Lost and Found

by John Glatt

  After his epiphany he spent hours drafting a rambling, often incomprehensible manifesto he called “Origins of Schizophrenia Revealed,” triumphantly proclaiming he had healed himself and was no longer a sexual deviant. And he claimed his “powerful new insight” would help law enforcement, educators and therapists worldwide understand why sex offenders, like himself, were unable to control their “abnormal desires and thoughts” and committed “such dysfunctional acts.”

  “Twenty-nine years ago I was imprisoned for a violent crime,” he wrote, “that behavioral scientists believe is not possible to end. Not only have I accomplished an end to that problem but I have established a powerful means of developing a pathway for others to accomplish the same quality control.”

  In his manifesto, which he later posted on the Internet, inviting the media to disseminate, Garrido attributed now being able to “process complex issues concerning love” as a key ingredient in his success.

  “It is the age-old struggle between right and wrong,” he wrote, “that is holding the human race back from discovering a freedom so capable that the renewing of one’s mind becomes a simpler reality.”

  Discovering this freedom, he wrote, had “reorganized and replaced an internal thought process with such unequivocal success that it literally redefines the possibilities.” There is now “solid hope” for “sexual predators,” suffering from “the many forms of aggressive sexual behavior.”

  He then went on to address the subject of celibacy at length.

  “Not all people who suffer from these types of problems,” he wrote, “are happy with their behavior and do experience major depression after ejaculation.”

  Garrido spoke of his own remorse and self-loathing after sex, saying he was helpless to control himself the next time he was aroused. Then he described how his spiritual rebirth had led to a loving new relationship with his wife, leaving it unclear if he meant Nancy or Alyssa.

  THIS IS MY STORY

  It started when I began to examine issues differently due to the many moral issues and experiences I have had, the type that leads to believing in a creator who deals with reality and help a person reason correctly. Having insight of how we form thoughts and the desire to live a healthy productive life I began to discover that the human mind has an undeveloped potential, one that is subject to our own thoughts.

  Because of my background I began to examine the issues of how certain behaviors cause a great deal of pain in myself and those who are victimized by those behaviors especially our family and my wife. Building from those personal experiences I prepared a way to deal with these issues in my own mind.

  How? For example every time I would see a woman who was attractive I began to examine my thoughts directly, not allowing my eyes to turn aside in order to avoid those issues I needed to confront the problem. Looking allowed my self-talk to provide pictures and words that dealt with reality, saying to myself that people are beautiful and attractive. Slowly I began re-addressing the matter with reality statements such as “see how beautiful she is to look at.” These messages began confirming my desire to be rid of the physical feelings the mind provided the body. I used the feedback of other realities like the harm it caused my wife and me to help supply a healthier out look [sic].

  In time it began to form a new picture, slowly beginning to drop and reinforce the issues that kept opening the doors to inappropriate thoughts and desires. At first the mind (or self talk) would send out the same stimulating messages leaving me subject to the physical attractions. As time went on I gained control over my body by taking the next step, (controlling masturbation) as it is a key in opening the mind up to more problematic developing. This allowed me (after a few months) to find a new experience awaiting me the type that escapes our notice without having the experience to know what it would provide. This helped supply a completely new freedom that at first became an observation and not much more, that is until the weeks passed by and the reality started to set in.

  When this was well formed within my belief system I started to notice a new freedom was being established through the subconscious mind. As this went on one day I discovered one of the most powerful freedoms imaginable, it was like the feelings one has when he is with someone new for the first time, except this time it was with my wife. When I had intercourse with her the feelings were so powerful and exciting that every time we have intercourse now it is as though I had just met her, you know the kind of excitement we all find when we first meet someone we keep thinking of them often during the day and can hardly wait to be with them.

  Get ready because here is the reward: Finally one day when we were having intercourse and I ejaculated I got up and in great anger I realized I never needed to act or do the things I used to believe was so great and stimulating. At that same moment I began explaining to her how my relationship with her was all I ever needed and at that moment I knew and felt what must be the greatest freedom of all because I was able to see myself as wanting those things only! I began to weep telling her, “I am sorry for the things I did in the past” at that time a feeling of remorse came over me, one that I never new [sic] or felt before or even dreamed was possible.

  Since then it has happened again and again and has become a powerful reward providing a loving interaction the kind that was meant to be between a man and a wife. The fact is I now find myself no longer wanting to separate from her after sexual intercourse, instead I keep telling her how much I truly love her, because now I find it desirable to hold her calling into play the same feelings I had just before the sexual interaction, the feelings that attracted me to desire that interaction was still there without the need to have sex, imagine that!

  Research shows the desire for a man to have intimacy with his partner after sex is not usually there instead I feel the opposite and very content afterwards. You have no idea how rewarding that is especially for me as I always wanted to get away from a woman after it was concluded, no longer needing or desiring to touch.

  This is just part of the progress I have made through knowledge I have gained concerning the creator and his purpose intended for mankind. I would never have changed nor would I have ever known the quality found in such freedom. Thanks to God and his Son Christ Jesus I am alive and free of these burdens.

  This is the process God and his son provided me with as I cleaned the inside of the mind not just to make it look that way on the outside. God will testify for me concerning these facts. God willing I will be teaching this and other skills Christ is providing for me in the prisons throughout the U.S. as well as over seas [sic].

  Soon afterward, Phillip and Nancy Garrido arrived at Maria Christenson’s recycling center, asking to talk to her privately in her office. He told her he was starting a church in his backyard, asking for a $2,000 loan to build a bathroom for it.

  When she agreed to lend Phillip the money, he suddenly became very emotional.

  “He started talking about how he was a changed man,” Maria recalled. “And he didn’t masturbate any more.”

  Then Phillip and Nancy both burst into tears, as he told her he had once been to prison, without elaborating further.

  “They were both crying and she was hanging onto him,” Maria recalled. “I couldn’t understand why is he in front of his wife telling me he doesn’t masturbate. I tried to get rid of him really fast.”

  From then on Christenson tried to avoid Phillip Garrido as much as possible, telling her employees never to leave her alone with him again.

  On January 31, 2006, Phillip Garrido filed the first of two applications, officially registering to create what he would call the Phillip C. Knight Institute. He submitted the forms and a $15 filing fee to the Contra Costa County Clerk’s Office. It was then duly stamped by recorder Stephen L. Weir, giving him until January 31, 2011, to use the “fictitious business name statement.”

  Several years later, he refiled the forms, as he had forgotten to write the word “Institute” on the earlier one.

  Later
there would be speculation that Garrido had intended to start his own school to educate his daughters, Angel, now aged eleven, and Starlit, eight, as well as giving him access to other young girls.

  To help him prepare the application, Garrido arrived at notary public David Robinson’s office with some legal questions.

  “We helped him fill out the paperwork,” said Robinson. “We notarized it.”

  Then Garrido triumphantly announced that he had cured himself of his sexual addiction.

  “It’s kind of a conversation stopper,” said Robinson’s wife, Rainy, who was also there. “I thought it was something very odd to say.”

  One morning, an excited Phillip Garrido arrived at Jim and Cheyvonne Molino’s car-wrecking yard with important news.

  “He said he had a project he was working on,” recalled Cheyvonne, “and it was the development of a cure for schizophrenia.”

  Garrido then showed them a large black box with an amplifier inside, and input jacks on either side for earphones. There was a third input for a microphone. He then explained how schizophrenics always hear voices in their head.

  “So if a normal person puts this on,” said Cheyvonne, “they can hear what a schizophrenic walks around hearing in everyday life. That’s how he explained it to me.”

  Then, Garrido demonstrated his device for the Molinos. He put on one set of earphones leading from the black box, giving the other to Cheyvonne. Then he turned around to face the wall, and started whispering into the microphone.

  “He’d ask you to tell him if you could hear him whispering,” she said. “And he’d change his sounds.”

  Over the next few months, as he perfected his black box, he started making increasingly bizarre claims about it. Eventually he maintained that it allowed him to hear the heavenly voices of angels.

  Nancy, Alyssa, Angel and Starlit were to serve as his devoted disciples, venturing out with him into the world to save mankind.

  For his first public demonstrations of the black box, Phillip Garrido would take Alyssa and their two young daughters to parks around Antioch, giving exhibitions to the homeless. His client and friend Marc Lister witnessed about a dozen of these.

  “There were a couple of parks in Antioch where the homeless hang out,” said Lister. “He’d go down there and test the waters.”

  According to Lister, Alyssa, Angel and Starlit all participated in the public demonstrations, which soon became more ambitious. Then Garrido started driving to People’s Park near the University of California, Berkeley Campus, where hundreds of homeless people gather everyday for free meals. Alyssa took charge of logistics and planning, while Angel and Starlit handed out free water and snacks.

  “He’d get a group of up to fifty people together,” said Lister, “by handing out sandwiches and cold drinks. Then he’d start plugging in his black box and do all his stuff.”

  According to Lister, Alyssa often complained about the problems she faced, organizing these public displays. And she would blame demons for trying to stop them, disseminating their message to save the world.

  “She was telling me they were out at People’s Park,” he recalled, “and all the things they had to do to get on campus. Dealing with the police and dealing with this person and that person. It was her belief that it was demons that were putting these people—these roadblocks—in their way.”

  Lister attended many demonstrations, genuinely curious about how the black box worked.

  “I just stood around and watched,” he said. “One time Phil was in a panic because he was late. There were a lot of people there and he was busy talking, handing out sandwiches, handing out drinks. He had [Alyssa] and the girls handing out some pamphlets and literature.”

  Then Garrido hooked up the power cord to a generator, and switched on his black box, turned away from the crowd and started talking.

  “I stood back and watched,” said Lister, “and I saw people raising their hands. ‘I hear you, Phil! I hear you, Phil.’ ”

  In late June 2006, Betty Upingco threw a high school graduation party for her son, inviting the entire neighborhood. In the middle of the party, Phillip Garrido showed up by himself, and as the loudspeakers were broken and there was no music, he ran home for his.

  After setting them up in the yard, he was invited to join the party. He began drinking and his behavior started getting “weird,” as one attendee put it. He gave strange looks to all the young girls, and made suggestive remarks.

  “He made us feel very uncomfortable,” recalled Betty. “And he kept trying to talk to the teenage girls. Finally my husband told the boys to take the speakers and give them back to him.”

  Garrido walked back to his house and stood by his front gate, inviting the girls inside as they walked home.

  “They came back and told us,” Betty said, “ ‘He keeps trying to lure us over to talk.’ So at that point, we started escorting the girls out.”

  A few days later, Betty Upingco’s daughter went on the Megan’s Law website for sexual offenders, discovering to her horror that their neighbor was on there. He was listed as a convicted rapist, along with his photograph and a description of the surgical scar on his abdomen.

  “So from that point on,” said Upingco, “anytime we had female guests over, we would escort them out of the area and made sure we kept an eye on them. It was very uncomfortable.”

  32

  “DO YOU HEAR ANYTHING?”

  That June, Phillip Garrido started demonstrating his black box to his print clients, as he did his rounds. He drafted a “Declaration of Affirmation,” which he asked each to sign after witnessing his invention.

  “This document is to affirm,” it began, “that I Phillip Garrido have clearly demonstrated the ability to control sound with my mind and have developed a device for others to witness this phenomena. By using a sound generator to provide the sound, and a headphone amplification system, (a device to focus your hearing so as to increase the sensitivity of what one is listening to) I have produced a set of voices by effectively controlling the sound to pronounce words through my own mental powers.”

  Then he left a space to be signed and dated, confirming that they had witnessed him at their place of business, “controlling a voice or set of voices that are unearthly in nature.”

  It also addressed Phillip Garrido’s state of mind.

  “Concerning the state of Phillips’ [sic] mindfulness and his freedom to conduct himself appropriately: I will confirm that out of the many years I have interacted with him, business or otherwise, he has always acted mature and intelligent. He has a steady personality throughout the many years I have known him. He has never displayed an unsuitable, incoherent or improper cognitive behavior all the years I have known him.”

  One morning he arrived at the East County Glass & Window company, asking to see the owner, Tim Allen.

  “He said, ‘I’m doing demonstrations with the box,” Allen recalled. “It was twice the size of a shoe box maybe, and it had some sort of electronics inside.”

  Garrido then proceeded to plug in the earphones, handing a set to his amused client to put on.

  “The way he described it,” said Allen, “is that he could hear people think. He could hear voices. God would talk to him and he could hear the voices through this box, and that I could understand what he was thinking telepathically.”

  Then, as Allen’s employees looked on in astonishment, Garrido began the demonstration.

  “I shut my eyes,” said Allen. “I really wanted to hear something, but all I could hear were kind of hollow sounds like a shell.”

  But the one voice he did hear came from outside the earphones, asking, “Do you hear anything?”

  “And so I opened my eyes,” he recalled, “and I looked at him and he was mouthing words, but he wasn’t saying anything.”

  Garrido asked him again if he had heard anything, and Allen said he could not.

  “Then he started whispering louder,” he said. “And when he got to a certain v
olume out of his mouth, I could hear him. So I told him, “Phil, I can hear you.’ And he said, ‘Great! My box works! It’s fantastic.’ ”

  Not wanting to hurt Garrido’s feelings, by telling him that it was his voice and not the black box he had heard, Allen thanked him for the demonstration, wishing him good luck with his new invention.

  “I just said, ‘That’s great, Phil.’ I didn’t want to erode his self-esteem.”

  Later Allen would say that his purported signature on Phillip Garrido’s Declaration of Affirmation that day was a forgery.

  When Garrido arrived at Deepal Karunaratne’s house with the black box, the realtor told him he didn’t have time for a demonstration.

  “He told me he could control voices with that,” recalled Karunaratne. “He kept bugging me to test it.”

  Finally the realtor gave in, just to humor him.

  “It was just like an amplifier,” he recalled. “I could see that he’s moving his lips. I could hear the voices like birds singing. The voices of the air. Stuff like that. I don’t know what he was trying to do.”

  When Garrido asked him to sign his declaration, Karunaratne agreed, just to get rid of him.

  A few days later, Phillip Garrido arrived at Janice Gomes’s new office, which she shared with a friend named Kevin, another of his print clients.

  “Phillip brought up a big black box,” Gomes recalled, “and he set it down on the table. And he says, ‘This is just fantastic. I want you to hear the angels speak to me through here.’

  “And Kevin looked at him and said, ‘Phillip, you and the angels get out of here. I’m busy.’ ”

  When he tried to demonstrate it to Maria Christenson, who was still wary after his previous outburst about masturbation, she told him to keep their relationship just business.

  “He said that I was going to be blown away,” Maria recalled. “I was going to fall over backwards when he’d shown me the black box he had in the car. But I never let him, when he wanted to bring it in. So he just kind of backed off then. He was getting too weird.”