“You okay? I didn’t hurt you, did I?” He seemed really worried, and Jake slid his arms around to link in the small of Ryan’s back.
“I’m fine, Ryan, promise. I’m just a little sore, and I am pretty sure it’s normal.” He leaned down to whisper in Ryan’s ear. “I can still feel you inside me, and I like it.”
He nuzzled into Ryan’s neck, a little shocked by his own admission. Ryan held him close before pulling back and kissing him. The bit of sadness was back in his eyes, but Jake let it go for now. He didn’t want to push Ryan while they were out here. It was an even more special place for him now. He would talk to him back at the ranch.
Ryan let go and insisted that Jake get on first. “That way you can lean against me and maybe get a little cushioning?” Now it was Ryan’s turn to blush a little. Jake grinned, but did as he was asked.
Ryan swung up behind him and scooted in close, so that Jake was almost sitting in his lap. He wrapped both arms around Jake’s waist, letting him lean back against him. Jake loved the feeling of being cared for and grabbed one of Ryan’s hands, bringing it up to kiss the palm before putting it back on his stomach. They took one last look around their magical place, then Jake headed Aragorn for home.
When they got back to the ranch, they were surprised to see a truck in the driveway. Jake sighed and squeezed Ryan’s arms around him before whispering, “Shit.” He stopped Aragorn by the corral fence and let Ryan slide off before getting down himself. He grabbed Ryan’s hand, pulling him in for a quick kiss, before turning to meet the black-haired tornado bearing down on him.
“Hello, Jen.” He was still holding Ryan’s hand, not letting him go even when he tried to pull away, seeing the look of fury on the woman’s face. She was beautiful and angry, and she obviously had something to say to Jake. She looked at Ryan and then followed their arms down to their linked hands, her eyes widening.
“What the hell is going on, Jake? I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for two days, and you haven’t answered. I needed you!” She pouted prettily and pushed her chest out further, trying to force Jake’s attention to her rather ample tits. Ryan would have laughed if he hadn’t been feeling so sick to his stomach. Did Jake have a girlfriend? He tried to pull away again, but Jake held firm.
“Jen, I told you before, I’m not running over to fix your problems anymore. You have a husband for that. I told you a long time ago I wasn’t interested in you!”
The woman snorted her derision and sidled closer to Jake, ignoring Ryan, trying to get her body closer to Jake’s. “He’s useless, too busy screwing around and gambling to do any work.” She was whining now and not quite as beautiful.
Jake just stepped back, taking Ryan with him, before pulling him closer and putting an arm around his waist. At that, the woman’s full fury returned. She reached up with both hands, pushing Ryan, trying to get him away from Jake.
“Get the hell away from him, you fucking pervert!” Ryan was shocked and didn’t know what to do, but Jake was furious. He let go of Ryan and grabbed her arm, pulling her all the way to her truck. He opened the door and shoved her in.
“Don’t you ever fucking talk to him that way again. Don’t show up here, and if you step foot on my property again, remember I have a shotgun.” He slammed the door and turned away, striding back to a stunned Ryan and wrapping him in his arms.
He buried his face in Ryan’s neck, shaking so hard Ryan thought he might break. They both listened as the truck started, and she drove away. Ryan brought both arms around him, holding him tight.
“Ryan, I am so, so sorry. That woman is completely nuts. Even before Mikayla left, she was hitting on me all the time, and after? God, she won’t leave me alone. I helped her out a few times because I thought she genuinely needed help, but it turned out she was wrecking things on purpose to get me there. She even went so far as to injure a horse to get me over there in the middle of the night.”
He stood there, breathing in Ryan’s smell, trying to calm down. The gentle hand running up and down his back was helping. He pulled back and looked into Ryan’s eyes, afraid of what he would see.
But Ryan was smiling at him, concerned, but not angry. “It’s not your fault, Jake. She isn’t the first angry female I’ve encountered. But, Jake, you know she won’t keep this quiet. Everyone’s gonna know.”
Jake just sighed. “I don’t care, Ryan. I never had any intention of hiding myself. And hiding you?” He squeezed Ryan against him, smiling like crazy. “Trying to hide you would be foolish and like trying to hide the sun, with the way you shine.” Ryan was blushing and adorable, and Jake couldn’t help the breath-stealing kiss he gave him.
“Why don’t you head for the house and the shower while I take care of Aragorn. It won’t take me long.” He expected an argument, but Ryan just nodded and gave him a mysterious smile. “Okay, hurry, though!” Ryan kissed him and went to the house while Jake took care of the horse.
It didn’t take him long. He walked in the door but was surprised not to hear the shower. He walked toward Ryan’s room. “Ryan?” He pushed the door open and was hit by the smell of vanilla and musk.
“In here, Jake.” Jake pushed the bathroom door open, and he was sure his heart must have stopped. The window curtains were closed, and there were a few candles lit, and there, in his bathtub, was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen. Ryan Andrews, wet, naked, and waiting for him.
“Care to join me?”
Jake couldn’t speak, so he only nodded. As he walked closer to the tub, he could see that Ryan hadn’t used bubble bath, but bath oil, and that crystal-clear water was doing nothing to hide the fact that Ryan was sitting there stroking his already hard cock. There was no way in hell he could get naked fast enough.
“Fuck, Ryan, are you trying to kill me?”
Ryan just smiled slyly. “Nope, but I bet a hot bath would feel real good right now, and maybe so would I?”
Jake was naked in a heartbeat. He dropped to his knees beside the tub, grabbing Ryan’s neck and giving him a passionate kiss before reaching into the tub to grab his cock and give it a few good strokes. He watched as Ryan dropped his head back, groaning at Jake’s touch, before he opened his eyes and put his lips right up to Jake’s.
“Get in here!” Jake’s cock twitched at the demand in Ryan’s voice, and he quickly stood and climbed in, settling between Ryan’s legs with his back against his chest.
The warm water felt heavenly, and he could feel himself relaxing. Ryan wrapped his arms around him and kissed the back of his neck. They sat there for a while, just being with each other and enjoying the feeling of each others’ bodies. Ryan took a washcloth from the side of the tub and wet it before rubbing it on the sweet-smelling soap he had found.
He started washing Jake’s chest and stomach, loving the sweet moans rumbling from Jake’s throat. He whispered in Jake’s ear, telling him how beautiful he was, how good he felt sitting against him. Jake turned his head back enough for a wet kiss, reaching one arm back to curl his hand around Ryan’s skull. The hand washing him kept slipping further down, until the cloth was left behind and Ryan’s hand was pulling gently on his cock. He could feel Ryan’s hard-on pressed into his back, and he remembered how it felt to be full of Ryan and whimpered, pushing back harder against the body behind him. Ryan nibbled on his ear and licked the sensitive spot under his ear.
“Jake, making love to you was amazing, but now I want something else.” Jake turned his head to look into his eyes. “I want to feel you inside me, Jake. I want to see you over me, looking in my eyes when I’m moaning your name ’cause you’re making me feel so good.” He leaned in to run his tongue around the shell of Jake’s ear. “Can you do that, Jake? Can you take that rock-hard cock of yours and slide it into my ass? I want you to, please?” He slid his hand up and down, taking care to not put too much pressure on the hot dick in his hand. He knew what he wanted, and he was going to get it.
Jake spun around in his arms, splashing water over the side of the tu
b and pressing Ryan back, plundering his mouth ruthlessly.
“Fuck, Ryan, what are you trying to do to me?” He couldn’t breathe, and he didn’t care. He pulled back and stood up, grabbing a towel from the rack. He reached down to take Ryan’s hand, hauling him to his feet. Ryan stepped out of the tub, and Jake dried him quickly before doing the same for himself. He pulled Ryan flush against him, pressing his face into Ryan’s neck, alternately licking and biting the soft flesh. Ryan turned his head to give him better access.
“I wanna fuck you, Ryan. God, I wanna be inside you.” He was feeling desperate and started pulling Ryan toward the bedroom. Ryan was holding back. Why? Jake was frantic, but Ryan was pulling him back.
“Ryyaannn.” It came out a whine, and Ryan smiled.
“Candles, babe.” He pulled away to blow them out before turning back to Jake and grabbing his hand. “Let’s go!”
Chapter 11
Ryan led Jake down the hallway, holding his hand and looking back over his shoulder with a smoldering look, and Jake was transfixed. He was sure there wasn’t a more beautiful sight anywhere. Ryan’s body was perfect, and touching it made him feel better than he had felt in his whole life. It was more than that, though, and Jake knew it. His heart was already involved, and the risk was overwhelming. Deep down, Jake knew it was worth it.
He pulled Ryan into his arms, unable to wait until they reached the bedroom to touch him. One hand slid into damp blond hair while the other slipped around his waist and splayed across the small of his back, brushing fingertips across the swell of that gorgeous ass. Ryan shivered, and it fueled Jake’s fire even more. Ryan snaked his arms around Jake’s neck and attacked his mouth. While he was doing that, Jake skidded the hand that had been in Ryan’s hair down his body, still trying to move them toward the bed. He grabbed Ryan’s leg and pulled it up, trying to wrap it around himself and pull their cocks closer together.
In his desperation, he pushed Ryan against the wall, sliding both hands down to grab warm flesh. Ryan brought his other leg up and locked it with the first, in the small of Jake’s back. Ryan’s cock was trapped between their bodies, and the feel of it, hot and leaking against his stomach, was making Jake wild. His own cock was pressed against the one place he wanted it to be, and he couldn’t take it anymore.
He pulled away from the wall, carrying Ryan with him. Stumbling the few steps to the bed, he gently lowered Ryan to lie on the blankets below. He pulled back then, to look at the breathtaking sight in front of him. Ryan lay there, arms crossed over his head like they were tied, legs still wrapped loosely around Jake. His cock was hard, arching proudly toward his stomach, begging to be touched. He put his hands on Ryan’s thighs, slowly stroking upward over his hips, coming to rest on Ryan’s chest. He played with the sensitive nipples until Ryan was writhing and moaning, the sounds he was making like music to Jake’s ears.
He slid down to take possession of Ryan’s mouth, running his tongue across the full bottom lip before licking his way inside. His hands slid around to pull Ryan’s chest flush against his. He couldn’t seem to get close enough.
“God, Ryan, you feel so good.” The words were whispered into a panting mouth before he trailed his lips to Ryan’s ear, feeling Ryan’s skin pebble at the air blowing across the sensitive skin. “You’re so soft, so hard, all at the same time.” He couldn’t stop tasting and touching. “Need you, fuck, Ryan, need you so bad.”
Ryan’s eyes opened and locked with his, and the little seed of worry or sadness was still there. As bad as Jake wanted to make love to Ryan, he couldn’t ignore it anymore. He touched his forehead to Ryan’s, sighing before reaching back and gently unwinding Ryan’s legs, lying down beside him, and gathering him up in his arms.
Ryan stiffened, and when Jake caught his eye again, the sadness was bigger. “I’m sorry, Jake. I’m pushing. I didn’t mean to; just let me go and I’ll leave.” He was trying to pull out of Jake’s arms, but Jake wouldn’t let him.
“Ryan, you aren’t pushing me. I am right where I want to be. But I need to know what that look in your eye is. I mean, you’re looking at me, and I feel more want and desire than I have ever felt in my life.” He pushed the hair out of Ryan’s eyes and kissed his forehead before pulling back again.
“What has you sad, Ryan? Did I do something, not do something? I need to know, Ryan, because I think that look is breaking my heart.” Ryan’s eyes widened at that and then welled up with tears.
He reached up and touched Jake’s face, tracing lines that were quickly becoming familiar. “It’s not you, Jake, I promise. I just don’t want you to feel like I’m trying to make you do something you don’t want to.” He was embarrassed that Jake had read him so easily. He thought that, after all this time, he would have been better at hiding it. And controlling himself. But the clear blue eyes looking at him were smiling.
“Ryan, that’s not the first time you’ve said something like that, like you’re forcing me to do something. You’re not, Ryan. I don’t want to be anywhere else, with anyone else. I promise. I want this, so much. Can’t you feel it? Feel me?”
Ryan had nuzzled his way into Jake’s neck while he was talking, and Jake was startled to feel hot tears on his chest. He brought his hand to the back of Ryan’s head and wrapped his other arm around Ryan’s shoulders, holding him closer. His voice was a whisper.
“Ryan, what happened to you? Who hurt you this bad?” Ryan snuggled into Jake’s embrace. He couldn’t look Jake in the eye, not yet.
“I left home three years ago, Jake. I stay away, away from my family, because I made a really bad mistake.” Every word sounded like it was being forced out over broken glass. “I had a friend, Mike, and he had been my best friend forever, all through junior high and high school. And when I came out in junior year, he stood by me, and I thought I was so lucky to have a friend like that. He got a girlfriend in senior year, and I was happy for him, but it made me realize that I had a crush on him. But they insisted that I be their third wheel all the time, and I kept it to myself, happy to just be his friend and hers too.”
He stopped then, trying to get some air, clear his throat, something to make the talking easier. It wasn’t working. Jake just kept holding him, tangling their legs together, trying to wrap himself around Ryan, to comfort him, make him feel safe, anything to stop the tears that were ripping his heart apart.
Ryan took a shuddering breath and then continued. “I guess I wasn’t as good at hiding my feelings as I thought, because one night he invited me out, guys’ night out, he said. So we went for a drive, and he brought a case of beer he had taken from his dad, and we ended up at the school football field. We used to do that all the time, before he started dating Cathy.”
Ryan was trembling, running his hands up and down Jake’s back, accepting the comfort Jake was offering. “We sat in the back of the truck, having a few beers, talking, and I was pretty happy. Then, all of a sudden, Mike looks at me and tells me he knows. I couldn’t figure out what he was talking about, but then his face was right in front of mine and he’s whispering that he knows I have a crush on him. And then he kissed me.” This drew another sob out of the wounded man in Jake’s arms.
“God, Jake, he kissed me, and at first I was so shocked, and then I was so happy, and I kissed him back. It felt so good, and I was so lonely, and then he was taking my shirt off, and he pulled me down on top of him, and I didn’t care about anything, not his girlfriend or how sudden it was, nothing.” Ryan started shaking harder now. But Jake stroked his back and kissed his hair and let him breathe, and soon he continued.
“He was holding me and touching me and kissing me. I thought I was so lucky to have my best friend love me. He wanted to take my jeans off, and I was trying to get his undone, and neither of us heard the car pull up. And then there was a flashlight, and he panicked and pushed me off. It was the school security guards, and one of them was the dad of a friend of Mike’s, and he saw us, and the look on his face was horrible. Like he wanted us dead, and Mik
e saw it, too, and the next thing I knew, he punched me.”
Ryan brought his hand up to his face, like he was remembering the pain, and his voice was a whisper when he spoke again. “He told the security guards I forced him. Said we were drinking beers and I jumped him, took advantage of him, and he looked at me like I was nothing, worse than nothing, and I fell out of the back of the truck and puked my guts out, and the whole while they both looked at me like I should be dead.” His voice was dead, like there was no emotion left in him to give, and for Jake it was worse than the tears.
“What happened, Ryan?”
Ryan looked at him like he had almost forgotten he was there. “He took us to their office and called our parents. My mom and dad came down, and so did his dad, and he wanted them to call the cops and press charges against me, but Mike said no, because he just wanted to forget about it and didn’t want anyone to know. And he wouldn’t look at me anymore, and my parents didn’t know what to say, and they sent us home, telling me to go to the principal’s office in the morning.”
His voice was scraping and cracking, like the physical act of talking was painful. “They said they believed me, my parents, but God, Jake, maybe I did? Maybe I pushed him? Maybe I was wrong, thinking he wanted it!” He was sobbing again, and Jake couldn’t take it anymore.
He pulled on Ryan’s hair gently, to tip his head up so he could look him in the eyes. “Ryan, you listen to me. You didn’t push him, and you didn’t push me. Mike was a confused kid who panicked and threw you under the bus to save himself. How old were you? Seventeen?”
Ryan shook his head. “Just turned eighteen.”
“It’s not in you, Ryan, to hurt someone in that way. You didn’t push me, Ryan, but you did pull me.” He smiled at the look of confusion on Ryan’s face. “You pulled me out of myself, and you pulled me into your orbit, and the pull of you had me crashing into you, but, Ryan? I was so ready, and I wanted it, wanted you! So please, believe me when I say you did nothing to force me, and that I am here because I want to be. What happened the next day?”
Cowboy Way Page 5