Scandal

by Heather Cullman

  Amy giggled. "From what my papa says, you are indeed correct, Caro. Why only last night he said that Julia's father is rather less popular with the other gentlemen of the ton for the dissatisfaction his example has bred in their wives' breasts." Another giggle. "Nonetheless, for all that his lordship's gesture was romantic to the extreme, I must confess that it is Julia whom I envy. After all, she is marrying the dashing Gideon Harwood on the morrow."

  "Mr. Harwood is a fine man. Pleasing in both speech and manner," Caroline acknowledged with a decisive nod.

  "And worth a plum," added Helene. "With his wealth, he will be able to give Julia everything she desires."

  "He is also exceedingly gallant," contributed Mina. Her face grew wistful then. "Oh, Julia! I do envy you. What I would not give to have such a gallant man fall in love with me and whisk me off to the altar."

  Julia, who sat on a small tapestry-upholstered settee watching her friends admire her finery, smiled at Mina's starry-eyed yearning for romance. Genuinely hoping that what she was about to say would prove true, she replied, "It will happen to you, dear. I am certain it shall. Someday you will meet a man who is everything you desire, and he will sweep you off your feet and love you the way you deserve to be loved."

  "Just like you and Mr. Harwood," murmured Mina, her expression dreamy as she contemplated the rosy future her friend predicted. "What a wonderful life you shall have, Julia, marrying a man who adores you so. You must love each other to distraction to be wedding after such a short courtship."

  "Yes," Julia said, though, of course, she lied. She did not love Gideon, nor he her. As for their future, well, since that day in the park, when they had agreed to be friends, she had discovered that he was rather more pleasant than she had first thought, and had thus begun to believe that they might rub along tolerably well together. Of course, rubbing along tolerably well was a far cry from the wedded bliss Mina envisioned for them. Nonetheless, it was a happier existence than she had dared to hope for when she had first entered into the bargain.

  "Loving you as he does, he is bound to give you a generous allowance," the ever-mercenary Helene said, seating herself next to Julia on the settee.

  Caroline sniffed. "Is that all you ever think about, Helene, money?"

  Helene shrugged one shoulder. "What else is there? Though, of course, I shan't take a fortune unless there is a grand title attached to it."

  "We shall all wed men of fortune, and most of them will no doubt be of noble birth. After all, it is our duty and right to marry well," Caroline declared, settling in one of the three pale gold damask chairs that had been arranged opposite the settee in anticipation of the women's visit. "However, should I have to choose between a wealthy commoner with intelligence and wit, and a titled dullard, I would take the commoner any day."

  "I want a handsome husband, like Mr. Harwood," Amy said, inelegantly plopping herself into the chair on Caroline's left, "though I doubt I shall get my wish." She shook her head, sighing as if beset by the greatest of tragedies. "Papa seems to have an unreasonable prejudice against any suitor who is under the age of eighty and does not resemble a toad."

  "Well, I wish for a kind man." This was from Mina, who now helped herself to a slice of trifle from the refreshment table a servant had placed in the room a half hour earlier. "Though a title, a handsome face, and wit are all fine things, they are worthless if the man possessing them is not kind."

  "Mina is correct in that kindness is the most important quality of all in a husband, for without kindness there can be no love in a marriage," Caroline conceded, giving Mina's arm a fond squeeze as the girl took the vacant chair on her right. "Our dearest Julia is very fortunate in that Mr. Harwood possesses all the qualities we deem important in a husband."

  "Save for a title, of course," Helene reminded them.

  "Yes," Julia replied, stunned to discover that what Caroline said was true. Gideon Harwood was indeed wealthy, witty, intelligent, handsome . . . and kind. Above all, he was kind.

  As the other women launched into a friendly debate over which gentlemen of the ton possessed the required qualities for a husband, Julia contemplated her betrothed's unexpectedly benevolent nature.

  His was the type of kindness that warmed the soul, the simple, humble sort made up not of grand gestures, but of small, thoughtful acts performed solely for the pleasure they brought the recipient. To her surprise and gratitude, her sisters had of late become regular beneficiaries of his altruistic largesse.

  Since learning of Maria and Jemima's interest in animals, Gideon now often brought Jagtar and Kesin with him when he called, each time asking that the younger Barham daughters be invited downstairs to play with the queer little creature. Maria and Jemima were, of course, thrilled, and not only by the slow loris. That their future brother-in-law should find them worthy company made them smile in a way that brought tears to Julia's eyes for the fierceness of the joy it gave her to see their gladness. As for Aurelia, since the request for their presence came from Gideon, she naturally could not deny it, though Julia knew that it must pain the awful woman to no end to see her charges so happy.

  And that was not all Gideon had done for them. There was the time he had taken them all to see a particularly fine traveling menagerie, after which he had treated them to cake and ices. Then there were the books he brought, the first being the promised one on the beasts of India, followed by a series of others, each one a lavishly illustrated volume about a different place full of strange sights and populated by mysterious beasts.

  To Maria and Jemima's delight, he presented each new volume to them, rather than her, along with a dainty nosegay for each. He would then sit them beside him to discuss the newest addition to their library, making them laugh as he drolly pointed out the more unusual aspects of the country the book explored.

  How her sisters loved their moments with Gideon! How they adored him. She rather adored him as well during those times, her heart kindled by the pleasure he brought into her siblings' drab lives. But those were not the only instances during which she had found herself feeling somewhat more warmly toward him than she knew she should. Oh, no. To her consternation, she had begun to view almost all of his actions with favor.

  Not for the first time since that day in Grosvenor Square Park, Julia wondered at her feelings for Gideon Harwood. She should despise him, of course. After the way he had cheated her mother, threatened her family, and blackmailed her and her father, she should view him as the most reprehensible villain in the world. Shouldn't she?

  And yet, how could she? How could she hate a man who had shown her such gallantry? A man who was kind not only to her and her siblings, but to everyone around him, be they pauper or lord? Above all, how could she detest Gideon, knowing, as she now did, that the heart of his crime was simply loving his siblings too much? That that was indeed the case was something she had discerned when he had informed her that his unscrupulous actions had been performed for their benefit and theirs alone, though beyond stating that fact he had been oddly taciturn on the subject of his sisters and brother, offering little insight into their lives when he did mention them and surrendering even less when she asked. To be sure, all she really knew about them was that his sisters lived on his estate in Lancashire and that his brother had somehow disappeared.

  For what must have been the two-hundredth time since coming to her conclusion, Julia wondered at his odd reluctance to speak of the family he so obviously adored.

  And as always happened when she did so, she realized how little she knew about the man she was to wed.

  She was marrying a stranger in the morning.

  Desperate to avoid the sickening sense of panic that always assailed her when she allowed herself to dwell on that disconcerting truth, Julia turned her mind back to his love for his siblings. That thought, at least, was somewhat comforting. It also served to lift her spirits with hope for her own siblings' futures. After all, a man who cared so deeply for his own family was certain to understand her love fo
r hers. Which meant that perhaps-just perhaps-if she played her cards right, she might be able to persuade him to allow Maria, Jemima, and little Bertie to pay an extended visit to their home once they were wed. Yes. And if she were especially clever, she might even contrive to have them take up residence with her.

  The mere thought of having her sisters and brother near, where she could see that all of their needs were met, both in body and spirit, surrounded her heart in a warm glow. Exactly how she was going to persuade Gideon to allow such a thing, much less convince her parents to release them into her care, she did not know. Nonetheless, she had hope, which allowed her to dream of future happiness. What did it matter that her husband did not love her, if her siblings were safe and happy?

  "Julia?"

  Julia blinked several times, frowning as the sound of Caroline's voice penetrated her thoughts.

  "Are you quite well, Julia?" intruded Mina's inquiry.

  Julia smiled apologetically, dragged back to time and place by their voices. "Pray do forgive me. I fear that I was woolgathering," she replied, surprised to hear that her voice sounded as far away as her thoughts had been only seconds earlier.

  Amy giggled. "I daresay that I would be woolgathering as well if I knew that I was to pass tomorrow night in Gideon Harwood's bed."

  "Amy!" Caroline and Helene exclaimed in a scandalized duet, while Mina looked baffled by their censure.

  Amy rolled her eyes. "Oh, pish! We all know that the sly boots was hinting at the wedding night when she asked Julia that last question. Do own up, Helene." She slanted Helene a suggestive look, her eyebrows raised in barbed query.

  By the answering frown marring the famed one's celebrated brow, it was clear that she was about to spar a spat. In no mood to suffer one of Amy and Helene's petty squabbles, Julia laughed and said, "Since the inquiry was addressed to me, I shall be the judge of its nature." She smiled and nodded at Helene. "What was your question, dear?"

  If looks could kill, or otherwise maim their recipient, Amy would have been in a very bad state indeed for the one Helene shot her. Nonetheless, Helene managed to return Julia's smile and reply in a polite voice, "I simply asked if you were going to miss your bedchamber. You know how I have always admired it, the bed in particular." She indicated the green-lacquered satinwood bed with its gilded neoclassical garlands, oval crown, and artfully puffed swags and drapery.

  "I am quite certain that a man like Mr. Harwood has a very fine bed of his own," Amy saucily interjected, not about to be deterred from her naughtiness. "So fine, in fact, that it will quite make Julia forget this one altogether."

  "Amy!" Caroline again chided, while Mina frowned and Helene ignored the remark altogether.

  Amy sniffed. "Spare me your missish sensibilities, Caro. If you were the least bit inclined toward honesty, you would admit that you are every bit as fascinated by the bridal bed as I am."

  There was a pause during which Mina's frown deepened and Helene sniffed. Then Caroline carefully conceded, "I will admit that I am curious, yes. Nonetheless, curiosity is neither an excuse nor a license to engage in unseemly discussion."

  "Indeed?" Amy countered. "Well then. If one cannot discuss those matters about which they are curious, then how, pray tell, are they to ever learn what they wish to know?"

  "In this instance I daresay that you will learn quickly enough once you are wed, though I, for one, am perfectly content to remain ignorant about such matters for as long as possible," Helene deigned to respond. "From what I have heard, the lessons to be learned between the sheets are far from pleasant."

  Poor, innocent Mina could not have looked more confused. "Lessons between the sheets?" She shook her head, her forehead now a maze of creases in her puzzlement. "I cannot even begin to imagine what you mean, Helene."

  "She is speaking of the marriage act, dear. What men and women do between the sheets once they are wed," Amy informed her.

  Caroline nodded. "Yes. She is referring to the act that makes babies."

  "But babies are made by angels, who plant them in their mother's womb in answer to a woman's prayers," Mina said in a bewildered tone. "Are you saying that men and women pray for babies together while between the sheets?"

  "Er-not exactly," Caroline replied, casting a desperate look first at Amy, then at Julia.

  Julia, who had thus far taken pains to avoid thinking about the marriage bed, shook her head, not wishing to do so now. As Helene had pointed out, she would learn quickly enough once she was between the sheets with Gideon. So why add to her worries by fretting over the inevitable?

  Amy, however, had no such reservations. "Surely you have heard of coupling, Mina?" she inquired, gazing at Mina expectantly. When her query was met by a stupefied stare, she tried, "Mating?"

  "I always thought that mating was a word for marriage," Mina said, looking beyond troubled by her misconception.

  Amy sighed and shook her head. "I see that you truly are an innocent. Perhaps ..." Her voice trailed off as she seemed to consider what to do next. Nodding at whatever decision she had reached, she quizzed, "Tell me, dear. Do you know the differences between men and women? The bodily ones?"

  Mina's face instantly brightened. "Of course I do. Men are tall and strong, and women are small and soft."

  Helene, who had four brothers and was thus aware of the differences to which Amy referred, snorted. "Silly goose! She is referring to men's and women's private parts."

  "Oh?" Mina's face again crumbled into a frown as she absorbed that tidbit of information. In the next instant her eyes flew open wide and she flushed a dull red. "Oh."

  "I assume you understand now?" Helene asked with a superior air.

  "Umm-y-yes," Mina mumbled, her color deepening. "I-I-uh-once saw a n-naked boy infant, so I know that men have a queer little-umm-thimble down there and a pair of wrinkly"-she balled her hands to indicate the shape- "things instead of-of-well, you know."

  Amy giggled, a sharp, agitated twitter that warned that they were about to be treated to one of her more outrageous remarks. "That thimble grows to be quite large, as do the-" She imitated Mina's descriptive hand gesture. "I know, because I stumbled upon Lord Epsley relieving himself in a corner of Lady Fleming's garden during her picnic last spring. He was so deep in his cups that he did not think to cover himself, so I was able to catch more than a glimpse of his manly parts."

  "And they were large?" Julia blurted out before she could think to stop herself. She had naturally assumed that those parts remained as relatively small on an adult male as they were on an infant.

  Amy nodded, her eyes growing round as saucers, as they always did when on a subject that fascinated her. "His thimble was this big." She indicated a length between her palms that was very large indeed. "Of course, I suspect that Mr. Harwood will be larger, seeing as that he is much taller and far more masculine than Lord Epsley."

  "Do you really think so?" Julia asked, trying hard to keep the fear from her voice.

  "Of course he will be larger. Everyone knows that commoners are far larger down there than noblemen, and that they are much more brutal in their mating," Helene said. She shook her head, her expression pitying. "Poor, poor Julia. I daresay that it will hurt terribly when he enters you."

  "He will enter her?" Mina squeaked. "With his-" She imitated Amy's gesture by indicating an enormous length between her hands.

  Amy nodded. "He will thrust it in the place between her legs."

  "Over and over again until she is quite sore and bleeding," Helene supplied with a shudder. "I hear tell that it is a most dreadful experience and that a woman must do everything in her power to avoid having to submit to it."

  Mina could not have looked more horrified, an expression that painted a perfect portrait of Julia's own feelings at that moment. Though Julia knew that a man's male part had something to do with making babies, she had not realized that he would thrust it up into that tender place between her legs. She shuddered, the mere thought of Gideon doing such a thing to her sending a r
ush of panic spurting through her veins. Her throat suddenly bone dry, she somehow managed to croak, "However did you learn of such things?"

  "From my mother, of course," Helene replied, as if such discussions between mother and daughter were the most natural thing in the world. "She told me in order to save me from a bird-witted crush I once had on a merchant's son. She caught me kissing him, you see. I was only thirteen at the time-" She broke off, shaking her head, as if she still could not believe her own youthful folly. "At any rate, once she told me about the marriage act and how it would be especially torturous with a commoner, I have naturally since confined my interest in men to the grander titles in the ton. As Mama always says: The better bred the man, the gentler he will be in the bridal bed."

  "Well, I found several books on the subject hidden in Papa's desk. And according to both the pictures and the text, the act is supposed to be pleasurable," Amy challenged.

  "For the man, yes," retorted Helene with a sniff, "which is why men want to do it all the time. My advice to you, Julia, and it is the same advice my mother gave me, is that you encourage your husband to take a mistress posthaste, if he does not already have one. That way he shan't bother you beyond the purpose of begetting an heir or two."

  "Oh, my!" Mina whimpered, now looking on the verge of tears. "This marriage business sounds frightful to the extreme. I am glad that I do not have a serious suitor."

  "There, there, now, dear. I am certain that it is not nearly as bad as Helene paints it to be," Caroline said soothingly, reaching over to give Mina's arm a comforting pat. "To be sure, my mother seems quite content in marriage, as does Julia's mother, and most of the other women in the ton. If they were being subjected to such torture between the sheets, I doubt they would look so very satisfied with their lot."