A New World: Sanctuary

by John O'Brien

Climbing over the mounds of bodies is difficult as they shift and slide. My boots sometimes sink between them like stepping into soft spots in a muddy swamp. I exit the mounds by the kitchen and step into the living room, alert for any hiding night runners. A sweep through the open living room and far bedroom reveals that none remain within the confines of the apartment. We’re clear for now. I backtrack to the bathroom entrance letting Robert know I am reentering the hall. It would totally suck to forget something as simple as that and be shot after all the night has held to this point. Communication is one of the most important keys to survival with a group.

  Meeting Lynn at the bathroom entrance, we step over the broken door and enter the bathroom. Lynn props the door against the entrance as best as possible to seal it against any light leaking out, and lights the candles. I remove my NVG’s, prop my gun, and lean against the counter with both arms. The candlelight reflects off the mirror revealing a different person staring back. I don’t recognize myself. My tired eyes looking back observe the blood on my forehead and neck. As I look at my reflection in the mirror, it seems like I’m watching myself through a third person. The area around my eyes is clear where my goggles were making me look like a reverse raccoon.

  This seriously can’t possibly continue in this manner, I think as Lynn takes one of the towels from the floor and pours water over my face and neck. The water runs off my head and into the sink turning the basin into a pink, swirling mix of water and blood. I feel a sting from the scratch. She begins to dab my face and neck with the towel clearing the blood away. Watching her tenderly administering to me, my heart is flooded with warmth. This was not the homecoming I imagined or anticipated.

  With the blood cleared, I see the scratch clearly. Not normally concerned with such a minor wound, the fact that it was from the night runners and that some of their saliva may have come into contact with it increases the worry factor. I need to be around for my kids and Lynn. The scratch itself runs from the middle of my neck down to my collar bone. In the yellow light of the candles, I see the skin around has already turned a bright red. Lynn rummages through drawers and a bathroom cabinet until she finds some gauze pads and tape.

  “Here, crush one of these up and sprinkle it on,” I say pulling another antibiotic pill out before Lynn applies the dressing.

  She takes out her knife and crushes the pill on the counter, sprinkles it on the scratch and covers it with the gauze and tape. Watching her with the tenderness and worry brings out another feeling within. The post adrenaline, close call, and watching her, well, brings about a certain desire. The problem is that we aren’t out of the danger zone yet and won’t be until the sun comes up, let alone the fact that there are others close by. Ugh!

  She puts the last of the tape in place and looks up at me through the mirror. “Jack, I know that look,” she says quietly with a small smile.

  “Mmmm hmmm,” I reply just as quietly with a tired yet mischievous smile.

  “We can’t here,” she says looking to the broken doors propped up against the bathroom doorway.

  “I think you’re looking the wrong way,” I say looking to the other door leading into the far bedroom.

  She looks longingly at the opposite door then shakes her head. “Jack, you have no idea how much I want to but we can’t,” she says with a sigh.

  I mimic her sigh, “I know but you’re in trouble when the sun rises.”

  “Deal,” she says with a larger smile.

  “Come on sunrise,” I say playfully and rinse my knife off in the sink.

  “Yeah, no shit,” she says with another sigh.

  Lynn looks at the white gauze and tape at my neck. “I think it’ll be okay. It only burns a little but not overly so,” I say answering her worried gaze.

  I give Lynn a kiss which threatens to develop further before we head back to the room after extinguishing the candles and donning our NVG’s. Seeing us enter the hall, Robert lowers his muzzle. Passing by my kneeling son, I pat him on the shoulder.

  “You doing okay, Dad?” He asks looking up through his goggles.

  “Yeah, thanks. How are you doing?” I ask in return.

  “Tired, but okay,” he answers.

  “Good.”

  Returning to the bedroom, Lynn and I sit next to where Bri is kneeling with her M-4 aimed across the bed. I ruffle her hair, “How are you doing, hon?”

  “I’m okay, Dad,” she responds looking up.

  I smile back at her. A flood of warmth and love for both of my kids flows through me. I am so proud of them but there is also an underlying fear for them given our situation. I wish I could just wake up and we could be back to the world we knew before; worrying about which fireworks show we were going to go see rather than which building is going to harbor night runners, when the next assault will occur, or how we are going to stay supplied.

  “We can’t continue like this,” I tell Lynn. “We can’t keep facing massive assaults like this. We’ve just been lucky so far.”

  “And sometimes less than lucky,” I add remembering the loss of the entire Delta Team.

  “Jack, we won’t have to worry about that so much once we get the sanctuary built and secured,” Lynn responds.

  “We’ll still have to go into buildings for supplies until we become self-sufficient. I mean, they have been in mass in almost every, single building lately,” I say.

  “Is it safe to come out?” Kelly asks from the closet with a whisper.

  “Yeah, we’re okay for the moment,” I answer.

  Brian, Kelly, and Jessica emerge from the closet and stand by the entrance. Brian takes a step forward. “Hey, I just wanted to say sorry and thanks man,” he says in a whisper.

  Oh sure, now he whispers, I think. “You know, I think it’s best that you not speak to me right now. You put my loved ones at risk and I’m not too keen with that,” I reply and he steps back to the closet entrance and plops down against the wall. Kelly squats next to him and they begin whispering in the dark.

  “Then don’t go into buildings,” Lynn says picking up our conversation. “Maybe it’s you.”

  “Very funny,” I say.

  “Seriously though, Jack, what choice do we have?”

  “Well, I know we can’t continue in this manner; with these kinds of encounters. We are being reactionary. It’s going to bite us in the ass harder one of these times,” I answer.

  “What are you thinking?” Lynn asks.

  “I am thinking we have two choices. Well, three but the third isn’t an option. The first is to build our haven, walls and all, then hunker down and let both us of live in our own environments. Let them have the night and we’ll have the day,” I answer.

  “And the second?” She asks taking in what I said and nodding.

  “Exterminate them all within our area,” I answer.

  “That’s the riskier solution in the short-term but maybe worth it. I’m not sure we have the manpower to do that though. So, which one are you thinking about?”

  “I’m not sure yet,” I reply.

  “Just curious, what was the third option?” She asks tilting her head to the side.

  “Give up,” I respond.

  “You’re right, that’s not an option,” she says knowing I wasn’t being serious.

  A muffled cough from Robert’s M-4 interrupts our conversation and startles all of us. Jessica lets out a small squeal. Lynn and I immediately jump off the bed, go to a kneeling position facing the front door, and shoulder our weapons. Nothing is moving at the door. It remains silent outside.

  Robert is in the line of fire so Lynn and I keep our muzzles lowered but ready to move up and engage if something enters the open doorway to our front. Not wanting to risk the additional noise of talking halfway across the bedroom, I move up to his side, leaving Lynn in place to help Bri cover the back door. I am anticipating a round two of our previous bout but the lack of shrieks doesn’t indicate one.

  Kneeling by Robert I ask, “What’s up?”

  He do
esn’t move his eyes or carbine from the front door as he answers, “One just poked its head around the side of the door.”

  “Did you get him?” I ask watching and listening for additional movement.

  “I think so,” he answers.

  I think about going up to the door to check; not only to see that the one night runner is down but to see if others remain outside. However, I don’t want to stir up trouble if there are others out there. If they are content to stay outside and leave us in peace, I am perfectly content to stay in here and leave them in peace. I listen for any sounds or calls both near and far. The night is as quiet and as void as deep space.

  I pat him on the shoulder again. “Nicely done,” I whisper into Robert’s ear.

  “Thanks,” he whispers back.

  “You doing okay here for a bit longer?” I ask.

  “Yeah, I’m fine,” he answers.

  I walk back into the bedroom past Brian, Kelly, and Jessica. Both Kelly and Jessica whisper their thanks for coming down to which I tell them no worries. I can tell Brian wants to say something along the same lines but wisely keeps quiet.

  “Okay everyone, we need to stay quiet as we’re not through this yet and there are bound to be more around. I think we’ll be okay in here as long as we keep absolutely silent,” I say plopping back onto the bed where I begin to silently load my empty mags.

  The apartment chills with the night air circulating through the open doors. I worry about our scent carrying outside however the rest of the night passes by without incident other than the scratch on my neck continuing to burn. We take turns resting and covering the entrances. I take several more antibiotics with Lynn undoing the tape and sprinkling more directly on the wound. The outside lightens with the coming dawn signaling a return to the safety of the day. We have survived another night; another encounter.

  With the dawning of a new day, we all relax. We toss our goggles in the Humvee and I gather Robert, Lynn, and Brian and we begin removing the bodies from the hall, kitchen area, and front door. I wouldn’t worry about clearing the apartment but it’s impossible to get out without stepping over and on them. I want to at least clear a route out. We toss them over the front balcony railing into the front entryways of the apartments below. Brian heaves a few times as he and Lynn cart several night runners that have been ripped open by rounds hitting them and tumbling, creating a mess. Blood and fleshy bits of night runners, some of the flesh still having hair attached, covers the tiled floor as we make our way down to the last layer of bodies. We slip a few times on the slick floor carrying the bodies out. The entry way below fills with corpses as we toss body after body over the railing.

  I look up at the shattered door of the apartment above us as Robert and I throw the last body over. I think about going up to investigate, as the sun peeks over the apartment building across from us, but decide not to as there is really nothing to be gained by going in there. With a sigh, I head back inside with Robert.

  “Pack up anything you want to bring but try and keep it to the essentials,” I tell Brian, Kelly, and Jessica.

  “Make sure you keep them on track if you don’t mind,” I ask Lynn. “I’m going outside for a breath of fresh air.”

  “Will do,” she responds.

  I head outside after we wash up and sit on a curb behind the Humvee away from the bodies and the smell. The sun is shedding its light on the parking lot over the buildings. I sit on the hard concrete feeling exhausted. With my M-4 resting between my legs and the sour scent of my own body odor assaulting my nose, I ponder the previous night. I feel like I unnecessarily put my loved ones at risk yet again. I feel like I make mistake after mistake and know I can’t afford to keep doing that. The mistakes I feel I made were bringing my kids down even though I thought I needed them to bring a 130 back. I don’t know if that was from an earnest need or just a desire to have a plane nearby. There was also a selfish part of me that wanted them close but if that were indeed true, I would have brought Nic too.

  I relive the night going over where my mistakes were and where I could have done better or done things differently. The only thing I come up with is that I should have been more forceful quieting Brian. Not shooting him as that would have made noise and is perhaps too extreme. However, his being unconscious would have kept him quiet. I resolve not to let anyone else put my loved ones in harm’s way in that manner again; or in any manner for that matter. Robert walks out and joins me, sitting by my side.

  “That guy is a real jerk,” he says.

  “Yeah, I should have done something about it before it got to the point it did,” I reply.

  “There was nothing you could have done.”

  “I could have sent him to dreamland,” I state.

  Robert chuckles, “Yeah, there’s always that option.”

  “Do I smell as bad as you?” I ask smiling.

  “Worse,” he replies with an answering smile.

  “You did a great job in there. Thanks for watching my back,” I say.

  “That was some scary shit,” he says. I notice a change in him. He is no longer shaking or referring to his being terrified but more relating to the event rather than himself. His confidence is increasing.

  “You are not shitting with that. I thought we were done for a couple of times. Thanks again for watching my back.”

  “I did too and no worries,” he says looking at the ground. Our silence continues for a few moments as we each relive portions of our experiences. Lynn walks out a short time later and joins us.

  “It was all I could do to keep from laughing when you told that guy off,” she says to Robert.

  “What? Oh, yeah that,” he says with a shy smile forming on his face once again.

  “What’s that about?” I ask.

  “He told that guy, Brian, to shut the fuck up in the middle of our firefight,” she answers.

  “What happened?” I ask.

  “Well, it was when you decided to take flying lessons with a night runner on top of you. You went sailing past the door and Brian said ‘holy shit’ or something like that. Robert looks at him and tells him to shut the fuck up. I almost lost it. If I wasn’t so worried about you and what was going on, I would have busted a gut.”

  “Really? You did that?” I ask Robert.

  “Yeah, kinda. I guess so,” he answers.

  “Too funny,” I say as we all chuckle.

  “Brian is terrified you are going to shoot him,” Lynn says after our chuckles subside.

  “I’m still on the fence on that one,” I say.

  “I’m going to check on Bri,” Robert says after a bit.

  “Okay. We need to go pretty soon,” I say as he gets up and heads inside.

  I look over at Lynn and smile. “Take a walk with me?” I ask once Robert gets out of earshot.

  “Mmmm hmmm,” she answers returning my smile.

  Carrying our weapons casually but still alert, we stroll down the lot. We find a place behind a parked van out of sight.

  “As much as I hate to say this, Jack, we’ll have to make this quick,” Lynn says.

  “I know,” I say. “Being quick will be no problem at all.”

  “We’re going to have to find some privacy for a much longer time,” I say a short time later as pick up our M-4’s.

  “Yes we are,” she replies. We walk back to the apartment complex hand in hand.

  Brian, Kelly, and Jessica finish packing their bags. It looks like they packed the entire apartment. “This is packing the essentials?” I ask eyeing the vast amount of baggage. Not that I would have done much different I guess. Kelly merely shrugs a response as we throw the gear in the back of the Humvee. The interior is packed as we climb in. I have Robert drive once again and we pull out of the apartments with the sun climbing into another warm, clear day.

  The drive to the airport is conducted mostly in silence with our only real conversation being which road and exit to take. We arrive at the open gates of the Air Force National Guard Base and
drive to the flightline. F-15’s sit in rows in the center of the tarmac with others parked in large, open hangars. Off to the side on the edge of the ramp, two C-130’s sit side-by-side. We pull up behind them and exit.

  Opening the crew door of one, I check that the inside is clear. The interior has a musty aroma mixed with the smell of oil, jet fuel, and the ground in odors of years of use. I walk into the cockpit and turn on the battery. The gyros begin spooling up and the total fuel gauge reads about three-quarters full. There aren’t any external fuel tanks installed on this one so their tanks read empty. The fighter squadrons have the 130’s to carry their gear for their deployments and exercises. Satisfied that all is in order and this one appears in good shape, I walk to the rear and drop the ramp.

  “Do you want us to carry the gear inside?” Robert asks after I relate that this one seems to be in working order.

  “No, we’ll just drive the Humvee in and tie it down,” I answer. We edge the vehicle in and secure it to the cargo floor.

  “This one should be almost identical to the other one,” I say to Bri and Robert as we take our familiar seats.

  “Okay, Dad,” Bri says adjusting her straps.

  Lynn straps in at the nav seat while the others find seats on the bunk adjacent to the rear bulkhead. I find a checklist sitting on the throttle quadrant as we proceed through the checklists in a familiar fashion. Brian, Kelly, and Jessica look decidedly anxious as they watch Bri handle the fuel and electrical systems. They glance nervously from her to Robert sitting in the co-pilot seat as we run through the start-up procedures like old hands. The engines come to life as we start one after another; the throaty roar saturates the cockpit. We don’t have helmets so the sound fills our ears in full force. We’ll have to shout to one another as we don’t have mics or headsets either. We taxi out and take off into the noon sun and turn north staying down low and follow I-5 northbound. As we turn to the north, leaving the dead city behind us, my thoughts go out to those who remained at Cabela’s and wonder how they are doing.

  An Angel Falls

  Nicole stands in the parking lot and watches her dad, Robert, Lynn, and Bri leave the parking lot and disappear over the hill. She wanted to go with them but understands why her dad wanted her to stay. With a sigh, she turns to see soldiers begin to cart the bodies out of the outdoor store. They pile them in a back corner of the lot. There is activity at the front doors as Bannerman and other soldiers begin to install the security doors they fetched from the shop. The sun is warm on her shoulders and she fidgets in the dark fatigues, trying to become accustomed to the fit and style. Feeling a little useless at the moment, she walks over to the transport trucks with her grandmother and Michelle and helps unload supplies.