Payback Is a Mutha

by Wahida Clark

  “Excuse me?”

  Pop! She punched him once again in the mouth while holding Tameerah.

  “Do you love her?”

  “No Nyla. I love you and only you. And she’s lying about being pregnant. I’m sorry Nyla. I had the opportunity, and I took advantage of it. I fucked her but I know she ain’t pregnant. It was very irresponsible of me and I’m sorry. I fucked up.”

  “You damned right you fucked up! You don’t know what that bitch got! And look at you. You still lying! One thing for sure, two for certain, you betta get that bitch to get rid of it because I know she’s pregnant Forever. Do you understand me?” He nodded his head yes. “Answer me!” she yelled as if he was a child in serious trouble.

  “I understand Nyla, damn,” he conceded. He was cold-busted.

  “Now as far as I’m concerned the bitch is expendable. Am I right?”

  Damn. My baby is cold-blooded. She shocked the shit out of him. He immediately knew what she was getting at.

  “Am I right?” She snapped.

  “Yeah baby. You know the bitch is expendable. I was just using her to get that money. You know we gotta eat.”

  “Well good. Because she is now your get outta jail free card. When is the next drop?”

  “Damn Nyla, you gonna turn me into a snitch?”

  “Nigga you just said the hoe was expendable. You ain’t the one snitchin’, I am. Now when is the next drop?” she snapped.

  He got quiet because he had to mull this shit over in his mind. I got less than two more years to do, or if Nyla has her way I’ll be out in less than a year but I’ll be labeled a snitch.

  “Forever, it’s either me and your child or her.”

  “Baby you know what I say about snitching. It’s gotta be something else we can do.”

  “Nigga I already told you what the deal is. And I’m not going to say it again. It’s either me or her. You know what? Fuck it! If it was all about me, I wouldn’t have to convince your ass! I promise you. This will be the last you ever see your daughter if you don’t get your mind right and act like you know. You can think you’re the HNIC if you want. But truth be told I’m runnin’ shit. And don’t you forget it! C’mon Tameerah.”

  He sat there dumbfounded as he watched his wife drag their child out of the visiting hall. “Fuck!” He leaned back and closed his eyes.

  “Thompson! Let’s go! You don’t have a visitor out here,” the lieutenant yelled at him.

  I need to go to the hole because I swear if I see Shan, I’ma bust her in her ass. She didn’t have to tell Nyla, scandalous bitch!

  25

  THE END

  “How could I be so fucking stupid? This muthafuckin’ nigga has been playing me from day one. I can’t believe this shit!” Just the thought was making Shan gag. “The bitch even knew the amount of money I was begging the nigga for. How could I be so fucking dumb?” Shan had already decided that she wasn’t shedding another tear. She got played big time. So what? It wasn’t the first time and damn sure wouldn’t be the last. Life goes on.

  Even though Peanut had a house with Keke he kept an apartment on the side. He wanted Shan to go by and move out the valuable stuff and put it in storage. He didn’t want to take chances and get his shit stolen.

  “Peanut!” She sighed as she looked around the apartment. “How the fuck? You know what?” she said to the movers, “Take everything out!” I’m not sorting through all of this shit!”

  “All right ma’am,” the Mexican mover with Jose on his name tag responded.

  “I don’t know what’s valuable to him or not and I don’t want to hear his mouth. Take it all,” she repeated.

  Five and a half hours later everything was gone except for the dishes in the kitchen cabinet. As she began packing the top shelf, she came across a black cosmetic bag. “I know this nigga ain’t got no dope in here,” she snapped as she zipped it open. Her eyes almost popped outta their sockets as she ran her hands over the stacks of hundred dollar bills. “One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen! Thirteen damn thousand dollars! I’ve been out here doin’ Lord knows what to get money and this fool got money all along! That stupid muthafucker! All the trouble he got me into!” Shan was pissed off but at the same time happy that she could now get her brother out. She couldn’t believe it.

  After Brianna was raped and told that she was HIV positive she was devastated. She began chain smoking, having nightmares, breaking out in bouts of hives, becoming a nervous wreck. She kept thinking that someone was at the door, severe paranoia was creeping in. The idea of suicide was becoming more and more appealing to her. Shadee had went out of town again and was calling her, blowin’ up her voice mail. She had to get her mind together before speaking with him. It has been almost two weeks since their engagement and her diagnosis. She was trying to figure out one: who were the men who raped her and two: if Shadee was infected and had purposely infected her.

  She had to know for sure. If she could find out definite facts, payback would be priority and suicide would have to wait.

  The next time the phone rang and his name popped up on the Caller ID she forced herself to answer.

  “Hello.”

  “Damn B. Where you was at? I’ve been callin’ and callin’! What the fuck was you doin’?”

  “I was right here Sha.”

  “Then why you wasn’t answering the phone?”

  “I need to talk to you. When are you coming home?” Her heart beat rapidly.

  “Home? Bitch my home ain’t with you!”

  That caught Brianna off-guard. She was stunned, thinking something was the matter with her hearing. “What did you say?”

  “Everybody was telling me that you wasn’t shit and that you can’t turn a hoe into a housewife. I didn’t listen. But when you set me up, that’s when my eyes opened. Payback is a mutha! But you see B, what you ain’t know was that I ain’t the one! You set up the wrong nigga. Why I say that? Because my payback is slow and deadly. BeeaaTCH! You been fuckin’ an HIV-positive nigga! Go get tested hoe!” He turned off his phone.

  Brianna dropped to her knees gagging and throwing up all over the carpet. She couldn’t believe that Shadee would purposely do that to her.

  After several days of drinking and smoking crack, Brianna hyped herself up to do what she had to do. Nick was gone. So that plan was shot down. Shadee played her big-time. So did Peanut. Shan, her only real family, was history. So was Peanut. She had a locksmith open the safe that Shadee had at her apartment, emptied out the contents and went looking for Shadee. After the fourth day he showed up at his apartment with Doc and Teraney. After about an hour they all came out and got into separate cars. Brianna started up her car and followed Shadee to what she recognized as Janay’s house. She watched him go inside. She sat in her Lexus suckin’ on that glass dick, for about two hours. After it was all gone and she was so geeked up she jumped outta the car and banged on Janay’s door.

  When Janay opened the door Brianna pushed it open, damn near knocking Janay over, and ran over to Shadee. He was sitting on the couch wondering why Brianna was standing over him.

  “What the fuck is your problem Brianna?” As soon as he stood up Brianna pulled out the burner that she took out of his safe. “How’d you get that girl?”

  “Nigga I’m sending you to meet your maker.” She aimed the burner at him.

  “Not in my house bitch. Take y’all’s beef outta here Shadee,” screamed Janay.

  “Shut up hoe!” she yelled, not taking her eyes off of Shadee. “I was going to make things right by you Shadee. I set you up but at least you are not dead. But you turn around and pull this shit! Play me like I’m some goddamned board game! You even had the nerve to propose to me?” Her hands were trembling as well as her voice.

  “He did what!” Janay screamed. “You did what nigga?” She was now all up in his face. Disregarding the fact that Brianna was standing there with a gun.

  “Janay baby, listen.”


  “Don’t Janay baby me!” She started crying. “What have I ever done to you Shadee, but be a goddamned good ass woman and mother to our son?”

  “Bitch move the fuck outta my way,” Brianna warned.

  Janay turned around looking like a madwoman. “You in my muthafuckin’ house bitch. Let’s not forget that. That gun you’re holding does not scare me. If you was going to use the muthafucker you would have done so minutes ago.” Then she turned back to Shadee.

  “Baby I was only pla–”

  “Shut the fuck up nigga!” She picked up her crystal vase and smashed him in the head. He screamed out. “Let me talk! I’ve been with your sorry, no good, homosexual ass for how long? Being faithful and you ask this gold diggin’ bitch to marry you?”

  “Baby fuck her. It wasn’t even like that! Listen…I—”

  She gave him the hand. “You know what? This is the last fuckin’ straw! This is the straw that broke this goddamn camel’s back! I was willing to work with your HIV infected, homosexual, faggot, wanna be a thug ass. I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking. Thanks bitch, for snapping me outta my madness,” she said to Brianna. “I’m outta here. Shoot that fuckin’ punk! I’ll send you the bill!” And she headed towards the door hoping that Brianna did kill his ass. That way her secret would go with him to his grave.

  “Janay call the cops on this crazy bitch! She lyin!” he yelled after her.

  She moved closer to him looking even crazier. “Oh, so I’m lying now?” Pop! She aimed at his dick but shot his thigh instead.

  “Oh, shit girl! C’mon, Brianna.” He tried lunging at her.

  “Get your ass back nigga. Sit, doggie!”

  “Brianna stop playing!” He was pressing his thigh in an attempt to stop the bleeding.

  “Nigga I ain’t playin’. I’m just wondering how I can make your ass suffer. Pop! She shot him in the other thigh, making sure he couldn’t go anywhere.

  “Oww! Brianna please. We can arrange something, I got money. How much you need?” he pleaded. “Aww fuck, this hurts Brianna.”

  “What good is money going to do now?” She picked up the phone. “I know what. Since you like getting fucked in the ass I got something for you. You remember Big Freddie right?”

  He was looking at her trying to figure out who he was.

  “Nigga don’t look crazy. Freddie—the one with them big ass dogs. He be puttin’ on them freak shows with them. Oh yeah. Them big ass dogs will love fuckin’ you in the ass. Better yet, he can videotape you sucking the dogs’ dicks and getting fucked in the ass. I could make mad loot off that shit.” Brianna smirked as she dialed Freddie’s number even though he was already on his way.

  “Brianna hold up, wait a minute.”

  “Naw, it’s too late for that, beaatch! Ain’t that what you told me over the phone?”

  “Hello.”

  “Brianna,” he screamed. “I got some info about your girl Shan.”

  This caught Brianna by surprise. “What did you say?”

  “I got some info about your girl Shan.”

  “What kind of info?”

  “Hang up the phone.” When he saw her hesitating he yelled, “Now B. Hang up the fuckin’ phone. This is important.” As soon as she hung it up he ordered, “Put the gun down.”

  “No Sha. I am not putting down my damn gun. Now you want the next bullet in your dick, or what? That’s what’s going to happen if you don’t say what you got to say.”

  “You not gonna get the dogs over right?”

  “Nigga what about Shan?”

  “She dropping a package off at the prison tomorrow and it’s a setup.”

  “Package? What kind of package?”

  “What the fuck you think Brianna? Dope!”

  Brianna couldn’t believe her ears. Her girl moving dope? Aw, hell, no! Not Miss Goody Two-Shoes. “How do you know this, Sha?”

  “What kind of question is that? You obviously don’t know who I am.”

  Just then they heard dogs barking. Shadee panicked. “Brianna baby, come on. Don’t do this. We go too far back.” He was sniveling and groveling like a bitch, as she was grinning and backing up towards the door. She opened the door and in came two huge animals with Freddie and his boys, Gino and Wayne Wayne, right behind him. Gino was the cameraman and he was carrying the equipment. Damn, I wonder if a dog can get infected.

  “Yo Freddie, don’t listen to that bitch; she crazy man,” Shadee was begging. He had seen the dogs in action before with crack hoes; so he knew they could fuck humans.

  “Yo, Gino…”

  Smack! “Shut up, nigga.” She grabbed a handkerchief from Freddie and stuffed his mouth. “Set that shit up right here,” she yelled over the barking dogs. I can’t watch this shit. I’ma be in my car.” She held out her hand and Freddie gave her three eight balls and she skipped out to her car. As far as he was concerned, big ballin’ Shadee, on tape suckin’ off a dog was worth far more than three eight balls.

  Two hours later and geeked the fuck out, she heard barking and they were coming out. Freddie handed her another eight ball as a bonus and they got in their rides and left. When Brianna went into the living room she had to hold her nose. It looked and smelled like a disaster area.

  Shadee was on the floor looking half dead. Blood and shit was all over his naked body and she kicked him to see if he was alive. He barely whispered, “Get me an ambulance.”

  “You don’t need shit nigga, but a body bag!” Boom! Boom! Boom! She put three to his head. “I ain’t touch shit but this phone.” She used her blouse to clean it off and ran out to find Shan.

  “Who is it?”

  “It’s me.” Brianna’s heart thumped as she anticipated her girl opening the door. “Please Shan. Open the door.”

  Shan was on the other side with one hand on the chain, the other on the doorknob and her forehead resting on the door. Feelings of anger, hatred, compassion and flashes of their years of being together were all fighting for her attention. Brianna was on the other side with her ear to the door. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife but they could both feel each other’s presence.

  Finally Shan cracked the door. “What do you want?” she asked, not looking at her used-to-be best friend.

  Brianna was trying to get a look at Shan. “This is important. I can’t say it out here. It’s about your drop tomorrow.”

  “What?” Shan had to have heard her wrong.

  “It’s about your drop tomorrow.”

  Shan put her hand over her heart wondering how in the hell Brianna knew about her drop. She closed the door, took the chain off and held it open. When Brianna walked in Shan did a double take. “What the fuck happened to you?” she blurted out as she looked at her friend from head to toe in horror. Brianna just stood there frozen, tears running down her cheeks. Shan noticed that her hair was so dry-looking, it was lifeless and the ends were so raggedy. Her skin color was ashen, her eyes were swollen. Her nails were obviously being bitten and her front tooth was gone. She looked as if she hadn’t had a bath in days and the sweats she had on were hanging off her ass.

  “Brianna what happened to you?”

  “I don’t know Shan. I couldn’t even begin to start explaining. It’s not important. I’m just glad to see you. Glad to be here. I miss this place so much. I’m not the same no more Shan. Nothing’s the same. Anyway I’m not important. Shadee said tomorrow when you go to make that drop, the po-po are gonna be waiting on you. I just wanted to warn you. It’s the least I can do. And for whatever it’s worth, I’m sorry.” Brianna hurriedly left, leaving Shan standing there dumbfounded and looking as if she had just seen a ghost.

  Brianna got in her car and drove home. She sat in front of her house talking out loud. “What’s the use? I have nobody. I fucked up my life, Shan’s, and Peanut’s. Fuck dying slow.” She put the gun to her head and blew her brains out.

  Nyla was sitting on pins and needles as she watched every car pass her except for Shan’s. She had used all of h
er connections to put this show on. She couldn’t do this jail thing another day. She couldn’t. The fact that this happened was both a blessing and a trial. She now knew the true meaning of watching what you pray for. She spent countless nights lying in her bed all alone wanting so bad for Forever to come walking through the door. She would end up masturbating, crying herself to sleep and awaking with a terrible headache. Her contact at the DA’s office promised her that this drop would get her man home in a few months. She had been so excited that she had been planning for it every day. The downside was Forever fucking this hoe, unprotected, and now she was carrying her husband’s seed. Did he love her? Would she keep the baby? Would the bitch and the baby be in their lives forever? “Damn you Forever!” She banged on the steering wheel as she cried until she felt dizzy.

  Here it was damn near seven hours later and Nyla had tears in her eyes as she headed back to her home. All she wanted more than anything else in the world was for her man to come home. She felt defeated and all of her effort was in vain. She had been parked several blocks down from the prison, anxiously waiting to see the look on Shan’s face as she drove by in handcuffs.

  But all she got after the longest wait of her life was a phone call. Her contact in the DA’s office told her that Shan never showed up. She had called in and accepted an offer to work at the new FCI in Victorville, California.

  As for Shan, the last pick up she did for Forever was just that; the last pick up. She turned that package over to her brother who had come home the night before. That was his come-up. They stayed up all night packing and saying good-bye. Peanut didn’t want her to go but she had to get a new start.

  Shan hugged her big brother for the last time. She jumped into her ride and headed off. If he knew of the stop that she was about to make he would kill her himself.

  When she pulled up on Brianna’s block, police were everywhere; also an ambulance. She slowed down, rolled her window down and asked a young girl what was up.