Designated Daddy

by Jane Toombs

  “No problem. She can go several days without vitamins. In the old days there weren’t any such thing and babies not only survived, they thrived.”

  He nodded. “Still thinking of shooting me?”

  “I wouldn’t know how if I did want to,” she countered. “I’ve never held a gun in my hand until the other night when I accidentally grabbed yours.”

  “Not even that old Colt of your father’s?”

  “I was terrified of that gun. Renee picked it up once when he was gone and I ran off like a scared rabbit.”

  Steve filed her comment away. Renee evidently hadn’t been afraid to touch the Colt. He followed Victoria to the changing table.

  “You didn’t happen to have lunch at Willa’s, did you?” he asked.

  She shook her head. “Tea and sympathy.”

  He let that lay. “Good. I brought back a surprise for lunch. When you get Heidi settled we’ll eat.”

  He wanted to please her—needed to—which bothered him. When did he change from not caring one way or the other about the nurse he’d hired to look after Kim’s baby? For that matter, when and how had he come to think of Heidi as his baby? Or what was even more disturbing, Victoria as his?

  “I really do feel like Bluebeard,” he said.

  She shot him a puzzled look. “Why?”

  “It has to do with trust.”

  Victoria picked up the freshly changed baby and retrieved the warmed bottle. As she walked past him toward the rocker, she said, “Trust goes both ways or none. I never did like that fairy tale.”

  While she fed the baby, he smuggled the box in from the van by putting it in a black plastic bag. In the kitchen he eased it from the bag and placed box and all in the warming oven of the stove.

  After a time Victoria lifted her head and sniffed. “Something smells good enough to eat.”

  He grinned at her, wanting things between them to be as they had been yesterday, before he decided to tell her about the divorce and how long ago it had been. He should have kept his mouth shut.

  When she leaned over to put Heidi into the cradle, he took the box from the oven and laid it on the table he’d already set. Placing two cold sodas—one her favorite—beside the glasses, he crossed to the cradle and offered her his arm.

  “Milady, luncheon awaits.”

  She smiled and took his arm, allowing him to lead her to the table where, after seating her, he opened the box with a flourish.

  “Pizza!” she cried. “With all the stuff on it I love.”

  Surprising her with something he knew she liked was his way of telling her he was sorry he’d upset her last night. Did she realize that? He thought she probably did—not much escaped her.

  He waited until they’d both eaten their fill before saying, “I want you to understand that if I could tell you any more than I already have, I would. The agency I work for expects us to keep secrets.”

  Her gaze held his. “What you did tell me was a shock. I had to revise everything I believed to be true about you. Heidi and Kim. I felt you’d lied to me—by omission at least. Kim did want you to have the baby, though. That I know, even if not why.”

  “I felt I had no choice at the time.”

  She nodded. “I’m still mulling over your Bluebeard reference. He killed all those poor wives for merely being curious—what a monster! The last wife finally outsmarted him, though.”

  “Not really, though she did have enough sense to have a backup plan in case she needed help. Her brothers riding to the rescue is what saved her.”

  “I won’t quibble. But why do you feel like Bluebeard ?”

  “Women’s curiosity drove him to his monstrous deeds and I have some empathy for the poor guy. Here I am having to fend off your curiosity like I did Kim’s. One of the reasons she left was her inability to accept the fact I can’t talk about what I do at work. Not at all. Women can’t seem to bridle their curiosity.”

  Victoria held up her hand. “Stop right there. I’ll admit humans, as a race, are curious but women are no more so than men. And I’m not women, I’m me. So, okay, your work is secret—fine. I don’t want to know anything about it. But getting information that isn’t secret out of you makes me feel like a dentist trying to yank out an impacted tooth.”

  He blinked at her. “What information?”

  “Any and all. Your instinct seems to be to hide as much as you can so I have to guess at things.”

  “I’ve told you things about myself.” He sounded defensive, even to himself, but plowed on. “You know about my sister, Karen, and my parents.”

  “That’s ’cause we were trading family info. You hardly ever volunteer any. On the rare occasions that you do drop a crumb, I feel it must have slipped past the barrier accidentally.”

  The rein on his anger slipped and his voice rose. “I don’t know what the hell you expect me to tell you.”

  Heidi began to whimper.

  “You scared her,” Victoria accused, getting up and hurrying to the cradle.

  “Sure, blame Bluebeard,” he muttered, pushing away from the table.

  Holding the baby, she turned to face him. “If you think I’m going to stand on a parapet staring down the road looking to see if anyone’s riding to the rescue, you couldn’t be more wrong. I’m capable of taking care of myself, thank you.”

  “I never doubted that. Anyway, the cabin doesn’t happen to have even one parapet, which I believe is the wall around what you’re not going to stand on.”

  “Whatever,” she snapped. “You know what I mean.”

  Heidi’s fussing grew louder.

  “You’re upsetting her as much as I am,” he said.

  He watched her take a deep breath and knew she was trying to calm herself, and his annoyance ebbed. How could he stay angry at this woman who amused him as much as she irritated him?

  “How about letting me take my turn with my daughter?” He used “my” deliberately.

  Wordlessly she held out the baby to him.

  Seating himself in the rocker, he put the chair into motion, back and forth, back and forth, and began to speak softly to the fussy baby. “Hey, little girl, I don’t mind a real cry if you need something, but this whimpering is out. You’ve got two people here at your beck and call, a dog to protect you and, when you get a bit older, a cat to amuse you.”

  Heidi’s gaze settled on his face and she stopped fussing.

  He went on talking to her. “I’ll bet if old Bluebeard had happened to have a cute little daughter like you to hold. he wouldn’t have wanted to murder all those nosy ladies. He might even have shaved.”

  He heard Victoria giggle but didn’t take his attention from Heidi.

  “So how about a smile for your poor old dad after you made him feel guilty for upsetting you? What kind of a kid are you anyway?—the dog gets a smile, Willa gets one, too, then Victoria. Here’s how it goes, in case you need reminding.” He grinned at her.

  Heidi gave him an endearing, toothless smile.

  “Atta girl,” he said, cuddling her, trying to hide how affected he was.

  He held her, rocking back and forth, until she fell asleep.

  After he laid her in the cradle, he looked around. Victoria was not in the cabin, so he collected Bevins and put him down outside. Victoria sat in one of the Adirondack chairs with Joker at her feet.

  “I’d like to get some pads for these chairs,” she said.

  “I’m with you. Maybe the general store in Hanksville will have some—we’ll be hiking down there the day after tomorrow. Want to take a short walk now? The Sandman came for Miss Heidi.”

  “Willa does have a neat way of expressing herself,” Victoria said, rising. “I’ll miss her.”

  As they strolled along the trail, to his surprise, Steve found himself realizing he’d miss Willa, too. That’s what happened when you let anyone start edging past the barrier. And Victoria was all the way in. What was he going to do about Victoria?

  As if reading his mind, she said, “What
do you intend to do about permanent care for Heidi when we go back to the city?”

  “I haven’t decided,” he admitted.

  He half listened to her mention of caretaker services, his mind fixed on how he might persuade her to stay on. And on. And on...

  Chapter Eleven

  As Victoria was getting ready for bed that evening, she noticed the package from the general store on her dresser and realized what it was. She’d been waiting for the right moment to present Steve with the new pajamas she’d bought for him in Hanksville and had totally forgotten they were there.

  Standing there in her sleep-T, she tried to decide whether to wait until tomorrow or not. There’d been sort of an unspoken agreement that they’d sleep in separate beds tonight, and she didn’t want him to think she was changing the parameters.

  If she’d remembered earlier, she could have snuck upstairs while he was tying Joker out in back and put the new pajamas on his bed for him to find when he went up to the loft. She’d missed that chance but, since he was still sitting in the main room reading his new thriller, she could pop out, drop the pj’s in his lap and zip back into her room. To be polite, he’d probably wear them tonight, which meant just maybe he’d get rid of those grungy old bottoms.

  No need to put on her robe for the quick dash she intended to make. Smiling in anticipation of his surprise, she eased out of her room, watching to see if he’d noticed her. Bevins, on his knee, looked at her, but Steve’s attention remained on his book. She tiptoed across to the chair and was preparing to drape the pajamas over the thriller when he snaked out a hand, grabbed her and flung her onto him.

  The book thudded to the floor and Bevins fled with an indignant yowl as Steve adjusted her until she was sitting in his lap.

  “You are so sneaky,” she complained, tugging at the bottom of her sleep-T. “I’ll bet you knew I was there all the time.”

  “I don’t like to be surprised—but this could be an exception.”

  “The surprise was supposed to be these.” She dug the pajamas out from under her and shook the bottoms at him. “Heidi and I bought them for you in Hanksville.”

  He grinned. “I can’t imagine why.”

  “We felt we had to do something before what seems to be your only pajama bottom completely disintegrates.”

  “You don’t like naked men?”

  “I find that a leading question.” Sitting in his lap wasn’t conducive to clear thinking. Especially with one of his hands caressing her bare thigh.

  “Leading where?” His fingers crept under the bottom edge of her nightshirt.

  “Sir, are you making indecent advances?” she asked.

  “Wouldn’t dream of any such thing, milady. An advance, yes. Indecent, never.” His fingers crept higher.

  She hadn’t meant to slip into a fantasy role but couldn’t help herself. He not only made her feel desire, he also made her feel desirable. A fatal combination.

  “I’ll agree to wear the new bottoms if you’ll promise to wear the top,” he said.

  “But it’ll be too short.”

  “Exactly.”

  She’d walked into that one. Now he was one up. “Don’t you want to get back to your book?” she asked.

  “What do you think?” His hand reached the juncture of her thighs.

  “Given what you’re doing, I’m not too sure I can,” she confessed, tingling all over with increasing need.

  “Good. Because unlike the Adirondack ones, this chair is the right kind.”

  “Um—for what?”

  “It’s a case of showing, not telling.” He kissed her, hot and hard and hungry.

  Victoria gave herself up to pure pleasure. She might not see eye to eye with Steve on everything but they melded perfectly when it came to making love. His caresses turned her insides to lava, hot and steamy.

  He slid down farther in the chair. “Think you can figure out what to do?” His voice, low and husky with need, thrilled through her.

  She managed to get the zipper down on his jeans without permanently disabling him. When his arousal was free of clothes, she stroked him gently until he put an end to it by raising her up until she was poised just right above him.

  Taking him inside her, she gasped his name, overcome with wildly escalating sensations.

  As she enclosed him, he tried to say how wonderful it felt, but he’d gone too high too fast and his mind wouldn’t form words.

  Together on this erotic journey, that’s the way it should be, would always be....

  They clung together afterward until both were in danger of sliding off the chair onto the floor. Reluctantly he let her pull away from him and stand up while he eased back into the chair.

  “All I was really trying to do was give you the new pajamas,” she told him.

  “At the moment I’m willing to believe anything you tell me.” He dug down into the chair and produced the top. “All yours.”

  She took it, leaned down and kissed him lightly. “Good night, Steve.” Her voice was a caress.

  He watched her go into the bedroom and come out again almost immediately holding Bevins. “Look who thought he was going to sleep with me,” she said, heading for the shed, where she shut the kitten in.

  “If I don’t get to, no other male does,” he said.

  She slanted him a look of mock disapproval and disappeared into her room. Amazing how much he enjoyed watching her. Victoria was not one to fuss around; she did everything with an economy of motion he found fascinating. As well as being open, she was stimulating to be with. Refreshing. And fun. He’d forgotten women like her existed. Or maybe he’d never known they did.

  He smiled, reflecting on their lovemaking. Though he’d have liked Victoria to share his bed tonight, he hadn’t expected she would after their disagreement earlier. What happened was a real bonus. Being unplanned made it all the more exciting. Not that every time they made love wasn’t an event in itself.

  Remembering how she’d fled to him when that awesome storm was at its peak warmed him. As independent and capable as she was, she’d needed the comfort of his arms. He found himself fervently wishing their time at the cabin would never end.

  He knew that sooner or later they had to leave, but he didn’t want to think about it.

  Getting up, he grabbed the flashlight, snuffed the lamp and climbed to the loft with his new pajama bottoms.

  When the baby’s first piercing wail woke him, Steve couldn’t believe he’d been to sleep at all. The illuminated dial of his watch told him he was wrong. He yawned, climbed out of bed and flicked on the flashlight. Three o’clock in the morning had never been his favorite time of day. The slight thrumming on the roof told him it was raining again, though not too hard.

  Downstairs, a tousle-haired, sleepy-looking Victoria was just lifting Heidi from the cradle, so he padded into the kitchen to warm a bottle. He watched her change the baby, thinking no matter what she wore or didn’t wear, no matter what time of the day or night, Victoria was a beautiful woman.

  As he sat in the rocker with the warmed bottle, Victoria said, “I’ve always believed breast-feeding is important if a mother can do it, but I also see the advantages of trading off sometimes.”

  She handed him the baby and curled up on the couch, yawning. “You’re wearing the new bottoms,” she said. “Good.”

  “I was afraid not to.”

  “Ha! I doubt that. I’ll never see the day when Steve Henderson is afraid of me.”

  He shifted Heidi to a more comfortable position and made sure she was sucking steadily on the nipple, then frowned at Victoria. “You reneged.”

  She blinked. “Oh, you mean because I’m not wearing the top? I want you to know I’m saving it for a special occasion.”

  “With me?”

  “You’ll just have to wait and see.” She yawned again.

  “Why don’t you go back to bed? I can handle Heidi.”

  “I know that. But I was having a bad dream when she woke me, a dream I was glad to
get out of. I don’t want to risk slipping back into it.”

  “That bad?”

  She nodded. “Renee was trying to reach me in the dream, but I couldn’t find her. I guess the dreams are happening because talking about her to you somehow brought her back to my mind. I’m not a bit psychic.”

  “Just as well. You have enough talents without adding that one. About Renee—do you have any idea at all where she might have gone if she left on her own?”

  “I want to believe she did that. It’s too horrible to think about any other alternative.”

  “Did she ever talk about where she’d like to go if she could?”

  Victoria shrugged. “Sure—Paris, Venice, Jamaica, Finland....”

  “Finland?”

  “She had a crush on one of the male teachers in school who was Finnish.”

  “Did he ever respond, do you think?”

  “Mr. Saari?” Victoria frowned. “I don’t think so, but I really don’t know ’cause she’d moved up to middle school by then and I was still in elementary. But he was at least thirty and Renee was only thirteen.”

  “We both know age doesn’t count with some men.”

  Victoria grimaced. “Do you mind if we talk about something else?”

  “Sorry. Unsolved mysteries intrigue me.”

  “Must be why you work for this secret agency.”

  Now she’d hit on something he didn’t care to discuss. He filed away Saari’s name and decided to go back to what had set them at odds yesterday.

  “Have you come to terms with me not being Heidi’s birth father?” he asked.

  She crossed her arms over her breasts. “I’m not sure. I hate dealing with lies, even when they’re by omission.”

  “Would you have agreed to come and take care of Heidi if you’d known everything at the beginning?”

  “How can I answer that? I’m so attached to her now that I can’t say what I might have done back then.”

  If she hadn’t decided to come with him, they wouldn’t have had this interlude of intimacy, something he’d never forget.

  “You’re one sexy woman,” he said.

  Her blush made him smile.

  Victoria put her hands to her hot face. “The curse of being a redhead,” she muttered.