Taming Eric

by J. a Melville

  The bitterness in her voice sent pain stabbing through his heart. Just like that she could open up wounds that still ran deep and leave him bleeding emotionally again. She was still so angry with him, he wasn’t sure if he’d ever be able to fix this and see that spark in her eyes again rather than the bitterness and anger that he saw now. How could she think it was that simple? That he would just go out and find the next woman? He didn’t want another woman, he only wanted her. “I don’t want another woman dammit. I still want you, you’re all I can think about Natasha.”

  At his words she dropped her head back against the headrest, her eyes closed. Her voice no longer sounded so full of anger. She was calmer, more resigned when she said. “It’s not just me anymore Eric. I’m pregnant. It’s a two for the price of one deal now. I’m not your beck and call girl. I won’t come and warm your bed every time you get an urge you can’t take care of Eric.” She opened her eyes to look at him. “Now will you get out of my car, I have to go out and you’re going to make me late.”

  “Where are you going baby?”

  “Don’t call me that Eric. I’m not your baby. I have a doctor’s appointment if you must know. I need to go so will you get out of my damned car.” She snapped at him.

  He folded his arms, his expression set stubbornly. “Forget it Natasha, I’m not getting out of this car. I’m coming with you to the doctors.”

  He jumped when she thumped her hands down on the steering wheel and turned on him bristling with anger. “Fuck you Eric. Don’t you dare act like you give a damn about me or my baby. Just get out!” Although her words were slicing into his heart with each one of them, he schooled his features to remain calm and not show what her words were doing to him. He responded by simply doing up his seatbelt and she groaned. “Why are you doing this? Why can’t you just leave?”

  “I’m not getting out of this car Natasha so unless you want to be late for your appointment, I suggest you start driving now. I’ve changed my mind.”

  Natasha just gaped at him. “You’ve changed your mind? Changed your mind about what?”

  “I can’t let you go through this alone. It’s my fault you’re pregnant. I’m terrified Natasha. You have no idea how scared I am but I can’t let you carry my baby and raise my child without being a part of yours and my baby’s life. If that means only seeing you when you decide, then I’ll settle for that and one day I might tell you why the idea of becoming a father scares the absolute hell out of me.”

  “I already know. Maggie told me about your childhood.” She said quietly.

  Fuck Maggie! How dare she share something that wasn’t hers to share. He swore out loud. “Damn Maggie, she had no fucking right. How the fuck did you two become so tight, so fast?”

  She laughed but there was no humour in it. “Maggie foolishly had some idea in her head that you might actually care about me.”

  Eric felt his heart skip a beat. Fuck, Maggie knew him too well. Obviously his attempts to cover his feelings for Natasha hadn’t been good enough to fool Maggie.

  “Don’t you dare give her grief for telling me either.” She continued. “She only wants what’s best for you so don’t you go screaming in her ear do you hear me?” She warned him, her eyes flashing at him and he couldn’t help it, her need to warn him off upsetting Maggie struck him as amusing and his lips curled up in a smile for the first time in five days.

  “You are gorgeous when you’re angry.” He grinned at her. God but it was so good to be by her side again. They were nowhere near ok, but she wasn’t kicking him out of the car so that was a good sign. Ok, she’d told him to get out, but she wasn’t pushing the issue. Maybe he was getting through to her at least slightly that he had no intention of going anywhere.

  “Shut up Eric. Seems I have no choice now so you’re coming to the doctors since you won’t get out of my car. When we get there I want you to just sit down and don’t say anything.” She warned him as she started the car and pulled out of the driveway.

  When they arrived at the doctors they didn’t have to wait long to be called in and Eric stood to go in with her but she told him to sit down again. “Forget it Natasha, I’m coming in too. Don’t you dare try and stop me.” He was determined to stand his ground. She wasn’t going to push him away, he wouldn’t let her.

  “Fine, but just shut up ok?” She glared at him before walking ahead of him into the doctor’s room. He couldn’t help grinning at the rigid way she held herself as she walked in front of him. He’d got his own way. It might be a small victory, but it was a victory all the same.

  The doctor went through the standard questions of when Natasha’s last period had been, family history and whether she’d done a pregnancy test which made them both tense over that question. He did another test to be sure, took some blood and asked if she knew who the father was. Eric immediately spoke up and said he was.

  The rest of the appointment was just a list of things she needed to do to take care of herself and their baby and finally they were free to go once another appointment was made for one month’s time when they would be able to listen to their baby’s heart beat and make sure everything was progressing as it should. At 18 weeks she would have an ultrasound so they could see their baby for the first time.

  When they were back out at her car she asked him where he wanted to be dropped off. She wasn’t getting rid of him that easily. “My car’s at your place baby.” She frowned at him but he ignored her. Now that he’d decided to look at winning her back as being like acquiring a new business, he wasn’t going to be pushed away no matter how hard she tried. “Are you going home now?”

  She shook her head. “No, I’m going shopping. I haven’t been shopping since I got back from Tasmania and I’m running out of options.”

  Grocery shopping? He could do that. It would be a bit of a novelty for him given he never did it anymore. Alice cooked his meals so she did the shopping. “Well that’s ok baby. I’ll come shopping with you.”

  She responded by laughing at him. “You’re joking right? You come grocery shopping. You, Mr Rothman, CEO. Have you ever gone grocery shopping? What about work? Have you been back into the office yet?”

  “I’ve been back but I couldn’t concentrate baby. It’s not the same without you there. I wish you’d think about coming back. How am I expected to replace you?”

  She stared at him for a moment saying nothing and Eric wondered what was going through her head. “Eric, what are you doing? Why this sudden turn around? Why are you acting like you give a shit? Only a week ago you told me to fuck off, that you didn’t want me. You were so relieved when you thought I wasn’t pregnant. Why are you hanging around now?”

  He stared at her in amazement. She’d actually thought he wanted her out of his life? She had been the one dismissing him. He’d merely lashed out at her because she was hurting him. Fuck but if she knew how much he loved her she wouldn’t be asking him why he was hanging around now. Did that mean she did want him in her life? Fuck but he hoped so and even if she didn’t, he intended being in her face so much he would eventually wear her down.

  “I’m here because I want to be here baby. I told you before, you’re like a drug and I can’t give you up and if you remember correctly, you were the one that told me that you had no further use for me. I’m a man, I lashed out at you because you dented my ego. We men are fragile things baby.” He grinned at her attempting to make light of a situation that had been far from light at the time. Her words had almost destroyed him. “I told you baby, the thought of becoming a father scares the crap out of me. I’m bad news, you should know that. Maggie told you. My father was a bastard. Every man Mum brought around were bastards. No one wanted me and I wasn’t enough for my Mother once my father died anyway. How the fuck can I make a good Father? I’m from bad blood, bad stock. I’m so scared that my seed is growing inside you now Natasha. I don’t want to be like my Father, but I can’t be sure
that I won’t.” His eyes were filled with anguish when he turned to look at her again.

  Natasha stared at him, her eyes filled with a look he hoped to hell wasn’t pity. “Just because your father was a bastard Eric doesn’t mean you will be but I’m still not convinced your intentions are good. You expect me to believe that you’ve changed when a week ago you’re screaming at me and so angry, then enraged because I’m pregnant, raping me and then nothing for several days. Now you turn up acting like you’re a changed man or something?” The look she gave him was filled with doubt. “I’m sorry Eric, but I’m not buying it.”

  Eric didn’t hear much beyond the word rape. He flinched at the sound of that word on her lips. He shouldn’t have done what he did but it wasn’t rape. He didn’t want to think that his rough possession of her might be considered rape and it tore at his heart that she used that word to describe what he’d done to her. “Don’t call it rape Natasha.” He closed his eyes against the images of her standing against the wall with his seed running down her legs. “I’m sorry I was rough, but it wasn’t rape. I felt you respond. You might have been fighting it out of some desire to make me suffer or whatever the hell motivated you, but don’t call it rape.”

  “Call it whatever you need to, to make you feel better Eric, but you took me against my will.” She looked over at him as she unlocked the car and climbed in. With a deep sigh he climbed into the passenger seat and neither of them said anything more while she drove to Erina Fair shopping centre.

  She found parking and turned to him. “Are you sure you want to do this? What if someone recognises you?”

  “Fuck it Natasha. Even CEO’s need to eat.” He grinned. He was surprised she’d be worried about him being recognised. Everything had changed. She was pregnant with his child and eventually everyone was going to know that so worrying about who might see them together was no longer of any concern to him.

  “Yeah well Mr Big CEO, you can push the damned trolley then. Make yourself useful.” She said and Eric saw a small smile on her face before she walked ahead of him into the supermarket. He grabbed a trolley and it didn’t take him long to realise he had the trolley from hell. It wanted to go anywhere but the direction he wanted it to go. He cursed at it as if that was going to make a difference and he scowled when Natasha turned back to grin at him. Fuck her, she was enjoying this obviously but it did lift his heart to see her smile at him. The first real smile he’d received from her in days. He’d put up with the trolley from hell if it meant she’d smile like that again.

  “Glad you find it so damned amusing.” He scowled and he felt his stomach flip over at the sheer beauty of her when she burst out laughing. The rest of their time in the supermarket was spent amicably and Eric continued to trail after her while she went from aisle to aisle loading up with everything she needed. With the trolley piled high by the time they got to go through the checkout he figured she mustn’t have been joking when she said she didn’t have much left in the house. Occasionally he had offered some suggestions to make sure she got a well balanced diet for herself and their baby.

  When Natasha drove back to her townhouse Eric helped unload the car of all the bags of groceries. She reached into the boot of her car to grab some bags and he slapped her hands away. “I’ve got it baby.” And he carried all the bags inside.

  “For crying out loud Eric. I’m pregnant not a damned invalid.” She finally snapped at him but he ignored her and continued carrying the bags inside.

  Once everything was inside he even helped unpack the groceries despite her obvious irritation at him taking over with such a menial task. “For fuck’s sake Eric, what is all this? You’re Eric Rothman the wealthy businessman, not the domestic help. What do you want?” She glared at him with her hands planted firmly on her hips.

  He turned to her giving her an innocent look. “I would have thought it was obvious baby. I’m trying to help you so you can get some rest. You heard what the doctor said.”

  She snorted at him which made him struggle to hide his amusement. “I don’t think putting groceries away is going to test my endurance too much.”

  At her words, an unexpected wave of desire flooded his body. He knew what her endurance was like. He’d witnessed it firsthand. She had a sex drive that matched his easily. His eyes roamed over her but he struggled to rein in his desire. Now was not the time and he had too much ground to make up with her given what he’d done to her last time he’d seen her. His eyes shifted to the wall where he’d let his desire overrule his control five days ago and guilt over his behaviour flooded his mind, helping him to get himself back under control. He couldn’t help himself though and told her jokingly. “Oh baby I’d love to test your endurance.”

  She frowned at him. “I’m not having sex with you Eric. You might have decided you want to be a part of mine and the baby’s life but it’s going to take more than one doctor’s appointment and a shopping trip to convince me. I haven’t forgotten what your track record is like. You can’t stay with the same woman for more than a couple of months.” He opened his mouth to tell her this was different but she held her hand up to silence him. “It’s the truth Eric. I saw it all the time at work. It was me who sent the ‘thanks for knowing you, but no thanks’ gifts to all the women as you dumped them. I would sooner raise this baby alone than have you passing in and out of our lives when it suits you. That is not some effort on my part to trap you either, so if that’s going through your brain, forget it.” She turned to continue unpacking groceries.

  He stayed silent for a while just helping her put the rest of the groceries away but inside his mind was racing. How the fuck was he going to convince her she wasn’t like all the other women? He chose those others because he knew he’d never fall for them so of course he got bored with them quickly but Natasha was so different. She was gorgeous, sexy, sweet, kind, gentle and witty and he loved her. He’d never gone even close to feeling for the others the way he felt about her. Somehow he had to try and convince her that he wasn’t going to get bored one day and move on. “Tell her you love her.” The little voice in his head said but there was no way in hell he could do that. If she rejected him he would be devastated plus he instinctively knew, she’d never believe a declaration of love right now. She’d think he was trying to trick her or manipulate her in some way and he wouldn’t risk that.

  Finally he turned to her. “I would like you to do me two favours. Please come back to work, at least for a couple of months baby. I need you. I don’t want to go through the crap of finding someone new. I’ll give you a raise, anything, and two, I want to prove I’m not going to disappear in a few months, I want to start a normal relationship with you. We went straight to the sex when we stayed at the hotel and we never dated. I want you to let me start dating you and I’d like to start tonight. Will you come out to dinner with me, please baby?”

  She said nothing for what felt like an eternity and Eric started to get nervous wondering what she was going to say, assuming she said anything at all. Finally after studying him for a while she simply said. “Ok.” He sagged with relief at that one simple word which meant so much to him. “That was only one ok Eric. That was ok for dinner. You’ll have to wait until tonight to get my answer about work.”

  He could live with that. Now he just wanted to get out of there before she changed her mind. “Ok, I’ll get going then baby. I’ll pick you up at six.”

  “Where are we going? What should I wear?”

  He bent and kissed her chastely on the cheek. “Wear anything you want baby.” He said before walking out the door, pulling it closed behind him. Once he was outside, he felt so excited and so relieved he just wanted to fist punch the air, but he forced himself to walk over to his car and climb into the driver’s seat without a fist punch just in case Natasha was watching him at all.

  He started his Porsche and pulled out, heading for home. He would have to hurry. By the time he got back, booked the
restaurant, showered and dressed, he’d just about have to head back up to the Coast, but he didn’t care. He’d do whatever it took to get Natasha back.

  * * *

  “Face it Eric, you’re turning into a woman.” He told himself later that day as he stood in his vast walk in robe staring at the rows of clothes wondering what the hell he was going to wear. He was showered, shaved and standing naked while he contemplated what to wear. He wanted to look good for Natasha. He wanted her to think he looked sexy, assuming she’d ever thought he did but she’d had no problem falling into bed with him over and over again when they’d been on their week together so he was guessing she didn’t think he was ugly. It still amazed him how insecure she made him feel. He’d never have stressed this much over clothes with his ex girlfriends. For fuck sakes he was turning into a pussy whipped sap. How could one woman have him in such a state all the time? If it wasn’t his cock doing the thinking for him it was him being strung out emotionally just trying to find ways to keep her and not lose her forever. “Face it Rothman, you are a soft cock, a soft cock, pussy whipped sap who is turning into a woman.” He said, reluctantly grinning at the new title he’d given himself.

  “Fuck it!” He pulled down black jeans and a long sleeved black shirt, shrugging into it and quickly buttoned it up before rolling the sleeves back to his elbows. He went commando as he preferred to do and stepped into his jeans, socks and black shoes and after a quick glance in the mirror he figured that was going to have to do. He had to get out of there and start driving back up to the Coast. He’d booked them a table at the seafood restaurant at Terrigal that overlooked the ocean and sat perched on the side of a steep hill. The restaurant was very popular and often hard to get into but the one benefit of his position is money talked and money could get him in just about anywhere he wanted to go.