by Nicki Day
Damn it. What the hell was she doing? Hadn’t she learned the hard way that she was putty in Michael Barnett’s hands?
This isn’t going to end well, Vicky.
Chapter Eight
Michael held the door open for her and waited for her to step out into the small courtyard. Snow covered the ground from the storm they’d had the day before. It was obvious from the fresh tracks they were making that no one, not even an animal, had walked across the fresh snow.
He shut the door and walked down the two concrete steps that led to where benches sat in a circular pattern. In the summer there would be a mound of bright flowers that made a mosaic in the shape a dove flying in front of the sun. The botanic art that their small city hall planted every year was barely visible except for the slight hump underneath the white blanket of cold powder.
She sat on one of the wooden benches with her hands tucked neatly in her pockets just like she had earlier that day when he’d seen her walking. Initially he’d wanted to sit next to her, and feel her closeness, but he didn’t want to push things. Instead he chose a bench that sat to her right and turned sideways to see her better. She didn’t look up at him. Instead she stared mindlessly at the pile of snow lying where the flowers once stood.
They’d only been outside for seconds but it may have well been hours. The silence between them was all but deafening. He needed to say something and cure this awkwardness between them. Even if it was for no other reason than easing his own conscience.
“Vicky, I owe you an apology,” he began.
“Michael, it was a long time ago. We were both kids.”
“I know, but that doesn’t make how I handled things any better. My father raised me to be a man, not run when things got…complicated.”
She shook her head. “You really don’t have to do this.”
“Yes, I do,” he argued. “You were my everything back then. Next to being a Marine, nothing in the world was more important to me than you. I would’ve never hurt you in a million years.”
“I know that.”
“But I did.”
“Michael—”
“No. Please, let me finish.”
She looked over at him and nodded. “Okay.”
“I was eighteen years old. We’d both just barely graduated. When I heard you were pregnant, or that you thought you were… I freaked. I kept thinking about going off to the Corps and how it would affect me. I didn’t think how it was going to affect you.”
“But I wasn’t pregnant. Remember? False alarm.”
“Yeah, but I didn’t know that at first. And I treated you horribly. Much worse than you ever deserved.”
“You were scared.” She shrugged with her response. “We both were.”
“Exactly. I told you that first night you gave yourself to me that I would never hurt you. And that’s exactly what I did.”
“Yeah well, you tried to make it right. You came back.”
“But it was too late,” he added. “You’d already been so hurt by the shitty things I’d said to you that you wouldn’t listen.”
She turned to him then. Her lips parted softly with a sigh and then she said, “I was stupid. I felt betrayed and acted like a child.”
“I think I was worse. I should have been there for you. I should have told you that I would be there for you and our child. Anything would have been better than blaming you for forgetting to take your pill and acting like you had tried to trap me. I acted like a horrible jackass.”
She smiled at him. “Yeah, you kind of were. But, you did try to make it right and I wouldn’t listen.”
“It shouldn’t have gotten to that point.”
“Well, there was no baby. I guess one of those things that teenagers go through.”
“Maybe, but I have to say… as crazy as it sounds, there isn’t a day that goes by that I didn’t regret how I treated you.”
“Michael. It really is okay. It happened a long time ago. So much time has passed. We’re different people now. I’ve grown up. You’ve grown up. Things change. I think we’re both adult enough that we can leave what happened between us in the past. Don’t you?”
“Maybe. I guess. I want you to know that I am sorry though.”
“So am I.”
Their eyes locked on one another’s as they offered up apologies that were thirteen years in the making. The moonlight shone down on her lips, causing them to glisten with whatever she was wearing on them. Her cute little button nose looked red and cold. He knew he should offer to take her back inside, yet nothing could make him do it. He wanted to be alone with her. No matter how wrong it may be. He tried reminding himself that she was a married woman. It would appear that even the high moral values taught to him in the Corps were lost on him in that moment.
“I forgot how beautiful this place could be during winter time,” she said, breaking the silence between them.
“Yeah.” He looked around at the evergreen trees that were still dusted with snow. “It certainly is a different place. I always seem to forget just how different until I step foot back in town. Every time it surprises me.”
“I know what you mean.” Shaking her head, she added, “Wow. I can’t believe I’ve stayed away all this time.”
“How long has it been?”
“Since I left for college.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah. I never came back after that…summer.”
He didn’t miss how her voice trailed off into an almost different time and place. He could still remember it like it was yesterday. He wondered if it was the same for her.
“It took me a few years myself. I try to make it back every so often, though.”
“Yeah, well I figured if I didn’t come back this year dear old Connie would’ve come to Denver to kidnap me.”
Michael chuckled. “Pretty persistent, huh?”
“Ever since my divorce she’s been pretty paranoid. Constantly fussing and worrying. You know how moms can be.”
He nodded. “You’ve met mine so you know I understand that quite well.”
He did his best to mask his surprise that she was divorced. He’d heard she had been married and had just assumed she still was. Whatever kind of idiot she had been married to he obviously didn’t know a good thing when he saw it. There was no way he would ever let someone like Vicky go. Then he reminded himself, that he’d done that very thing.
“I always liked your mom.”
“She always liked you too.”
She smiled at him then. Not the polite Vicky Browning smile, but the sincere one. The smile that he knew came from a special place in her heart.
“Brr.” She brought her hands out of her pocket and rubbed them together. “It sure is cold out here. I thought it got bad in Denver.”
“We’re higher up on the Western slope. Bound to be a little colder. Here, let me help.” He got up from where he sat and came over to her bench. Sitting down beside her he wrapped her hands up in his and blew gently before rubbing them together. “How’s that?”
“Better. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” He smiled at her.
She looked so beautiful. Her dark curly hair fell around her face, framing it to perfection like a model who had spent hours in front of the mirror. He wanted so badly to slide some of those ringlets in between his fingertips and pull her closer. Despite his needs, he remained frozen in place, unwilling to do too much and scare her away.
They stared at one another. He looked into her hypnotic green eyes while she blinked softly while returning his gaze.
“You are still so beautiful.” The words slipped out, betraying his inner thoughts.
She sighed softly and parted her lips just barely. “Michael.”
Her mouth, those lips. Damn but they were driving him wild. Could it be that he’d forgotten how she tasted? How good she smelled? How sweet her kiss could be?
He didn’t want to wait to find out a moment longer. Now that she was here, he damn sure wa
s going to take a chance.
Leaning in, he dipped his head down and with his hands still holding hers he closed his eyes and was ready to kiss her.
“Mike? Hey… you out here?”
What the ever loving… he turned to see his brother standing on the small stoop, which led out from the banquet room. Jack. He should have known.
“Oh… hey. I didn’t mean to interrupt.” Jack waved at Vicky. “Hi Vicky. Good to see you again.”
She smiled, and looked down. He didn’t miss the blush that spread across her face. If he wasn’t so close to church he might have leapt across the courtyard and killed his brother. He always had a knack for walking in on him and Vicky when they were kids, but in their thirties? Come on!
“Can I help you with something, big brother?” He offered up his best smile which said nothing short of ‘you will pay for this later’.
“Uhh…yeah, well Ma wanted me to come and find you. Said she needed your help with something.”
“Tell her I’ll be right there.”
“Sure thing. Good seeing you again, Vicky.”
“You too, Jack.” She waved at him before he stepped inside.
“I’m sorry about that.”
She stood up. “Oh don’t be silly. Your mom needs your help. I’m sure my mom could use some help with the thousands of pies she baked too.”
Damn it.
He could see her closing off. For a minute he had her. She was right where he wanted her, sweet and open to him. Now after his brother’s less than perfect timing he could see her walls going up again just like they had been last night in the park.
“Vicky.” He grabbed her hand before she walked away.
“Yes?”
“Can I see you later?”
“I don’t know, Michael.”
“Please?”
She looked around, as if considering his request. Then she surprised him by turning back with a question. “When?”
“I don’t know. Maybe tonight? After the dinner when everyone has gone home?”
“I suppose I could go out for a walk later. I could meet you in the park. By the tree?”
“I’d like that very much.” He smiled at her.
“Well, we better get back inside.”
“Yeah.”
She led the way for the both of them. He walked behind her and opened the door for her to walk inside. She turned back to face him and offered a smile before retreating to the other side of the room where her mother stood.
He watched her for a moment, taking in her every movement. There was a time he thought he might never see her again. Now that she was so close he felt a jolt of something new and exciting.
It was a feeling he hadn’t experienced in thirteen years. And he couldn’t wait to see her later that night.
Chapter Nine
Vicky spent most of the dinner with her mother while she talked her up to anyone who would listen. For the most part everyone had been nice and not too nosy with her—although not too nosy for Dove Creek didn’t mean the same as it did for most other people. Inherently, the residents of Dove Creek couldn’t help but be a little curious about the girl who stayed away for so long.
She didn’t mind it too much. That Clarice woman sure had been a hoot and a half. She had more one liners and she had to catch herself more than once from spewing food from her mouth while laughing.
Despite keeping busy with conversation and helping out her mother, her thoughts never went too far from Michael. That moment they’d shared in the courtyard a couple of hours earlier replayed in her mind. While she couldn’t be sure, she had a pretty strong feeling that he had been about to kiss her before Jack interrupted them.
Lord knew that Jack Jr. had interrupted them more than once in their younger days. Now as she waited for the time on the clock to tick by, she wondered why he wanted to see her later. A part of her felt like she knew, but the woman who had been cheated on by her husband doubted herself.
As she and her mother packed up the empty pie dishes and assisted with clean up, she couldn’t help but allow her eyes to wander the room to see if he was still there. Twice earlier she’d caught him staring at her from across the room. She only wished she knew what he’d been thinking of when she did catch him.
His apology earlier had been sweet, even though unnecessary. She’d long since forgiven him for the things that he’d said that night. It wasn’t as if she’d handled the situation any better once he tried to make things right between them. They’d been kids. Foolish, irresponsible and reckless kids.
Scanning the room she no longer saw him across the span of people. Most of Dove Creek had already left and only a few had stayed behind to help with cleanup. She’d foolishly forgotten to ask Michael what time she should meet him. Her cheeks were flushed as giddiness filled her, making her feel like a school girl all over again.
Get a hold of yourself, Vicky.
She silently chided herself. Even though her flame for Michael had been hotter than with anyone ever before, she couldn’t afford to get too caught up in things. She remembered all too well the heartache that she’d felt all those years ago.
“You two go on ahead. I’m going to finish up a few things and lock up. Whatever isn’t done, I’ll come back tomorrow morning to clean up,” Clarice offered.
“Are you sure?” Connie asked. “We don’t mind staying.”
She couldn’t help but smile at her mother. It was obvious she was exhausted from waking up early, baking all day and doing so much for this dinner. But it was typical of her selfless nature that Connie Browning would stay all night to help out if someone else needed a hand.
“I’m positive,” Clarice insisted. “Besides if I know you, you’ll be up early tomorrow morning anyway. You need your rest. I’ve always been more of a night owl anyway.”
“You’re sure?” Connie asked again.
“Yes, I’m sure. Now go on. You’ve got your baby girl here.”
“Come on, Mom. Clarice is right. You’ve been up since the crack of dawn baking. I know you’re tired. I can tell.”
“Oh, alright. But only if you call me in the morning if you need any help,” Connie replied.
“I promise. Now go on. We’ve got this. You’ve done enough already.”
“Thank you, Clarice.” Connie hugged her goodbye.
After the round robin game of hugs and waving goodbye, she and her mom buttoned up their coats to head back out and brave the cold winter night. With their house being only two blocks from town hall, it made the walk home short and not too cold. Not that she was feeling much of it anyway. Just the memory of Michael sitting close to her warmed her in a way that she hadn’t felt in a very long time.
Shortly after stepping inside the house, she had helped her mom soak the pie dishes so they’d be ready for washing in the morning. Just as she had suspected her mom was dead tired and ready to head to bed only minutes after they returned home.
“I’m going to head to bed, honey. You coming up soon?” Connie asked.
“Actually, I think I might stay up for a while. Maybe even talk a walk through the park.”
“The park? At this hour?” Connie asked with worry.
“I’ll be fine, Mom. I haven’t been back home for a long time. I’d forgotten how much I liked our city tree when it was all lit up. I won’t be long.”
“Hmm…okay. Don’t stay out too long though. It’s cold out there tonight and it’s not supposed to be warming up anytime soon.”
“Yes, Mother.” She grinned and kissed her mother goodnight.
She waited until her mom had gone into her bedroom and had closed the door before she made her way to the kitchen. Just before putting on her coat she had the idea to make some hot cocoa. It might have been silly, but she remembered many winter nights when she would bring some out and her and Michael would sit in the park or go for a walk with their mugs in hand.
As she waited for the water to warm on the stove, she hoped she wasn’t being too foolish b
y bringing the hot beverages. It might seem like she was trying to relive some of the old days. Truthfully, maybe she was. She wasn’t exactly sure what she was expecting from tonight. All she knew was that for the first time in a very long time she felt excited about going to see a man.
In a matter of minutes she was on her way out the door, all buttoned up with two covered mugs in her hands. She had an extra kick in her step as she made her way down the sidewalk, across the road and over to the park. The street lights illuminated portions of the park and from what she could tell Michael wasn’t there yet.
As she stepped onto the snow covered grass she couldn’t feel the coldness wrap around her ankles. The winter wind didn’t even give her a chill. And she didn’t believe it to be the hot cocoa that seemed to be suddenly giving her warmth.
She crossed the open area in front of the lit up tree and sat on one of the many wood benches that surrounded it. While setting the mugs down beside her she saw a shadow stretch across the blanket of snow. She looked up and saw Michael standing before her with his hands in his pockets.
“Hi,” he said with a grin.
“Hi.” She smiled wide.
Chapter Ten
He looked down at her; her smile was wide and her eyes actually looked happy. It was a nice sight. Their first two meetings he’d only seen hesitation staring back at him. Now he saw a glimmer of the old Vicky he used to know.
“I wasn’t sure what time you were coming by,” he said.
“Sorry, I guess I never said. We stayed late to help clean up a little. I hope you weren’t waiting long.”
“It’s okay.” He sat down on the bench next to the mugs. “You were worth the wait.”
“I brought hot cocoa.” She picked up one of the mugs and removed the plastic lid.
“Thank you.” He took a sip. “It reminds me of a long time ago. Do you remember? You used to make some for us and we’d—”
“I remember,” she interrupted him. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to cut you off.”
“It’s okay. Thank you though. It is really very sweet.”