Life Regained (An Amish Friendship Series Book 1)

by Sarah Price

  Reaching up, Carl rubbed the back of his neck, his eyes traveling to the front door of Mary’s house as he answered.“I did.”He gestured with a simple nod of his head.“And I am.”

  She didn’t understand.“But…”She looked first at Carl and then back to Elijah.“I’m confused,”she finally stated.

  “Mary is my aunt,”Carl explained, a twinkle in his eye.

  Speechless, Elizabeth stared at him, her eyes wide as she tried to comprehend what he had just told her. What on earth was he talking about? How could Mary be his aunt? Mary was Amish and Carl was most certainly not.

  Elijah laughed, taking off his hat to wipe at his forehead with the back of his arm.“You didn’t know that?”He looked delighted with this piece of information.“And you’ve been here almost a month?”

  “I…I had no idea,”she managed to say.

  And then, it dawned on her. Mary had told her that two of her older brothers had not accepted their baptism into the Amish faith. Certainly one of them was Carl’s father. That also explained why Ethan worked at the lumber mill. Now it made sense why the Troyers would hire a non-Amish man to work there. Ethan was family, after all.

  “Come walk me to the house,”Carl said softly, placing his hand on Elizabeth’s arm. In stunned silence, she permitted him to guide her toward Mary’s. Still chuckling, Elijah returned to his chores, calling out that he’d meet up with Carl later.

  “I hadn’t realized you didn’t know,”Carl explained.“Not until the other night.”

  “Why would I make that connection?”she asked.“I mean, they’re Amish after all and you’re…”

  “Not Amish,”he finished her sentence.“My father never joined the church. He married, lived in Tennessee for a while, then returned to Ohio when his father died. I was older and stayed behind after he left. I wanted to help my grandmother with the farm.”

  “I wish you would have told me.”

  He raised an eyebrow.“Would it have made a difference?”

  Shrugging her shoulders, she shook her head. It wouldn’t have made a difference. Perhaps the opposite. However, she still felt as if she had been deceived, just a little.“I just feel as if I was kept out of a secret.”

  He laughed.“Yes, I’m a big dark family secret!”Walking up the steps to the porch, he didn’t stop to knock at the door. Instead, he opened it and gestured for Elizabeth to enter before him.

  She hesitated.“I can’t go in,”she said, lowering her voice.“I wasn’t invited.”She would never presume an invitation to anyone’s house, especially someone like Mary.

  Carl rolled his eyes in mock exasperation.“As if you wouldn’t be invited,”he sighed playfully. Then, meeting her eyes, he motioned with his head.“Go on, now. In you go.”

  At his insistence, she walked into the house and headed to the kitchen, feeling Carl’s presence directly behind her.

  Mary looked up and smiled at the two of them.“How nice! I’m glad Carl invited you. He said that he would.”

  Still trying to recover from the surprise of Carl’s admission, Elizabeth leveled her gaze at the older Amish woman.“Mary,”she started.“Why didn’t you tell me that Carl is your nephew?”

  Placing her hand on her hip, Mary pursed her lips and gave him what Elizabeth recognized as a look, the same‘look’that she had given Carl the other week at the shopping plaza. What Elizabeth had originally thought was a look of vexation she now recognized as the secret delight of an adoring aunt toward her nephew.

  “Now, why would I want to go and admit that?”she said teasingly. She looked from Carl to Elizabeth.“Admit that we have an Englischer in the family?”

  Carl laughed and reached over to embrace Mary, the first time that Elizabeth had witnessed any physical affection among the Amish. The ease with which Carl talked with Mary and made himself at home in her kitchen amazed her. How had she possibly missed this side of Carl? Of Mary?

  For the next two hours, Elizabeth observed the interaction between the Troyer family and Carl. To complete her surprise, she learned that Carl lived just down the road on a property adjacent to the Troyers. It had been the Carlston family’s property, where Mary had grown up with her father, siblings, and step-mother.

  The other day, Mary had told Elizabeth about how John’s mother was so critical of her upbringing. With the Carlston family living just over the hill and in the same g’may, the Troyer farm was in close enough proximity to observe their neighbors.

  And, at that moment, she saw Carl in a new light.

  He was an Englische living among the Amish. He navigated the simple tradition of his ancestors, balancing it with the materialistic culture of the non-Amish world. As a child, he had played with his Amish cousins while attending an Englische school. As an adult, he had married a local girl and lived in a small development. When he became a widower, he returned to his family’s farm, accepting the help of his Amish relatives in raising his children.

  “More pie?”

  Elizabeth lifted her hand and shook her head.“Heavens no! I’m stuffed.”

  Carl reached for the plate.“Don’t mind if I do,”he said as he took it from Mary. He looked over at Sue Ann, Katie’s oldest daughter approvingly.“This is a great ground cherry pie, Sue Ann.”

  “I have to confess,”Elizabeth said.“I’ve never heard of ground cherries.”

  Carl leaned over and nudged her.“They grow on the ground,”he whispered, eliciting laughter from the younger children at the table.

  “I never would have known,”she quipped back. He responded with a playful wink.

  Mary proceeded to tell her about ground cherries, a small tomato-like fruit that grew on a vine. The fruit grew in a papery husk and varied in taste from tart to sweet. It was a favorite among the Troyer family, a fact proven by the now empty pie pan that remained on the table.

  It was almost seven-thirty by the time that Elizabeth noticed John Troyer beginning to wither in his chair. His eyes drooped and Elizabeth glanced at Carl. She could tell it was time to leave but she didn’t want to appear rude in being the first to do so.

  Carl seemed to read her mind.

  “Tell you what,”he said as he pushed his chair back from the table.“I can walk you up to the cottage with a flashlight so that these fine folk can get cleaned up and to bed.”He reached out and tweaked Dee’s nose.“And I bet I know a few little ones who need to get ready for bed so they can help with chores before school tomorrow.”

  After saying goodnight, Carl helped Elizabeth with her coat. She ignored the look on Mary’s face from the kitchen as she watched the kind gesture from her nephew to the Englische woman. Embarrassed, Elizabeth looked away, her heart pounding. Carl didn’t seem to notice her discomfort as he opened the door and waited for her to step through it first.

  He placed his hand on the small of her back as they walked. It was a comforting gesture, yet one that caught her off guard. For a fleeting moment, she tried to remember if William had ever been so chivalrous. When they had dated, they had been teenagers. When they married, they were barely out of high-school. Over the years, while he always treated her with kindness and tenderness, the attentive nature had disappeared. Or perhaps it had never developed. She found that she couldn’t remember.

  “I’m leaving on Monday,”she heard herself say as they approached the cottage.

  The words popped out of her mouth and she was momentarily as surprised as he was. She had been thinking about it for a few days. But she hadn’t made a final decision. At least, she hadn’t thought that she did. However, she suspected that the moment that she had tried to picture William’s face, and realized that the memory had become faded and fuzzy, she had known it was time to go home.

  He remained silent for a moment as if mulling over her words. She knew better than to look at him for fear of losing her nerve.

  He cleared his throat.“I see.”They walked a few more steps before he added,“I thought you were staying until the holidays?”

  “Thanksgiving is only a few
weeks away so I was thinking that I need to head back.”They reached the cottage so she stopped walking and, taking a deep breath, turned to look at him.“It’s time, Carl. As much as I like it here, I do have responsibilities back in Nottingham.”

  “Responsibilities.”He repeated the word in a strange voice, a voice that lacked his typical teasing and warmth. Instead, it was flat and emotionless.

  “I have a house,”she continued.“I have to get it ready for winter. I’ve never done that before.”

  Solemnly, he nodded his head.

  “And then my children…”She paused as if that explained everything. When he didn’t say anything, she felt compelled to continue.“Plus the two boys…Ryan’s boys. I miss them, too.”She sighed.“Seeing Katie’s little ones the other day really made me miss them.”

  He kept his hands behind his back and rocked slightly on his heels.“Well,”he finally said, breaking his silence.“I understand.”Despite his words, his tone stated otherwise. The way that he avoided her eyes expressed his disappointment in her decision.

  “I’m sure I’ll come back to visit,”she added quickly.“I do enjoy Mount Hope. This has been a peaceful few weeks.”Her voice trailed off. Peaceful was an understatement. Her time at the Troyers’farm had proven to be therapeutic in ways that she couldn’t have imagined.

  “Well then,”Carl said, taking a step backwards.“I’ll bid you good-night, Just Elizabeth, and wish you well for the future.”

  For a moment, she almost spoke up. She wanted to tell him that this wasn’t good-bye. She wanted to offer some chance of hope. But she knew that she couldn’t…or rather that she shouldn’t. A chance of hope for what? She barely knew this man. While he was kind and charming with a lovely family, she was, after all, fifty-four years old with her own life back in West Virginia.

  As she watched Carl walk back through he shadows of the evening toward his truck, she sighed. With his shoulders hunched over, she sensed his disappointment. In a way, she felt it, too. But what did he expect? That she would pick up and move her entire life based on a brand new friendship and one dinner date? That she would live for the rest of her life in a small cottage on the Troyers’farm? She was a grown woman who needed to return to her life.

  My life, she thought to herself as she listened to the engine of Carl’s truck fade away as he drove down the driveway. Taking a deep breath, she opened the door to the cottage and slipped inside. A life without William. A life without her children. A life without meaning in a house that held memories that had died along with her husband. A life that she realized she needed to rebuild in order to make it something worthwhile and meaningful.

  With a deep breath, she locked the door behind herself and walked toward the bedroom. The challenge that faced her was almost as daunting as the one that she had just endured. But, with the help of friends, family and God, she knew that she would survive.

  There simply was no alternative.

  CHAPTER 14

  When she woke up, Elizabeth felt recharged. Her decision to leave was the right one, she told herself. It was time. Time to get everything in order. Time to take charge and make changes. She wasn’t certain where to begin, but she knew that change was in order.

  Immediately after her morning coffee, she slipped on her coat before heading down the path toward the Troyers’house. She knew that she needed to inform Mary that she was leaving. For some reason, she dreaded doing it. Unlike Carl, Mary was different. Over the past four weeks, they had spent a lot of time together. Saying good-bye made Elizabeth feel nervous.

  As she approached the house, Elizabeth reprimanded herself. She had no reason to feel apprehensive, she told herself. Mary would understand. After all, she knew that Elizabeth had obligations and responsibilities back in West Virginia. Her family lived there and, after all, the Amish knew how important family was!

  To her surprise, Mary’s reaction mirrored Carl’s. The Amish woman appeared to withdraw immediately as if taken aback by Elizabeth’s announcement. But she, too, did not ask too many questions. She merely nodded her head.

  “I see.”

  Deja vu. Hadn’t Carl reacted in the same manner?“It’s not that I don’t like it here,”she stammered.“I do, believe me.”

  Mary continued kneading the dough on her counter.

  “I…I…”She paused, wondering what to say next. She hadn’t expected Mary to respond with silence.“And I appreciate everything you have done for me, Mary.”Stepping forward, Elizabeth reached out her hand and laid it on Mary’s arm.“Please understand. You’ve taught me so much and I’m feeling so much stronger than when I arrived. But it’s time to go back to my family.”

  Reluctantly, Mary stopped working the dough and sighed. She took a moment to compose herself before she looked up at Elizabeth, an odd expression on her face.“You are welcome back here anytime,”she said.“And I don’t invite many guests back, Elizabeth.”

  It was the first time Mary had called her by her name.

  “You’ve taught me a lot, too,”Mary continued.“I consider you more than a friend. I consider you part of our family as well.”

  Elizabeth felt a lump forming in her throat. She nodded her head but didn’t trust herself to speak. How could she respond to such a kind remark.

  “Even if you are Englische,”Mary added, returning her attention to the dough.

  Back at the cottage, Elizabeth stood in the center of the main room and looked around. The simple decor, so quaint and country, made her feel at home. There were no photos to remember the past, no figurines to gather dust, no closets that needed to be cleaned out. Everything was kept to the bare minimum and Elizabeth found that she was going to miss it.

  She made herself a vow that, when she returned to Nottingham, she would clean out the rooms and redecorate. She would throw out all of those knick knacks that she had accumulated over the years, gifts from the children for birthdays and Mother’s Day. It wasn’t that she hadn’t appreciated them. She had. But it was time to cleanse her life of clutter. She wanted her home to be like the cottage: pristine and neat, orderly and efficient. Like the Amish.

  For the rest of the day, she worked on cleaning the cottage. She wanted to leave it in the same shape that she had received it. Moving furniture, she swept away dust bunnies and wiped down the floorboards. She used the same methods to clean that Mary had taught her when she had helped clean Katie’s house for Sunday worship the previous week. She even washed the windows, using the vinegar formula and crinkled newspapers on the glass so that no streaks remained behind.

  By the time that the sun began to set, she took a step back and admired her work. Without a doubt, there was not one section of the small cottage that she hadn’t wiped down, swept, or polished. She was pleased with her labor for the day, realizing that it had been therapeutic to lose herself in the mundane tasks of cleaning. She felt as if each piece of dirt that she swept up or washed away diminished the pain she had felt over the past eight months. By the time she finished, she felt as cleansed and renewed as the house looked.

  Rather than dirty the kitchen, she decided against cooking. She knew that the Troyers were planning to visit one of John’s sisters the following day so, she’d have a long, peaceful last day at the cottage. She planned to attend a local church service in the morning before returning to the cottage for her last day, finishing the book she had purchased at Kelly’s bookstore before she retired for an early morning departure. As for tonight, if she stopped at a restaurant, she could pick up some take-out for lunch the following day.

  She wasn’t certain why but she avoided the diner. She had said her good-bye to Carl and didn’t want to have to face him again. Instead, she stopped at a small Italian restaurant that was on the outskirts of town.

  To her surprise, she had to wait for a table. Not long, but long enough to pique her curiosity. Peering around the corner and into the main restaurant, she saw that a large group of people were seated at a wooden table in the middle of the room. Clearly it was a tour
and, at the head of the table, she saw a familiar face: Vivian.

  Elizabeth ducked her head, retreating around the corner. The last person she wanted to run into was Vivian, with her overly done make-up and too-loud opinions. What was it Mary had told her? That the local Amish frowned upon Vivian’s tours and how she had bullied the one Amish family into letting her bring people to their homes?

  “Your table is ready,”the young hostess said, a plastic menu in her hands as she motioned to Elizabeth.“Follow me, please?”

  As she sat down at the table, she took the menu from the woman and thanked her before she reached into her purse, fishing around for her glasses.

  There was a burst of laughter from the other table and Elizabeth resisted the urge to look in that direction. Instead, she focused on the menu. Even though she hadn’t eaten much that day, she still wanted to keep it simple. A salad perhaps, she thought.

  “Well fancy seeing you here.”

  Elizabeth looked up at the sound of the familiar voice.

  Carl stood there with a woman at his side. The brunette smiled at her but said nothing as Carl greeted her.“Thought you’d be busy packing,”he said.

  She looked at the woman next to him, just a quick glance, before she returned her attention to Carl.“Tomorrow,”she said.“After church.”

  He nodded but didn’t comment. A moment of awkward silence fell between them, broken only when the woman at his side nudged him.“I’m sorry,”he said, stepping aside to introduce his companion to her.“Elizabeth, this is Marianne.”He paused.“We were just leaving.”

  Reluctantly, Elizabeth accepted the outstretched hand and shook it, forcing what she hoped was a warm smile onto her face. Inside, she felt a large wave of disappointment.

  “Seems to be the happening place around here,”Elizabeth said, glancing at the large table where Vivian sat.

  He looked over his shoulder.“Ah, yes. The evening musical tour,”he said, his words low so that no one else could hear.“Complete with pizza and soda beforehand.”He returned his eyes to look down at Elizabeth.“And the salad, lest we forget. It’s included in the tour, after all,”he said, a hint of a teasing in his tone.