Deceptive Secrets

by RM Walker

  “Oi! You two! Let’s get going before it’s dark.” Nate’s voice rang out from below.

  She pulled away and the flash of guilt on her face was like cold water over him as she moved to the steps. She shouldn’t be guilty, she wasn’t cheating on anyone.

  “You’re my girlfriend too.” He caught her hand and pulled her around to face him.

  He couldn’t tell what she was thinking, not even when she smiled at him.

  He opened his mouth to tell her that he knew she’d kiss the others in the same way. That it was what they’d all agreed on. But no words came as a mental image of what it meant flashed into his mind.

  Maybe it wasn’t as okay as he thought it was going to be.

  “Matt?”

  “Come on down, number seventeen, your time is up,” Josh hollered.

  Irritation swept through him. “You go on. Tell them I’ll catch up.” He turned away from her, making it look like he was watching the sun set over the tree line.

  Was this any different from Connie?

  Lily wasn’t cheating though. It was their idea, not hers. And it was an idea he’d jumped on because he knew he didn’t stand a chance if she had to choose.

  He felt her touch his back, and he turned in surprise.

  “I’m your girlfriend too.” She went onto her toes and kissed him. Catching his hand tugged him towards the steps.

  This was nothing like Connie. He’d be fine with sharing her because she was his girlfriend too.

  Bootlegger brine

  “Am I going to be corralled into a gunfight outside?” she whispered.

  She’d stepped through the door, and everyone in the pub stopped talking to look at her.

  “What?” Nate came in behind her with the others.

  “Y’know, like in the westerns? The cowboy walks into the saloon and everyone stops to look at him.”

  “It’s ‘cause you’re a stranger. You’re with us, you’ll be fine,” Nate said.

  “And if I wasn’t with you? Pitchforks at dawn?”

  “Listen up!” The bartender clapped his hands once. “It’s the young lady’s birthday. Happy birthday, lassie!”

  Happy birthday cheers rang out with clapping and whistling. Her cheeks heated as she waved shyly, smiling.

  The twins led her to the bar, and she grinned at the tall man behind it. He had a shock of black hair and bright blue, friendly eyes.

  “Lily, this is Uncle Jimmy. Uncle, this is Lily,” Josh introduced her.

  “You’re a brave one to make friends with my boys.” He held his hand to her, and she took it to shake, but he lifted her hand to his lips. His eyes twinkled as he winked at her.

  “Stop flirting, Uncle.” Josh pulled her into his side. “We’re starving.”

  “You’re always starving. Go on, sit yourselves down. I’ll send Annie over to get your orders in a minute.”

  She looked around her as they led her to the left side of the bar. Overhead, black beams had horseshoe brasses nailed into them. A wooden shelf, holding ornate Toby jugs and plates with patterns that looked as old as the pub, ran around the plastered stone walls just below the uneven ceiling. One side of the pub held round tables with chairs, a dartboard, and a snooker table. The other side was a dining area with high backed wooden bench seats and tables.

  Sepia Victorian photographs of the pub hung on the walls. Someone’s enormous prized pig had been immortalised forever in paint. A painting of a hunt with a pack of dogs jumping a hedge into the trees hung near the bar. The scarlet of the rider’s coats like drops of blood on an otherwise dreary picture.

  Matt sat down at a window table, and she slid in after him. Nate sat on her other side and the twins sat opposite.

  Nate handed her a menu. “Pick what you want.”

  “Thanks.” She read down the prices and was relieved to see it wasn’t too expensive.

  Matt leant behind her to poke Nate’s shoulder. “They’ve got stargazy pie.”

  Jake laughed. “Hey, Lil, fancy the stargazy pie?”

  “Stargazy? That sounds fun.” She found it on the menu. “What is it? It doesn’t say.”

  Matt took his phone out, tapped on it, then slid it across the table in front of her.

  “Are those heads?” She grabbed the phone and peered in horror at the picture of fish heads poking through the crust, complete with eyes.

  “Yep, Pilchards, they’re gazing skywards, hence the name,” Josh said. “You’re in Cornwall now, Lily, ’tis a Cornish dish.” His accent thickened, and he nudged Jake beside him. “Vegetable lasagne.”

  “I’ll have the stargazy pie,” Nate said and closed his menu.

  “You mean you’re actually going to eat it?” Lily pushed the phone back towards Matt.

  “Not the heads. The fish is skinned and boned, just the heads and tails are poking out,” Nate explained.

  “There’s tails in there too?” Her stomach roiled with nausea.

  “So, you don’t fancy it then?” Jake winked at her.

  “No, not even if I was starving and there was nothing else.” She pulled a face at him.

  “What do you want?” Matt asked.

  “Can I have the steak and ale pie, please?” she asked.

  “Lily Pad, your choice in food—”

  “Shut it!” Nate barked. “She can eat what she bloody well wants to. Don’t start on that shit.”

  “It’s not shit. And if you were us, you’d be feeling the same,” Jake pointed out.

  “Yeah? Well, let’s thank the higher powers I’m not you, either of you. So, it’s a moot point.” Nate folded his arms on the table.

  “What are you talking about?” Lily asked.

  “They’re on a crusade, a losing one,” Matt drawled, still looking at his menu. “Knickerbocker glory. Lord, I love Uncle Steve.”

  “What crusade?” She looked over at the twins.

  “We just wanted to point out that meat doesn’t need to be consumed at every meal. In fact, it needn’t be consumed at all.”

  “You’re vegetarian?” Thinking about it, she’d never seen them eat anything with meat in it, it just hadn’t clicked before.

  “We would be, wouldn’t we?” Josh said.

  “That is a load of shit, and you know it. Aunt April took you off it when you were three, I don’t think that was a conscious decision.” Nate sneered at them.

  “Besides, we’ve told you—bless it, thank it for sustaining you, and bingo, burgers are a go.” Matt slid his arm around her waist.

  “We don’t live in the bronze age when man had to hunt to survive.” Jake lifted an eyebrow, nodding.

  “You’re just embarrassed to say it goes straight through you.” Nate snorted.

  They blushed brightly, and she felt bad for them. “That’s ok, I can’t eat eggs unless they’re in a cake. I get horrific stomach ache until they go through me.” She groaned, covering her eyes with her palm. “I can’t believe I just blurted that out.”

  “Beans make Nate fart for England.” Josh sent Nate a mocking smile.

  Nate flipped him off. “At least I didn’t make an artform of farting the longest, like Matt.”

  “That was years ago.” Matt shook his head. “Guys, we’re trying to impress her, bodily functions are probably not the way to go.”

  “Hey, do you still need a minute or have you all decided?”

  A young, friendly looking woman came up to the table with a pad and pen, smiling at them widely.

  “Hi, Annie,” Nate said. “This is Lily, it’s her eighteenth.”

  “Happy birthday, Lily.” She smiled at Lily. “What would you like?”

  “Thanks.” Lily smiled and gave her order.

  The others gave theirs, and she winked at Lily before leaving them.

  “Go and pick your poison.” Nate slid a ten-pound note towards her.

  “Coke’s fine.” She didn’t pick it up. It was enough they were buying her meal.

  “C’mon, this is your eighteenth, a rite of pass
age. Something to cross off the bucket list of life,” Josh coaxed.

  “I’ve drunk alcohol before.”

  “You haven’t walked up to the bartender and ordered an alcoholic drink though, have you?” Jake asked her.

  “Well, no.”

  “Exactly, off you go,” Josh ordered. “Matt, let her out.”

  “Bloody hell, who died and made you two Nate?” Matt snapped as he got up. “You’re too bossy. One is enough.”

  “I’ve no idea what you’re on about, Matt.” Nate tucked the money into her hand as she passed him. “Don’t argue.”

  She smiled at them. “Thank you.” She crossed over to the bar with no idea what she wanted.

  “And here’s the birthday girl.” Uncle Jimmy came over to her, slinging a towel over his shoulder. “Pick yer poison, lass, it’s on the house.”

  “They’ve given me the money.”

  “They can buy the next one.” He winked at her. “Have you drunk before?”

  “Wine, champagne, and cider,” she replied. “But that’s all.”

  “Well, this is a country pub, lass, so the limit of my cocktails is a Bloody Mary. But I can set you up with spirits, or you can stick to what you know.”

  She debated the bottles hanging upside down behind him. “I like coconut, can I try that one, please?” She pointed to the white bottle.

  “Coke, lemonade, or peach schnapps with it?”

  “I have no idea,” she admitted.

  “I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’ll make the three up and you can choose. It’ll just be a taste, okay?”

  “Thanks, sounds good.”

  “The boys tell me you’re new to the area. How are you liking it here?” he asked as he setup the shot glasses.

  “It’s beautiful. I love it here.”

  “It is a lovely part of the country,” he agreed. “And which of my nefarious nephews have made a play for you?”

  Heat flooded her cheeks as he set the glasses in front of her.

  “All of them?” He laughed, shaking his head. “Now why doesn’t that surprise me? They’re good boys though, you’ll be safe with them.”

  “They’re my best friends,” she replied.

  He caught her eyes and the easy-going grin changed into a soft smile. “You’ll not do wrong sticking with them.” He tapped the first glass. “This is the bootlegger kicker, Coke in this one. Bootlegger lass with lemonade, and the last is the bootlegger brine with peach schnapps and lemonade.”

  She tried them all, pulling a face at the first one that made him laugh. She liked the last one best of all and she gave him a wide smile and a thumbs up.

  “We have a winner.” He cleared the glasses away and made up the drink in a proper tumbler. “Drink responsibly. No mixing your drinks, okay? You don’t want alcohol poisoning on your birthday.”

  “Thank you so much.” She smiled at him. “Can I also have four Cokes for the boys, please?” She took out her own money to pay for them.

  “Of course, you can.” He started filling pint glasses with Coke. He got to the last one and whistled loudly making Lily jump. “Oi! One of you reprobates want to pretend you’re a gentleman and help the lady with your drinks?”

  Josh got up and came over. “We’re always gentlemen, Uncle.”

  “Is that right?” His uncle lifted an eyebrow, smirking at him.

  Josh pulled a face and picked up the tray of drinks.

  She took her glass and followed him back to the table, sliding in next to Matt and pushed the money back at Nate.

  “No way our drinks were on the house. How did you pay?” Josh passed the glasses around.

  “This round is on me,” Lily replied and sipped at her drink. “This is so nice.”

  “Next drink use the money,” Nate ordered, and she smiled into her glass.

  “Toast!” Matt held up his glass. “Happy birthday to our girl. May this be the first of many we’ll share with you.”

  “Aye!” She clinked her glass to theirs. “This is the best birthday I’ve ever had. Thank you.”

  Time could stand still, and she’d be happy.

  Drunk.

  She stretched her arms above her head, wiggling in the seat. Her blouse rose, exposing a wide swath of her stomach, catching Nate’s attention. He saw Matt looking in the same direction, and a quick glance at the twins confirmed they were also entranced. He tugged her shirt down before anyone else could see, but his knuckles brushed against her skin, making her squeal.

  “Oh, Jesus! Sorry! No!” He jerked back and fell from the seat onto his back, catching his arm on the table. Pain shot through his elbow, and he swore.

  “I’m sorry. I’m ticklish.”

  “We know.” The twins spoke together, making her giggle.

  “Hey, Nate, send us a postcard next time,” Matt teased.

  He ignored Matt as he sat down. “Sorry, I was just—”

  “He was preserving your modesty,” Jake interrupted. “You were showing half an inch of flesh, which in this village is punishable by an hour in the stocks.”

  “Asshole,” Nate snapped.

  “Thank you, Nate. You’re a gentleman.” Lily kissed his cheek, and he sent the twins a smug look which was returned with a sneer.

  “I need the ladies room, whoa!” She got up and gripped the table. “The floor is moving, who’s moving the floor?”

  Nate stood up, looking at her closely. Her cheeks were red, and her eyes glazed. He let her out and grabbed her when she stumbled. She giggled, kissed his cheek and swayed her way towards the toilets, narrowly avoiding the other tables. It dawned on him just as Josh said, “Oh, shit! We’ve got her drunk.”

  “How can we, she’s only had—” Matt hesitated. “How many has she had?”

  “Well, the first, another with the food, and the one she’s just finished. But they’re mostly peach and lemonade, right?” Jake said.

  “It’s mostly rum. And peach schnapps is alcoholic on its own,” Nate said. “Damn, we should have watched her better—oh shit! She’s had four! Annie brought her one with dessert.” His stomach sank, he’d promised to keep her safe and he’d fucked up.

  “Four?”

  “Uncle Jimmy wouldn’t let her have that many,” Jake said. “Are you sure it was four?”

  Matt tapped a glass. “Well, there’s two glasses here—”

  “And how’s my favourite nephews doing? Where’s your friend?” Uncle Jimmy came up with an empty tray for the glasses and plates.

  “She’s in the loo. We may have messed up,” Nate admitted, hoping Uncle Jimmy would know what to do.

  “You can’t afford it?” Uncle Jimmy sent him a sideways eye roll. “Pay what you can, and we’ll sort the rest dreckly.”

  “Um, no, we can afford it. We may have lost count on how many drinks she’s had,” Matt spoke up.

  Uncle Jimmy straightened and folded his arms, looking around at them all. “She’s had three. Three is her limit, she can’t have any more. Three will make her tipsy, but it won’t affect her too much tomorrow.”

  “So, you gave her three. What about the one Annie brought over? Did you do that one as well?” Nate asked.

  Uncle Jimmy frowned and closed his eyes briefly. “I didn’t know Annie got her one. Looks like four, lads. Who’s volunteering for puke duty?”

  “Oh, bugger. Is that enough to get her drunk?” Josh asked.

  “She’s a newbie, boys, two glasses of wine would see her tipsy. Four rum and peach schnapps will have her dancing on the tables if she’s of a mind too. How does she look?”

  “She wanted to know why the floor was moving,” Matt said.

  “Ah. Well, she ate everything on her plate and a dessert. That’ll soak some of it up. She might get lucky and only have a headache tomorrow. It’ll be a lesson well learnt. One you’ll remember for your eighteenths, I hope.”

  “And will our first drink be on the house like Lily’s was, Uncle Jimmy?” Jake asked. He was the only one who didn’t look horrified they’d
got their girlfriend drunk.

  “What, with your ugly mugs?” He roared with laughter. “I expect so. Ah, here comes the little lady, take her home and hydrate her. Hold on, I’ll get you a bottle of water.” He went back to the bar.

  “So, what are we doing now?” She bounced on her feet excitedly. “I know. Let’s go skinny dipping at the quarry.”

  Nate slapped a hand over his eyes, groaning. What the hell were they going to do now?

  She sat next to him and slid her arms around his waist. “Are you embarrassed to be naked with me?” She leant her chin on his shoulder and pressed her mouth to his ear. “’Cause it’s okay, I’ve seen your butt. It’s a very nice butt. You’re sexy so don’t be shy.” Her lips tickled him, her hot breath ghosting over his skin, sending pleasure rippling through him. She didn’t know what she was saying, but certain parts of him didn’t care.

  “Oh. I know.” She ripped away from him, turning to face the others, and he used the moment to adjust himself. At least she wasn’t a morose drunk

  “Let’s go to the treehouse and play strip-poker. We can all get naked and commune with nature like real wit—”

  Matt slapped his hand over her mouth just in time. “C’mon, baby, I think we should get some fresh air.”

  Maybe it would’ve been better if she was a morose drunk.

  “I like you, Matthew.” She giggled. “I mean I really, really like you. And you, Joshua, Jacob, I really, really like you too. Ignatius? Ignatius?”

  Nate clenched his fists and got up, aware the twins were clutching each other in silent laughter. “I’m here, and it’s Nate, remember? Not Ignatius.”

  “I know, Ignatius, but I really like you too, and your name,” she cooed.

  “And we like you too, baby,” Matt said and moved her towards the door. “Nate, get the tab. We’ll settle up when it’s safe.”

  Nate moved away from the wreck that was his girlfriend. How could he have been so stupid to let her drink that much? And Lynda? What the hell was Lynda going to say? They couldn’t take her home like that. She’d skin them alive.

  “Well, Nate, my boy.” Uncle Jimmy leant on the bar. “One too many I expect.”

  “I mucked it up for her.” Nate slumped against the bar.