few times.”

  “I did.” Ainsley took a bite of her pasta, forcing it into her mouth and chewing until she could swallow. She didn’t have much of an appetite after Adam’s comment, but she was going to eat the food she’d paid for. “I wasn’t sure going there was a good idea, if that helps any.”

  “It does a little, but not much.”

  Ainsley rolled her eyes and set her fork down again. “Well, forgive my tendency to worry when someone just randomly disappears.”

  “Was it random?”

  Shrugging, Ainsley picked up her fork again having the hot air knocked out of her in two seconds flat. She’d wanted to yell at him, but she didn’t have the energy to do it, especially in a cafeteria full of people.

  “No, it wasn’t. She was helping Sam for the week. Anyway, I went to her place, she let me it. I helped her that night, but the next morning—the next morning we kinda did it.”

  “You what?” Adam lowered his chin and raised his gaze. “You had sex with your professor.”

  “I did—more than once.”

  His silence wasn’t helpful. When he didn’t respond, Ainsley bit her lower lip and waited for any type of reaction from him. Adam just sat there with a dumbfounded look on his face while the hustle and bustle of the cafeteria went on around him.

  “Say something,” she implored.

  “I don’t know what to say. Honestly, I thought this was just a crush and you wouldn’t go this far.”

  “I kissed her weeks ago. I kissed her that first week of school, and again just before pride. What would make you think this was just a crush?”

  “Because it’s the stupidest idea you have ever had. I’m serious about that.” He lowered his voice to a whisper and leaned in so only she could
hear him. “Fucking your professor is the worst idea on the planet. Do you know what kind of trouble you could get into? Hell, what kind of trouble she will get into?”

  “I don’t know what you mean.”

  “Everything will be pinned on her if this comes out wrong. Everything, Ains. She won’t stand a chance against the school board, against other professors. She’ll be kicked out onto the street like the blip of her career here made no difference whatsoever. It’ll all be brushed under the rug, and they’ll watch you like a hawk until you graduate.”

  “I don’t think that’s going to happen.”

  “No? Have you even looked into the policies?”

  “No, I haven’t. And frankly, I’m surprised you have.”

  Adam blushed. He full out blushed, and Ainsley narrowed her eyes at him. “Oh my God, you didn’t! You can’t sit there and judge me for doing this when you went and screwed your prof.”

  “I didn’t—okay, calm down. I didn’t screw him. I wanted to, but I couldn’t get around how he was managing to get away with it. I’m sure he’d swing my way if I could have a few minutes with him, but it’s not a good idea. He’s in charge of my grade. He’s in charge of the department. And he’s already going to get fired soon enough for sleeping with all the other students he’s slept with.”

  “Is he? Because if this many students know about it, then I’m sure someone on the faculty knows. So why hasn’t he been fired already? Simple. He’s a man, and the relationships he’s had with students have been of the hetero nature. It’s fucking bullshit.”

  “Trust me. I completely agree, but Ainsley, you can’t get dragged into something like this.”

  “It’s a bit late to be telling me not to and a complete change from what you said before.”

  Adam sighed and rubbed his hands over his face, the pizza he’d gotten completely forgotten on his plate. Ainsley hadn’t touched her pasta and didn’t intend to as soon as their conversation was over. She didn’t want to sit with him any longer. If anything, she barely even trusted him anymore.