“Knew what?” Veronica softly said as she slid up on the sofa next to him.
“I knew you would make me forget all my troubles.” Jonathan leaned in and kissed Veronica on the forehead. “Thank you.”
Veronica giggled. “My pleasure, baby. My pleasure.”
Jonathan wrapped his arm around Veronica and leaned back, a huge smile across his face. Maybe getting over Tracy would be easier than he thought.
13
RACHEL PATTED THE WAD of cash in her jacket pocket. This was her fifth time checking it since she and her mother left for the mall an hour ago. She didn’t want to put the money in her wallet, fearing a thief might try to snatch her purse once they were there. If anybody wanted this money, they’d have to wrestle her to the ground for it.
Eight hundred dollars. Rachel was still in shock over the unexpected gift. Lester had shown up at her parents’ house last night. When she first saw him, she immediately jumped on the defensive, but then he’d handed her a bouquet of flowers and an envelope of cash. It turned out Lester had received a large check from his father’s insurance policy. Lester’s father had died a couple of months earlier in a tragic car accident. His mother had died two years prior, and Lester was an only child. The only other relative he had was an aging grandmother.
When Rachel saw all those crisp one-hundred-dollar bills, she thought she was going to faint. She did make a halfhearted attempt to return the money, praying the entire time that Lester would say no. Her wish came true. Lester claimed he had no one to spend all that money on. All Rachel heard was his reference to “all that money.” She wanted to ask him just how much money he received, but decided against it. Lester made her day even more when he insisted that she take the money and go shopping, something he knew she loved to do. He said he wanted her to pamper herself. The only thing he’d made her promise was that she buy something for the kids. He also told her not to spend any of the money to pay bills. He promised to help her with that later if she needed it.
Rachel wanted to jump for joy. She’d never been on a shopping spree, other than back-to-school shopping, and with her father’s tight rein on the money, that had never been much fun. Rachel was so excited that she threw her arms around Lester’s neck and planted a juicy kiss right on his lips. She closed her eyes, so it hadn’t been totally repulsive. The kiss had caught them both by surprise and left them both speechless. Rachel had felt so guilty about accepting the money that she agreed to go out to dinner with him the next night.
Her father, who along with her mother had witnessed the whole exchange, called her a high-priced hooker for taking the money, then agreeing to a date. At first Rachel was mad, but the more she thought about what she’d buy, the less her father’s words stung.
“Rachel, I still don’t think it’s right, you taking that boy’s money,” Loretta said as they pulled into the parking garage at Baybrook Mall.
Rachel exhaled loudly. Maybe bringing her mother along wasn’t such a good idea, but Loretta hadn’t been looking good lately. Rachel attributed it to years of putting up with her father. She knew her mother was stressed, so she wanted to take her to get a manicure and pedicure, maybe even buy her some nice clothes, too.
“Mama, you were standing right there. You heard Lester say he wanted to give this money to me, no strings attached.”
“Yeah, but you wouldn’t be going out with him if he hadn’t given you that money.”
“That’s not true. I’ve been out with Lester before,” Rachel protested.
“Usually right after he pays your rent or does something else nice for you.” Loretta shook her head. “Doesn’t that boy know he can’t buy love?”
“He only helped me with my rent one time. Besides, Lester and I are just friends. He doesn’t really have anyone, so he clings to me. That’s it. Plus, he knows my heart belongs to Bobby.”
Loretta pursed her lips and gazed out the window. “Don’t get me started on that.”
“Please, don’t say anything,” Rachel mumbled. “I really …” Rachel’s voice trailed off when she noticed the black Ford Expedition parked in an aisle near the front of the mall entrance. The license plate read “Miss S.”
Rachel turned up her nose with contempt. So Shante was at the mall. “I’m sure she’s spending up a storm in Lane Bryant, trying to find something cute to impress my man.”
“What are you talking about?” Loretta said. “And why are you stopping?”
Rachel shook herself out of her trance. “Oh, nothing. There’s a space over there.” Rachel pointed to the next aisle, then maneuvered her mother’s van down it, swinging into a parking space.
They had just stepped into the mall when Rachel turned to her mother. “Mama, I’ll be right back. I think I dropped my sunglasses when we were getting out of the car.”
“I didn’t see you with any glasses.”
“Just go on. I’ll meet you in the children’s section of Dillard’s in just a minute.”
“Okay, fine,” Loretta said. Rachel waited until her mother had gone up the escalator before she turned around and dashed back out the store entrance. She scanned the rows of cars to see where it was she’d seen Shante’s truck. “There it is,” she mumbled when she spotted the Expedition sitting between a Ford Taurus and a Chevy Suburban. “Too bad it’s so close to the front.”
Rachel ducked to the side of the Suburban that was parked farthest from the mall. She pulled up her purse and began sifting through it. Where was a good pocketknife when you needed one? She spotted her metal nail file and pulled it out. Rachel looked around to make sure no one was watching, then she took the file, leaned down, and jabbed it into the sidewall of the Expedition’s back tire as hard as she could. Nothing. Rachel drew her arm back and jabbed again, and again, and again, until finally she heard the air hissing out of the tire. Rachel moved to the front tire, repeating the process. She did it two more times on the other side until all the tires were flat. By then, her arm was throbbing with pain. Rachel stepped back and admired her work. She then looked around one more time to make sure no one had spotted her. When she was sure it was safe, she ran her fingers through her hair, and dropped the nail file back into her purse. She spotted her keys and her eyes lit up in thought. Rachel removed the keys, pulled out the longest one, then positioned it between her fingers before running it along the side of Shante’s truck. Rachel whistled with a nonchalant look across her face as she ran the key back and forth several times. Satisfied with what she’d done, Rachel dropped the keys in her purse and walked back inside the mall.
She had just stepped off the escalator when she spotted her mother pressed up against a wall. She had a pale look across her face. “Mama, are you all right?” Rachel asked.
“Sshhh!” Loretta put her finger to her lips.
Rachel looked confused. Her mother looked like she was straining to hear the conversation that was going on right around the corner. Rachel listened intently. It must be something important because it wasn’t like her mother to eavesdrop.
“Do you know what I could do with a hunk of man like Simon Jackson?” one of the voices said.
Rachel’s eyes got wide. “Who is that?” she whispered to her mother.
“Delilah,” her mother whispered back. “And Carrie Thompson from church.”
Rachel frowned up. She recognized Delilah’s sultry voice.
“Are they talking about Daddy?”
Loretta motioned for her to be quiet.
“Girl, who wouldn’t love to get them some Simon Jackson? Honey, that is one good-looking man,” Carrie responded.
“Tell me something I don’t know,” Delilah said. “Five minutes. That’s all I need and I could turn that man out. He’d think God himself had sent me down for his personal pleasure.”
Carrie laughed. “You know his old, plain-Jane, chunky wife ain’t turning nothing out but a plate of biscuits every time you turn around. I just can’t for the life of me understand why he stays with her.”
“I’ve stopped trying t
o figure that out. I’ve just come to the conclusion that it’s a charity case. You know, like maybe he just feels sorry for her. I just know if I was first lady of the church, I would come in every Sunday morning in a brand-new suit with a matching hat, gloves, and shoes. You know I’d be working it.”
“I know you would, girl. Hell, you look and dress better than Loretta anyway. You look like a first lady should look.”
“The problem is convincing Simon of that. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve all but thrown myself at that man. I put these 36DDs up in his face and he just ignored them. No man can resist these!” Delilah exclaimed.
“Well, I’m sure you won’t give up until you get him. You’re a determined woman.” They both burst out laughing.
Loretta became paler and paler. Rachel stood with her mouth wide open. She was furious and had had enough. She didn’t care what they said about her father, but they weren’t about to sit there and disrespect her mother like that. “Unh-unh.” Rachel started heading around the corner. Loretta grabbed her by the arm. “No!”
“What?” Rachel heard Delilah and Carrie’s laughter grow distant and she peeked around the corner. They were heading toward the lingerie section. “Mama, I know you’re not going to let them talk about you like a dog and you not say anything.”
Loretta looked like she was fighting back tears. She swallowed. “We came here to do some shopping, so we’re going to do some shopping.”
Rachel stared at her mother in disbelief. She knew her mother didn’t have much of a backbone with her father, but this was too much.
Loretta ignored Rachel and walked over to a rack. She picked up a blue jean jacket and matching pants. “I saw this for Jordan when I first walked in. Don’t you think it’s cute?”
Rachel followed her mother, stunned. “Mama, I don’t believe you. What is wrong with you? Don’t you have any pride? This is ridiculous. I mean, I’ve heard of weak women in my life, but you take the cake. They called you fat, ugly, and Delilah all but said she was going to take your husband. And you just stand there. How can you be so spineless? Don’t you even care how—”
Rachel was unprepared for the slap she received from her mother’s right hand. The blow stunned Rachel and stopped her from finishing her sentence. She looked at her mother, dumbfounded. Not only because they were standing in the middle of the department store but also because her mother hadn’t struck her in years.
“Shut up! Shut up right now!” Loretta said. “I can’t do anything about those hussies disrespecting me, but I won’t have my own child disrespecting me!”
Rachel felt tears welling up. Where had that come from? The blow hurt like hell. She also had never seen her mother that angry. Loretta’s cinnamon complexion had turned red in fury.
“Don’t you think I know what those women say about me? It’s not the first time I’ve heard that nonsense,” Loretta hissed. “I know people wonder why Simon is with me. They’ve been wondering for years. Do those comments still hurt? Yes. But if I don’t know nothing else, I know my husband loves me. For me.”
Rachel rubbed her cheek, taking in her mother’s words. “But Mama, he treats you so bad.”
“How? He doesn’t beat me, cheat on me. So what makes him a bad husband? Because he asks me to clean and cook? Because I’m submissive to him? Let me tell you something, Rachel.” Loretta leaned in close to her daughter. “I submit to him because I choose to. I choose to follow God’s words and let the man lead. I know you new-age women can’t understand that, but that’s what I do. And I do it with my head held high. I love cooking, cleaning, and being a good wife. I love taking care of my husband and if that makes me a disgrace to womankind, then I’m sorry. But I won’t apologize for who I am, or how I am.”
Rachel stared at her mother in amazement. It had never crossed her mind that her mother actually liked being submissive, let alone doing it for biblical reasons.
Rachel removed her hand from her cheek. “Well, I guess I’ll never be married. Because I refuse to let a man treat me the way Daddy treats you.”
“Your father treats me just fine. Do I wish he spent more time with us? Absolutely. Do I agree with the way he treats you and David? No. But Simon is struggling with his own demons because he feels like a failure as a father. But if I don’t know anything else, I know he loves me and each one of you kids. Now, I’m grateful that the Lord blessed me with a man like Simon, whose biggest fault is he spends too much time in his church.”
Rachel sniffed and wiped away the single tear falling down her face. Her father felt like a failure? That was news to her. Still, she couldn’t agree with her mother’s rationale.
“I’m sorry, but I still think you’re mad at Carrie and Delilah and taking it out on me.”
Loretta’s voice turned gentle. “Rachel, I’m not mad at them. I’m happy with who I am, all 228 pounds of me. That’s what you don’t understand; beauty is from within. You’re always talking about Shante, how fat she is. But I’d be willing to bet, Bobby fell in love with her mind. When you have that, everything else falls into place.”
Rachel’s heart sank at the mention of Bobby loving someone else. She sucked it up and tried to force a smile. While she didn’t agree with her mother, she felt a newfound respect for her.
Loretta straightened her back and held her head up. “Now, come on, let’s go do some shopping.”
14
WHY WAS LIFE so complicated? Jonathan thought being with Veronica would return his life to normal. No such luck. He lay across the bed in his room, staring at a picture of his family. He, David, and Rachel were all little on that picture. It was taken in Virginia Beach, at one of the few family vacations they had ever taken. His dad looked like a proud father in that picture. Over the years, slowly but surely, that proud look had faded as far as David was concerned. Then Rachel. Jonathan knew it was only a matter of time before it would be gone for him as well.
The phone rang, breaking the silence that had settled in the room. Jonathan looked at the Caller ID. It was Veronica, again. He really didn’t mean to avoid her, but the other night proved he just wasn’t ready for another relationship. Not yet anyway. Granted, she finally gave him an erection, but with her off her cycle, she’d want to have full sex. What if he couldn’t come through? It was all he’d thought about since that night. The last three women he’d been with before Tracy had all been a bust, including his last time with Angela. He had lied and told them he was on medication, but it was still embarrassing.
The phone continued to ring. It was like she hung up, waited two minutes, and called right back. Did she know he was avoiding her calls? Jonathan had to get his head together. He thought being with Veronica would make him forget Tracy, but it only made things worse. He had to decide if he was going to love Tracy all the way or not at all. Why couldn’t he just make up his mind?
Jonathan leaned in and cut off the ringer on his phone. This was her eighth call today. She had left a nasty message on his cell phone talking about how she didn’t appreciate him not returning her calls. A soft knock on the door startled Jonathan out of his thoughts.
“Hey, Dad,” Jonathan said, answering it.
“Hey, Son.” Simon eased into the room, looked around and smiled. “You’ve been here weeks and your room is still immaculate. Rachel and David would have had this place in shambles by now.”
Jonathan managed a slight grin and sat on the edge of his bed. He knew his father always favored him, that’s why it was so difficult to be honest with him. He wasn’t sure that being a preacher was his calling. He wasn’t sure if he was even worthy of being a preacher. He could never tell his father that. It would tear him up.
“You know I’ve always been a neat freak, Dad.”
“I know. I remember you talking about how it drove your roommate crazy.” Simon laughed. “But that’s my boy. You got it together all the way around.”
If only you knew, Jonathan thought. “So, Reverend Jackson, what brings you into this neck of the woods
?”
Simon sat down in the black leather chair across from Jonathan’s bed. “I just wanted to talk to you, Son. You don’t look the same. Oh, you put on a good front, but I see it in your eyes. Is something wrong?”
Jonathan gazed at his father. How he wished he could tell him the truth, but that would never, ever happen. Jonathan looked down. He didn’t want to tear up.
“Is it Tracy?”
Jonathan’s mouth dropped open. How did his father know about Tracy?
“It is, isn’t it?” Simon continued. “I heard you on the phone with her the other day. I wasn’t eavesdropping, but you sounded very upset.” Simon patted Jonathan on the knee. “You can talk to me, Son. Is Tracy your girlfriend?”
Jonathan didn’t know what to say. “No.”
“Not any more?”
“Something like that,” Jonathan responded. He desperately wanted to end this conversation.
“So you two broke up? Is that why you decided to move back home? Is that what has you walking around here so gloomy?”
Jonathan looked away so his father couldn’t see the tears in his eyes.
“Son, it’s okay. We all get our hearts broken at one time or another. I remember the only other woman I loved besides your mother. Her name was Lillian Butler. She was like a cool glass of lemonade on a hot summer day.” Simon smiled at the memory. “That woman was spectacular, and she broke my heart in a thousand pieces. Up and married some doctor. Said she couldn’t spend her life as a preacher’s wife. I never thought I’d heal from that. Probably like you’re feeling right now. But two months after that, I met your mother, and she made me forget all about Lillian. So see, I promise you, you’ll find you another young woman to steal your heart. Although, honestly, I think you’ve found her already. That Angela is something else. You really should try to work things out with her. Everything happens for a reason. We may not understand God’s motives, but He knows what’s best for us. Turn to your faith now, son. It’ll help you be strong, and it’ll help you heal.”
Let the Church Say Amen Page 8