Once Upon a Crime

by Jimmy Cryans

  Lesley’s birthday was 26 July and I decided to surprise her. I went to her workplace and told her that I would be taking her for lunch and would meet her at 12.30pm. She was a wee bit taken aback by this but I assured her we would have plenty of time. I told her we would have to catch a taxi as I was taking her to a new pub diner that had recently opened along the Kelvin Road. Over on the right-hand side of the pub car park was a 5 series red BMW and I said, ‘Nice motor, eh? That would do you, Lesley.’

  ‘Yes,’ she said, ‘it’s really nice.’

  ‘Well, why don’t you take it for a wee drive?’ I held out the keys. Her face was a picture.

  ‘You’re kidding me, Jim. Are you telling me that you’ve bought that for me?’

  ‘Yes, I have, Lesley. It’s all bought and paid for and it’s yours.’

  And with that I handed her the keys. It was a really nice moment. The BMW wasn’t brand new but it was a nice motor and it did look the part. Lesley was really at a loss to believe that anyone would do something like that for her, but it was worth it and at that time, so was she. She just looked so happy and so beautiful. I still had a nice few quid tucked away from the blag I had done with Ian and the other fella, so I had been able to afford the BMW with plenty of dough left over.

  Lesley did not ask and I did not tell her where the money had come from. As long as I wasn’t bringing any trouble to her door then it was kind of an unwritten rule between us. I had assured Lesley, early doors, that whatever I did to earn it would in no way have any repercussions for her. To her credit she never asked me. She was the first woman I had ever known who did not ask a lot of questions – not just about money, but about things like where I was or who was I going to see. I appreciated this about her and from very early on in our relationship there was a bond of trust between us.

  Lesley was about 5ft 5in with long, blonde hair that framed her oval face in which were set two huge, beautiful hazel eyes. When she smiled her perfect teeth seemed to dazzle. She also possessed a pair of gorgeous legs that went all the way right up to her neck. Lesley was a looker, no doubt about that, but she was also a truly nice person with a wicked sense of humour. She kept her emotions firmly in check and could appear to those who did not know her to be a wee bit cold.

  Lesley’s other sister Kim lived in the flat right above us, which she shared with her son Marc who was about 18 months old. Kim had split from Marc’s dad, Gordon Ross, although they still saw each other from time to time and Gordon would often come up to visit them. I was aware that he was a major player in Glasgow and was a real force to be reckoned with. He was premier league material and had been one of the young Turks who, along with Paul Ferris, Joe ‘Bananas’ Hanlon and Bobby Glover, had carved a place for themselves in Glasgow’s underworld. They were ambitious, intelligent and ruthless.

  Kim invited Lesley and me down to Gordon’s house in Cambuslang one Sunday afternoon. That was my first meeting with him and I was to get to know him very well. I liked Gordon. He was an impressive man, not just in a physical sense but in the way he conducted himself. He was old school, even though he was only 30. He was 6ft tall, powerfully built and very good-looking with black hair and dark sparkling eyes. He had charisma, but it would be very wrong to think of him as being flash in any way. There was just a kind of confidence and assurance about the way he carried himself and a sense of danger.

  Gordon was highly intelligent but I also knew that he could be totally ruthless and would show no mercy to anyone who crossed him. Fuck me, he shot a guy who had bad-mouthed him at a party with both barrels of a sawn-off shotgun. He didn’t kill the guy – just made it very difficult for him to walk properly again. But Gordon did not act the gangster and would take real offence if anyone was to suggest that he was. I found him to be great company and he could be very funny once he got to know you.

  Gordon has often been described as being Tam ‘The Licensee’ McGraw’s right-hand man but neither of us would agree with that. He did spend a lot of time with Tam and they were involved in lots of business together, but Gordon was always his own man and would answer to no one. I was never involved directly in any business with Gordon but would on occasion be asked to look at one or two wee problems he was having with guys who worked for him on his ice cream vans who were stealing from him. These people did not know that Gordon was their employer and that was the way he wanted it kept. So I had to ‘persuade’ these fucking doughnuts that it really was in their best interests not only to call a halt to their scams, but also to repay every penny they had stolen, and do it without them being aware of who they were stealing from. They paid up.

  A lot has been written about Gordon Ross in books and in newspaper articles so I do want to say that I always found him to be a decent guy, a good friend and I miss him to this day. Gordon and another friend named Billy McPhee were killed within a year of each other. Gordon was lured into a trap at the Shieling pub in Shettleston, where the hitman plunged a dagger into Gordon’s chest as he was held by two others. It was the only blow that was struck and it went straight into his heart. Billy McPhee was lured to a Brewers Fayre pub in Baillieston on a Saturday afternoon when a lone hitman entered the bar and, in full view of over a hundred witnesses, plunged a knife into Billy more than 20 times then calmly walked out. Billy had only just survived being shot in the face a couple of months before the fatal hit. Both murders remain unsolved.

  After we had been together for about six weeks, Lesley took me to meet her mum and dad. Margaret and George, it would be fair to say, accepted me cautiously into the fold. Even though I did and said all the right things they knew I was a bit of a lively lad. But they came to see just how much I loved and cared for both Lesley and Cheryl and that my wild days were behind me. I also met Lesley’s brothers, Martin and Keith, and they were smashing guys, still are. Both of them are very successful company executives and are a credit to George and Margaret, who are very proud of their boys and quite rightly so. They are such an honest and caring couple who worked hard all their lives and raised a family with all the values that matter – loyalty, love, honesty and integrity.

  I know they were very disappointed in me when they learned of the robbery that I was imprisoned for when I started writing this book, but I think they understand now why I committed it and they have continued to support me. Their love and loyalty have meant so much to me. I phone them every week and, in a funny way, we have grown even closer. So I would just like to take this opportunity to say a big thank-you to them both. I love you guys.

  I also became very close to Lesley’s sister Kim, who I kind of regard as another little sister. Kim is very attractive, has got real style and turns heads wherever she goes. Some of the best nights out I have ever had have been when Kim was in our company. We both love dance music and a good party, but we also love our family and our kids and they always come first. Kim is just so funny but she can also be a wee bit fiery and is very protective of her boy Marc and her daughter Chloe. I think the world of her.

  All of my family were really taken with Lesley. I think everyone could see just how good she was for me and it was obvious to everyone that we were very much in love. My ma was happier than I had ever seen her and I know she was just so relieved to see me settling down at last.

  I continued to do various bits of ‘work’ but now I was working alone as I’d had a very serious fall-out with Ian. I was quite happy, although I was limited in what I was able to tackle. The upside was my security was very tight as absolutely no one was ever aware of what I was up to and this included Lesley. I kept all the work I was doing very low-key and was never flash with money. To all outward appearances we lived a very normal life. This was reinforced by the fact that I also had some legitimate businesses on the go.

  I set up and ran a small business from home selling watches, lighters and jewellery. I would drive to Manchester and Birmingham and buy in bulk from jewellery wholesalers. Life was good and around this time I was paid what is probably the best compliment I h
ave ever got. My brother Hughie said, ‘I want to tell you something, Jim. I have never known of anyone to turn their life around the way you have since you met Lesley. We are all so proud of you and I just wanted you to know that.’ Hughie had no idea just how much those words meant and I was bursting with pride, though I must give a lot of the credit for achieving my goal to Lesley.

  It was also around this time that I renewed a friendship with an old pal of mine named John Turner. I had met John some years previously when we didn’t get to know each other too well but I was to become as close to John as I have ever been to anyone. No one – and I mean no one – has been more loyal to me over the years than John Turner. He continues to be there for me, nothing is too much trouble for him and I owe him a debt of gratitude that would take me a lifetime to pay. But John would just tell me to ‘shut up’ and ‘don’t be silly’ and ‘that’s what friends are for’. He is a very special guy and I am fortunate that he welcomed me into his home.

  I am also lucky enough to have become friends with his beautiful and absolutely terrific wife, Josie. John can be a very funny guy with a couple of drinks in him but Josie always knows when he has had enough and really she is, as most women are, the rock on which a happy home is built. For me, John and Josie represent all that is good about being married. They have been together now for almost 30 years and have raised three stunning and adorable daughters who are also my friends and just like my nieces. I just cannot speak highly enough of every one of them. And it is not just the practical things that John does for me. He is also there to give me advice and I always listen to what he has to say because he is almost without fail on the money. Over the years, there have been many times when I have been thankful for John’s wise words.

  I am also good pals with his dad, John Turner Sr, who is a real character and one of my heroes. Fuck me, this guy has done it all. An ex-paratrooper, he has been all over the world, lived in the USA for years and is still going strong. Oh, and he bears more than a passing resemblance to country singer Merle Haggard. Mrs Turner is one fine lady too – all the Turners are very special people.

  John runs his own successful car-spraying business and, along with John Sr, restores cars. The two of them are brilliant at what they do so if anybody out there needs a bit of work done on their motor I strongly recommend they give Turners Autospray in East Kilbride a bell. You will not be disappointed and it will save you a nice few quid as John’s rates are very reasonable.

  Chapter Thirty-three

  In 1998 I had a few grand put by from a bit of ‘work’ I had done and decided to have a holiday at EuroDisney near Paris. Lesley and me took Cheryl and Kim and Gordon Ross’s boy, young Marc. This was a real family holiday.

  We also drove into Paris itself and I spent the day, my 45th birthday, standing under the Eiffel Tower with Lesley, Cheryl and wee Marc. That holiday was the best I have ever had and it will remain long in my memory, but it was over all too soon and before we knew it we were back in East Kilbride.

  I really was making an effort to be as straight as I could be, as Lesley would really be much happier if every penny I brought in had been earned honestly. I knew it would be very hard to turn away from what I knew best, but I did try and I was kind of enjoying the novelty of earning an honest crust. I had never been happier and everything just seemed to be in place. I know Lesley was also happier during this period. These were the days of wine and roses and they just seemed to get better.

  Ma was so happy for me and I was now spending quality time with her. I would take her shopping every Thursday but there was hardly a day went by when I wouldn’t be up at her house. I guess I was trying to make up for all the years of worry I had caused her. Ma loved watching the snooker on TV and her favourite player was Jimmy White, so as a surprise I got tickets to an exhibition match he was doing on the campus of Stirling University. I had also got a copy of Jimmy’s autobiography and arranged for Jimmy to meet her at the end when he signed the book and had a wee chat. She was totally made up and to cap it off we stopped at a nice wee fish and chip shop on the way home. I later organised another surprise – tickets to see her favourite singer, Shirley Bassey. We again had fish and chips on the way home – this was becoming a bit of a ritual with the pair of us. Those were great nights and I have them well secured in my memory bank.

  By 2000 I had been with Lesley for almost seven years, the longest period I had spent with any woman. It was also the longest I’d not had any trouble with the law and I don’t think you have to be a genius to work out the connection. Lesley had been good to me and good for me and I repaid her faith in me by being the best partner I could.

  It may seem that I lived an exciting life of bright lights and glamour, but that was never the case. I was always happy to be at home with Lesley and Cheryl and have my family close by. I loved to go out clubbing but that was only for weekends and really I was more than content to be at home with the ones I love. The family unit is the most important thing for me and in many ways I am a bit of an old traditionalist.

  Why then did I risk losing that by earning my living from committing serious offences? It’s a good question and not easy to answer. At that time the rewards outweighed the risks. It was also something I took very seriously and I must say that I enjoyed my ‘work’. I was aware that changes were occurring in my thinking and I was struggling to understand what was going on inside. This wasn’t something that caused me any sleepless nights but I was conscious of a stirring that perhaps there was another way. I was always at risk of losing everything whenever I went out on a bit of ‘work’, but that was as far as I was able to go at this point and I had not given any thought to the wider implications. I was not deliberately intending to cause any grief to those I loved but I now recognise that ultimately my attitude and reasoning were deeply flawed and selfish. Morally, I really did not have a leg to stand on.

  As I write this I can see that what I was going through was, for the first time in my life, being frightened of losing what I had got. Lesley was my soul-mate and the sun would rise and set with her. She represented everything that was good about a woman you loved and shared your life with.

  That same year my brother Hughie and his partner Christine decided to tie the knot after being together for almost 20 years. As I stated earlier, their wedding was the best I have ever been to and everything just went so well. It was a beautiful summer’s day in July and all of the family from far and wide were present. Christine looked beautiful and Hughie just looked so proud and I couldn’t have been happier for them.

  I had all but given up doing robberies but I had moved on to different types of earners. Let me just say this – I learned that computers could be a very useful tool and I used them to maximum advantage. It is amazing what you can find out and I would spend hours researching various schemes. I was able to earn quite a few quid from this. That is not to say that everything I touched was dodgy as I was able to earn a bit of money legitimately, but in those early days the internet was open to abuse and there were people earning fortunes from it. Fraud took off in a really big way. And if you were smart enough and really knew your way around the internet then it was almost impossible to have your collar felt.

  On the whole things were coming along quite nicely, but one or two clouds were beginning to appear on the horizon. Ma’s health was deteriorating and she was no longer able to get around in the same way. I was spending practically all my spare time with her and would either do all her shopping or, if she was able, take her to the supermarket. Ma was finding all this very hard to cope with as she had always been so independent all her life. It wasn’t that she did not appreciate everything the family did for her, it was just that she hated to feel that she was a burden. I would sit with her and explain that not only was she not a burden, but that I loved looking after her and that I was only doing for her what she had done for me all my life. I also used to take her homemade soup and she loved it when I made mince and tatties, but her favourite was a fish supper from
the Greenhills chippie with a buttered roll. I would make a lovely cup of tea and we would sit and gab away for hours.

  Many people have commented to me on how well I looked after Ma and how good I was to her, but I would say to them that I was only doing what any good son would do for his mother. She had always been there for me and her love was totally unconditional. That is not to say that we did not have some right good arguments. The rest of the family used to say that me and Ma were like an old married couple and they christened us Bert and Daisy.

  I used my time with Ma to ask all the questions that I might never have the chance to ask again. Questions about her life as a child growing up in the poverty-ravaged east end of Glasgow, about her first boyfriends and about death. I even wanted to know exactly what kind of funeral she wanted. Because we’d had these kinds of talks, that made it easier when she did go. I learned so much from talking to Ma during this time. But I was aware that her health was not good and I had to face the fact that she would eventually succumb to her illness. I would need to find the strength to face the inevitable while being there for her and I would have to take the lead and be strong for all the family.

  It was now that I started to give some really serious thought about walking away from my life of crime for good. I was terrified that my ma would die when I was in jail and that I would not be there for her at the end. The thought of that happening used to give me nightmares and I would wake up, or be woken up by Lesley, bathed in a cold sweat and with tears in my eyes. I had already buried my da Hughie while in chains and I did not want to repeat that experience with Ma. Financially, a decision to go straight would hit us quite hard but the alternative just didn’t bear thinking about. I was starting to take stock, but I knew it would only be a matter of time before I would have to stop.