by Ian Todd
“Fuck’s sake, if it’s no the very wan that Ah said wid be back here again, the last time he stood there, and the time before that.”
Paul hid looked at the inspector. Billy Liar wis well-named, he remembered thinking tae himsel. He’d fitted up mair guys in the toon than any tailor ever hid. The jail wis full ae innocent guys that this basturt hid planted stuff oan. Every time him and The Mankys hid goat caught and huckled doon tae Central, they’d aw prayed that Billy Liar widnae be staunin at the desk wae the charge sheet.
“Ah’m totally innocent. Ma only crime is trying tae go straight, looking fur a job,” Paul hid hissed through sore teeth.
“Aye, and ma maw’s Cinderella, so she is. Read oot the charges, Sergeant McPhee.”
“That oan the early hours ae Monday the seventh ae July nineteen sixty nine, you, Paul McBride, aged fifteen, temporarily residing at Wester Achnahanat Croft, Ardgay, Ross-shire, wae the aid ae others, still tae be apprehended, did forcibly kidnap and remove against her will, Lady Saba Blair MacDonald, age fifteen, the only child and daughter ae The Duke and Duchess ae Kyle, fae her family hame ae Culrain Castle, Culrain, Ross-shire. Anything ye say will be taken doon and may be held against ye in a court ae law,” The Stalker hid droned.
“Hiv ye anything tae say, McBride? If ye tell us where she is, it’ll go good against ye when ye’re up in court,” the lying prick hid asked him.
“Aye?”
“Whit?”
“When will Ah get tae speak tae ma lawyer, Graham Portoy, or hiv ye jist furgotten tae tell me ma rights?” Paul hid spat at them.
The second journey up tae the desk hid been a bit mair civil than the first time. He’d only been hauf dragged and slapped aw the way. Paul felt his eyes fill up wae tears as he thought aboot it. He left the road and went across and sat oan a wee dyke and looked across the Kyle. The pain and hurt he wis feeling wis beyond anything he’d suffered at the hauns ae the bizzies. He found it difficult tae stoap snivelling. He wiped the running snotters away fae his nose. That second trip tae the front desk hid also been the first time that he’d clocked Swein McTavish since the morning ootside the hotel, in Lochcarron, a million years ago.
“Right, ya cheeky insolent piece ae shit, ye. Fuck knows how ye’ve wangled it, bit The Duke’s daughter his turned up, safe and sound,” Billy Liar hid announced tae him, looking as sick as a hinging judge wae a not-guilty verdict oan his hauns.
Paul looked aboot at the uniformed faces, staunin in a semi-circle roond the desk. They aw hid a pale green, sickly look oan they coupons ae theirs.
“So, Ah’m free tae go, am Ah?” Paul demanded, a wee smirk appearing oan that kisser ae his.
“Ah never said that. Naw, ye’ll hiv tae answer tae the charge ae assaulting Sergeant McPhee when he arrested ye.”
“Ah never laid a finger oan him,” Paul howled, that smile ae his being replaced by the smiles ae aw the uniforms staunin roond aboot him, except fur Swein McTavish.
“Listen, ye wur seen tae strike Sergeant McPhee when he confronted ye, oan the wee bridge up at Earlston Avenue. We’ve goat witnesses, so we hiv. Is that no right, boys?”
“Aye,” a chorus ae lying tadgers aw sang at wance…apart fae wan dissenter.
“I never saw the boy strike Sergeant McPhee and I was right behind him at the time of the arrest,” The Highland Fox hid said, as aw the grins ae the bizzies froze.
“Er, kin Ah speak tae ye a minute, Swein?” Billy Liar hid asked, walking across tae the other side ae the reception wae his haun oan the shoulder ae the Highland’s finest.
Paul hidnae known whit wis being said, bit it didnae sound as if it wis a polite conversation. Efter a few minutes they’d returned tae the desk.
“Let the basturt go,” Billy Liar hid growled stiffly.
“Whit?” a chorus ae voices hid screamed.
“Ye heard me…turn him loose,” Billy Liar hid croaked, jist aboot bursting intae tears, as Paul lifted up his hauns tae The Stalker tae unlock the hauncuffs that wur digging intae his wrists.
“And Ah want tae know where Ah kin collect ma dug fae,” Paul hid asked, grinning fae ear tae ear.
“Yer dug? That mangy basturt that put five stitches intae that arse ae mine? Ye’ve nae chance, ya prick, ye. He’s getting put doon first thing this morning, as soon as the vet arrives. He’s a danger tae the public. He’s nae gaun anywhere. That dug’s as deid as a Dodo,” The Stalker hid spat back at him, a big grin reappearing on that coupon ae his as he unlocked the hauncuffs.
Paul hid pleaded tae see Wan-eye fur wan last time, bit the basturts hid slung him oot oan tae the street efter telling him tae fuck aff.
Paul shook his heid in grief as he jumped aff the wee dyke and carried oan up the strath towards the croft. He thought aboot the panic he’d felt at the train station when there’d been nae sign ae Saba. Apart fae the odd straggler rushing forward through the ticket collector’s gate, she’d been naewhere tae be seen. Jist as he hid gied up hope ae seeing her alive, he’d heard his name being called oot and then he’d clocked her red hair. She’d come running across fae the left haun side, the same side ae the station fae where he’d climbed o’er the railings earlier. The ticket guy hid waved her through, withoot checking her ticket.
“Fur fuck’s sake, Saba. Where the hell hiv ye been?”
“I’m sorry, Paul. I was trying to contact my grandmother, to let her know I was on my way, but it was difficult to get through,” she’d panted.
“Right, get oan the bloody train before Ah hiv a heart attack,” he’d telt her, opening a carriage door and slinging in her bag before pushing Saba in efter it.
“So, ur ye getting met at the other end then?” Paul hid asked, as Saba leaned oot ae the carriage door windae.
“Yes, The Dowager is in London, but I spoke to my mother’s maid, Clarice. I couldn’t get a word in edgewise…she was so upset and relieved. She’s from the Deep South in the States, therefore it’s very difficult to make out what she’s saying most of the time. I think she said something about my mother coming to Scotland. I told her I couldn’t hang about, as the train was about to leave the station. I told her to meet me in London. If you thought your accent was bad, you should hear hers.”
“Ach, well, at least ye’re here noo. Did ye get the bus okay?”
“Yes. I gave Kathleen Mr Mackay’s money. Where were you? I…we…were sick, worrying about you,” Saba hid scolded.
“Ah hid tae dae a wee message that took longer than Ah thought it wid,” he’d replied defensively, as the train guard blew his whistle fae the back ae the train towards the driver who wis hinging oot the engine windae at the ticket gate end.
“Paul?”
“Aye?”
“Thank you,” Saba hid said, stretching further oot ae the windae and gieing him a kiss oan they lips ae his.
“Whit wis that fur?” he’d asked her, surprised.
“Just so that you can always say that you’ve been kissed by a real Lady,” she’d said, smiling, as the train slowly started tae move forwards.
“Hoi, wait till Ah tell aw the boys Ah’ve spent the night in bed wae that real Lady. That’s a mair impressive line than a kiss, so it is, although, the basturts won’t believe me,” Paul hid shouted, as her face moved further away doon the platform and the train gathered speed.
Efter the train hid left the station, Paul hid nipped back the way he’d come and hid gone and goat the car. Efter leaving the car in the multi-storey car park in Montrose Street, him and Wan-eye hid heided aff up tae Roystonhill tae see if he could track doon Tony and the rest ae The Mankys. He’d known full-well that they probably widnae be living up there, bit he’d been heiding up tae a good pal ae theirs called Joe O’Hara, or Baby Huey, as he wis known. Baby wid know how Paul could track The Mankys doon. Baby wis a big fat basturt, wae a heart ae gold, who could clear a street ae hyenas jist wae his presence. He wis only aboot fifteen years auld…the same age as Paul…bit awready The Big Man hid him oan the lower rungs ae the payrol
l. Although he worked fur The Big Man, Paul hid nae fear ae Baby telling Pat Molloy where he wis. Being paid and being a pal wur two different things. Tony always said that The Big Man didnae understaun that ye couldnae buy real friendship the way that ye could buy somewan’s loyalty. Money wid always fuck ye up the arse at the end ae the day, although it hid never stoapped Paul and his pals fae always wanting it. Mind you, he thought tae himsel, being nabbed by the bizzies hid denied him the chance tae put whit Tony’d said tae the test, ae Baby hivving tae make a choice between friendship versus paymaster. That wid need tae wait fur another day.
Oan the train ride up north, Paul hid spent hauf an hour in the cludgie sorting oot Innes’s five hunner quid. He’d gied his sister Kathleen fifty quid fur aw the hassle he’d brought tae her door, when he went up tae collect his bag and his two envelopes full ae dosh. She’d burst intae tears and telt him no tae be so stupid. She wid be happy wae a tenner and anyway, she’d said, he’d need the money tae try and start a new life, noo that he wis free. He’d insisted she take the fifty, pointing oot tae her that, efter gieing Innes his money and gieing her fifty quid, he still hid o’er seventy quid tae himsel, if ye included whit wis left ae his boxing match winnings. She’d burst oot greeting again and telt him she’d use forty three quid ae it tae pay aff the arrears she owed The Corporation. It wid mean her, Jimmy and the weans wid qualify fur a Corporation hoose again, insteid ae the expensive damp private rented wan they wur living in. She’d telt him that the Swiss Army knife that Whitey and Innes hid gied him as a birthday present wis in his bag, in case he ever needed tae fix a horse’s hoof. He hidnae been too sure where that wan hid come fae. She’d also said that she hidnae telt Jimmy aboot her visit fae Pat Molloy and his bears earlier oan.
“Ah widnae want tae worry him,” she’d said, wae a wee faint smile.
Jist before Paul’s train hid reached Perth, the guy sitting beside him hid goat up tae leave. As he wis leaving the carriage, he’d turned tae Paul.
“Here ye go, son, Ah’ve read it.”
It hid been that day’s copy ae The Glesga Echo. Paul hid unfolded the newspaper, exposing the front page. The headline hid screamed oot at him ‘RE-UNITED, wae a sub-caption saying ‘Duke and Duchess flying south tae join Lady Saba.’ The main picture oan the front page wis ae The Duke and Duchess fae the night before, staunin smiling, facing the cameras, jist before they boarded a Cessna plane that hid been sent up by Lord Denby tae Fearn Airstrip, jist ootside Tain, tae collect them. Even Harold McMillan, the prime minister hid been quoted as saying he wis glad that Saba wis safe and well. Efter the blurb, it hid telt the reader tae go tae pages three, four and five fur mair news oan the story. Paul hid turned straight tae page three. Saba hid been quoted as saying that she’d goat the bus fae Ardgay tae Inverness and then tae Aberdeen. She’d stayed o’er night in Aberdeen, before heiding tae Glesga oan the bus. She’d claimed that she’d been oan her lonesome. Her Ma and Da hid been quoted as saying that they wur glad she wis safe and they looked forward tae meeting up wae her. The Duchess hid said that her maid hid received a phone call tae say she wis oan her way and that the Duchess Dowager, alang wae Saba’s parents wid be at King’s Cross Station in London tae meet her aff the train. There hid been another article spread across the whole ae page four, highlighting the history ae the family and showing pictures ae aw their wealth and property, which it said, Saba wid inherit someday. Paul hid particularly enjoyed the page five article by a Mary Marigold, who’d slagged aff the Glesga Police fur making a meal oot ae Saba being kidnapped and wis demanding tae know how much money hid been wasted oan putting the so-called super cop, ‘Sergeant McPhee, aka The Stalker,’ aff tae wander aboot the Western Highlands like a lost sheep. She’d quoted some chief superintendent in Inverness, who’d said that they’d always made it clear that the force wur treating Lady Saba’s disappearance as a missing person’s investigation and that nae criminal links hid been proved, despite this viewpoint being challenged by some in the central belt. It hid stated that the local sergeant, Swein McTavish, The Highland Fox, hid concluded, rightly, that the Ross and Sutherland Constabulary should doongrade the investigation tae a missing person, which they’d done. It hid also stated that The Highland Fox wis unavailable fur comment at the time ae going tae press. Paul hid laughed oot loud at that last bit. He hidnae goat the chance tae thank McTavish fur saving his arse oan the trumped-up assault charge. He felt a wee bit guilty aboot slagging him aff tae Innes when he went wae Innes tae the courthoose in Tain. Innes wis right, he wisnae a bad guy efter aw.
As Paul hid flicked through the paper, he’d come across a tiny article oan page thirty seven, beside the green fingers section. The wee heidline hid read ‘Fire At Boat Builders’ and the article hid gone oan tae say that a mystery fire hid completely burned a boat builders yard in Inveraray, Argyle-shire, tae the ground, wae everything in it. It hid quoted a distraught Master Boat Builder, Mr Robert Campbell, as saying that the family business he’d inherited fae his father only two years before wisnae insured. He wis facing financial ruin and wid hiv tae pay substantial sums tae creditors and those who hid paid deposits oan boats which hid been nearing completion. Argyle-shire police wur appealing fur information oan the whereabouts ae a white Ford Cortina saloon car that hid been seen in the area at the time.
Chapter Eighty One
“Paul, Paul, quick, they’re here again,” Whitey called up the stairs.
Paul jumped oot ae bed, dragged oan his troosers and tripped o’er Wan-eye, who wis lying stretched oot across the doorway ae his bedroom. By the time he goat doon the stairs and oot ae the croft hoose, the car wis gone. The only sound he heard wis the car engine disappearing in the distance.
“Ur ye sure it wis them, Whitey?”
“Oh aye, laddie. A fancy blue car with three young laddies in it. Don’t worry, I’m sure they’ll be back in about an hour, if yesterday is anything to go by,” she replied.
Paul sat ootside wae Whitey and Innes, who wur sitting basking in the sunshine, wae Innes taking his weight oan tae the cheek that wisnae full ae buckshot holes. He sat lopsidedly and wis gieing oot a wee wince every noo and again if he furgoat aboot they wounds ae his and leaned back tae let oot a chuckle aboot something being said. Tim and Wan-eye lay at their feet. Innes wis still harping oan aboot whit a gentleman Robert Campbell, The Master Boat Builder wis and kept oan asking Paul tae recoont how delighted he wis when Paul turned up wae The Dignity. Paul sat looking at the pair ae them, wae the dugs at their feet, and smiled. He’d arrived back at the croft the efternoon before and haunded o’er the five hunner quid tae Innes. Whitey and Innes hid sat and stared at the bundle ae notes fur ages, no saying a word…clearly scared tae touch it in case it bit them. Before he’d entered the croft hoose, he’d noticed that Innes hid painted numbers oan tae the blank space oan that auld Landy ae his where Paul hid removed the number plates aff ae it. Innes hid been fair chuffed when Paul haunded o’er the auld wans he’d taken when he’d left. He also noticed that the wheels wur back oan it and it wis parked across at the barn. Innes explained that he’d goat Packer up tae put oan the wheels while he’d installed the rotor erm. Packer hid taken Innes and Whitey oot oan a wee drive the day before. They’d gone up tae Croick Church.
Paul looked across at Tim and Wan-eye. The pup’s eye infection wis totally healed. Paul wondered if Wan-eye realised jist how close he’d come tae being put doon. Probably no, he thought tae himsel, looking across at Tim wae his shortened tail and battle-scarred face. When Paul hid been lying in his kip the night before, he’d been awakened by the sound ae a car engine. He’d been too knackered tae get up and see who it wis and hid started tae drift aff tae sleep again, when he wis suddenly wakened by Innes and Whitey’s loud and excited voices. Twenty seconds later, he’d heard pounding feet bounding up the stairs and Wan-eye hid covered the flair space between the door and Paul’s bed wae wan big leap, straight oan tae him as he wis attempting tae get up tae see whit aw the commotion wis aboot. He’d felt a
wee bit embarrassed at hivving burst intae tears when he’d telt Innes and Whitey that Wan-eye hid been put doon fur biting The Stalker. The three ae them hid sat weeping, apologising tae each other, as they sat roond the table. Wance Wan-eye hid settled doon, Paul hid goat up and gone doonstairs tae find oot whit the score wis. Swein McTavish hid jist drapped Wan-eye aff. He’d explained that, although he’d wanted tae get back up the north, he’d hung aboot the polis station in Glesga, being ignored by everywan, tae speak tae the vet when he came tae deal wae the dug. The vet hid telt him that he hated putting doon a perfectly healthy animal and hid been persuaded tae let McTavish take Wan-eye back up tae the Highlands, efter he’d explained the circumstances in which the dug, through nae fault ae its ain, hid come tae be in a pen in Central. McTavish hid sworn that the dug wid never be back in Glesga again. Between the two ae them, they’d managed tae sneak Wan-eye intae the back ae McTavish’s Landy fur the long journey back up north.
Paul wis jist aboot tae tell Innes again, fur the umpteenth time, aboot how delighted the Master Boat Builder hid been tae cough up five hunner smackers fur the boat, when Wan-eye and Tim’s heids suddenly shot up aff the ground. A light blue Series Wan Ford Escort came speeding alang the road and skidded tae a stoap at the tap ae the wee curved drive in a cloud ae dust. Paul stood up. The driver, Joe McManus, opened his door and stepped oot. Tony Gucci walked roond fae the passenger side and joined Joe. The baith ae them stood wae their erms folded across their chests, wae big cheesy grins oan their coupons, leaning back against the wing ae the car. He could see why Innes and Whitey said they looked strange. The baith ae them wur skinheids noo and they stood there, wearing braces and wae whit people wur calling bovver boots back in Glesga, oan they feet ae theirs. When Paul hid been back in the toon, he’d noticed a few guys running aboot dressed jist like them, although this pair wurnae wearing black Crombie coats wae red silk hankies sticking oot ae the tap ae the chest pockets, like the wans he’d clocked. Johnboy Taylor slithered oot ae the passenger seat oan the opposite side ae the car and used the open windae sill as a seat. Johnboy gied him a two fingered wave.