Inside the bathroom, his hands framed my face. Pulling away, he breathed, “You can go first.” He flashed me a smile that reminded me of the kind and gentle guy he’d been. Leaving me alone, he closed the bathroom door behind him.
A part of me wanted to lock the door. But what would that say? That I no longer trusted the guy who had basically stopped our relationship from moving further despite my pleas all along? So slowly I took off my clothes and tried not to shiver because a part of me kept expecting him to walk in at any moment.
It wasn’t until I was done and turning off the water that I totally relaxed until I realized I had no change of clothes with me in the bathroom. I dried my hair the best I could and longed for a ponytail holder. Looking in the mirror with my damp hair falling in waves like curls over my shoulder and down my back, I felt exposed even with the towel wrapped around me. I could handle this, I thought to myself taking deep breaths.
Opening the door, Luke was standing right outside the door. Shock must have been on my face. “Are you okay?” he questioned. I bit my lip and nodded. “I felt your pain in there,” he confessed. “That’s a part of the whole guardian thing. When you have strong emotions, I’m in tune with them.”
Yes, that, I’d almost forgotten. “Why didn’t you tell me you were my guardian?” I managed to say. Really, I had no right to ask because I was the queen of secrets myself. But there was no stopping the words.
Now it was his turn to look guilty. “We aren’t allowed and I gave it up to be with you,” he said honestly. “Look, you’re shivering. I’m going to take a shower and then we can talk.”
He headed into the bathroom. Once I heard the shower running, I got dressed. I put on the pink Juicy sweat pants he liked. I even put on a bra before my tank top. Normally, I didn’t sleep wearing a bra, but it felt necessary. Looking in his mirror, I still felt exposed in my tank top. So I pulled open a few of his drawers until I found his tee shirts and shrugged into one.
I cocked an ear when I swore I heard him singing. He was singing in the shower. Finding myself pressed against the door, I shuffled away when the water cut off. I looked at his bed but opted for the sofa in front of the television. Pulling an afghan that was hanging over the side over me, I turned on the television. Just then the door opened and I made the mistake of looking back at him.
He stood wearing nothing but the towel that was draped low on his hips. The demon stirred inside me. Suddenly, I was swallowing fear of being alone with him here in this room with no one to interrupt us. Why was I nervous?
Looking away, I focused on the television. The sound was off and I was looking for the mute button to undo it when I heard the towel fall onto the carpet. It should not have made a sound, but when it hit the ground, it was like thunder during a summer rain storm. The noise seemed to reverberate throughout the room. Forcing myself to breath, I didn’t look from the infomercial that filled the screen. Time seemed to be interminable.
Only after I heard a drawer open and close did I close my eyes in silent thanks. Feeling terribly awkward, I said nothing keeping my eyes straight. I couldn’t explain my feelings. I mean isn’t this what I wanted. Yes, he was acting strange but the why of it all would be stating the obvious. I’d damned him, and it was affecting him. Saying so may only make him realize that I wasn’t worth all that he’d given up.
Dressed, he parked himself next to me on the sofa in nothing but basketball shorts. His blond curls were still damp like my hair. “Want to watch Star Wars?” he asked, grinning at me.
I had to smile remembering the horrid afternoon watching the movie with all of them. “No, not really. I think I’ve lost the thrill for that movie for a while.”
Flashing me a smile, he said, “How about the latest Saw movie? I know how much you like horror movies.”
Things felt settled again with his words. The only pressure I’d felt before was my own. Being alone with him and little chance of any interruptions, he still hadn’t expected a thing. “Sounds cool,” I said.
On his side of the couch, he reached out an arm to me coaxing me closer. I crawled over and leaned against his chest. He tucked his arm around me pulling me even closer. While lying on his chest, I watched as he made selections through the cable on-screen options to bring the horror flick to life. Warmth in his arms relaxed me further making it so that I soon found myself drifting off to sleep.
Chapter Thirty Four
McKayla
A wry grin crept across my face. The girl was mercifully asleep. A soft chuckle escaped my mouth at my own little joke.
Pressed against the hard body, I listened to his heart beating in my ear. I snaked my hand down from its perch high on his chest and down into his lap. He stirred. Pay dirt. I had to be careful. He would not be happy to see me. But if I played my cards right, he may never know.
I had to be quick and keep my eyes closed as though that were natural. Lifting my hand, I threaded my fingers in his hair and pulled his head down to meet my hungry mouth.
Closing my eyes only after I spied him sleeping, he didn’t fight me and responded quite nicely. He kissed me back matching my own need. Wanting to move things further, I had to be cautious and not make a move that might give me away. I moved slowly to sit his lap to have better access to his mouth. He groaned and I couldn’t help the feeling of triumph I felt. Maybe I should have made my move on her boyfriend all along. It was a win/win for all of us. She couldn’t hate me for making our first time with the boy she so loved.
His hand was still patiently on my back. I was getting annoyed he wasn’t making the moves I longed for. This boy was not inexperienced. Why he was playing choir boy with Mercy? It was driving me insane. I had all but convinced the girl that losing her virginity was a viable option. And he was thwarting my every opportunity. Sebastian wasn’t going to do the deed. And Flynn wasn’t here. But I was beginning to believe that Paul might be the only one to do it.
Okay, so here was where all the seduction I possessed would pay off. I was going to speak to him. He knew her though, so I had to be careful and not say too much. Pulling back and biting my lip, that had inadvertently worked with Flynn on their last car ride, so I tried it now. Keeping my eyes downcast, I waited a beat, then said, “Luke.”
I let his name linger before I pressed kisses to his neck, and moved up to his ear. “Please,” I said as sweetly as I could muster.
Wiggling a little, shifting myself further in his lap, he choked a few words. “Are you sure?”
Nodding, he still did nothing. So I leaned closer to his ear and whispered the words trying to sound a bit unsure like Mercy would sound. “Yes.”
His fingers brushed against the skin at my waist as they tucked under my shirt. Seeming unsure, his hands didn’t move with the speed I would think how most boys would react if given the green light. Patience they say is a virtue and I had none. But if I moved too soon or seemed too eager, I’d give myself away. I bit my lip again fighting back a groan of protest for his slowness.
Before I could say something that would give me away, I snaked an arm behind my back and popped the clasp on my bra. Doing nothing else, I hoped it would give a little encouragement to the angel to stop hesitating.
Boy, I was good. All too soon, he peeled the first layer of Mercy’s defense off in the form of his shirt that she wore. Only one more article of clothing stood in the way of most of my flesh being revealed. The bra undone would pose no problem to shed quickly afterwards.
Not as gentle, he pulled my mouth back to his. Moments later, panting, he pulled back. He was trying to meet my eyes, but that was not an option. Breathing in deep was a cover for me closing my eyes. I shed the final layer of clothing and pressed myself to him. Kissing him again, I was able to keep my eyes closed. We were skin to skin since he wasn’t wearing a shirt. I was fifty percent there.
With his arms tightly around me, we were one. Setting my mouth free, he said, “We should wait.”
And here is where I made my mistake. “Stop bein
g such a girl already,” I said.
He stilled. Man, my cover was blown. His hands let go of me. I could feel the burn of his eyes on me even though mine were closed. “Open your eyes,” he said. His voice was as chilly as my skin was now that we weren’t touching.
Biting my lip once more because I knew I was caught at my attempted seduction. I let my eyes drift open, first looking down unable to meet the heat of his stare. And unfortunately, it wasn’t the heat of passion but more like the heat of anger.
The jig was up. I met his stare with grit of my own. He lifted me off his lap and gently put me down next to him. The gentleness was all for her. That much I knew. I saw the contempt in his eyes. There was no way I was leaving this room in control of her body. So I’d lost another chance. Part of me wanted to wake the girl up and let her take control. I could push my thoughts to her as I’d been doing subtlety and she may get us to where I wanted us to be.
“Leave,” he growled.
Okay, I expected this. I wasn’t backing down however. “You act like this is possession and you can cast me out,” I said matching his scorn.
“Maybe I’ll send you to hell where you belong,” he said with utter resolve to make it so.
I laughed and angled myself on the couch with my chin up and boobs out. “I’d like to see you try. Your girlfriend would go right along with me.”
This boy had balls of steal because he didn’t ogle all my bared flesh. Gosh, that was annoying. She and I had great assets.
“You and her aren’t like the rest. You two are separate. So with you in control, I might just be sending you and freeing her.”
Goose bumps popped over my naked flesh. I wondered if that was true. He couldn’t know that or he would have done that very thing long ago. Smiling I said, “You don’t scare me. I doubt you’d risk it.”
His eyes dropped to slits and a wicked smile crossed his face. This was a look I was unfamiliar with. Mercy was right. Something wasn’t the same with this boy. “You don’t know what I’d risk,” he spat.
Fear ran through me. He was serious. “If you won’t do it, I’ll find someone else. Perhaps Paul. He is human. I could latch on to his mind and get him to overlook my eyes.”
Okay, maybe provoking him wasn’t the best idea. His hands balled into fists and I thought for a second he might hit me.
“If you try to give yourself to anyone without Mercy’s permission, I will send you to hell and meet you there,” he promised.
Taunting him because I could, I said with a sneer, “Then you better start acting like a man and not a boy and take what’s being offered you before it’s offered to another.”
His hand shot up around my throat and his eyes went from bright blue to midnight. Gasping for air, I couldn’t believe he’d hurt us. Holding his forearm, it didn’t appear he was going to release me. Closing my eyes I drifted back. I would let the girl see the horror she’d made before we met our end.
~
MERCY
Gripping the arm, I clung to the fringes of consciousness even though I’d only just awoken. Popping my eyes open, I had to see my assailant. I had no strength left to fight back. But I had to know who was ending my life.
The last of my breath caught when I saw who it was. My heart ached even more with the knowledge. “Luke,” I managed to choke out.
His eyes flashed and you’d think it was the first time he’d seen me. Immediately, he let his grip go. My hands clasped at where his hand had been before like somehow that would help air reach my lungs. Choking and coughing, Luke was muttering apologizes while I tried to get my breath back.
Tears in my eyes from the coughing spell, he wiped at them still apologizing. Looking down unable to meet his gaze, I saw I wore no top. Head snapping up, fear flooded me the same time realization came. She had been here. My demon had evidently provoked him in some way. Covering myself with my hands, still taking in great gulps of air, he reached to the floor and handed me my tank top I’d been wearing earlier. Averting his eyes, he gave me privacy that didn’t seem necessary at this point. He’d seen the goods. His actions only reminded me of the gentle caring guy he was. But somehow it contrasted with the new one who’d resorted to violence, against even me.
Covered, he turned to me and buried his face against my heart. “I’m so sorry, Mercy.”
Not knowing what else to do, I held him and soothed him even though I was in need of consoling. “It’s okay,” I said. Was it? But then again, I’d done this to him. This was all my fault.
Chapter Thirty Five
expiate (v.) to make amends for, atone
Pockets of golden sunlight streamed through Luke’s windows waking me from the most restful sleep I’ve had in too many days to count. Warm arms held me close and my heart exploded from how incredibly loved I felt. After days of disappointing so many people on so many levels, just to know that someone cared breathed life into my withering heart. It beat in time with the boy whose breath caressed my shoulder. Then slowly, his finger glided up my arm in a touch so familiar, I could have guided it by memory as it traces my arm. My dream made real.
“Good morning Cinderella or is it Sleepy Beauty,” he said softly as he continued to trace patterns down my arm.
A burst of giggles escaped me and I turned in his arms to face him. Whispering in his ear, I said, “What do you know about fairy tales?”
Against my ear, he said, “That they do come true,” he said. “My little cousin swears by them.”
“Oh, does she?” I asked.
“She told me after we had a tea party. And she promised that the tiara I wore was perfect.” He laughed and I did too.
“We’re late,” I said.
“You sure you want to go to school?” he asked, pulling me close. Next thing I knew he was tickling me and I was laughing.
“Mercy,” he said, using the double meaning of my name.
“Fine,” I laughed breathlessly.
Luke was teaching me how to play Madden when a doorbell sound came from the wall. Playing hooky was turning out to be a lot of fun. Even though I’d done enough of it lately, I wasn’t much for skipping school. But Luke had been very convincing. Hell, I’d broken so many rules lately, it didn’t seem like such a big deal to add one more.
Getting up, he walked over to a small panel on his wall I hadn’t really paid much attention to before. He appeared to be looking at a screen but from my vantage point, I couldn’t see what he saw.
Pressing a button, he spoke into the panel. “What do you want Flynn?” he asked dryly. I had a moment to mourn the passing of their friendship.
A voice that was slightly crackly sounded through the silent room with Madden on pause. “Maggie was looking for Mercy. She begged me to drive her over here,” Flynn said.
Maggie. I got up from the couch and looked for my jeans. My phone. I didn’t have it. That’s right, I’d left it charging in Flynn’s car. Funny, I hadn’t thought about SAT words in a while.
“You have a key. Why didn’t you just come in?” Luke asked matter-of-factly.
Turning to look at him, I wished things were still good between them still. “I wasn’t sure what I might be walking in on, so I thought I’d ring the bell first.”
“Come up,” Luke said, pushing a button and then walked away.
Standing, I looked at my half dressed boyfriend. “Maybe you should put a shirt on,” I said with a grin.
Smiling at me he walked over to his bureau. He pulled out a shirt and a sweatshirt. After closing the door, he tossed me the sweatshirt. Amazingly I caught it. “What’s this for?” I asked.
“As much as I like the view of you in that tank top, I’d rather not have to poke Flynn’s eyes out for checking you out,” he said. I chuckled but he didn’t. Crap, he was serious.
I pulled the sweatshirt over my tank not wanting the two friends to fight, least of which over me. A knock at the door preceded Flynn and Maggie’s entrance. I was pulling my hair out of the Georgetown hoodie Luke had given me when
Flynn busted in not bothering to wait for us to answer. Maggie was on his heels.
Dramatically, Maggie ran over to me and gave me the biggest hug. Stumbling a little, I hugged her back. I’d missed her. “I’ve been calling you. You had me worried.”
Breaking from the hug, I said, “I left my phone in Flynn’s car.” I peeked over at him. He pulled something from his pocket and tossed it to me. After a fumbling grab, I actually caught it. Two for two. “Thanks,” I said to him. He nodded.
Maggie walked over to the couch and sat making herself at home. I went over and sat next to her. “So, like no one is at school,” she began. And I already knew not to interrupt her. “Jay and Kathy aren’t there, Paul isn’t either, Sebastian is MIA, you and Luke -” she said and looked at both of us in turn conspiratorially.
Waiting for Mercy (Cambions) Page 33