by Dustin Brady
The ring smacked the gorilla’s forehead, slid down its nose and fell onto the bottle below.
CLANG!
The worker spun around to see his first ring toss winner in three weeks.
“Winner winner chicken dinner!” Lenny yelled.
“You can’t lean over the counter,” the worker said.
“I didn’t!” Jared yelped. “I hit it fair and square!”
“You leaned over the counter. I saw you.”
“He didn’t, I was a witness!” Lenny said.
“I don’t think he did,” the teenage girl piped up.
The carnival worker turned to her and glared.
“It’s OK,” Jared said as he took another ring. He aimed again, and again he hit the gorilla between the eyes.
CLANG!
The ring fell onto the same bottle and rested on top of his first ring. Ring toss guy looked like he might be sick.
“I’ll take the green gorilla!” Jared said.
The worker handed him the gorilla. “Nice shot kid. Have a good day.” He started to reach for Jared’s bucket of rings.
“Wait, I’ve got 48 more rings!”
The guy looked like he might argue, but instead shrugged and turned away.
“Hey,” the teenage guy yelled. “I want to try this game!” While the teenager bought his rings, Jared went back to the magic eight ball.
“What next?”
SKIP THE RING OFF THE COUNTER
Jared took a step back and aimed at the counter like he was skipping rocks in a pond. This was a bit more difficult — he threw the first two rings a little wobbly, and they missed the mark entirely. But on the third try…
CLANG!
Ring toss guy slowly turned around.
Jared grinned. “I’ll take the dog.”
The worker handed him the dog and shooed him away. “You’re done here, kid.”
Lenny stepped up. “Can I try?”
“Five tickets.”
“But we’ve got 45 rings left!”
“Five tickets.”
Lenny harrumphed and handed over five crumpled tickets. Ring toss guy handed back Jared’s bucket.
“Don’t I get five more rings?!”
The worker ignored him and turned away. Lenny turned to Jared. “What do I do?”
Jared didn’t answer right away. He was trying to figure out if the eight ball was just messing with him now.
“Hello,” Lenny said. “I want to win a SpongeBob SquarePants big enough to be a mattress.”
“Uh, it says to throw it at his head.”
“Whose head? His head?!” Lenny pointed at the worker who was angrily talking on the phone with his back turned. Jared nodded.
Lenny smiled. “With pleasure.” He took aim and threw the ring like a Frisbee at the baldest spot on the guy’s head.
CLANG!
The guy spun around with steam coming out of his ears. “WHAT THE…”
Lenny and Jared stood pointing to the ring that had bounced from the guy’s head onto a nearby bottle.
“BOTH OF YOU! OUT!”
“But we…”
“OUT!”
Jared and Lenny grabbed their prizes and shuffled away. On his way past the couple, Jared handed his dog to the girl.
“Awwwwww, really?!” the girl squealed and hugged Jared. He turned a little red and smiled at Lenny. Before the worker could jump over the counter and chase them away, Jared whispered something into the teenage guy’s ear. He winked and walked away. A few seconds later, Jared heard the…
CLANG!
…Of another winner and the…
“AHHHHHHH!”
…Of a carnival worker losing his mind.
CHAPTER FOUR
Mickey Mouse
Jared rolled over in bed and looked at the magic eight ball tucked into the covers next to him. “Was that all a dream?”
NOPE
Wow. What a night. After ring toss, Jared and Lenny won big at darts and the fishing game and that one where someone tries to guess your birthday. They ate pizza and giant turkey legs and so many elephant ears that Jared felt like he was going to puke. Then they rode the Zipper until Lenny did puke. They wrapped up the night by winning even more midway games. By the time they were ready to leave, they had put together a mountain of prizes so big that the local paper took a picture of them. Jared couldn’t risk alerting his parents by bringing his prizes home, so now the shed behind Lenny’s house was bursting with oversized stuffed animals.
Jared stretched and jumped out of bed. Today was going to be a great day. He had big plans for school. First he called Lenny.
“Mrff?”
“Hey Lenny! How good of a mattress was SpongeBob?”
“Mmmmmfffff.”
“Cool. Hey, you know that enormous octopus we won? Can you bring it to school today? Oh, and can you get there early?”
“Mmmhmmf.”
“Thanks buddy!”
Now to put things in motion. He turned to the magic eight ball. “What’s Kodey’s locker combination?”
An hour and a half later, Lenny joined Jared in front of the lockers. “You really think this is going to work?”
“Come on, I ran it all past the eight ball. Did you turn that note into the office?”
“Yeah I did. But, hey, I was just thinking — this all seems a little over the top, don’t you think?”
“Was eating 10 pounds of elephant ears a little over the top?”
“Yeah, probably.”
“But didn’t that make last night the best night of your life?”
“I mean, it made me throw up…”
“I’m just trying to make today as much fun for us as last night was.”
“Uh OK, it just seems like a bad idea to make him mad. Also, it kind of feels like you’re showing off.”
“Yeah sure whatever,” Jared mumbled as he kept his eyes down the hallway. “Oh, there he is!” Jared took his iPod Touch out of his pocket, pointed it at Kodey and started recording.
Kodey gave him a weird look as he walked down the hallway. “What are you doing?”
“Just filming my day at school, that’s all.”
“OK weirdo, just point that somewhere else.”
“Sure thing!” Jared said as he pointed it at Kodey’s locker.
“Weirdo,” Kodey mumbled. He stepped up to the locker. 3. 27. 17. Click…
KAPOW!
A giant stuffed sea creature sprang from Kodey’s locker.
“AHHHH!” Kodey screamed a high-pitch scream. He stumbled backward until his back foot stepped onto a skateboard that someone had carelessly left on the ground, almost as if that person knew exactly where Kodey would be stepping. Kodey’s foot zoomed backward until…
RRRRIIIIIIIIP
…He did the splits. The perfect splits. Splits so perfect that his pants ripped in the back, revealing Mickey Mouse undies. The crowd that had gathered when they heard the scream gasped at the underwear, then let out a roar of laughter.
Kodey’s face turned bright red from embarrassment, then, when he saw Jared still filming with the iPod, dark red from anger.
“You!” He marched toward Jared. “You did this!”
“Did what?”
Kodey grabbed Jared and lunged for his iPod. “I’m going to shove this down your throat!”
Jared knew the lunge was coming, so just before Kodey could reach, he tossed the iPod over his head into his left hand. Kodey lunged again. Jared dropped it onto his foot and kicked it back into his right hand.
“AHHHHH!” Kodey lunged a third time. Jared tossed the iPod high into the air.
“Hey! HEY!” Vice Principal Fuqua pushed through the crowd. Mr. Fuqua marched the march of a man who had spent a decade in the Special Forces. He didn’t of course — he was bony and nearsighted and hadn’t served a single minute in the military. He REALLY enjoyed military history, however, and was constantly acting like he lived in one of those black and white war movies. Right now, he was c
oming at Jared and Kodey with the pent-up fury of a man who hadn’t handed out a detention in days. “What’s going on here?!” Mr. Fuqua shouted. When he said, “here,” he gestured toward Jared and Kodey. And when he gestured with his hand, Jared’s iPod fell directly into his palm.
“He was trying to take my iPod, sir,” Jared said.
“He sabotaged me!”
“Sir, I didn’t do anything. The whole thing’s recorded on that iPod you’re holding. You can skip to the end if you want to see.”
Mr. Fuqua swiped his finger on the iPod. “I’m going to shove this down your throat!” Kodey yelled from the tiny speakers.
Mr. Fuqua pointed at Kodey. “After school detention.” Kodey threw up his hands and turned back to his locker. That’s when Mr. Fuqua noticed his Mickey Mouse Clubhouse briefs. “You have a change of clothes, son?”
Jared piped up. “I have an extra pair of pants he can borrow, sir.”
Mr. Fuqua nodded. “Thank you. We all good here?”
Jared nodded. Kodey huffed.
“Very good.” Mr. Fuqua handed the iPod back to Jared and walked away.
Jared turned to his locker and handed Kodey a plastic bag. Kodey got real close to Jared and snatched it. “We’re not done,” he snarled before marching to the bathroom to change.
Jared barely heard the threat. He was too busy grinning like an idiot at Bre four lockers away.
“You OK?” she asked.
“Yeah, great! Do you want to see the video?”
“I can’t believe you recorded the whole thing!” Bre said as she walked to class with Jared. As they walked past Lenny, Jared gave his cousin a thumbs up. Lenny shook his head.
The bell rang a few minutes later, and Mrs. Pierce started class. “Let’s begin by collecting last night’s math homework. Make sure you…”
Kodey walked into the class.
“…Oh. Oh my. Mr. Kline, that is quite a fashion statement.”
The class giggled. Kodey’s new pants were checkered white and bright blue, and they flared into two huge bell bottoms. Jared grinned. The magic eight ball was right again — the pants fit perfectly.
CHAPTER FIVE
Magical Treetop Hideout
A huge group gathered in front of the lockers after class. In the middle of it all stood Jared Foreman, telling the future.
“You’re going to get an 85 on the science test Monday.”
“What about me? What about me?”
“Uhhhh, 59. I’m so sorry.”
“How are you doing this!”
“It’s a gift.”
“Jared! Jared!”
Next to him, looking on in amazement, was Bre Burris.
“I’m sorry guys, I’ll try to get to everyone. If you don’t get your future this morning, I’ll be back in the afternoon, where for a small fee…”
Lenny pushed through the crowd. “Jared, can I have a word?”
“Not now, Lenny.”
Lenny pulled him aside anyways. “You need to stop.”
“I need to stop helping people?”
“I don’t know that telling people what they’re going to get on a test is ‘helping’ them. I also don’t think that you’ll get to keep your little ball for too much longer if you keep showing off for the whole school.”
Jared put his hand on Lenny’s shoulder. “I’m sorry you’re so jealous.”
“What?! Why would I be jealous?”
Jared tilted his head toward Breanna. Lenny squinted at him. Jared sighed and snuck the eight ball out of his book bag. “Is Bre still hanging out with me because she feels sorry for me?”
NO.
He held up the answer for Lenny, then winked a very annoying wink and turned back to his fans. “Sorry everyone. My cousin over there is just upset that I found out he wears teddy bear undies.”
The crowd roared its approval. Lenny turned red and marched away.
“Hey Bre,” Jared whispered to Breanna. “Want to see something cool?”
“Now?”
“Sure, why not?”
“Cuz we have to go to class.”
“We’re already excused from it. Follow me.”
Jared led Breanna through the school to a door marked “Maintenance Only.” He pushed open the door, walked up a dark staircase, and opened another door at the top.
“Isn’t this cool?”
They found themselves on the roof of the school, surrounded by a dome of overhanging tree branches with leaves turning every shade of orange, yellow and red. The way the morning sun was hitting the trees made the colors breathtaking. Jared felt like he’d been transported to a magical treetop hideout.
“Whooaaaaa,” Bre marveled. “This is amazing! I love the fall.”
“I know,” Jared said.
She gave him a sideways look. “You know?”
“Oh, uh, yeah. Everyone loves the fall!”
Bre turned back to the scene in front of her and smiled again. Then she frowned. “What did you mean that we were ‘already excused?’”
“Earlier this morning, Lenny turned a note into the office saying that the three of us were excused from science and history to help set up for the school drama. He was supposed to join us up here, but I think he’s a little cranky right now.”
Bre made a face. “Set up for the drama? Do you think that’s really going to work?”
“I know it’s going to work.”
“You sure know a lot of stuff today.”
Jared grinned. This was the best day.
Bre took one more look around and turned toward the door. “This was really cool, but I think I want to go back to class now.”
“Wait, wait!” Jared stopped her. “I have one more thing to show you.”
“What?”
“The back exit.” With that, Jared took off toward the edge of the roof. Ten feet, five feet, one more step, and suddenly he was flying through the air, doing a perfect cannonball off the school.
“JARED!” Bre screamed. She ran to the edge and looked over. There was Jared, lying on a stack of wrestling mats piled ten feet high.
“Haha, isn’t that cool?!” Jared yelled up. “You try!”
“I — I can’t,” she said. “I’m scared of heights. I’ll just, uh, I’ll take the stairs.”
Bre disappeared from the roof, and Jared closed his eyes. That could have gone better. He opened his eyes again, hopped off his tower of mats and started dragging them back to the gym.
“Excuse me.”
Jared jumped. He wasn’t expecting anyone — the magic eight ball had specifically said that he wouldn’t get in trouble.
“Are you Jared Foreman?”
Jared turned around. Standing behind him was a tall blond woman holding a microphone and newspaper. She had the paper opened to the community section and was pointing to the picture of Jared and Lenny posing like goofballs on top of their prize mountain.
“Yes, that’s me.”
“Hi!” The woman smiled a TV smile and held out her hand. “I’m Emily Spivney with Channel 5 News! How are you?”
“Uh, pretty good.”
“This picture is incredible!” she said. “We thought it would be fun to do a story for the seven o’clock news about how you won so many prizes. Would that be OK?”
Jared thought about it. On one hand, his parents would definitely find out that he’d fibbed about the library once they saw him on TV. On the other hand, they’d probably find out eventually since the picture made it into the paper. Plus, how many people get to be on the news?
“OK!” Jared said.
“Great, follow me!” Emily led Jared to a Channel 5 News van parked in front of the school. “Do you know where Lenny Patterson is?”
“He should be in Mrs. Harness’s history class.”
“OK! I’ll grab him real quick.” She motioned to the open back door of the van. “You can wait in there and check out the equipment if you want.”
Jared peeked into the news van. It was filled with tons
of computers and blinking electronics. “OK, cool!” He climbed in and moved a laptop from one of the benches.
“Great!” Emily said. “Be right back.”
Jared looked around at the van. He had tried to act cool around the news lady, but he couldn’t contain his glee by himself here in the van. He let out a weird giggle. Not even 24 hours ago, he was the one people were making fun of. Now, he was going to be on the news. The news! Bre would be so impressed.
Uh oh. Bre. Jared had forgotten that she was on her way down from the roof. Any second, she’d reach the mats and think that Jared had ditched her. Did he have enough time to find her and come back before the news lady returned with Lenny? He pulled out the magic eight ball.
“How long until Lenny shows up?”
An answer appeared behind the glass. Jared felt a stab of fear in his stomach. It wasn’t the answer he was expecting.
He nervously looked around the van, then jumped out of his seat to make a break for the open door. As soon as he stood up, however, the van roared to life and lurched forward. The sudden movement caught Jared by surprise, and he fell to the floor, dropping the eight ball in the process. As the van took off, the eight ball rolled out the door and onto the street. Before Jared could struggle to his feet again, the van screeched to a sudden stop, slamming the back door closed. Then it sped off, carrying Jared farther and farther away from his precious eight ball.
The eight ball rolled to a stop next to the curb, still displaying the one-word message that had turned Jared’s world upside-down:
RUN!
CHAPTER SIX
An Ocean of Doo-Doo
Locked.
Back door. Side door. The little window to the front seat. All locked. Jared looked around for something he could use to escape or contact the news station. Upon closer inspection, he found that the equipment in the van — high zoom lenses, long-distance microphones and what seemed to be remote listening devices — looked more like they belonged to a spy organization than Channel 5 News. Jared panicked and banged on the side of the van.
“Help! HELLLLLLLLLP!”
The van never slowed. It flew around corners, knocking Jared around his prison cell like a pinball. After just a few minutes of driving, though, it stopped. The engine shut off, and Jared heard the sound of someone jumping out of the van and crunching gravel under their feet as they walked around to the back.