Anticipation

by Terri Breneman

  Toni jotted down a few notes before ending the call. She noticed Boggs looking around her office and then she wiped her hands on her pants. Toni wondered what Boggs was thinking and if she could tell how attracted she was to her. Jeez. She felt like a teenager, jittery and a little scared. Toni ended her call.

  “Hi, Boggs. Sorry I was on the phone. Thanks for setting up this meeting. I have a printout of all my cases. I guess we should just start at the top.” Hmm. Not bad, Toni thought. Very professional. Maybe she could make it through this after all.

  Boggs agreed and for the next fifteen minutes they discussed the cases and took notes. Boggs wrote down the names of various witnesses to locate. The next file was Dexter Crown’s.

  “I guess there isn’t much to do on this one. Carol Bledsoe thinks he’ll take the life sentences.” Toni had the file in the center of her desk.

  “I guess you didn’t have to use that fax after all.” Boggs glanced 41

  up from her notes and looked at Toni. Their eyes met and time seemed to freeze.

  Toni couldn’t speak. She felt a powerful connection that she didn’t quite understand. Several seconds passed before Toni was able to look away. She cleared her throat and continued as though nothing had happened. For the next hour, Boggs and Toni pored over the files. Toni refused to allow herself to think about what had happened. They finished at 4:30.

  Boggs leaned back in her chair and stretched. “Well, I guess that about does it.” She made no move to leave.

  “Guess so,” Toni replied. She didn’t want Boggs to leave. Not just yet.

  Both women’s attention turned to the hall outside Toni’s office.

  The voice of the mail clerk, Brittany, could be heard clearly. No one could mistake that voice. It squeaked. Brittany was a very nice young woman, but she had not been blessed with the brain of a rocket scientist. She had been working in the building for more than two years but continued to get lost. No one seemed to know her job description, except that she delivered mail. Oh, yes, she did have one other task. She was in charge of decorations for the various holidays. Evidently Brittany was talking to one of the secretaries who worked for the prosecutors.

  “Where do you want me to put these at?” she squeaked to the other woman.

  “Asshole,” Toni murmured.

  Boggs looked at Toni with disbelief. “What did you just say?” Toni giggled, embarrassed to discover she had said that out loud. “Oh, Boggs.” She laughed. “It’s not what you think.” She continued to laugh while Boggs just stared. Toni regained composure and said, “It’s an old joke. Remember in school we were always taught never to end a sentence with a preposition?” Boggs nodded. She clearly had no idea what Toni was talking about.

  Toni could hardly contain herself. “Okay. Well, Brittany just said, ‘Where do you want me to put these at?’ So, because you 42

  should never end a sentence with a preposition, I added ‘asshole.’

  There, better grammar for all.” With that said, both Toni and Boggs burst into laughter.

  They were still laughing when Brittany knocked on Toni’s door.

  Toni waved her into her office. “Here are your decorations,” she squeaked proudly. She waved good-bye and left. Toni could hear her five-inch heels click down the hall.

  She looked at her “decorations.” They consisted of a cardboard ghost measuring four inches high and a small plastic pumpkin. She looked at Boggs with disbelief.

  “Wow.” Toni feigned awe. “These are wonderful. I never dreamed my position here warranted such incredible fringe bene-fits.”

  “Unbelievable, isn’t it?” Boggs was struggling to keep a straight face. “You should see what she brings you for Thanksgiving.” Finally, she couldn’t hold it in any longer. Both laughed so hard, tears streamed from their eyes.

  Toni attempted to be serious again. “Brittany is really sweet, but every time I hear that voice, I have this awful image. I know this is really tacky, but I imagine her living in a trailer, listening to old country music and wearing a tube top. Isn’t that terrible of me?”

  Boggs remained silent for a moment. Toni thought she might have offended her and was just about to apologize when Boggs began laughing so hard, Toni couldn’t understand what she was saying. After several minutes, Boggs said, “She does! I swear she does!”

  “She does what?”

  Boggs was beginning to laugh again. “Brittany really does live in a trailer, loves country music and, get this, she wore a tube top to the department picnic last year!”

  “No.” Toni gasped. Both she and Boggs covered their mouths with their hands and laughed some more. “God, we’re bad. We are going straight to hell!” Toni stopped and looked at Boggs. That was all it took. More laughter filled the office.

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  When she and Boggs recovered, they noticed Sam standing in the doorway and gripping his Diet Coke. He had a huge grin on his face. “Must be good,” he said. “Do you want to let me in on it or did you have to ‘be there’?”

  “Sorry, Sam,” Boggs said. “I guess you just had to be here.

  What brings you down here?”

  “Well,” he replied, “I just came to drop off a map to the counselor here. She has graciously accepted an invitation to the Halloween party.” As he handed the map to Toni, he pointed to the “decorations” on her desk. “I see you’ve received your allotted Halloween decor. Pretty tacky, huh? It almost gives Halloween a bad name.”

  Boggs chuckled and turned toward Toni. “Sam and Betty are Halloween fanatics,” she explained. “They have the most incredible decorations and continue to outdo themselves every year. They do Halloween like most folks do Christmas. So, you’re going to be there?”

  “Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Toni replied. The three began exchanging ideas on party games, decorations and food, Sam’s favorite topic. Several minutes passed before he looked at his watch. “Gosh, it’s after five. I’ve got to head home. It’s my turn to cook. I’m making lasagne. With Betty’s leftover spaghetti sauce, it turns out great. Would either of you like to join us for dinner?”

  “Sorry, Sam.” Toni sighed. “It sounds really delicious, but I already have plans.”

  “Me too, Sam,” Boggs said. “Maybe you could bring some leftovers in for lunch tomorrow?”

  Sam shrugged and took a long swallow of Diet Coke. “Maybe.” He grinned. “If you’re lucky. See you two tomorrow.” With that he was out the door.

  “Well, I guess I better head home too,” Boggs said. “Thanks for a really enjoyable afternoon. Who knew going over cases could be so much fun.”

  “You are very welcome,” Toni replied. “It felt good to laugh. I don’t think I’ve laughed that hard in a long, long time. Thanks, Boggs. I forgot how good it can make a person feel.” 44

  Boggs stood, and Toni looked directly into her eyes. Neither said another word. They didn’t have to say anything. Boggs nodded and left.

  Toni left her office shortly after Sam and Boggs. She opened the door to her apartment and was met, as usual, by Mr. Rupert.

  “Hiya, big boy! How was your day?”

  Mr. Rupert replied enthusiastically, as if he sensed the happiness in her voice. She chuckled. It had been a long time.

  She began telling him about the events of the day while filling his dish. She then went upstairs and changed into her sweats. As she hung her suit in the closet, she smiled. She’d make this her lucky suit from now on.

  She went back downstairs and plopped down on the couch. Mr.

  Rupert joined her and together they went through the day’s mail.

  There was a lot of mail today. Toni separated it into three piles.

  The first one was for bills. Yuck. The second was personal stuff or professional junk. There was also a letter from Sandy, an old colleague from her psychotherapy days. The third pile belonged to Mr. Rupert. It contained mostly catalogs and junk mail, but he didn’t mind. Once placed in front of him, he dove in headfirst, scattering envelopes everyw
here. He just loved getting mail.

  Toni glanced at her watch. “Jake will be here any minute.” She had just finished picking up the mail when the doorbell rang. “Hi, handsome,” she said as she opened the door.

  Jake glided inside, one arm gripping a huge bag of Chinese food and the other carrying a magnum of wine.

  “My gosh, Jake. How much food did you bring? Are you planning on sharing this with the whole complex?” He laughed. “No. Just us. I couldn’t decide what I was hungry for, so I got a little of everything.”

  While Toni got out plates and napkins, Jake began filling her in on details of the upcoming move. He was so animated and happy, she couldn’t help but grin. In all the years she had known him, he had never seemed so genuinely content. They drank white wine and nibbled food. After nearly two hours, Jake was finally winding down.

  45

  “You know, it feels so good to tell someone how I feel.” He sighed. “I have to keep pretty closed-mouthed at work. I have to keep up my reputation as an eligible bachelor, you know.” He winked. “Well, now that I have monopolized the entire night, why don’t you tell me about this woman you’re interested in?” Toni leaned back on the couch and put her feet on the coffee table. Mr. Rupert curled up next to her and purred contentedly.

  “There’s nothing to tell,” she answered truthfully. “My investigator—her name is Boggs, is, well, very nice. But that’s all there is.

  She is not interested in me. I saw her the other night with her boyfriend. I was disappointed at first, but not now. We talked today, about work of course, and, I don’t know, it’s hard to describe. I guess I felt some sort of bond. I think we can become friends. Maybe even good friends.”

  “So, what are you going to do?” he asked. “I mean about your dateless situation. You can’t spend every night working. And on the weekends, you can’t possibly look forward to watching Cops with Mr. Rupert.”

  “Come on, Jake,” she protested. “It’s not that dramatic. I date.”

  “Hell, Toni,” he said, “you can’t fool me. When was the last time you went on a real date?”

  She immediately opened her mouth to respond but said nothing. My God, she thought. Had it been that long? The more she thought about it, the wider Jake’s grin became.

  “Okay, you win. It was sometime this past summer. So what’s your point?” She was beginning to laugh. She had to admit that her personal life was somewhat comical. At least, she would rather think that than the alternative.

  “Well.” He was getting that matchmaker look in his eye.

  “There is a very interesting woman who just started working for us. She’s attractive, brown hair, and she has a great sense of humor.

  She would be perfect for you. Why don’t you let me try and set something up?”

  Toni moaned. “Jake, you know I hate setups. They always end in disaster. Anyway, what makes you think she’d be interested?” 46

  He rubbed his hands together as though he was plotting a devious crime. “Just leave the details to me, and leave Friday night open.”

  With that remark, he announced that he had to head for home.

  She congratulated him for the hundredth time about his good for-tune and they said good night.

  After Jake left, Toni busied herself cleaning up. There was a ton of food left. No need to cook for a while. She poured herself another glass of wine, sat down on the couch and put her feet on the table.

  She gently scratched Mr. Rupert’s head and thought about the dream she’d had about Boggs. It had seemed so real, so vivid. Oh, how she longed to have someone in her life who truly understood her. Someone who knew why she smiled, why she cried. Someone with whom she could share her life, her hopes, her dreams. Was there such a person for her? Was she looking for someone who didn’t exist? She thought about the exchange she’d had with Boggs earlier that day. Maybe a real friend was what she was looking for.

  A lover never seemed to fit that bill. There were friends and there were lovers. Never both. With that realization, Toni went to bed.

  47

  CHAPTER 7

  Toni sat at her desk and stretched. Boy, what a week this had been. She had completed more paperwork in a week, it seemed, than she had in a whole semester of law school, although the pile in her in box was only slightly smaller than when she began. She had just reached for another request for discovery from the pile when the phone rang.

  “Hiya, crime fighter,” Jake said. “You didn’t forget about the big date tonight, did you?”

  “Well, to tell you the truth,” Toni replied, “I sure did. It’s probably a good thing, too, or I would have found a way to back out. I hate blind dates.”

  “Listen,” he suggested, “just think of it as a few fun people going out for the evening. Since I thought you’d back down if it were just the two of you, Bob and I will go along. Your date is Linda. We’ll leave from here and pick up Bob, then we’ll swing by and pick you up around seven, okay?”

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  Toni smiled. Maybe this wouldn’t be such a bad evening. She really liked Bob. He had been a childhood friend of Jake’s and they had gone out often. He had a great sense of humor and they always had a good time.

  “Okay, Jake,” she said. “Where are we going? So I have an idea on what to wear.”

  “We’ll grab dinner at Winston’s, then we’re going to the new club in town. Gotta run.” Without even saying good-bye, Jake disconnected.

  Toni finished the next few requests on her desk, glanced at her watch and decided to finish up for the day. It was past 5:30 and she still had to get home, feed Mr. Rupert, shower and get dressed.

  When she reached her apartment, she was in a pretty good mood. It was a gorgeous fall evening, and she was about to go out on the town. Although she was not what she considered “really excited” about the evening, she was sure it would be enjoyable.

  By 6:40 she was dressed and ready to go. Amazingly, it had taken her only a few minutes to pick her outfit for the evening. She chose her favorite jeans, a rust-colored sweater and her brown suede bomber jacket. She turned on some upbeat music and settled on the couch to wait for Jake, Bob and Linda to arrive. Mr. Rupert joined her.

  “Well, boy, this is the big night. I am finally going out on a

  ‘date’! I know you aren’t thrilled, but be nice when she gets here, okay? Maybe this will lead to a second date, and I want to make a good impression.” She paused. “You know something? I don’t even feel nervous. I suppose I should be worried about how things will go, but I’m not.” She was more nervous about seeing Boggs around the office.

  Mr. Rupert was about to respond when the doorbell rang. Toni shrugged at Mr. Rupert and got up to answer. When she opened the door, her heart began pounding and her jaw dropped.

  “Hi, Toni,” Boggs stammered. “Sorry to just pop in on you like this, but I have something I thought you might want. Carol Bledsoe filed these motions just before close of business today and 49

  I thought, well, you might want to take a look over the weekend. I was in the clerk’s office when she filed and, um, well, I know you like to keep up on things.”

  Boggs was clearly doing her best to act casual and failing miserably. There had been no justifiable reason for her to deliver these motions and memos, Toni thought, but she appreciated the gesture. Did this mean something? Both women smiled at each other.

  “Gosh, that was awfully nice of you,” Toni said. “I mean, for you to go out of your way and all. I’m really glad you did. This will give me more time to look them over and decide what I want to do.

  This is really great. Thanks.”

  Another brilliant dialogue! God, why was she so tongue-tied around Boggs? She thought she’d gotten past this. What should she do now? On the outside she tried to appear cool, calm and collected.

  Was she stammering? Did she look like a complete fool standing there? Her cheeks were burning. Damn it Toni, say something!

  “Um, uh, would you like to come in?” Smooth
, Toni, very smooth.

  Wait, had she replaced the books and the pictures or were they still in the closet? No, they were still in there. Okay.

  Before Boggs could respond to that poor excuse for an invitation, Mr. Rupert was heading for the front door. Both Toni and Boggs instinctively reached for the fleeing feline and promptly bumped heads.

  “Oh, my gosh, are you okay?” Toni asked.

  Boggs was rubbing her head and grinning. Both women immediately burst into laughter. It took almost a minute before Toni realized that Mr. Rupert was nowhere to be seen.

  “Mr. Rupert. He’s gone!” Toni pushed past Boggs and ran into the courtyard. No sign of him. Boggs headed for the parking lot.

  “He’s not over here,” she yelled. Toni was returning from the courtyard when she met Boggs at the front door. “He couldn’t have gone too far, Toni. Let’s circle the building.” Toni was about to close her still-open front door when she spotted him. There he was, sitting on the couch, washing his face.

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  She looked at Boggs, motioned toward Mr. Rupert and grinned.

  “The little shit. He never left.”

  Boggs followed Toni into the apartment and shut the door.

  Toni sat on the coffee table and began lecturing the big furball.

  “You scared me to death, young man. You know you aren’t supposed to go outside without your leash. You are grounded! That means no TV.”

  She scratched behind his ears, glanced over at Boggs and smiled. Boggs met her eyes and began grinning again.

  “Gosh, Boggs. I’m really sorry about this. Here you go out of your way to bring me those motions and end up on a wild cat chase. I’m sorry.” Toni rubbed her forehead. “How’s your head, by the way?” she asked.

  Boggs gingerly touched the side of her head. She then extended both arms to her sides, closed her eyes and touched one finger to her nose. She opened her eyes and looked at Toni. With incredible seriousness she said, “There seems to be no permanent damage. I believe I can continue to lead a normal and productive life.” The two of them laughed. Even Mr. Rupert seemed amused, or at least he put on a good show.