Repair Me

by Melissa Phillips

  When he placed the cutting boards in place, my body jumped from being tense. Pulling a knife from the stand, he began cutting each breast in long strips. He never looked back when he started talking. “Where did he touch you, Avery?” He caught me off guard. There was no 'hello', no 'good evening' or even a 'how are you'. Davien's words were only short, but much strength behind them. I could tell he didn't want to hear the answer. He didn't even want to ask, but he knew he had to. He wanted the truth whether it hurt him or not. I could tell from his voice that he had thought about the incident all afternoon and it was killing him.

  I didn't want to answer. There was no good answer. I figured after his conversation with Justin everything would be dropped. Noticing that I wouldn't answer, he looked over his shoulder. Anger built in his voice with each word. “Where did he touch you, Avery?” I shrugged my shoulders. He dropped the knife to the cutting board and walked to the sink. Filling his hands with soap, he began scrubbing and drying them. Then stepped to me where he placed his hands on my upper arms. “Show me.”

  “No, Davien.” I shook my head with shame. “You'll make me leave and I'm not going back to that house.”

  His chest rose when he inhaled deeply. “Show me!” He yelled loud enough for Scott to stop strumming his guitar. The whole apartment went quiet after Davien's strong demand. Knowing that we were in view from where Scott could see us, Davien walked us to the side of the kitchen. “Where?” His brows darted to my face.

  Dropping my head in shame, I followed his order. I ran my hands around my waist extremely slowly, imitating Anthony's touch. Then I cupped my chin, trailed the hem of my shirt until I began raising it over my head. With my chest was unclothed, I placed my hands over my breasts, where I trailed my fingers in circles. Davien's eyes were stuck on my moves as I heard his loud pants. He grabbed my wrist as soon as I began lowering my zipper to my jeans.

  Instead of him getting mad at me, he took me downstairs and undressed me in the bathroom. Turning the shower on, he removed his clothes as well. With both of us stepping to the shower hand in hand, the water fell over us. He reached for the body wash and turned me until he began washing my body from head to foot, stopping at each spot I had shown him to cleanse me further. His eyes never left my body as he watched me. He played it off like it was water, but I noticed the few stray tears fall directly from his eye.

  Standing straight, he placed his hands at the back of my head and pulled me close to him until my breasts fell against his chest. Then he used the strength from his chest to press me against the tiled wall along the shower. His hand moved to the tile on each side of my head. He brushed wet locks of my hair from my face as he watched the hurt in my eyes. As always, he began singing to me the best way he knew how to comfort me. When he sang 'Stay' by Rihanna and Mikky Ekko, he sang both parts to the duet. After the chorus, he started with the second portion of the duet.

  Like every time, he sang with his lips locked almost to my ear. Surprising both of us, I took over the song and began singing back to him. My heart was racing with shock that I had attempted to sing in front of a man with a godly voice. Without the confidence he had, I whispered the words only enough for him to hear. Shock hit his face and his eyes lift to look at my lips as I sang to him for the first time. My voice was dreadful, but I wanted him to hear the words, the same way I loved to hear his. His voice was amazing, but the words he always chose meant the most.

  He lowered his mouth to meet my neck, his ear held to my slightly opened lips, until he could hear my voice clear. His breathing came slower, he calmed at my words. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled his mouth tight against my body. The feeling was strange, but I felt like our voices were making love to each others.” You sound beautiful, Avery.” He smiled with a huge grin.

  His lips met mine into an intense passionate kiss until our words disappeared. Taking over my body, his hands explored me from my neck to my breast, down my abdomen, until he reached between my thighs. “Did he touch your here?” I shook my head. He gripped onto my hips and lift me until my legs wrapped around his waist. “No where else?” I shook my head again and I saw the intense relief in his eyes.

  He lowered my hips until I sat above his growing erection. I dug my fingernails into his shoulder blades as he lowered me around him. “Oh my God.” I moaned out. “Davien.”

  “Mhhh, Avery, I love you so much.” He whispered in my ear as he guided my body up and down with a steady pace.

  “I love you too, Davien.” I replied between my winded breaths. His lips trailed kisses up and down my neck, over my bare breasts until our lips locked onto each other.

  Chapter 11

  I was just lowering my gown over my head when Davien entered the bedroom wearing his wet towel. It reminded me of the first night we made love. The night when I wondered what he had on under the towel. What a stupid thought! Did I really expect him to be wearing jeans underneath? That night when I heard the towel hit the floor, my heart jumped and my breathing stopped for long moments. Now that feeling caused my body to tingle, knowing what I had waiting underneath. It was no longer a surprise, but always a gift.

  His towel dropped to the floor next to his side and he jumped on the bed and pulled his arm around my waist. “You sure you're okay, Avery?” Playfully kissing up my arms until his lips reached my neck. I giggled at the tickle from his touch.

  Nodding my head, I reassured him “Yes, Davien. The only worry I had the entire time was that you would leave me.” Turning to face him, I scoot closer to him. “Or you would make me leave the apartment.”

  “You can try, but you're not going anywhere, Avery.” We both chuckled. “Hey I think you need to call Natalia and let her know what happened today. Let her know you're okay.”

  He passed the phone to me and jumped to kiss me before I dialed. Smiling at him, I called Natalia's number. “Hey, Avery, what's up?”

  “Well I guess I need to let you know that I had a little confrontation with Anthony today.” She gasped and I imagined her hands coming to her mouth.

  It was then that I realized that Davien had never heard the actual story. He knew the simple facts. He knew Anthony had touched me in places he would never allow to be touched. More than that, he knew that Anthony had told me things that were in appropriate for my relationship with Davien and he felt betrayed. More than anything I wasn't comfortable telling him the Anthony assumed Davien was unfaithful to me.

  I hoped it wasn't true, but I knew that Davien had a past of being a very flirtatious man. He had a reputation that was very obvious and many times I wondered how many people were in my shoes before me. How many women had laid in his arms and felt his touch. One of our most intimate moments that I had grown to love more than anything was his songs to my ears, only my ears. Each song was hand picked with obvious lyrics to what was currently happening in our relationship. Even though it was another artists song, it felt like our story being told when he sang them.

  I knew there was a large possibility that Davien was still being his old self, but I told myself on a daily basis that he wasn't like that, or was he? He promised me that he had changed, but I was sure he had many women believing the same line. Trying my best to believe him, to trust him and have faith in our relationship I convinced myself that he was honest. I was stuck looking at him before I continued with my words. I didn't want him to hear, but I couldn't walk away either. “Tell her, Avery,” he placed his hand on my thigh and tried to soothe me as he ran his fingers up and down my leg “it's okay, baby.”

  “What!” She screamed into the phone. “What the hell do you mean, Avery?”

  I took a deep breath and laid my eye's on Davien before speaking. “I was just finishing up from cleaning the apartment when the doorbell rang. I figured it was the postal delivery with a package for the guys like usual. When I opened the door, Anthony was there. I tried backing away, but he only followed. He threatened me, because I came to his house, that he could come here... the guys beat him up, so he was g
oing to do the same to me.” I watched Davien's eyes sadden, but I continued my story as he had asked. “I repeatedly asked him to leave, but he ignored my requests. I even told him that Davien was here, but he only told me I was stupid and he knew that he was at work. Anthony told me he missed me and he said I needed to come home, I had taken long enough of a break.”

  I didn't want to continue with my story, but Davien knew I had more to tell and he nodded his head for me to continue and his brows rose as he waited for my words to appear. I didn't know whether I was talking to Natalia or really telling the story to Davien. I stuttered on my next few sentences and with each sentence, Davien's jaw's clenched tighter and his nostrils flared with pain. “Then he pulled my shirt over my head and told me Davien was only a boy toy, I needed a man. He asked if I really wanted to live with a couple of bachelors in an apartment when I had a whole house to come home to.” Davien squinted his eyes as he fought the scene that he was picturing.

  Tears were falling from my eyes as I watched Davien tense even more. “Then he touched my breasts and told me that he knew Davien was cheating.” Davien jumped from the bed and shook his head repeatedly. His fingers gripping at his hair as he tried to avoid the words from his ears. “He said that Davien...... sleeps around. But that he would never cheat on me his self if I came home.” I turned my back to Davien when I said my last sentence to my story. “Then he unzipped my pants.” I didn't want to see his expressions. I knew he was hurt. I wasn't sure if the words that Anthony spoke or the physical touching made Davien more mad.

  “Oh my God, Avery. What the hell! Are you okay?” Natalia yelled with anger in her voice. “He didn't do anything like....?”

  “No, nothing went beyond that. I'm fine. I was running Justin back and forth to Martin's today to get his car repaired and I didn't hear my phone when he called so he came to the house to check on me. He happened to come at the perfect moment... for me... not Anthony.” I chuckled at the only funny part of my story. “I didn't see the rest, but let's just say he's not coming back.” I smiled to Davien. “And I'm not returning to his house.... Ever!”

  “You should have called me.”

  “That's what I'm doing right now Natalia.”

  “No, I meant earlier. Don't hold things back from me. You're my best friend and it bothers me when I don't know what is going on with you.” Her voice was calming down and becoming more friendly. “I love you girly.”

  “I love you too.” I replied, a smiled reappeared to Davien's lips and I knew things were going to be fine. “So anyways... are we still on for tomorrow night?”

  “Yep, I'm planning on coming over at 6 o'clock, sound good?” Natalia replied.

  “Sounds great! Six it is. The guys are ordering Chinese, then were taking off for the fight from there.” I smiled as Davien dropped back to the bed with me and pulled me over him. My knees straddled his waist and while I was still speaking to Natalia, he began kneading at my gown covered breasts.

  “I am so excited.” Her voice was cheerful. “Did Scott tell you that I'm bringing Khloe with?” Khloe was the new girl in Natalia's apartment. She had just transferred to the college and Natalia had one other room mate, Laura who was never actually there. They needed the extra money for bills and Khloe was the perfect match for Natalia. She was shy but extremely friendly. I loved her the minute I met her. And I was so happy for Natalia to finally have a room mate that she could spend time with. Their rules were very strict with no over-nighters and so many nights, Natalia spent her nights alone.

  I was thrilled when Scott told me there was a possibility of Khloe joining us, but when Natalia confirmed it, made me thrilled. “Oh my God, she agreed to come? That is awesome!” I couldn't wait.

  “I know. We'll have to let her in slowly, she's a quiet one. But I think she'll have a blast.” The first day I met Khloe, I fell in love with her. She was exactly what I wanted for Natalia. She was down to earth and shy but Natalia was breaking her in.

  ☼

  After a long conversation with Natalia, I finally placed the phone on Davien's nightstand. We laced our fingers together and with me still straddling him, I bent to kiss him. He dropped my hands and lowered his arms around my back. “I'm so sorry about today, Avery.” I kissed him again. His lips met my neck where he took my neck with full force to his mouth. “I'm staying home tomorrow, we can spend the day together.” His grin grew across his entire face.

  “Are you serious?” I pulled from his firm grasp to watch him as he spoke “I don't want you getting in trouble at work.”

  “You come first, Avery.” His model perfect face looked amazing as he held me against him. I still found it unbelievable that this man was my boyfriend. A couple of months ago I thought he was the most attractive man ever. He was everything I wanted and everything I needed to run from. But he caught me and I was trapped by his love. With laughter in his eyes, he asked, “ Wanna play our game?”

  “Our game?” I jumped to my back and shot his a curious look.

  “You know,” his grin turned devilish “the one where we ask each other questions and expect honest answers... then you admit to wanting to have sex with me.”

  “Stop it, Davien.” I slapped his shoulder. “Okay, let's do it. I have nothing to lose now. You know all of my answers and hopefully I know yours also. Yeah I guess I was telling you the truth when I said I wanted to have sex with you.”

  He wiggled his brows at me. “I knew you wanted it,” He reached to kiss me. “but I wanted it more.” Full of comical laughter and him wrapping his arm around my waist, made me feel even more anxious to play our game. The truth always came out and without this game, who knows where we would be?

  I looked around the room as I thought of my many questions. “Are you gonna be honest?”

  “Always have, baby.” He quickly answered. No doubt to his mind that he would ever lie. He was never embarrassed by his questions or his answers.

  “Okay....hmm... alright, Davien are you mad at me for everything that happened today?” I asked, not wanting to see the answer on his face.

  “I'm not mad at you, Avery, never have been. Except that brief moment when I wondered if you had slept with Justin. I don't know if I could have ever forgave you.” I could hear the honest anger behind his words. “But I was mad at the situation.”

  “Fair enough.”

  “My turn.” He turned to face me, his aspect was of a child waiting for an exciting treat .“Are you happy here?” He pointed over the room.

  “Yes, very much so. I love this place.” I stuttered in my questions, trying to figure out my next nosy question. “Alright.. honest answer... did you think I did something sexually with Anthony, willing or not?”

  “I would've killed the mother fucker. He may be an ass, but I don't think he's quite that stupid.” He inhaled deeply as I heard the strain in his voice and I could tell he didn't want to ask me the next question. “At one time during your conversation with Anthony, did you have doubts with our relationship... be honest.”

  Why was he doing this to me? “Yes, Davien I did.” His arm dropped from my waist and a space grew between the two of us.

  “Why, Avery? I would never do that to you.” He begged for my honest answer that he didn't want.

  “Because you are Davien Dodge, the bad boy, man whore from The Pits. I knew the first day I met you that you weren't my type. I was intimidated by you and your little female friends. I'm just curious whether or not our relationship means as much to you as it does to me.”

  “It means more, Avery. You have no idea. When you say 'my little female friends'.... that really is what they are. Nothing more. And I've told you before that I regret a lot of things I've done in the past, but it's done.” He sighed and I couldn't tell whether it was anger or frustration, maybe even relief to his sigh. The room was quiet as I looked around. The room was dark as the hours had flown by, the only light came from his alarm clock on his nightstand. The glowing light reflected over the walls where I saw the framed
photos of various musicians.

  As I thought about his answer, I still wondered if he was actually telling me the truth. Why would a man like Davien want to date Avery, simple ol' Avery? I had nothing to give him. “Davien, why me?” I broke the silence.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean why do you want to be with me when you have so many other women to chose from? I have nothing to give you.”

  “You gave me your heart.” He smiled as he pecked my lips. “I couldn't ask for more.”

  “Me either.”

  “All right let's get back to the game.” He laughed, but within seconds his voice returned serious. “Avery, do you really want to be with me? I mean do you doubt our relationship sometimes?”

  “Yes, of course I want to be with you. But yes, I do worry about our relationship. But who doesn't at some time or another.” Okay, here it comes, the obvious answer, but it was always wonderful to hear it from Davien's lips. I could never get tired of hearing him. “Do you love me?” We had told each other repeatedly that we loved each other, and I meant it. And off course he loved me, we had been together for a short time, but our time had been strong. Even after a day of questioning betrayal between us.... we were still very much in love. Every time we had a falling, it seemed to grow our relationship even stronger.

  “Do you want the truth?” His face was serious and waiting for my response as I nodded my head. A smile was forming across my lips. “No Avery, I don't love you, I don't......”.