by Ian Todd
“Did I not say they were pretty strange looking laddies?” Innes muttered.
“Ah’ll be back shortly,” Paul telt them, heiding up tae the car.
Innes, Whitey, and the two dugs jist sat motionless, watching Paul make his way towards them. When he reached them, they saw the boys crowd roond him, slapping him oan the back and laughing. He goat intae the back seat and efter daeing a three-point turn, the car sped aff in the direction ae Rosehall.
“Where the hell hiv ye been? We’ve been hinging aboot here since yesterday,” Tony Gucci said fae the front seat.
“Ah’ve been doon the road fur a few days. How the hell did ye find me?”
“Sarah May Todd telt us where ye wur hiding. She said she spoke tae ye when that band ae hers played up here a while ago at some dance,” Joe piped up.
“Oh, right. Aye, that wis last month, so it wis. So, whit aboot yersels then? Ur youse aw free or whit?”
“They ur, bit Ah’m still in Oakbank, or Ah wis, until they tadgers picked me up yesterday morning,” Johnboy replied, wae a cheeky grin.
“Whit, they sprung ye oot?” Paul laughed, looking at him.
“Aye, that’s me fucked noo. Ah’ve been warned that if Ah step oot ae line wan mair time, they’re gonnae ship me aff tae the closed block. So much fur yer best pals looking efter ye, eh?”
“So, whit aboot Silent then? Where’s he?”
“We think he’s still in Thistle Park. We’re gonnae see if we kin get word tae him, wance we’re back in the toon, tae see if he wants us tae come and get him,” Joe answered, taking a bend too fast.
“Of course he wants us tae go and get him. Look at Johnboy. He’s delighted, so he is,” Tony said, as they aw cackled.
“Right, where tae noo, Paul? Ah’ve no goat a bloody clue where Ah’m gaun oan these wee shitey roads,” Joe said, jist missing the arse ae a sheep that managed tae get oot ae his way.
“Right, ye’ll come tae a wee river soon. The road goes aw the way through it and so should you. When ye get tae the junction, turn right. Look fur a sign that says Shin Falls. Turn up there and we kin hiv a blether.”
Paul wis chuffed tae see them. It hid been months since he’d last been in their company. When they reached the falls, they piled oot ae the car and went across and sat oan a big boulder, overlooking the rushing water. Efter aboot two minutes, Joe and Johnboy started a competition oan who could hit a leaping salmon wae a stane.
“Fuck’s sake, did ye see that wan?” Johnboy shouted, as a thirty pounder disappeared in amongst the white froth.
Tony and Paul sat watching the pair ae them, withoot much being said.
“So, whit’s been happening then, Paul?” Tony eventually asked, jist as the other two came across and sat doon, watching Paul wae interest.
Paul spoke fur aboot an hour, explaining whit hid happened, occasionally being interrupted by the three ae them asking who done whit and where. They laughed at some ae his story and wanted tae know why the fuck he hidnae robbed Mr Whippy when he’d the chance, efter he’d come across him up a mountain, in the middle ae naewhere. They aw scowled at the mention ae The Stalker and Joe went intae a mega rant aboot him. They didnae seem too interested in The Gardener’s Daughter, other than tae ask the obvious question.
“Did ye shag her?” asked Johnboy.
“Naw, bit Ah kipped in the same bed as her.”
“And ye never goat yer Nat King Cole? Fuck, ye’ve been locked up fur too long, Paul,” Joe chimed.
“Ah goat masel a girlfriend while Ah’ve been crashing up here, though.”
“Did ye shag that wan then?” Johnboy asked.
“Naw, bit Ah wis winching her fur a while,” Paul replied, thinking aboot Morven fur the first time since he’d goat back.
“Ye’re no exactly in the same league as that dirty lucky foreign basturt…whit’s his name, Tony?”
“Casanova?”
“Aye, Casanova,” Joe repeated.
“It could be worse, Ah’m still a fucking virgin,” Mr Honest Johnboy mused oot loud.
“That’s no whit Ah heard, bum-boy,” Joe said.
“Anyway, whit dae ye think the score is wae The Big Man noo, Tony? He obviously thinks youse wur behind him no getting his paws oan The Duke’s daughter. He’s no gonnae be happy when he finds oot that she’s back tae her maw and da and he’s missed a buck or two.”
“Fuck him. We’ll cross that bridge when we get tae it,” Tony scoffed dismissively, staring at the thundering water running doon the Shin.
“Why dae ye no jist tell him she escaped and The Duke and the polis are keeping it quiet as they don’t want tae admit we shafted the pricks,” Johnboy suggested, lying sprawled across the boulder oan his back, looking up at the sky and chewing oan a bit ae grass.
Paul, Tony and Joe jist looked at him and burst oot laughing.
“See? Where there’s a will, there’s a way, as ma auld granny often used tae say,” Tony said, satisfied that the problem hid been solved.
“Er, ur ye really sure aboot that wan, Tony?” Joe asked doubtfully.
“Whit?” Tony asked him, as Johnboy sat up and looked across at Joe.
“That auld granny ae yours, the wan wae the wee tufty beard who smelled ae cat’s pish? Ah seem tae remember that she always said ‘Where there’s a free gill, ye’ll always find ma erm attached tae it.’ At least, that’s ma memory, as she felt ma arse every time Ah walked past her, the saucy auld mare that she wis,” Joe recalled tae fits ae laughter.
“Naw, she only used that wan oan special occasions like weddings, christenings and funerals,” Tony slung in.
They sat watching Joe creep up oan a bee that hid landed oan a flower.
“Goat ye, ya basturt, ye!” Joe shouted gleefully, as the branch he hid in his haun obliterated the bee and the flower it wis suckling oot ae.
“Whit the fuck did ye dae that fur, Joe, ya prick, ye?” Paul demanded.
“Whit? It wis a fucking wasp. They basturts sting ye, so they dae.”
“Yer arse wis a wasp…that wis a bee, so it wis,” Paul shouted back.
“So?”
“So, they help plants and flowers tae grow, ya eejit, ye. Withoot them, ye widnae hiv any honey, ya tottie, ye.”
“Listen, Dr Doolittle, Ah don’t gie two tits whether they’re bees, wasps or bloody elephants. If they come near me, they’re gonnae cop it, good and proper.”
“Hoi, Joe, don’t try and justify yersel, ya fucking murdering basturt,” Johnboy shot at him.
“That’s a long way tae go tae get here, via Aberdeen, Tony. So, whit’s yer thinking aboot when ye go back doon the road then?” Paul asked, as Johnboy and Joe arsed aboot across at the falls.
“Provi Cheque Men,” Tony replied, eyes lighting up like torches.
“Aye, and?”
“We need tae bring everywan thegither.”
“Silent?”
“Him tae.”
“When Ah wis back doon the road, Ah wis surprised tae see aw the spare ground where tenements used tae be in the Toonheid. Even though we’ve only been away fur a few months, the place his started tae hiv a ghost-toon look aboot it. There wis nothing bit big bonfires sitting in the middle ae where the buildings hid been. The demolishers wur burning anything that could burn.”
“Furget the Toonheid, Paul. The Toonheid is gone…it’s finished. It’s no there noo…at least no oor Toonheid. We hiv tae accept it and move oan tae pastures new. Ah cannae wait tae get back and get tore in.”
“Tae who?”
“Remember that skinny twat, Skinny Malinky, the Provi cheque man?”
“Whit aboot him?”
“Masel and Joe robbed him recently up in Petershill Road in Springburn. He pished his troosers when Joe goat a grip ae him. He pleaded wae us no tae hurt him, in exchange fur a wee bit ae priceless information.”
“Oh?”
“Ye’re gonnae love this wan, so ye ur. We’ve goat aw the info oan aw the Provi cheque men that operated in the Toonhei
d fae when we grew up, including where they’re working noo.”
“Ye’re kidding me.”
“He gied us their car makes, numbers and aw their routes. We hid tae wait a few days fur the list, bit he came up wae the goods. We’ve struck the mother lode, Paul. We’re gonnae be rolling in it and we need yersel and Silent there wae us. God, if only Skull wis still here, he wid’ve pished himsel at the prospect, eh?”
Silence.
“Remember that big fat prick, Bawheid Baxter? When we telt Johnboy aboot Skinny Malinky’s information, the first thing he wanted tae know, wis whether Bawheid wis oan the list.”
“How come?”
“He wis the wan that nearly goat Johnboy’s maw chipped oot ae her hoose twice yearly through warrant sales when he wis growing up. He’ll hiv a bloody heart attack when he feels Johnboy’s size nine up that big fat crack ae his, so he will…they aw will,” Tony said, as the baith ae them smiled. “The only fly in the ointment though, is that we’ll need tae stay well clear ae they Simpson brothers o’er in Possil. If we keep well clear ae them and stick tae Milton, Colston, Springburn, Burmulloch and Balornock, there shouldnae be any bother.”
Paul and Tony sat watching Johnboy and Joe, chasing each other wae branches they’d wrenched aff a tree. Paul smiled, as he watched them. He’d known Tony and Joe aw his life. They’d played in the same puddles in the same back courts ae the Toonheid when they could barely walk, while their maws hid stood chattering fur hours at the back closemooths, smoking fag efter fag, only stoapping every noo and again tae take a breather and tae shout at them tae stoap fucking aboot in the dirty water. Johnboy hid been a later addition tae The Mankys, joining them when he wis aboot ten. He wisnae as daft as he looked and kept them aw gaun wae that sense ae humour ae his. Paul missed Silent, who wis still stuck in Thistle Park, bit maist of aw, he missed Skull, who should’ve been fucking aboot in front ae him jist noo, play-fencing wae Joe and Johnboy. He thought back tae the previous Christmas, when they’d aw been in each other’s company, holed up in a tenement doon in McAslin Street fur weeks o’er Christmas, planning a come-back fur whit hid happened tae Skull. The road trip he’d jist completed wae The Gardener’s Daughter hid gied him an opportunity tae think aboot his life…when he wisnae arguing wae her, that wis. It seemed tae him, that aw during their lives, Tony, Joe, Johnboy, Silent and Skull hid been fighting against the people who they believed wur the enemy. He couldnae remember ever discussing wae any ae them how they’d come up wae who the enemy wis when they wur growing up, other than wanting tae hiv a go at anywan who tried tae haud them back fae daeing whit they wanted, whether it wis in school, in the chapel or oot oan the streets. They’d never fallen oot wae each other, although there hid been plenty ae greeting, especially fae Skull, who’d been in the tap ae the first division when it came tae whinging. He looked across at Tony, sitting there, wae a grin splashed across his coupon, watching the antics ae Joe and Johnboy. He thought aboot Skull again. Oan the way doon tae the falls, Johnboy hid telt Paul in the car that Skull hid been sitting waiting in the solitary confinement cell that they’d slung him intae efter he’d been returned tae Thistle Park. He said that Skull hid found his Celtic tammy that he’d lost in the cabin fire. Johnboy said he looked really happy and hid telt him that he’d be getting in that night, so he couldnae hing aboot.
“It’s aw o’er wae noo, Paul. We kin aw move oan. Skull’s where he wants tae be,” Tony hid said, as the other two nodded.
Paul hid awready packed aw his gear, which wisnae much really. He’d telt Innes and Whitey that he still intended tae heid back tae the toon. He’d explained that the big city wis his hame and although he felt a strong pull tae stay in the Highlands, he didnae think the slow pace ae life suited somewan like him. The pair ae them hid been smiling through they tears ae theirs when he’d made his announcement.
“I think you’re wrong, laddie. You’re exactly what the Highlands need. Strong-willed young men, who are not afraid to stand up to the big landowners, who still have people like us chained to the yoke. Without people like you, all our fight against the injustices will have been in vain and we’ll all have died for nothing,” Innes hid said, lighting his cracked clay pipe in a cloud ae smoke.
“Innes, that’s terrible. You can’t lay the responsibility for whether the old traditions in the Highlands will die or not, on someone like Paul, or any of the other young people for that matter. Maybe it’s us that need to forget the past and get on with our life, or what is left of it, and let the young people get on with theirs.”
Paul thought aboot The Gardener’s Daughter and smiled. She wisnae that bad, despite that family ae hers and maybe she hid been serious when she’d stated that she wis the next generation and that she’d dae things differently tae that da ae hers. He still wisnae sure that she goat it though. Innes hid telt him it wis aw aboot blood.
“Where do ye think the proverb ‘A leopard never changes its spots’ comes from, laddie? People…dynasties like the MacDonalds, will never change, as long as they have a pulse left in them. God forbid they ever get control of the air that we breathe.”
Paul thought aboot the crofters eking oot a living in the strath and elsewhere…still suffering at the hauns ae their tormentors fae o’er a hunner or two hunner years ago, wae the auld sores still weeping. He thought aboot Morven, whose attitude seemed tae be ‘that’s the way life is and we’re not going to change it because that’s how it’s always been,’ even though he knew she didnae really mean that. Deep doon, he knew that she knew whit wis right fae wrong, just and unjust and that come the day…if it ever did come…she’d choose the right side. He now knew that she wis far too good fur somewan like him, even though she’d probably hiv something tae say aboot him believing that. Saba hid been right when she’d pointed oot that he’d fuck it up if he stayed in the strath and Morven wid be the wan tae cop the maist grief. George and Cameron Sellar wid see tae that. Innes and Whitey wur getting oan, despite seeming tae be fit as fiddles. Even in the short space ae time that he’d lived wae them, he’d noticed them slowing doon. He wis shocked tae see that Innes hid aged since being shot wae the poachers’ retreat and Whitey looked terribly tired, hobbling aboot wae her fit still in a bandage efter the damage inflicted by the rusty nail. He didnae want tae bring any mair hassle tae their door, despite whit Innes might say. Innes hid asked him wan time when they wur oot poaching, why the hell he wis fighting fur nae reward in the city when he could be fighting fur everything in the Highlands. Paul hid laughed when Innes hid said it.
“Christ, Innes, ye’ve been fighting aw yer life and ye’re still scratching aboot oan a postage stamp. When Ah’ve put in the years that ye’ve put in, Ah’m hoping tae hiv a bit mair than this,” he’d responded cruelly.
“That’s my point, laddie,” he’d replied, wae kindness in his voice, which Paul knew he didnae deserve.
“Right, boys, ur youse ready tae hit the road?” Tony shouted, breaking intae his thoughts.
“Too true,” Johnboy turned and shouted back, jist as Joe whacked him oan the side ae the heid wae his leafy branch.
“Duck!” Joe shouted efter it landed wae a smack, sending Johnboy intae a frenzied howling wail ae pain that made them aw burst oot laughing as Joe tried tae convince him that it hid been an accident.
Chapter Eighty Two
Innes, Whitey, Tim, Wan-eye…and Morven looked up at the sound ae the car zooming alang the strath. Morven hid only jist heard earlier that morning that Paul wis back, when she’d bumped intae Swein McTavish, who’d been up at the castle, meeting wae Mr Riddrie. Efter Swein hid left, she’d gone and informed Mr Riddrie that she wisnae feeling too well due tae ‘wummin’s trouble,’ and efter a bit of huffing, puffing and tut-tutting, he’d slipped his pocket watch oot ae his waistcoat and looked at it before agreeing that she could take time aff. She’d run through Balblair Wood, in the maid’s uniform that she’d been telt tae wear since the day that Saba disappeared, and hid heided straight fur the croft. She’d won
dered why Paul hidnae goat in touch as soon as he’d goat back. She’d thought tae hersel that he must’ve been tired, bit then she’d goat angry. If the shoe hid been oan the other fit, wid she no hiv goat in touch wae him straight away? Another strange thing hid happened the previous night. It hid been a fluke that she’d picked up the telephone at the castle. Saba hid telephoned her fae the train station in Glesgie. She’d hardly been able tae hear whit Saba wis saying because ae the noise ae the echoing voice coming o’er the tannoy speakers, calling passengers fur the last time, as the train wis jist aboot tae leave the station.
“Saba, you’re safe, thank God!”
“Morven, thank God it’s you. Listen, I don’t have much time. I’m fine. Listen…don’t interrupt me. The reason I’m calling is that Paul will be heading back to the strath to collect his things. If you want him to stay, you’ll need to be there to intercept him. I think he’s already made up his mind though that he’s heading back to Glasgow, but it’s worth a go. Perhaps if he sees you, he’ll realise his mistake. He’s worth fighting for. I’m sorry, I’ll need to go, my train is about to leave,” Saba hid shouted, hinging up.
Efter aw the times that Saba hid insisted that she’d be better aff no seeing him, that he wis trouble wae a capital T, and then that phone call? Whit hid made Saba change her mind, Morven wondered. And then there wis George and Cameron Sellar.
“If that Lost Boy ever shows his face around here again, we’ll be here waiting for him. It would be better for you to accept that you’re one of us, instead of getting any nonsense into that pretty head of yours, Morven,” George Sellar hid snarled at her the efternoon efter Saba and Paul disappeared.