Messy and Shattered

by Mercy Cortez

  Chapter Twenty-Three - Jethro

  I watched the monitor and saw his blip flash, over and over. He was moving. Operatives had no idea we had a trace on them. We inject an RFID chip into their arm during the mandatory physical prior to joining, alongside the expected slew of immunisations for international jobs. It had been one of my problems when I went under cover. One of many. Draco seemed to be at a motel and I wasn't aware of the reasoning behind it. He may have the girl, he may not, but I needed to find out. That girl had to be at The Lights next week. We had managed to get some major investors in the sex trafficking industry to attend and we just had to hope one would want our gem. She had looked rather attractive on our background check; in fact, she had a hint of Gianna in her. I haven't had a day go by where I didn't think of Gianna, and I never will. I was told to see a shrink, but unless I’m forced to, I don't think I’ll talk about that incident – about her – ever again.

  I loved my work, loved being the 'good guy.' I really liked Draco; I had worked with him the past five years. He had a good head on his shoulders but I knew that this 'Aimee' wasn't like the others. He was losing it. I could see it in his eyes and I had a bad feeling that whatever he was in that motel for had something to do with the look in his eye when we met last. I remember when Draco first took this case. He had just come off a three year stint in a gang. He had to become a coke addict and dabbled in heroin to keep his cover, he looked a wreck every time I saw him but he pulled through and he got the job done and helped us stop billions of dollars’ worth of drugs from coming into the US. He never quivered, he did his job and he did it well. But we all have a breaking point.

  I looked at the map, taking note of the motel he was in and grabbing my keys. Looks like I was doing retrieval today.

  Chapter Twenty-Four - Aimee

  I stared into his back while he sat on the end of the bed. I needed to ask questions, I didn't understand. I looked at the cuffs, he had to let me out for one thing.

  "Draco, I need to use the toilet...I need my hands for that" I said it with a little urgency for effect and he grunted as he went to get up.

  “If you try anything, I will hurt you so bad, you’ll beg me to take you back to Rahul. Understood?”

  He stared right into my eyes as he said it and although I wasn’t scared of Draco, he had a way about him that made you respect his threat.

  I just nodded and he pulled my wrist and dragged the bottom drawer of the cabinet open, pulling out the key to my handcuffs and unlocking them. I watched as the cuff came loose and just like in every bad cop movie I rubbed my wrist.

  I got up and he grabbed my hand. He gently brushed my knuckles and my breath struck a little in my throat.

  “Your bruises are healing, you’re looking good.” I felt my heart leap, but he didn’t need to know that.

  “Thanks. I’d look better if I was at home with my sister, but still, glad you can appreciate my bruised and damaged look. I have been working extra hard on it for you.”

  I dragged my hand away from his and scowled at him while he released a throaty laugh. I got to the bathroom door and looked back.

  “By the way, you don’t look so bad yourself,” and I shut the door. I had a smile on my face until I looked in the mirror. All this time, I hadn’t been able to see myself. I hadn’t really thought about it, but maybe I was blocking it out. I looked over my cheeks and nose, down my body. My eyes were a little bloodshot and the skin around them had a splash of yellow mixed with purple bruises; my nose had a gash across the bridge and my cheek bone bore a bruise that was a mix of grey and yellow. If this was me healing, I must have looked a wreck before. I looked at my hair, I hadn’t had it washed since that night with Rahul and it looked filthy, I pinched my bottom lip with my middle finger and thumb, remembering Draco inside my mouth. I squirmed at the thought, but a part of me, the part that controlled my mouth smiled at my reflection and I knew that part should leave me be. I poked my head out the door and announced that I was going to shower, to which I expected some concern, but he just mumbled. The shower was disgusting, but considering the fact that I hadn’t been in a shower for approximately two weeks, I really had no right to question it. I removed the shirt he had placed on me and the mirror betrayed me yet again and showed my scared nipple in all its glory, I felt tears in my eyes but I held them back. I would be okay. I stepped into the shower and turned the water on. The water hitting my body felt like heaven, and I found a tiny spec of happiness in that shower. I reached my arm up to wash my hair but my shoulder blade ached sharp and I withdrew, I tried again but the pain was worse and so I resigned to the fact my hair would stay dirty, until I heard the door to the bathroom creak.

  “I had to check on you, can’t have you climbing out the window or anything.”

  “The window has solid bars on it, I already looked” I smiled as I turned off the shower, showing I wasn’t serious, although the window did have bars on it.

  “You aren’t clean; you didn’t wash your hair. Why did you shut the shower off?” his hair was always the same length, scruffy and long on top, the blonde clean and perfect, he had a little stubble and it made him look especially sexy.

  “I couldn’t reach; it hurts to stretch that way. Can you hand me a towel?” He went to grab a towel and then turned back to me.

  “Turn it back on.” He removed the towel that was wrapped around his waist and I felt my jaw drop, I had never seen him completely naked before, he had soft curls on his chest that made me want to run my hands across his pecks, he had a beautiful ‘v’ framing his length, I felt myself blush and the perfection of his laugh filled the bathroom.

  “Eyes on my face, perv,” he chuckled, and hopped into the shower, I turned it on. This shower really wasn’t roomy enough for two, making our bodies touch and our lips an inch apart. His eyes focused on my throat as I swallowed down my nervousness.

  “Turn around.”

  “Why?” I didn’t trust him at all.

  “How about… because I said so?” He started to pull me around.

  “I don’t entirely trust you.”

  “Good, you’d be a fool to trust me. But just because you shouldn’t trust me, doesn’t mean you don’t need me. Now turn around or I will make you, sweet-cheeks.” His smile warmed his entire face and I turned slowly, my arse against him, he pushed his hands from my shoulders, across the arch in my back and rested both palms on my arse, I breathed loudly through the water and he squeezed and then pushed his hands away and they were suddenly in my hair.

  “I will wash your hair; it is becoming quite the routine.” He rolled his hands into my scalp and less gentle than he had before, I wanted to moan and push my head into his hands but I refrained, I saw his reflection in the shower glass, he seemed to be concentrating hard. He reached for the shampoo and squirted it into his palm, bringing it to my hair and massaging it into my scalp. A little moan escaped my lips, and I saw a dash of a smile showing his perfect white teeth, he rinsed the shampoo away and pulled me around so I faced him.

  He leaned his body so close against mine my nipples were on his chest when the shower stopped.

  “All clean,” he said, as he leant back he cupped my jaw and raised my head into his line of sight, his thumb brushed over my bottom lip and he pulled it gently.

  I felt an impulse something in me that needed a release, his lips were wet and dripping, they looked so welcoming. I suddenly leaned into him and felt his wet lips press against mine, his hands stroked my wet locks as he pulled me even closer, he moaned into my mouth while his tongue explored me. My eyes shut hard, I felt alive, in control, I chose this. I sucked onto his tongue when a vision of a girl clouded through my mind. She had light red hair and green eyes. She was crying, her blood was on the ground, in a grassy English meadow, her tears spilling and suddenly my eyes shot open and I pulled my lips from him and breathed one single word.

  “Erin.”

  He pushed me away a little and cradled my face.

  "You won't ever
understand why I did it will you?" He said it with such sadness, my heart almost wept.

  "That's where you're wrong; I know exactly why you did it. The problem is... I'm glad. I'm glad she is dead and that is a hard pill to swallow." I hadn't realised I was crying until his thumb rubbed a tear away on my cheek. He kissed me lightly on the lips. I didn't know why we had kissed, why we were here, or what was coming but for some stupid reason, knowing I had Draco made it all feel that little bit safer. I was comforted by a murderer. I was honest. I knew why he had killed her. But that didn’t make it okay.

  We walked out of the bathroom and Draco sat naked on the bed, his cheeky little smile making his feeling contagious.

  "Draco, what are we doing here? I know I shouldn't ask, but where is Rahul?" I asked quietly awaiting an onslaught.

  He sighed deeply "Aimee, I had to get out of there. God, I had to stop all this..." He pushed his hand through his wet thick blond hair and grimaced at memories that flashed through his mind.

  "Two years. I had been with Rahul for two years. I ... I've seen a lot of things Aimee, in my life, I've seen more than most, but nothing, absolutely nothing compared to Rahul. He was... Is a psychopath, he hurt women so badly it shocked me. I wish I could tell you everything, but I have to protect you until I decide what to do. We have one more night here and then we have to go; Rahul will find us" I observed him and nodded slowly, my mind digesting all he had said.

  "Why now, though? Why leave now? Why not before? Why not before you... before my sister?" I held in any hurt in my voice.

  "Aimee, I thought I could do it. I thought I could just think of the bigger picture and just do it, just sell you. Even when I first saw you I had guilt, guilt that I wasn't expecting. I don't know what has happened. I am not who you think I am and for some goddamn reason I just want to pick you up, throw you over my shoulder and run away with you. Now sleep, we have a big day coming."

  I got into the double bed without any clothes on, as I only had an old shirt, anyway. Draco got up and went to throw some boxers on and then sat in the chair opposite the bed; watching me try to sleep. I thought about his words, running away with him and I rolled and fidgeted as sleep refused to take me. I looked over at Draco, who was also wide awake. I did something that I had been dying to do but had kept my betraying mind at bay. I pulled the duvet over and looked at him as I tapped my palm on the mattress.

  "Join me?"

  He smiled as he walked slowly to the bed, fell onto the mattress and pulled my waist against him, where he held me as I finally found sleep, where I didn't have a nightmare of Rahul or of Erin but a dream of a future. Something I hadn't even given any thought.

  Chapter Twenty-Five - Rahul

  Today Draco had promised me he would do the final task. He was going to fuck our little Aimee. I felt a growl in my throat as I thought about it. I made my way to the monitors. I had been out late and when I came back I just slept. I was finally in the dusty room with the LCD monitors. I searched each monitor with my eyes, flicking between them. Nothing. No one. My heart rate increased. Where the fuck is she? I called Draco to no answer. I searched his room and noticed his wardrobe open and empty.

  "You fucking moron." He had taken her, 'saved' her. He was stupid; she would run at the first chance. If she didn't, I would find them and I would make him watch while I hurt her so badly it wouldn’t ever leave his mind.

  I went outside The Shell, I walked over to my motorbike and grinned when I noticed the slashed tyres, "Like that will stop me."

  I pulled out my mobile phone and dialed.

  "It’s Rahul... Yes... A male, Austin Draco and a female companion... No, I want them both dead. Slowly..."

  Chapter Twenty-Six – Draco and Aimee

  I woke up with a layer of brunette hair feathering my face. I could smell the shampoo I had massaged into it the night before, jasmine and vanilla. I held her body close to mine and heard her low breathing meaning she was still asleep. I had really fucked up; broken every rule in the damn book and for what? I guess for her but I don’t understand why I even cared, if someone tried to claw me away from her I would have no issue in butchering them. She was important, and maybe I couldn’t entirely acknowledge what feelings I had for her, but I knew that holding her in this bed, in this shitty motel was the happiest I had felt since I was a little kid.

  I remember only a little from my childhood. Flashes of my mother and tiny specs of my father, but they tell me I use it to block it all out. They told me what happened and yet to this day I haven’t fully confronted it; I had a nagging thought in my head telling me that Aimee had the same eyes, the same smile as her, as my mother but then I guess it was just wishful thinking.

  I don’t ever want to remember it, any of it. I held her as close as I could and decided to rest my eyes a little longer.

  **

  I felt his hands grasp my stomach lifting me from a dream; a dream similar to reality with Zedd - Clarity playing in the background. Draco had kissed down my spine in my dream to wake me up. His lips had been so soft. I had turned around and felt him run his fingers through my hair. We were alone here, and I was…Happy…

  I woke to a feeling of emptiness and, as always, shame and guilt for thinking of this man in any way but hatred. I turned my body around and watched his eyelids flicker in his sleep. My hands were untied, I was free.

  I eyed the door a meter away from me and back to Draco. He was out like a light. He wouldn’t wake now and I had one chance to run, to get away to finally be free of all of this and to go home. Home didn’t hold much promise to me, but it was all I knew, and even if I had nothing to return to, it would be over. I pushed my legs over the side of the bed and glanced back at Draco and watched as his bare chest rose and fell. I held my heart locket that had never left my neck. Even after Rahul screamed at Draco for letting me have it, he had never insisted I remove it. Staring at Draco sleeping soundly, safely, innocently, and I almost wanted to kiss him goodbye, and a very strange part of me wanted to thank him, which made me angry enough to forget the kiss. I wasn’t grateful to him, if it wasn’t for him I would be at home with Erin. My mind stopped blank as it posed one sick and disturbing statement to me… then you would never have met him. It wasn’t in a gleeful tone in my head, it was sad and mournful of the loss I would have had never having known this man. Loss? What a stupid word for what I have faced. I looked at the door and whispered to Draco as I stood.

  “I am a product. I am nothing.” Tears spilled on my cheeks and I got annoyed that they were there. I was naked, as I had been in most of my captivity, and I no longer cared who saw because modesty was a privilege when you were taken by men like these. I tiptoed to the wooden door and heard his breathing stay low as I reached the door handle. I was half expecting it to be locked, expecting to find out why this idea was so stupid, that he would have thought better not to allow me this chance to run, but instead I turned the handle and felt as a soft breeze entered the room. My heart stopped dead. Then I heard it.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven – Draco

  It is so dark in here; Mummy was silly to play hide and seek now. It is bath time now and that means I won’t get to have a bath. Silly Mummy. I think I hear the door. It’s so cramped in here, I should have hidden better. She said to hide and be real quiet and so I did. I can peak through the little openings in the closet door. I can see Mummy, she won’t find me.

  Daddy is home. He is home so early. He is normally gone. Mummy is sitting on the bed and Daddy is talking. Mummy looks scared. Daddy looks angry.

  “I know about Tony, Diana. I know what you’ve been fucking doing behind my back!” Daddy said a bad word. Mummy looks like she is going to cry.

  “You’re not going to even deny it? I love you Di. Fuck, we have a son!” I must stay quiet and then Mummy will find me later.

  “Harrison, please, stop. Let’s talk about this calmly. No, please, don’t!” Daddy is going to hurt Mummy again. She always cries after. He always leaves marks on her; she has to
wear jackets to cover them. I wish I could help Mummy. Mummy has blood on her face. Mummy is crying and it makes me cry, too. I have to keep quiet for Mummy. Daddy keeps hitting her, he is so mad at Mummy. He is on top of her and pulling up her light blue dress; Daddy has taken his belt and trousers off. Mummy is screaming at him, but Daddy doesn’t listen to Mummy. Daddy throws his suit jacket against the closet where I am hiding. I don’t want to watch but I need Mummy. She told me to hide.

  I see as Daddy is on top of Mummy. He is holding her hands to the floor and Mummy keeps screaming. Daddy grabs her head and pushes it down onto the ground hard; he keeps doing it while he moves on top of her. I’m scared. I feel the inside of my trousers get damp as I get more scared. I cry quietly as I watch my Mummy’s blood go into the carpet. Daddy stops and looks over at Mummy. He sees her blood on the carpet and says bad words. He yells at my Mummy, calling her stupid and dirty. I hate Daddy. I see him look towards the closet and he is getting closer. I’m so scared. The closet opens…

  I open my eyes screaming. I search for Aimee in my bed, I panic. Where the fuck is she? I look around the room and finally at the door. She looks at me, her hazel eyes filled with tears and her hand on the handle of the door that’s open just a little. I say nothing and watch as she closes the door. She looks at me and cries. Her tears look like tears I’ve seen before, like tears of someone else. She moves from the door back to the bed and kneels to be level with me.

  “You screamed.” She said it so calmly, like it was natural, and I felt betrayal rise in me. Of course she wants to leave. I’m just a murderer and a captor to her. I was fooled.

  “You were leaving. I’d hate to stop you,” I grunted in disdain. I had no real right to give a fuck but for some messed up reason, I felt she owed me something. Yes, she owed me for the hell I’d bestowed upon her.

  “I was, I would have… but you screamed. You can’t blame me for wanting to leave you, Draco.”