When Fate Isn't Enough

by Isabelle Richards

  I grab my phone from the nightstand and send him a text.

  Lily: Hate waking up alone, but love to get your notes. The book’s great, but I live to tease you about your British nonsensical words! Anxiously waiting for details about my special plans.

  Gavin: You Americans and your need for instant gratification. Patience, luv! Pleasure is built by anticipation.

  Lily: Is this a promise of pleasure? Because I’ll be as patient as you want if there’s a happy ending involved. You’re so good at delivering instant gratification.

  Gavin: I have to give a presentation now and all I can think of is happy endings. Thank you for that. I’ll have to sit for my presentation until things… settle down.

  Lily: Happy to help!

  This man sure does know how to keep a girl on her toes! While I wait for more information on today’s adventure, I attend to my ever-growing to-do list. I plot some blog ideas and start writing.

  Around ten, I head out to learn my way around London. I take the Tube to Piccadilly Circus, which wasn’t what I was expecting. No elephants. No big top. Not a clown in sight. Just billboards and buildings. I walk a few blocks to the London Library, which is by far the largest, most impressive library I’ve ever been to. I meant to just learn my way there, but I get lost exploring it. I’d been worried I wouldn’t be able to do the research I need for my writing, but clearly I was mistaken. For a research junkie, this place is like Disneyland to me.

  After the library, I wander the streets for a bit. I’ve always found that the best way to learn a new place is to get lost and find my way home. I wander and find Buckingham Palace, which is spectacular. I watch the Changing of the Guard like the other tourists. After two hours of walking, I’m exhausted and frozen. I grab my phone to look for the nearest Tube station, and see that I’m not far from Gavin’s. It’s cold and windy, but I decide to walk the rest of the way.

  My fingers and toes are numb by the time I get to Gavin’s. The tub calls to me the moment I walk in the door. I overdid it a bit today, but it was worth it. My cell rings, snapping me out of my bath coma. It’s Greene.

  Feeling weird about being naked in the tub talking to Greene, I hop out and dry off.

  “Hey, Greene! How’s it going? I’m amazed you have this number.”

  “I just called Gavin and he gave it to me. Look, Lil, I wish I was calling just to check in. I have to talk to you about something.” He sounds somber.

  I sit down on the edge of the tub and ring out my hair. “Jesus, I thought all of the doom and gloom was behind me.”

  He sighs. “Max’s gone dark. I’m worried about him. I didn’t think he should take this assignment, but he did, and now you may be in danger.”

  Panic swells inside me. “Greene, you aren’t making sense. Start from the beginning.”

  “Max went undercover with a FBI/DEA taskforce, going after the cartel. He believed that they were more involved in your capture than you thought. He’s too damn close to this case and had no business getting involved, but he has some good contacts and the DEA jumped at the chance to bring him in. Since he went in, he’s missed every check in with his handler.”

  I gasp. Suddenly, it’s freezing in here. I quickly pad to the closet and shrug into Gavin’s cashmere robe. It’s huge, but warm. “What was Max thinking? I can’t believe he did this. If he gets out of this alive, I’m going to kill him. Everything was wrapped up. Why the hell did he need to stir things up? Not- Charlie wasn’t connected to the cartel!” The lie flows so easily, I almost believe it myself.

  “A few reasons,” he replies. “But mostly guilt. He feels like he let you down and needs to avenge you by going after them. ”

  “That’s bullshit! Dammit, Greene, this shit was behind me. I was moving on!”

  “I know. I tried to talk him out of it, but he couldn’t let it go. He was obsessed. The deeper he got into the investigation, the more he learned just how nasty these guys are. The things they’ve done, Lil… It’s enough to make your hair turn white. I’m not sure if I’m more worried that his cover’s been blown or if he’s going rogue and is trying to take down a bigger fish than his assignment entails. This is too personal for him to stay objective.”

  Yelling at Greene isn’t going to solve anything, so I try to regain some composure. I sit on the edge of the bed and take a few deep breaths. “What happens now? How will you know if he’s in trouble or not?”

  “Everyone is reaching out to contacts to see what they can find out. I want you to be on your toes, though. I seriously doubt this is going to come back to you, but with Max gone dark, it’ll make me feel better if you’re on high alert.”

  “I’m not just worried about me. What about Max? He could be in way over his head. We need to pull him out.” And if they figure out that my roommate has infiltrated them, my head’s on the chopping block.

  I hear him shuffling papers. Looking at the time, he’s probably off to the daily staff meeting. After living with an FBI agent, I learned it’s nowhere near as sexy of a job as it sounds. They spend more time in meetings and doing paperwork than they do in the field. “Look, don’t worry too much yet. This call may be premature; he may be fine. Just promise me you’ll be smart and stay aware of your surroundings, okay?”

  “I will. Please keep me posted when you can,” I say.

  “Will do. Try not to worry,” he says before he hangs up.

  Fat chance of that! I cannot believe Max would do something so stupid. He couldn’t just let sleeping dogs lie. I wish I could speak to Lorenzo or Carlos and find out what the hell is going on. Damn them and their no-communication rules! I have no choice but to sit and wait.

  Too frustrated to stay in the condo, I decide to go get some fresh air. I blow dry my hair quickly, then throw on a pair of jeans and a sweater. As I walk out of the building, I look at the map on my phone and walk straight into someone. My phone and her purse fall to the sidewalk.

  “Oh, my goodness, I’m so sorry! What a klutz I am!” I say as I reach down to pick up her purse.

  As I hold her Gucci bag out to her, I catch a glimpse of her face. She looks so familiar, but I can’t place where I’ve seen her.

  She snatches the purse from my hands and scowls at me. “Can’t you watch where you are going? Damn Americans!” She inspects the bag closely. “This is alligator! Do you have any idea how much it’s worth?”

  Something clicks in my brain.

  “Olivia?”

  She scoffs. “I see you aren’t dead. I told him all the theatrics were for nothing.”

  Trying to look as casual as possible, I dust my phone off and look for scratches. I don’t want to give her the satisfaction of knowing how much she bothers me. “Nope, alive and well. What are you doing here?”

  She’s more beautiful in person. The pictures hardly do her justice. Her raven hair is so shiny, it looks wet. Her flawless alabaster skin makes me wonder if she’s ever needed make up a day in her life. Not a pore in sight. She’s disgustingly perfect. Until she speaks, that is. “I came to see Gavin. I heard he was back. I just didn’t realize you were here as well.” Her voice is filled with disdain.

  I’ve dealt with plenty of her type before and she doesn’t intimidate me in the least. Women like her only have power over you if you let them. So the more she looks at me like I’m a piece of gum stuck on her shoe, the more I show her I don’t give a shit. “It’s the middle of the afternoon, Olivia. He’s at his office. If you want to see him, you should call and make an appointment.”

  She tries to put her hand on my shoulder, but I dodge her move by shifting my weight onto my back hip and looking down at my phone. My incoming text is far more important than whatever she has to say. And yet, she keeps on talking. “You, Lily, are a passing fling. I don’t need a lecture on Gavin from you. I was here long before you and I’ll be here long after he loses interest in you. You’re no longer in crisis and he’ll tire of you. Quickly. Avoid the flight of shame and just go home now while you still have some d
ignity.”

  After tucking my phone in my back pocket, I sniff the air dramatically. “The stench of your desperation is suffocating, like cheap perfume. If you think Gavin is so in love with you, go talk to him. Try acting like a grown up instead of a high school tramp.”

  I notice a cab turning a corner and I walk to the curb with my hand up. I’d give anything to turn around and see the look on her face but looking back will lessen the impact of my exit. I give the driver Gavin’s office address, which may be a mistake. I’ve never been there before and I haven’t specifically been invited but between Greene’s call and Olivia’s tirade, I need to talk to him soon or I’ll explode.

  When the cab pulls up to Gavin’s building, I chicken out. I’m not dressed for an office, and the last thing I want to do is storm in like some clingy bimbo. His office is in Canary Wharf, an area of London I haven’t seen yet, so I wander around the docks and take in the scenery. It is a very cool area that sort of reminds me of the Boston Harbor. The Thames is beautiful and being outside is calming my nerves. Even though I’m freezing my ass off, I enjoy myself. I can see why Gavin loves it here so much.

  At five, I’m still popping in and out of the shops on the wharf when Gavin texts.

  About to leave my office. Be home soon! Counting the minutes…

  Lily: Great, can I catch a lift?

  Gavin: Where are you?

  Lily: In front of your building.

  I sit on the steps of his building to wait for a response. After about five minutes, my hands are frozen, and I’m ready to head down to the Tube. Maybe he didn’t get my message. Looking at the map on my phone, I stop paying attention to what’s around me and I’m grabbed from behind. I lash out. I look down and see my attacker is off balance, so I elbow him in the gut and pivot. As I turn, I kick and knock his legs out. He lands on his ass.

  I look into his face, instantly feeling guilty.

  I crouch down to see if he’s okay. “Gavin! Oh, my God, I’m so sorry! Did I hurt you?”

  His eyes are wide, and he looks shaken. “That was so foolish of me. I’m sorry. Are you okay?”

  “I’m just glad I didn’t hurt you. ” I put my hand over my heart as he stands.

  He dusts off his backside. “I received your text and was so excited you were here, I ran down straightaway. I was about to scoop you up but I should have known better.”

  Hearing him make me sound like a victim makes me cringe. I’m a survivor. I kicked ass and got out alive. Why I am still so jumpy?

  As if he can read my mind, he hugs me. “Just because you’re still processing what happened doesn’t make you a victim. Allow yourself time to heal. If you promise to do that, I promise not to sneak up on you again.”

  I gently punch his shoulder. “Get out of my head,” I say teasingly.

  “Oh what I wouldn’t do to see what goes on in that head of yours,” he says, then kisses my forehead. “I’ll have to commend Max. He certainly taught you well,” Gavin says with a smile.

  “Ugh, about Max. I have so much to tell you.” I groan.

  He holds his finger up. “I want to hear all about it, but first, let me tell you about our plans for tonight,” he says, waggling his eyebrows. He takes my hand and leads me to his car.

  “I completely forgot. Do tell!”

  He pushes the button on the elevator to the parking garage. “First we grab a quick dinner, and then we’re off to the Royal Observatory. I have an astronomer friend there who’s going to give us a special tour of the universe.”

  I’m completely blown away. “That’s so cool. Like, best date ever cool. It pays to have friends in strange places, huh?”

  The elevator arrives and he motions for me to get on. The elevator car fills up quickly, so he puts our conversation on pause until we get out three floors down. “When we were at the hospital, Em shared many Lily stories, and—”

  I bury my head in my hands. “Urg, I can only imagine what she said.”

  He unlocks his Range Rover with the remote and opens the door for me. Once I’m in, he closes the door and then circles around to the driver’s side. “It was all wonderful and just made me love you more. Anyroad, she said that one of your favorite classes at university was astronomy. Something about how Tucson has a big observatory and going there was one of your favorite projects. Then something went sour and you couldn’t go back?”

  “Yeah, she slept with the professor. The married professor. I went from being able to go whenever I wanted to being banned from the premises.”

  He looks over his shoulder as he backs out of the space. “That’s bollocks! Why would you carry the can because she bunked up with the professor?”

  I raise an eyebrow. “You went all British on me. Who’s carrying a can?” I think I get the gist, but I like to break his balls a little. Or his bollocks, I should say.

  He rolls his eyes. “It means take the blame. Why’d you lose privileges because Em couldn’t keep her legs together?”

  “Technically, only grad students were allowed to go there with any sort of regularity. Undergrads got one field trip there, and that’s it. Unless you are boinking the teacher. Once his wife found out about them, I was taken off the VIP list.”

  “Well, you’re in luck. Em has not slept with Gordon, so tonight you get an all-access pass.”

  Looking down at my jeans and V-neck sweater, I say, “I’m not really dressed for anything fancy.”

  He gently squeezes my thigh. “Don’t worry, luv. You’re perfect as you are.”

  After fighting nasty traffic, Gavin takes me to a small restaurant that he claims has the best bangers and mash in the city. I wasn’t crazy about the sausages, but the mashed potatoes were out of this world. Like many pubs in London, they have cider on tap, which thrills me.

  After dinner, we fight even heavier traffic to the Observatory. While we inch along through gridlock, Gavin tells me about his day. So much of what he does is classified or top secret as they say here, but he shares as much as he can. The office politics are highly entertaining. Everything from fighting over food in the fridge to some serious cutthroat competitive behavior. It seems jobs at Edwards are highly sought after, and people do the damnedest things to try to impress Gavin. If they only knew he sees right through their antics.

  I should tell him about O and Greene, but I’m not ready to darken the mood. I’ll tell him later. For now, I just want to enjoy the casual banter of two normal people, with normal lives.

  It takes us almost an hour to go the few miles to the Observatory. We park in the back and enter through an employee entrance, where Gordon is waiting for us. He’s five foot four, if he’s lucky. If his hair were blond instead of light brown, I would say he’s an older Elroy Jetson.

  I walk up to him and hug him. “Gordon, it’s so nice to meet you. I can’t tell you how excited I am.” I notice that he doesn’t hug me back, and when I pull back, I see that he’s beet red. I cringe. “Sorry! We Americans can be a bit forward. Big huggers over in the States.” The more I talk, the redder he gets, so I shut up.

  Gavin bursts out laughing, and Gordon punches him in the shoulder. “Lily, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I hear you love looking up at the stars. I owe this Neanderthal a favor or two, and you’re in luck. The rest of the crew is out at a conference, so I can show you around.”

  He takes us to the Observatory. Gordon gives us a bit of a lecture, most of which flies right over my head. His current project is galactic evolution, which sounds like the name of a soccer team to me. The pictures he shows me are amazing. My favorites are the star formations. So beautiful.

  Once he’s been around me a bit longer, Gordon stops blushing every time I ask him a question or look in his direction. I often touch people when I talk to them which clearly makes him uncomfortable, so I try to rein it in. When we get to the telescope, we end up standing very close to each other, and he jumps back.

  Gavin whispers in my ear, “Stop flirting with him. You’re making him nervous, luv.”


  I elbow him in the ribs and give him a death stare.

  After an hour of looking at stars and planets, Gordon says, “Time’s up. I’ve got to run off to dinner with my mum. Gavin, the other room is all set for you.” He picks up his briefcase and directs us back to the lobby. “We’re the last ones here. I trust you’ll clean up after yourselves and close up when you leave.”

  Gavin pats him on the back. “Of course. Thank you for this. Say hello to your mum for me.” Gordon nods and leaves with a wave.

  After I hear the door click closed, I say, “What a strange little man.”

  “He’s quirky, that’s for sure. Positively brilliant, but he gets a bit uncomfortable in social settings.”

  I lean against the wall. “How did you two meet?”

  “His twin brother, Graham, has been one of my closest mates since Oxford. We were both Full Blue in crew—”

  I raise an eyebrow. “Come again?”

  He rolls his eyes. “Full Blue is first team. Or, I suppose maybe you’d say varsity in the US.” He takes my hand and leads me through a set of double doors.

  “Anyroad,” he continues. “The guys are twins, but polar opposites. You’ve met Gordon. He’s never been social, but he’s getting better. Five years ago, he probably would have fainted when you hugged him. Graham, on the other hand, is a social butterfly. He’s trying to be an actor down in Australia, otherwise I’m sure you would have met him. He’s tall, couldn’t pass a science course if his life depended on it, and he’s a big hit with the ladies.”

  I gently slap his arm. “You should have warned me Gordon’s so shy, you dork! I feel awful. He was so kind to let us come.”

  “I just helped him get a grant that will fund his research for the next ten years. This is the least he can do.”

  I follow him through several sets of doors and down several corridors. “Where are we going?” I ask.

  He opens another door and motions for me to go before him. “We’re starting the next part of our date. In through here, my darling.”