Captive Of The Horde King

by Zoey Draven

  Their riders must be inside, I thought.

  Arokan just probably wanted to inform me that we would be leaving soon, to prepare me for what was to come.

  So, with a deep breath, I ducked into the tent.

  As my eyes adjusted to the darkened space, I gave a small smile when I saw Arokan, warmth infusing my chest, as it always did. He was regarding me with a careful expression, studying me, in Vorakkar mode, as I liked to refer to it as.

  Five warriors were also in the tent, looking tired from their journey, though they inclined their heads in respect when I entered.

  “What is it?” I asked Arokan. “Have you found—”

  Shock made me freeze when Arokan stepped aside, revealing someone behind him, someone I had not seen when I first entered.

  A hundred different emotions raced through my body when I saw someone I’d never thought to see again.

  “Kivan,” I breathed.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Kivan was there, standing next to Arokan.

  My brother.

  “H-how?” I breathed, feeling my legs tremble with the overwhelming emotions of relief and love and happiness.

  Kivan gave me a tired, hesitant smile. He was dirty, his clothes worn. He looked as though he’d lost weight, his face gaunt.

  “Kivan,” I murmured, tears springing into my eyes before I rushed my brother and wrapped my arms around him. Though he was five years younger than I was, he still dwarfed me.

  “Hi, Luna,” he whispered in my ear, bending low so that his cold cheek was pressed against mine. “Are you alright?”

  “Yes,” I said, still stunned, hardly daring to believe that this moment was real. “Yes. Are you?”

  I pulled back to study him more and my chest tightened as I did. The weeks and weeks I’d been gone had not been good to him. He’d suffered. Not just physically. I saw the strain in his eyes.

  My eyes went to Arokan, who was standing a respectful distance away. In a low voice, I heard him dismiss the horde warriors who, I realized, had brought my brother here. That was why they hadn’t come from the south.

  Arokan had tasked them with this, despite the risk it posed.

  With that knowledge, I felt perhaps the last part of my heart binding itself to him. Affection and respect and love filled my breast.

  He’d done this for me.

  His yellow-rimmed eyes came to me once the warriors departed, until it was just the three of us in the tent.

  “I have offered your brother a place in this horde,” Arokan told me.

  My lips parted, my eyes widening.

  “He knows my terms,” my husband said, his expression still careful. “He has not yet told me he will accept my offer, but perhaps after speaking with you, rei Morakkari, he will. I will leave you to speak.”

  I caught my husband’s arm before he ducked out of the tent. I squeezed his forearm, holding his gaze, as I whispered, “Thank you.”

  He inclined his head. I knew there would be much to discuss with him later, but right now, I needed to make sure my brother was alright.

  “There will be guards posted outside,” Arokan told me, though it was perhaps more for my brother’s ears than mine. My horde king didn’t trust my brother. Not yet.

  Hopefully in time, he would.

  I nodded and then he left, leaving me alone with Kivan.

  I immediately embraced my brother again before cupping his face in my hands, inspecting him.

  “I can’t believe you’re here,” I whispered, tears tracking down my cheeks.

  He frowned, reaching out to trace them. “I’ve never seen you cry before, Luna.”

  I laughed, though it sounded slightly hysterical. “I’m happy. So happy that you’re here. I’ve thought about you so much. You’re always on my mind.”

  “You’re always on mine,” Kivan said, though his shoulders dropped. He closed his eyes for a long moment and then said, his tone grave, “Luna, I’m so sorry. You’re here because of me. I can’t tell you how sorry—”

  “Shhh, Kivan,” I tried to soothe, frowning. “It’s okay. I’m fine.”

  “But that Dakkari—the horde king!” Kivan said, his voice hushed. “He—he—”

  “He is…” I trailed off with a small smile, not quite knowing how to explain Arokan of Rath Kitala.

  He was the strongest, most honorable male I’d ever met. He was everything a leader should be, needed to be, and more.

  Finally, I said, “He’s not what you think, Kivan. He’s good to me. More than good to me.”

  His expression told me he didn’t believe me. “Luna,” he urged quietly. “You’re confused. You don’t know these Dakkari. They—”

  I was surprised by how defensive I felt, how quick I was when I argued, “No, you don’t know them, Kivan. You have no idea who they are. But I’ve lived among them for over six weeks now. They have accepted me as their own.”

  Well, with the exception of one, I thought, thinking of Hukan.

  Kivan looked at me, seemingly surprised by my tone. “Luna…I—”

  “I’ve been treated well,” I continued. “I’ve been fed, I’ve been protected, I’ve been safe. I’ve lived here,” I whispered, “and not simply survived here. There’s a difference and I didn’t realize that until the Vorakkar brought me to his horde.”

  “You…you like being here?” Kivan asked, disbelief in his tone.

  “Yes,” I answered immediately. “So much so that whenever I’ve thought about the village, about you, I’ve felt guilty.”

  Kivan blinked.

  With a deep breath, I said, “The horde king…he means more to me than you realize, Kivan.”

  “What?” he asked, in disbelief. “You cannot mean that.”

  “I do,” I answered. “He’s my husband.”

  My brother’s eyes bulged almost comically and he seemed at a loss for words, his mouth gaping open, making his cheekbones seem even more hollowed.

  “When he took me from the village, he said he always knew I would be his queen,” I told him. “That was my purpose and what he wanted from me. And I’m not going to lie, I rebelled against it for a long time, struggled with it as I adjusted to my new life. But eventually, I realized that my feelings for him grew every day. He’s honorable and kind, but hard when he needs to be. He’s a better male than I could have ever thought. He’s protected me and strengthened me and cared for me. Now, I’m proud to be at his side. I’m proud to be queen of this horde.”

  Kivan processed my words with a grim expression. He swallowed. “This is hard for me to take in, Luna.”

  “It will take time,” I said. “Just like it did for me. What matters is that you’re here now. I asked my husband if I could see you again and here you are. You’re here because of him.”

  “When the horde riders came to our village yesterday,” Kivan said, “I wasn’t sure what to expect. They had brought food—meat, actual meat—with them last time, which had surprised us all. We weren’t sure if they had come to collect some form of payment. Instead, they’d asked for me. They told me I could see you if I went with them.”

  I smiled, pushing back a long strand of hair that covered his eyes. He needed a hair trim, which was something I’d always done for him.

  “The Vorakkar sent that food to the village,” I told him.

  “Why?” he asked, suspicious.

  “Because I had refused to eat when I first arrived,” I told him, a little embarrassed about that fact now. How far would I have really gotten, not eating? “I felt guilty about having food, when I knew you were hungry.”

  His expression softened. “Luna…”

  “So he made me a deal. If I ate, he would make sure the village ate too.”

  Kivan blinked and then looked down.

  “He said he offered you a place here,” I whispered, tilting his chin up so he could look at me. “Please tell me you’ll accept.”

  Kivan’s nostrils flared.

  “You’ll be safe. You’ll alw
ays have food in your belly. You won’t have to live in fear anymore.”

  “And what about the rest of the village?” Kivan asked.

  I sobered. But then I asked, “After I left, did they treat you well? Did Polin?”

  “That doesn’t matter,” he murmured. “It was my fault.”

  My lips pressed together. “You were an outcast, weren’t you?”

  He didn’t reply, but his shoulders sagged.

  “Kivan,” I whispered, biting my lip. He must have been scared. He’d lost me and then he’d lost the respect of the village, what remained of it at least. They’d turned their backs on him.

  “Would you go back with me?” he asked, his tone serious.

  My brow furrowed. “Why would you want to go back, after how they treated you?”

  His mouth opened and closed. Finally, he said, “Because it’s home. Once you are back, everything will be normal again. You’ll see. So, will you?”

  I looked at him, my chest tightening. Because Arokan had asked me this once. He’d asked if I would choose my brother and the village over the horde, over him. And I’d told him that he couldn’t ask me that, that it wasn’t fair.

  But right then, I had my answer.

  “No,” I whispered.

  He sucked in a breath.

  I looked at the notch in his throat, my heart heavy, before meeting the familiar color of his eyes. It was strange looking into them, after so long. I was so used to the dark eyes of the Dakkari that human eyes now seemed…alien.

  “My home is here now,” I said. “Kivan, I—before I came here, I never realized how much I struggled. For us…for you.”

  “Luna…” he said, shock making him freeze.

  “And it wasn’t your fault,” I said, rushing to get the words out. “It was my own guilt. When Mother died, I didn’t tell you everything.”

  “What didn’t you tell me?”

  I took in a deep breath and said quietly, “After she was attacked, she was still alive. Her second to last request was that I protect you like she would’ve. And then her last request…it was to end her suffering.”

  Kivan’s face paled.

  “I did,” I whispered. “But because of it, I’ve held onto so much guilt and self-loathing over the years. I threw myself into doing what she asked of me, into taking care of you. And now, I can see that I may have stopped taking care of myself in the process.”

  It hurt to say these things out loud because I knew they hurt Kivan, I could see it in his face. But I wanted to be honest with him, for once.

  “Luna,” he breathed. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I never realized…that I, that you—”

  He broke off, words failing him.

  “I love you, Kivan,” I told him, reaching out to take his hand, squeezing. “But I’ve learned to love myself too. And I can’t go back. My place is here, with him. My home is here. I hope that you’ll consider making it yours too.”

  I found Arokan in our tent, a little while later.

  Though it had been a long, hard conversation, I had left Kivan in the tent with posted guards and ordered a bathing tub brought in and a hot meal. After he rested, I would visit him again. Despite what his answer was—whether he would return to the village or stay—I wanted to spend as much time with him as possible.

  But right then, I needed to see my husband. I wanted to.

  I went to him, pressing my face to his wide, warm chest, breathing him in. His arms came around me, pressing me to him. He didn’t speak, as if he knew I needed time to process what had happened.

  Finally, I pulled back to look up at him. Whispering, I said, “You’re good to me. I don’t tell you nearly as much as I should, but you are, Arokan. Thank you. Thank you.”

  His eyes softened. He brushed his fingers through my hair, careful of his claws. “My only wish is your happiness, kalles.”

  “I am happy,” I told him, giving him a soft smile. “Now, even more so.”

  “He has agreed then?” Arokan asked in a low tone. “To remain with the horde?”

  “He hasn’t given me his answer,” I said. “But we talked. I told him many things that I should have told him a long time ago…and I feel lighter for it. I think he will accept your offer, once his mind processes everything that’s happened.”

  Arokan nodded.

  “He asked me to go back with him,” I admitted.

  Arokan’s jaw ticked. “I figured he might.”

  “I thought about when you asked me if I would choose to leave or stay if I had the choice,” I said softly.

  “I remember.”

  “I told him no.”

  The yellow rim of his eyes contracted. “Lysi?” he said softly, his voice steady.

  “I just knew,” I said, giving him a smile as I reached up to touch his jaw. “While I love my brother, I also know that I cannot betray the horde. I wouldn’t leave them. More importantly, I wouldn’t leave you.”

  Arokan blew out a long exhale through his nostrils and he bent low so he could touch our foreheads together.

  “Lysi?” he rasped.

  I smiled. “Lysi.”

  We were quiet for a long while and then he murmured, “Knowing you, kalles, I worry that you feel guilt for this.”

  I shook my head because he knew me well.

  And while I did, I recognized that was due to the Old Luna.

  The New Luna, however, said, “I’m learning to give myself permission to be happy. Guilt was a large part of my life. It fueled a lot of my decisions. But I’ve paid my dues, I did what my mother asked of me. Now I just want to be free to make the choices I want to make without fear.”

  “You will,” he murmured, gripping my chin gently to meet my eyes. “I know you will, kalles.”

  I grinned and then pressed my lips to his in a soft, thorough kiss.

  When I pulled back, I accused, “You’ve been keeping this secret from me.”

  “I was not sure he would come,” Arokan confessed. “But he did. I offered him a place here for you, Luna. Only for you.”

  “I know,” I whispered, my heart drumming in my chest. If I’d ever doubted Arokan’s feelings for me, those doubts were gone now.

  “It was fortunate timing that he arrived today,” my horde king said next, his tone strange.

  “Why?” I asked.

  “Because while you were with your brother, the scouting parties returned. They found a viable camp with plenty of resources.”

  It was time, I realized. Time to leave.

  “Regardless of what your brother’s decision is, kalles,” Arokan said, “we will leave at first light in two days.”

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  The morning we were set to leave, the entire camp woke when it was still dark out to being dismantling the camp. The majority of the day before, I’d worked on packing up the various items I’d collected over the past six weeks—the various articles of clothing I’d made, little trinkets from the market that had been gifted to me by the vendors, my store of dried hji fruit that I obsessed over, the golden dagger that Arokan had crafted for me after our training session in the forest.

  Including my deviri, I had a total of five chests that I’d packed, not including the chests I packed with my Arokan’s belongings.

  Then the morning came, dark and cool. I watched as the domed voliki were dismantled with stunning efficiency and ease. I watched as the pyroki enclosures were taken apart, their metal bars and troughs packed onto one of the numerous carts that emerged. Since my help was denied with the tents, I assisted the mrikro, ensuring the pyroki were calm and tethered until our departure, while my brother watched me from the sidelines.

  That morning, I was stunned how quickly the camp changed, going from a lively, populated place, to a barren, empty patch of land.

  When the sun rose, we were ready to leave. The sky turned from an inky black to a blush pink. But apparently we weren’t to leave yet. The horde gathered, over a hundred members, warriors, females, children. I stood by Aro
kan’s side as he led a prayer of thanks to Kakkari, as an elderly Dakkari male dug handfuls of a golden granule substance from a sack and spread it over the earth where the camp had once been.

  It was a calming experience, a goodbye, a thanks to the land that had provided for us during our time there.

  Then, it was time to move on, to leave.

  My eyes met my brother’s from across the empty clearing. The night before we left, my brother had told me he would stay with me. He wouldn’t leave me. I had been relieved and gladdened by the news, but it didn’t stop me from warning him not to do anything foolish. My husband would only be so merciful and if my brother did anything to jeopardize the horde, his punishment would be swift.

  It would take time for my brother to adjust. I knew that. I was simply glad he would give the horde a chance. I was glad he would be safe, he would be fed, and he would be with me.

  Arokan turned to me, breaking my gaze. I looked up at him, aware that my brother still studied us.

  “We begin again, rei Morakkari,” he told me softly.

  “I’m ready,” I replied.

  “Are you well, Missiki?” Mirari asked, crouching over me, an alarmed look in her gaze.

  When she’d seen me pull my pyroki to a sudden halt and jump off its back to dart into the covering of the forest we passed, she’d cried out and immediately followed.

  “I’m fine,” I said, wiping my mouth once I was finished emptying my stomach of my morning meal.

  “Here,” she said, taking a cloth of her travel satchel, and I thanked her, taking it to clean up.

  I heard the quick vibrations of a pyroki approaching fast and I looked up to see Arokan. He’d been riding towards the front of the horde that morning and I’d fallen back a little to ride next to my brother and my piki. He must’ve heard Mirari’s alarmed cry and came racing towards us.

  “Kalles,” he rasped, swinging off Kailon with ease to come to me. “What is wrong?”

  Concern was etched into his features and I felt bad for alarming him so much. “Nothing,” I replied. “The dried meat this morning just didn’t agree with me. I feel much better now.”