Mad About the Boy

by Maggie Alderson

  I was still thinking about it when I was startled by a roaring sound outside. I looked up to see a huge motorbike pull up. The door opened and a terrifying person walked in. His head was bald, but he had a thick black beard almost to his waist. He was wearing a leather waistcoat which revealed arms and a chest entirely covered in tattoos, which went right up his neck and onto his shaved head. He had an enormous silver ring through the middle of his nose, like a prize bull.

  After the four strange men who had come into the shop yesterday, I was beginning to feel extremely disturbed by the turn my clientele was taking. Maybe they had been casing the joint and he had a sawn-off shotgun down the leg of his filthy jeans.

  ‘I’m looking for someone called Antonia,’ he said, wiping his nose with the back of his hand.

  ‘You’re looking at her,’ I said, terrified, but trying not to sound it.

  ‘This is for you,’ he said.

  He handed me a piece of paper. I looked down to see the following words: James McLoughlin, Unit 6, 32 Waratah Street, Bondi Beach.

  It was written in blue biro, in really bad handwriting that I knew I had seen somewhere before. Suddenly I got it – it was Spider’s writing. I looked up to see the biker climbing back onto his enormous bike. I ran to the door. He already had his helmet on.

  ‘Wait,’ I said. ‘Did Spider give this to you?’

  ‘Maybe,’ he said, revving up.

  ‘Did he, or didn’t he?’ I shouted over the din.

  ‘Did,’ said the biker and roared off.

  Fifteen minutes later I was ringing the doorbell at 32 Waratah Street, Bondi Beach. So this is where he lives, I thought. In one of those old deco blocks just off Campbell Parade. Now I knew, it seemed like exactly the place where James would live. I should have guessed.

  There was no answer from the buzzer, but I kept pushing it anyway and after a few minutes I heard a voice calling me from above. I looked up to see James leaning out of a window. He was grinning.

  ‘I can’t believe it,’ he said. ‘You found me. Come up. Third floor. Watch out, I’m going to throw the keys down.’

  I ran up the stairs, let myself in and walked into the flat to see James propped in an armchair, with his feet up on a large pile of books. Both legs were in plaster to the thigh. I ran over to him.

  ‘Oh my God,’ I said. ‘What on earth has happened to you?’

  ‘I’d ask you to sit on my knee, but I haven’t got any any more,’ he said, pulling me down onto the arm of the chair and bending my face down to his. He gave me one of his unbearably sexy slow kisses.

  ‘God, it’s good to see you,’ he said.

  I had so many questions I didn’t know what to say first.

  ‘So why didn’t you bloody ring me then? It’s been a week!’ I practically yelled at him, feeling the same kind of desperate loving anger that overcomes a mother when she is reunited with a child who was briefly lost. The only time I had ever smacked Tom was when I had lost him once, for five minutes, at Disneyland.

  ‘I was too ashamed, Antonia,’ he said. ‘After all my carrying on about security and then I got bloody done over. So much for the kung fu man.’

  ‘Who did this to you?’

  ‘Frankie Sullivan’s goons – I think. They didn’t introduce themselves.’

  ‘I don’t understand why you didn’t call me, I’ve been worried sick – with good reason, I now see.’

  ‘I didn’t call because I was worried about you,’ he said. ‘With your friend Dee and everything, it was all a bit too close and I didn’t want them making the connection between us. They’re capable of anything. I was lucky they didn’t kill me. I think they wanted to, but they were disturbed.’

  We just looked at each other. I was overwhelmed by feelings. Relief and joy to see him, fury at what had happened to him and a sense of amazement that I was finally in his home. I got up and walked around trying to collect my thoughts. The flat was beautiful. A completely pristine white space, with the most amazing views of the ocean.

  Even the floor was white and the only furniture, apart from the chair he was sitting in, was a large futon. It had my needlepoint cushion on it. Otherwise the only decorations were more books, an orchid in a pot and a photograph of me stuck to the wall with masking tape. I wondered where on earth he’d got it – he’d never asked me for a picture. Then I realized it was the photo from my gym card enlarged.

  ‘I’ll have to get you a better picture than that,’ I said, marvelling at how porky my face had been. He smiled and looked a little bashful.

  ‘You weren’t supposed to see that,’ he said. ‘Secret boys’ business.’

  I went over and kneeled beside him, with my head on his lap.

  ‘Oh my poor darling,’ I said. ‘What have they done to you?’

  ‘They’ve smashed my knees with a baseball bat.’

  I kissed them through the plaster.

  ‘Will you get better?’

  He shrugged. ‘I’ve probably got a better chance than most people, because I was fit when it happened. But it’s going to take time. I’ll be Mr Limpy for a while.’

  ‘I’ll look after you, Mr Limpy,’ I said, firmly. It didn’t feel like it was the time to prevaricate. ‘I love you, James,’ I said. ‘I nearly went mad when I didn’t know where you were’

  He stroked my cheek.

  ‘I love you too, Grasshopper,’ he said. ‘I’ve been sitting here all these days wondering how could I bring myself to ring you and tell you what had happened and agonizing over whether it was too risky.’ He stopped and frowned. ‘How the hell did you find me, by the way?’

  ‘Spider sent me a message,’ I said.

  James punched the arm of his chair.

  ‘Good old Spider,’ he said, grinning and shaking his head. ‘He knows me better than I know myself. God, he’s a good friend. Best mate a man could have.’

  I was still bemused by this friendship, but it wasn’t the time to pursue it. I had a million more questions to ask him, but he was looking at me in a way that made my internal organs dance the Macarena.

  ‘Help me up, will you?’ he said. ‘And pass me my crutches.’

  I helped him out of the chair and he put the crutches under his arms.

  ‘It’s OK,’ he said, smiling at me. ‘We’re not going far.’

  After about four steps, he threw the crutches down and collapsed onto the futon.

  ‘Get over here,’ he said. ‘And show me a good time.’

  So I did.

  23

  ‘I rather like having you in my complete control,’ I said to James afterwards, lying on top of him.

  ‘I always knew you were a pervert,’ he said and, grabbing my hands behind my back in one of his, he rolled me over and pinned me down with one plastered leg. I pretended to protest.

  ‘Now what were you saying about control?’ he said.

  I went to push him away and caught sight of my watch.

  ‘Oh my God,’ I said. ‘It’s nearly three o’clock. I’ll have to go and meet Tom.’

  ‘Can’t Percy get him?’ said James.

  I shook my head.

  ‘Percy’s not on speakers with me,’ I said.

  ‘Oh dear, with me in hiding and Percy not speaking to you, you must have been a lonely girl.’

  ‘You don’t know the half of it, James,’ I said, thinking about Dee holed up with her stitches at the Silver Springs, but I had to sort Tom out before I told him about all that. I couldn’t find Percy, but after a couple of calls I managed to get hold of one of Vita’s mummies and she said they’d be delighted to take Tom home to stay the night.

  I lay back down and looked at James some more. I never tired of looking at his face. It was like some kind of miracle to me, the way everything was in just the right place, even the scar. He gazed back at me. What a pair of sops.

  ‘Will you stay with me tonight, Antonia?’ he asked quietly.

  I nodded.

  ‘Good,’ he said. ‘But first, will you go an
d get me some food? I’ve been living on miso soup for a week and you’ve just sapped the very last of my energy.’

  I went out and got a feast of a Thai takeaway and we ate it sitting on the futon, James propped up on the pillows, me cross-legged opposite him.

  ‘You know what you were saying about me being lonely?’ I said. He nodded, biting the tail off a tiger prawn.

  ‘Well, you and Percy weren’t the only people I’ve been missing.’

  His put his head on one side, questioningly.

  ‘Dee’s disappeared too,’ I said. ‘Well, she hasn’t disappeared like you did.’ I slapped his plaster cast. ‘I know where she is. She’s had some kind of stupid facelift and she’s hiding out at a spa in Queensland called the Silver Springs, until she can be seen in public again. Of course, she’s perfectly entitled to some time off, but I wish she could have given me a bit more warning. Mind you, she chose a good time to make herself scarce, because some really creepy guys came looking for her yesterday. I didn’t like the look of them at all.’

  ‘What kind of creepy guys?’ said James, narrowing his eyes as I told him about them.

  ‘Let me get this straight,’ said James, looking very serious. ‘There were two shifty blokes in suits and then two shifty blokes in leather jackets.’

  I nodded.

  ‘The second lot of blokes – did one of them have George Michael stubble and a big gold watch?’

  I nodded again.

  ‘Was the other one a really ugly short arse?’ he said.

  ‘Yes,’ I said. ‘Do you know them?’

  ‘Shit,’ said James, exhaling loudly through his mouth. ‘Those are the creeps that did me in. At least they were looking for her and not you, but I hate to think of them being anywhere near you. Fucking mongrels.’

  ‘Oh my God,’ I said. ‘I thought they were dodgy. Why do you think they were looking for Dee?’

  ‘They work for her husband. They must have been looking for her for him.’

  ‘But surely he knows she’s at the Silver Springs,’ I said, bewildered.

  ‘If that’s where she is,’ said James. ‘Have you spoken to her there?’

  ‘No,’ I said, starting to feel really stupid. ‘I left a message on her mobile, but she said they didn’t let you take calls up there.’

  ‘I think we should call her,’ said James.

  He was drumming his fingers on the futon. I could see his mind was racing. So was mine.

  ‘Who were the other two guys who came to the shop then, James?’ I asked.

  ‘Cops probably,’ said James. ‘We’ve suspected they were on to this for a while. It’s probably a good thing – as long as they’re the right cops.

  ‘Can you lend me your mobile?’ he said suddenly. ‘I can’t use mine at the moment. Security risk and all that. We’ve got a few calls to make.’

  First we rang the Silver Springs. They said Dee wasn’t there and hadn’t been there for over a year, since her last visit. At which point I started to feel sick.

  Then he called Spider.

  ‘Hey, Spiderman,’ he said. ‘Yeah, she’s here now. You cunning old bastard. Yeah, thanks. I owe you, man. Big time. Look, it’s really heating up with the four stooges. Mrs Sullivan’s disappeared and those goons that did me over have been in to Ant’s shop. It sounds like the cops have been in too and I don’t want any of those people anywhere near her. So I don’t think we can wait any longer. I’m going to call O’Hara. We can’t do any more of this undercover, it’s too dangerous.’

  I could hear Spider’s expletives coming down the phone. James held the handset away from his ear.

  ‘I know he is cop cunt scum, Spider, as you so delicately put it, but two dangerous men have been in to see my woman and I am not risking it. We’ve got enough on them now to make the case stick. I’ll call that guy at the Herald too, just in case O’Hara shafts us, OK?’

  There was another volley of profanity from Spider and James rang off, laughing.

  ‘Is it all to do with the King George Hospital still?’ I asked.

  ‘That and about three other beautiful sites they’re trying to cover in concrete. Your friend Mr Thorogood is up to his neck in it and I think we’ve got enough to nail them all.’

  I noticed the ‘we’, but said nothing. James was already on the phone to O’Hara, whoever he was. He certainly seemed to know James and appeared to be listening while James gave him a potted version of the story so far, including his concerns for Dee Sullivan’s personal safety. James made an appointment to see him first thing in the morning.

  Then he rang a journalist from the Sydney Morning Herald, whom he had told me about before. He was one of the good guys, James said, and having him on the story, at the same time as the police got all the information, would make sure it came out in public. He arranged to see him the next day too. The only thing he didn’t tell him about was Dee.

  ‘The cops have a better chance of finding her if Frankie – and the others – don’t know they’re looking for her too,’ he explained.

  After all that he called Spider back and gave him the update. Then he sank back onto his pillows and sighed.

  ‘Is it all nearly over?’ I asked him.

  ‘When we find Dee,’ he said. ‘She may well be recovering from her surgery somewhere else, but I just want to be sure. Then I hope I can take a break from all this until those bastards are in the dock, when I will be delighted to give evidence against them.’ He paused for a moment. ‘You might have to as well, you know, Antonia,’ he said. ‘Are you OK about that?’

  ‘Blimey,’ I said. ‘I’d never thought of that, but I suppose so. Eeek. Gosh, how terrifying. I’ve never been in a court.’

  ‘Don’t worry,’ said James, squeezing my hand. ‘I’ll get Spider to coach you. He’s had plenty of experience of them, as you can imagine.’

  ‘Do you work with Spider on this stuff?’ I asked.

  ‘He doesn’t really approve of it, actually, too close to cop work for him, but he backs me up when I need it. Like I told you, he’s my best mate.’

  I looked at him, not knowing how to take it any further. I still didn’t understand that relationship.

  ‘You don’t like Spider, do you?’ said James quietly.

  ‘I love him dearly,’ I said, ‘for giving me this address. And he was nice to me about you at the gym once too, but I’ve just … never met anyone like him before.’ I was searching for the right way to say ‘filthy biker scum’.

  ‘He’s a sentimental old bastard at heart,’ said James. ‘But I suppose you wonder why my best friend is a filthy old biker?’

  ‘Something like that,’ I admitted.

  James sighed.

  ‘I’m going to have to tell you something that is hard for me, Antonia. But I’ve had a lot of time to think over the past few days and I think you will understand me more if I do tell you. It might change how you feel about me, but at least you will understand.’

  ‘OK,’ I said, feeling sick. What was coming? Were they lovers?

  ‘Spider is my best mate,’ said James. ‘I met him in prison. We did time together. You get close to people inside.’

  I just stared at him. I’d never knowingly met a criminal before and now I realized I’d been sleeping with one for several months.

  James laughed wryly.

  ‘I know what you’re thinking,’ he said. ‘But I’m not a bank robber. Spider was, but I’m not. I was protesting about a toxic-waste dump they were building in a National Park. I firebombed the developers’ offices and then I sabotaged the diggers and earth-moving vehicles at the site and I’m afraid I assaulted a security guard who tried to stop me. I’m not proud of hurting him – he was just doing his job – but I am proud of the reason I did it. I got five years. I did nearly three.’

  I didn’t say anything. I didn’t know what to say.

  ‘Spider was the big man inside,’ continued James. ‘He was doing ten for armed robbery, not his first sentence either. He didn’t take any n
otice of me at first, but one day I happened to walk past when a really nasty guy with big ambitions had him cornered with a blade. I kicked it out of his hand, breaking his wrist. Spider looked after me from then on, like a brother. It was really rough in there and I don’t know what would have happened to me without Spider’s protection.’

  He looked at me and seemed satisfied that he could tell me more, without me running for the door.

  ‘I got out first,’ he said. ‘And when Spider got parole a couple of years later, I did what I could to help him to stay straight. It was a promise I’d made to him. His daughter was born a year before he went in and I found him crying in his cell one day, because it was her first day at school and he hadn’t been there to take her. That was when he swore he was never going down again and I promised to help him. I got him the job at the gym. So that’s why he’s my best mate. We look after each other. I know he’s rough, but he has a really good heart – as you found out today.’

  I just looked at him. It was a shock, but it did explain a lot – the secrecy, the mystery, the years unaccounted for. I felt around my feelings, rather as you probe your teeth with your tongue to find the sore one. Did it change the way I felt about him? No. So he’d been to prison? So what? It wasn’t like it was for rape or extorting money from old ladies.

  ‘Would you do anything like that again?’ I asked him. ‘Blowing things up?’

  He shook his head. ‘Definitely not. That was youthful folly. I still feel really strongly about these people who want to build everywhere for profit without giving a damn about what they are destroying, but I know violence is not the answer. Now I work only with bona fide conservation groups and try to catch the bastards out with the law. I had allowed my anger to pull me down to their level and I will never make that mistake again.’

  We looked at each other silently for a moment. He spoke first.

  ‘So does it put you off me, knowing that you have just been pashing an ex-con?’ he said.

  I could tell by his expression that it was a serious question.

  ‘Not in the slightest,’ I said.