All the king's men

by Роберт Пенн Уоррен

  Alex came in with a fellow with him, and I knew my little conversation was not promising. My mission was of some delicacy, not fit for the ear of a stranger. I figured that might be the reason Alex had his friend in tow. Maybe it was, foe Alex was cagey in an amateurish sort of way. In any case, he had the Boss with him.

  Only it was not the Boss. Not to the crude eye of the _homme sensuel__. Metaphysically it was the Boss, but how was I to know? Fate come walking through the door, and it is five feet eleven inches tall and heavyish in the chest and shortish in the leg and is wearing a seven-fifty seersucker suit which is too long in the pants so the cuffs crumple down over the high black shoes, which could do with a polishing, and a stiff high collar like a Sunday-school superintendent and a blue-stripe tie which you know his wife gave him last Christmas and which he has kept in tissue paper with the holly card ("Merry Xmas to my Darling Willie from your Loving Wife") until he got ready to go up the city, and a gray felt hat with the sweat stains showing through the band. It comes in just like that, and how are you to know? It comes in, trailing behind Alex Michel, who is, or was before the piano player got him, six-feet-two of beautifully articulated bone and gristle with a hard, bony, baked-looking face and two little quick brown eyes which don't belong above that classic torso and in that face and which keep fidgeting around like a brace of Mexican jumping beans. So Fate trails modestly along behind Alex Michel, who approaches the table with an air of command which would deceive no one.

  Alex shook my hand and said, "Hi, pal," and slapped me on the shoulder with a palm that was tough enough to crack a black walnut, and paid proper obeisance to Mr. Duffy, who extended a hand without rising; and then, as a sort of afterthought, Alex jerked a thumb toward his trailing companion and said, "This is Willie Stark, gents. From up home at Mason City. Me and Willie was in school together. Yeah, and Willie, and he was a bookworm, he was teacher's pet. Wuzn't you, Willie?" And Alex whickered like a stallion in full appreciation of his own delicious humor and nudged the teacher's pet in the ribs. Then, controlling himself, he added, "And he's still teacher's pet, ain't you, Willie, ain't you?"

  And he turned to Duffy and me, and explained, before mirth again took him and Slade's back room again resounded with the cheerful note of the breeding paddock, "Willie–Willie–he married a school-teacher!"

  That idea seemed monstrously funny to Alex. Meanwhile, Willie, unable to complete the amenities of the situation, bowed to the blast and stood there with the old gray felt hat in his hand, with the sweat showing around the band outside where it had soaked through. Willie's large face, above the stiff country collar, didn't show a thing.

  "Yeah–yeah–he married a school-teacher!" Alex reaffirmed with undiminished relish.

  "Well," said Mr. Duffy, whose experience and tact were equal to any situation, "they tells me school-teachers are made with it in the same place." Mr. Duffy lifted his lips to expose the gold, but made no sound, for, Mr. Duffy being a man of the world and serene in confidence, his style was to put forth his sally and let it make its way on its intrinsic worth and to leave the applause to the public.

  Alex provided the applause in good measure. I contributed only a grin which felt sickly on my face, and Willie was blank.

  "Gawd!" Alex managed, when breath had returned to him, "Gawd, Mr. Duffy, you are a card! You shore-Gawd are." And again he vigorously nudged the teacher's pet in the ribs to spur his laggard humor. When he got no result, he nudged again, and demanded flatly of his ward: "Now ain't Mr. Duffy a card?"

  "Yes, Willie replied, looking at Mr. Duffy innocently, judicially, dispassionately. "Yes," he said, "Mr. Duffy is a card." And as the admission was made, albeit belatedly and with some ambiguity of inflection, the slight cloud which had gathered upon Mr. Duffy's brow was dissipated with no trace of rancor left behind.

  Willie took advantage of the momentary lull to wind up the ritual of introduction which Alex's high spirits had interrupted. He transferred his old gray hat to his left hand and took the two steps necessary to bring him to the table, and gravely extended his hand to me. So much water has flowed beneath the bridges since Alex has jerked his thumb toward the stranger from the country and said. "This is Willie Stark," that I had almost forgotten I hadn't known Willie all my life. So I didn't catch on right away that he was out to shake hands. I must have looked at his outstretched hand inquiringly and then given him a blank look, and he just showed me his dead pan–it was just another pan, at first glance anyway–and kept on holding his hand out. Then I came to, and not to be undone in courtesy of the old school, I hitched my chair back from the table and almost stood all the way up, and groped for his hand. It was a pretty good-sized hand. When you first took it you figured it was on the soft side, and the palm a little too moist–which is something, however, you don't hold against a man in certain latitudes–then you discovered it has a solid substructure. It was like the hand of a farm boy who has not too recently given up the plow for a job in the crossroad store. Willie's hand gave mine three decorous pump-handle motions, and he said, "Glad to meetcha, Mr. Burden," like something he had memorized, and then, I could have sworn, he gave me a wink. Then looking into that dead pan, I wasn't sure. About twelve years later, at a time when the problem of Willie's personality more imperiously occupied my rare hours of speculation, I asked him, "Boss, do you remember the time we first got acquainted in the back room of Slade's joint?"

  He said he did, which wasn't remarkable, for he was like the circus elephant, he never forgot anything, the fellow who gave him the peanut or the fellow who put snuff in his trunk.

  "You remember when we shook hands?" I asked him.

  "Yeah," he said "Well, Boss," I demanded, "did you or didn't you wink at me?"

  "Boy–" he said and toyed with his glass of scotch and soda and dug the heel of one of his unpolished, thirty-dollar, chastely designed bench-made shoes into the best bed-spread the St. Regis Hotel could afford. "Boy," he said, and smiled at me paternally over his glass, "that is a mystery."

  "Don't you remember?" I said.

  "Sure," he said, "I remember."

  "Well," I demanded "Suppose I just had something in my eye?" he said.

  "Well, damn it, you just had something in your eye ten."

  "Suppose I didn't have anything in my eye?"

  "Then maybe you winked because you figured you and me had some views in common about the tone of the gathering."

  "Maybe," he said. "It ain't any secret that my old schoolmate Alex was a heel. And it ain't any secret that Tiny Duffy is as sebaceous a fat-ass as ever made the spring groan in a swivel chair."

  "He is an s. o. b.," I affirmed.

  "He is," the Boss agreed cheerfully, "but he is a useful citizen. If you know what to do with him."

  "Yeah," I said, "and I suppose you think you know what to do with him. You made him Lieutenant Governor." (For that was in the Boss's last term when Tiny was his understudy.)

  "Sure," the Boss nodded, "somebody's got to be Lieutenant Governor."

  "Yeah," I said, "Tiny Duffy."

  "Sure," he said, "Tiny Duffy. The beauty about Tiny is that nobody can trust him and you know it. You get somebody somebody can trust maybe, and you got to sit up nights worrying whether you are the somebody. You get Tiny, and you can get a night's sleep. All you got to do is keep the albumen scared out of his urine."

  "Boss, did you wink at me that time back at Slade's?"

  "Boy," he said, "if I was to tell you, then you wouldn't have anything to think about."

  So I never did know.

  But I did see Willie shake hands that morning with Tiny Duffy and fail to wink at him. He just stood there in front of Mr. Duffy, and when the great man, not rising, finally extended his hand with the reserved air of the Pope offering his toe to the kiss of a Campbellite, Willie took it and gave it the three pumps which seemed to be regulation up in Mason City.

  Alex sat down at the table, and Willie just stood there, as though waiting to be invited, till Alex kicked th
e fourth chair over a few inches with his foot and said, "Git off yore dogs, Willie."

  Willie sat down and laid his gray felt hat on the marble top in front of him. The edges of the brim crinkled and waved up all around off the marble like a piecrust before grandma trims it. Willie just sat there behind his hat and his blue-striped Christmas tie and waited, with his hands laid in his lap.

  Slade came in from the front, and said, "Beer?"

  "All round," Mr. Duffy ordered.

  "Not for me, thank you kindly," Willie said.

  M Duffy, with some surprise and no trace of pleasure, turned his gaze upon Willie, who seemed unaware of the significance of the event, sitting upright in his little chair behind the hat and the tie. Then Mr. Duffy looked up at Slade, and jerking his head toward Willie, said, "Aw, give him some beer."

  "No, thanks," Willie said, with no more emotion that you would put into the multiplication table.

  "Too strong for you?" Mr. Duffy demanded.

  "No," Willie replied, "but no thank you."

  "Maybe the school-teacher don't let him drink nuthen," Alex offered.

  "Lucy don't favor drinking," Willie said quietly. "For a fact."

  "What she don't know don't hurt her," Mr. Duffy said.

  "Git him some beer," Alex said to Slade.

  "All round," Mr. Duffy repeated, with the air of closing an issue.

  Slade looked at Alex and he looked at Mr. Duffy and he looked at Willie. He flicked his towel halfheartedly in the direction of a cruising fly, and said: "I sells beer to them as wants it. I ain't making nobody drink it."

  Perhaps that was the moment when Slade made his fortune. How life is strange and changeful, and the crystal is in the steel at the point of fracture, and the toad bears a jewel in its forehead, and the meanings of moments passes like the breeze that scarcely ruffles the leaf of the willow.

  Well, anyway, when Repeal came and mailmen had to use Mack trucks to haul the application for licenses over to the City Hall, Slade got a license. He got a license immediately, and he got a swell location, and he got the jack to put in leather chairs kind to the femurs, and a circular bar; and Slade, who never had a dime in his life after he paid rent and protection, now stands in the shadows under the murals of undressed dames in the midst of the glitter of chromium and tinted mirrors, wearing a double-breasted blue suit, with what's left of his hair plastered over his skull, and keeps one eye on the black boys in white jackets who tote the poison and the other on the blonde at the cash register who knows that her duties are not concluded when the lights are turned off at 2:00 A.M., and the strains of a three-piece string ensemble soothe the nerves of the customers.

  How did Slade get the license so quickly? How did he get the lease when half the big boys in the business were after that corner? How did he get the jack for the leather chairs and the string ensemble? Slade never confided in me, but I figure Slade got his reward for being an honest man.

  Anyway, Slade's statement of principle about the beer question closed the subject that morning. Tiny Duffy lifted a face to Slade with the expression worn by the steer when you give it the hammer; then, as sensation returned, he took refuge in his dignity. Alex permitted himself the last luxury of irony. Says Alex: "Well, maybe you got some orange pop for him." And when the whicker of his mirth had died away, Slade said: "I reckin I have. If he wants it"

  "Yes," Willie said, "I think I'll take some orange pop."

  The beer came, and the bottle of pop. The bottle of pop had two straws in it. Willie lifted his two hands out of his lap where they had decorously lain during the previous conversation, and took the bottle between them, and affixed his lips to the straws. His lips were a little bit meaty, but they weren't loose. Not exactly. Maybe at first glance you might think so. You might think he had a mouth like a boy, not quite shaped up, and that was the way he looked that minute, all right, leaning over the bottle and the straws stuck in his lips, which were just puckered up. But if you stuck around long enough, you'd see something a little different. You would see that they were hung together, all right, even if they were meaty. His face was a little bit meaty, too, but thin-skinned, and had freckles. Hs eyes were big, big and brown, and he'd look right at you, out of the middle of that thin-skinned and freckled and almost pudgy face (at first you would think it was pudgy, then you would change your mind), and the dark brown, thick hair was tousled and crinkled down over his forehead, which wasn't very high in the first place, and the hair was a little moist. There was little Willie. There was Cousin Willie from the country, from up at Mason City, with his Christmas tie, and maybe you would take him out to the park and show him the swans.

  Alex leaned toward Duffy, and said confidingly, "Willie–he's in poly-tics."

  Duffy's features exhibited the slightest twitch of interest, but the twitch was dissipated into the vast oleaginous blankness which was the face of Duffy in response. He did not even look at Willie.

  "Yeah," Alex continued, leaning closer and nodding sideways at Willie, "yeah, in poly-ticks. Up in Mason City."

  Mr. Duffy's head did a massive quarter-revolution in the direction of Willie and the pale-blue eyes focused upon him from the great distance. Not that the mention of Mason City was calculated to impress Mr. Duffy, but the fact that Willie could be in politics anywhere, even in Mason City, where, no doubt, the hogs scratched themselves against the underpinnings of the post office, raised certain problems which merit passing attention. So Mr. Duffy gave his attention to Willie, and solved the problem. He solved by deciding that there wasn't any problem. Willie was not in politics. Not in Mason City or anywhere else. Alex Michel was a liar and the truth was not in him. You could look at Willie and see that he never had been and never would be in politics. Willie could look at Willie and deduce the fact that Willie was not in politics. So he said, "Yeah," with heavy irony, and incredulity was obvious upon his face.

  Not that I much blame Duffy. Duffy was face to face with the margin of mystery where all our calculations collapse, where the stream of time dwindles into the sands of eternity, where the formula fails in the test tube, where chaos and old night hold sway and we hear the laughter in the ether dream. But he didn't know he was, and so he said, "Yeah."

  "Yeah," Alex echoed, without irony, and added, "Up in Mason City. Willie is County Treasurer. Ain't you, Willie?"

  "Yes," Willie said, "County Treasurer."

  "My God," Duffy breather, with the air of a man who discovers that he has built upon sands and dwelt among mock shows.

  "Yeah," Alex iterated, "and Willie id down here on business for Mason Country, ain't you, Willie?"

  Willie nodded.

  "About a bond issue they got up there," Alex continued. "They gonna build a schoolhouse and it's a bond issue."

  Duffy's lips worked, and you could catch the discreet glimmer of the gold in the bridgework, but no words came forth. The moment was too full for sound of foam.

  But it was true. Willie was the County Treasurer and he was, that day long ago, in the city on business about the bond issue for the schoolhouse. And the bond were issued and the schoolhouse built, and more than a dozen years later the big black Cadillac with the Boss whipped past the schoolhouse, and then Sugar-Boy really put his foot down on the gas and we headed out, still on the almost new slab of Number 58.

  We had done about a mile, and not a word spoken, when the Boss turned around from the front sea and looked at me and said, "Jack, make a note to find out something about Malaciah's boy and the killing."

  "What's his name?" I asked.

  "Hell, I don't know, but he's a good boy."

  "Malaciah's name, I mean," I said.

  "Malaciah Wynn," the Boss said.

  I had my notebook out now and wrote it down, and wrote down, _stabbing__.

  "Find out when the trial is set and get a lawyer down. A good one, and I mean a good one that'll know how to handle it and let him know he God-damn well better handle it, but don't get a guy that wants his name in lights."


  "Albert Evans," I said, "he ought to do."

  "Uses hair oil," the Boss said. "Uses hair oil and slicks it back till the top of his head looks like the black ball on a pool table. Get somebody looks like he didn't sing with a dance band. You losing your mind?"

  "All right," I said, and wrote in my notebook, _Abe Lincoln type__. I didn't have to remind myself about that. I just wrote because I had got in the habit. You can build up an awful lot of habits in six years, and you can fill an awful lot of little black books in that time and put them in a safety-deposit box when they get full because they aren't something to leave around and because they would be worth their weight in gold to some parties to get their hands on. Not that they ever got their hands on them. A man's got to carry something besides a corroded liver with him out of that dark backward and abysm of time, and it might as well be the little black books. The little black books lie up there in the safety-deposit box, and there are your works of days and hands all cozy in the dark in the little box and the world's great axis grinds.

  "You pick him," the Boss said, "but keep out of sight. Put one of your pals on him, and pick your pal."

  "I got you," I replied, for I got him.

  The Boss was just about to turn around and divide his attention between the highway and Sugar-Boy's speedometer, when Duffy cleared this throat and said, "Boss."

  "Yeah?" the Boss said.

  "You know who it was got cut?"

  "No," the Boss said, getting ready to turn around, "and I don't care if it was the sainted uncut maiden aunt of the Apostle Paul."