by Tia Siren
I obeyed him, and he grabbed onto my shoulders with heavy pressure. He roared, erupting in my hand and frosting my fingers with his icing. I laughed triumphantly.
I stood up on my knees, examining my sticky hands. He was drained, panting and laughing nonstop in bed. We kept smiling at each other, and I was debating what to do next. I’d emptied him twice, but I wasn’t finished.
I scooted up right beside him, showing him what he did to my hands. Then, I took my fingers and put them into my mouth, one by one, licking and sucking his batter off my hands like I’d been making a cake.
It was subtle, but I could see that my tasting was doing something for him.
I ran my fingers, wet with my saliva, up and down his body. I started at his calves and went up to his shoulders. I made sure to drag my chest up along his body as I did it. I could see him rebuilding for me already.
I was enjoying his body too much. I loved the feeling of his built pecs flexing for me whenever I touched them. His skin was so soft, despite having some hair on his chest and arms. He kept his legs shaved, and they felt incredible to the touch.
As we drew closer together once again, my hands drifted further up his body, resting on his face. I caressed his hair and his cheeks, admiring his details. He was such a stunning man.
I wanted to keep it entirely out of my mind, but my thoughts suddenly shifted back to his words from before. “I never agreed not to fall in love with you.”
Those words, along with many others concerning his love for me, kept ringing in my mind as I held his head in my hands.
I had always loved Darren. He wasn’t just a friend to me. He was one of the closest companions I’d ever found. As we began to sexually mature, we noticed when our dynamic changed. We’d agreed early on in our friendship that we didn’t want to risk severing our connection because of damaged feelings.
Ironically, to continue sheltering our feelings, we ended our friendship. And yet, while I hated the circumstances of how Darren came back into my life, I was grateful to have him back.
I tossed aside the ripped remnants of my pants and climbed onto his lap, wet with anticipation. He was hard for me, but I wanted him solid as a boulder. I ground my wet folds against his thick shaft, making him harder and me wetter.
I couldn’t see the color of his eyes in the dark, but their perfection could still cut through the darkest of nights. I felt like he could see right through me.
He could still see and know my imperfections. And yet, when he would lavish me with affection, somehow, I believed that he didn’t notice them or care. He could go six years without seeing me, most of those without hearing my voice; and yet, he was able to talk to me and behave with me like no time had passed since we’d last seen each other. None of it felt forced, and all of it felt like it came from a real, deep place.
I grabbed onto his slippery dick and inserted it inside me. I rode his firm body, hands clasped onto his shoulders. We were both so horny that I knew it wouldn’t last long for either of us.
He grabbed onto my hair, tugging hard enough to move my head back. I arched my back, hopping harder on his meat. He spanked my ass with his free hand, cupping it.
I knew we were indeed in trouble. I knew that before morning came, I would dread the thought of having to watch him leave. Even though his return to Rome was days away, it didn’t stop me from picturing it.
He grabbed onto my ass with both hands, thrusting upward deep into me, startling me. That thrust was the push back to reality I needed. My current reality was ironically far greater than what my reality generally consisted of. It still, somehow, didn’t feel totally real to me.
I could feel him filling me up with his hot cum. The feeling of his fluids pouring in and out of me was enough to make me collapse around him once more.
He grabbed onto my face with both hands, pulling me to his lips. We held a long, passionate kiss for over a minute, holding each other in a full embrace. He didn’t want to leave me, and I didn’t want to feel him go. I was amazed that he didn’t slide out from the volume of lubrication between my legs.
After we disconnected and were satiated, we sank into my bed. We snuggled under the covers, and I huddled up into him. He held me close to him in his arms. His hold was strong, warm, and protective. I felt at home with him.
As we drifted toward sleep together, cuddling in my bed, I realized that I was right where I belonged. I knew that I hadn’t misjudged the situation, and I had no doubt that having him in Memphis with me was the right call.
Although, despite the numerous conversations we’d had on the subject, I suspected that I was falling in love with Darren. I’d been theorizing about my feelings for him for decades, but in the moments following our sex, the smoke had finally been lifted.
I wanted to sleep, but I couldn’t stop thinking about him. I didn’t know for sure, but I think that he stayed awake for a while, too. I thought about how easy it would’ve been to tell him. I pondered on muttering it quietly. I couldn’t muster the courage.
I fell into slumber with thoughts of Darren and about how I was going to handle my feelings for him. I had no idea what I was going to do.
Chapter 25
Darren
I woke up the next morning with Bailey still in my arms from our night of intense passion. Her eyes were closed, her hair draped over her face, and she was nuzzled into me. It was the best way I’d ever started a Saturday. I didn’t want to be anywhere else in the world. I only wanted to be with her.
I got to hold her and stare at her beauty for quite some time. But, all good things come to an end. My end was ushered in by her phone’s alarm going off. She woke up, pushing herself slightly away from me. She rubbed her enchanting eyes, opening them just enough for me to see myself in them.
“Hey,” she whispered.
“Good morning, beautiful.”
“There’s no way I look beautiful right now,” she mumbled. “You’re lying.”
“Never. I wouldn’t change a thing about you.”
“I wish I felt the same way,” she said, patting me on the shoulder. “You’re sweet. How’d you sleep?”
“Wonderfully, thank you.”
She leaned up, kissed my lips, and rolled out of bed. With the sunlight pouring in, I was easily able to see her entire delectable naked body. I immediately wanted to pull her back into bed and start the day the way we’d ended the night before.
Instead of speaking up, I receded back into the covers. She eventually came back in, wearing a sexy black bra and thong that left little to the imagination.
“I guess if you have to put something on, that’s what it should be,” I said.
She giggled. “Shut up. You really like it?”
“You look like a supermodel,” I told her. “Better, really.”
“Okay, now I know you’re full of shit,” she said, crossing her arms. “I don’t even look like Bailey Wright right now. I do like the underwear, though.”
“You look incredible, Bailey,” I said as sincerely as possible. “I can’t get over how rapturously—”
“Okay, it looks good, I believe you! I don’t want to put clothes on. I don’t want to leave this bed.”
“Then, don’t leave this bed,” I said patting the covers beside me.
“I wish I could, but I need to get ready,” she said. “Leah sent me a text asking if we could meet up for a while this morning to talk.”
“Ah, now I feel bad,” I said. “Did she not talk to you yesterday because I was with you? She could’ve trusted me.”
“It’s not like that,” she assured. “I’m not really sure what she wants to talk about. It’s probably more of the usual: record deal, tours, new songs. She didn’t get to talk with me much after she left Rome. We have some catching up to do.”
“I can keep your bed warm, that’s fine,” I said, growing happier with the idea of falling back asleep.
“Or, I can call a cab or an Uber and leave you the car,” she suggested. “You could dr
ive around a bit. Go out into the city and see what you think about it. You can find things that look interesting to you, and then we can go later or tomorrow. Oh! You should go to the Pyramid.”
“Memphis has a pyramid?”
“We have the pyramid,” she continued. “It’s an actual pyramid that was used as an arena for years. It’s one of the biggest pyramids in the world. It’s owned by Bass Pro now, so it has the tacky logo all over parts of it. But if you get past that, it’s really impressive. You can also go toward the top and see all of Memphis from the lookout.”
“I wish I’d brought my good camera,” I said.
“You could bring one of my guitars with you,” she suggested playfully. “You might feel inspired when you get that high.”
I had been contemplating many things frequently by then. I did wonder if living out in a big city like Memphis would be entirely out of the question. I told myself that thoughts like that had to dissipate if they were fueled primarily by sexual flames.
Since I felt confident that the roots of my ideas weren’t planted by sex, it felt healthier to consider them. I felt that it would also be easier and effective if I got out and saw new and different things to help “stir the pot.”
I got out of bed and put my boxers on. By the time I was getting my pants on, Bailey was already dressed and running a brush through her hair.
“What do you say?” she wondered. “Should I leave you the keys?”
“Yes, please.”
She tossed me her keys, and I caught them, putting them in my back pocket. I threw a shirt on from my luggage and hurried out of the bedroom before she could leave.
She looked at her reflection, put on her sunglasses, and blew me a kiss.
“Don’t get into trouble out there,” she said. “Text me!”
“I’ll let you know what I’m up to!”
She left to meet with Leah, and I was left alone with my thoughts. Rather than immerse me entirely, I decided to take Bailey’s advice and explore. I was optimistic that Memphis could win me over.
I spotted her old acoustic guitar in her bedroom closet collecting dust, and I figured she wouldn’t mind if I borrowed it. I grabbed a guitar pick from her “pick basket” that she had by the front door. I brushed my teeth, grabbed a granola bar, and hit the road.
I decided to go first to the Memphis Pyramid to see the view from above. The place was packed with many Bass Pro shoppers, most wearing something in camouflage or an American flag on it. Despite the fact that most of the men in the place were carrying a firearm and looked like they wanted an excuse to use it, I was the one that received the most stares because I was carrying a guitar on my back.
I went up the elevator that took me hundreds of feet up until it reached the lookout. There were some other people scattered about, most of them taking pictures. I didn’t feel like taking the guitar out of its case, but I did want to enjoy the view.
If you walked around the whole pyramid, you could indeed see all of Memphis and more. It was a nice observation deck, and it provided one of my highlights of the city.
Unfortunately, like the elevator I got into, things went down from there.
The people that I encountered during my day were rude, morose, or stoic, or all of the above. There appeared to be some solidarity among the people in terms of how to feel. No one smiled. Everyone over forty looked uncomfortable to be alive, and everyone under forty looked agitated and rushed. The homeless people I saw on the sidewalks seemed happier than the average citizen.
Around places that had a music scene it was better, but not wholly. There were many people playing instruments and singing songs without a care in the world, which was inspiring to see. The only downside is that most people walking past them barely paid any attention to the unique sounds that were being played all around them.
Another dose of reality was that, even though many of the musicians were talented and content to play, they still didn’t seem happy. It wasn’t that drain one can get when “losing the dream.” They seemed exhausted, ready for something new.
Customer service in most of the places I went to was lacking. I figured that southern hospitality would’ve been practiced all over Tennessee, but it wasn’t the case. To top it off, I was even unlucky with the meter readers. I was only two minutes late arriving back to where I’d parked Bailey’s car on the road, and someone was already there finishing up a parking ticket, eager to smack it on the windshield like a jackass.
No matter where I drove or walked to, I could never find a place where I felt inspired enough to take out Bailey’s old guitar and play. Every time I saw a place or spot that looked promising and like something that would stay in my memory forever, I couldn’t get invested. The sounds of the city would get in my head and frustrate my senses. The thousands of cars zipping by in an hour all making loud noises; obnoxious people yelling loud enough for Nashville to hear them; music blaring that couldn’t sound good no matter how close or far you were to it.
When Bailey was first moving to Memphis, she felt sure that it was the right move for her to make. Then, she talked about how much she loved the city and how she knew immediately that it was the right decision for her.
I knew that I would have to accept another hard truth, after coming to grips with another major one. I began to accept that maybe Garrett was right, and I wasn’t going to be comfortable in a place like Memphis. The truth was I knew right away that Memphis was not for me, and I probably wouldn’t be in a rush to come back after I returned home.
It was only mid-afternoon, and I wanted to give more of Memphis a chance, but I was much more willing to accept how I felt about Memphis than I was about anything related to Bailey directly. I decided to go back to her bed, where my happiest Tennessee memories thus far had been made.
I lay back in bed, still dressed, holding Bailey’s old guitar and wondering what to play.
I tried playing a variety of different popular songs, but I couldn’t get into any of them, no matter how much I loved them.
However, I found that as I played around with a few progressions that I made up as I went along, I was finally beginning to have some fun. I wasn’t sure what the music was going to be about, but I knew it was going to feel great to play.
Chapter 26
Bailey
I arrived at the studio after I’d stopped by Gracie’s to get Leah and me an omelet for a late breakfast. We ate fast as she caught me up on what she’d been up to since she got back.
I wanted to be fully there for her, yet my heart kept most of my attention. I kept thinking about Darren and how I didn’t even want to be away from him for a few hours let alone a few months or another few years.
Leah soon noticed she didn’t have my attention. “Hello?”
I still hadn’t snapped out of it. “Huh?”
“Bailey, are you all right dude?” she asked. “You seem out of it.”
“I am out of it,” I admitted. “I’m driving myself crazy about it.”
“The record deal?”
“No,” I said without thinking. “Him.”
“Darren?”
“I can’t think of anything else. I’m fulfilled whenever I’m with him. I don’t feel uncertain about things.”
“Whoa, what are you saying?” she asked with widening pupils.
“I’m saying that I really want him, but I know I can’t have him, so I want to curl up into a ball and burst into flames.”
“That’s quite specific,” she said.
“Why did I let him come here?” I said. “It is going to suck so hard watching him leave. Even bringing it up makes me want to fucking cry. How pathetic is that? What am I doing? Am I a horrible person? Am I trying to hurt him? Or am I trying to hurt myself? I don’t know what to think.”
“Dude, you are tripping right now.” She laughed. “Want me to get you some water?”
“I have tea, thank you,” I said. “In all seriousness, though, I’m so glad he’s here, but I would feel a lot le
ss stressed out if he wasn’t here.”
“Ah, true love,” she said sarcastically.
“I don’t mean it in a bad way,” I said. “It actually feels kind of good to freak out over a guy again. I don’t get that emotionally invested in boys anymore.”
“Hey, that ain’t no boy, and he isn’t just ‘someone,’” said Leah.
“You’re damn right about that,” I agreed. “He’s going out and looking around the city today. I’m hoping that he’ll see it isn’t as bad as he might think it is. He’ll like it here. He’ll like spending time with me. And he’ll get back into music, and we’ll release albums together under our own label.”
“Well, shit. How do you really feel about him?” she said. “Honey, you’re losing your mind. What is in that tea you’re drinking?”
“I want you to tell me what I should do,” I told her.
“About Darren or the contract?”
I shrugged. “Both.”
“When it comes to Darren, I’m afraid there’s nothing much for me to say,” Leah said. “You both are stubborn, and you will each live your half-lives instead of working a little to have a full life together. It’s like you both want to be miserable. Want my advice?”
“Please,” I begged.
“I say move to Nashville and bring his happy ass along with you there,” she said. “Nashville is ten times better than Memphis. Let’s be real.”
“I like it here.”
“Good for you,” she said nodding her head. “But, if I were you, I’d get a hold of my rising stardom and ride it somewhere better. Nashville isn’t far from here. The same state. The music scene is better there.”
“Subjective opinion,” I said dismissively.
“Nashville is a nicer starter place than here. A nice city to start a romance in and see if that’s the kind that could survive the type of hurdles that would come in an even bigger city than Memphis or Nashville. If things go right, you could easily be ready for L.A. or New York. Once you get to one of those cities, you might want to come to the party with a piece of man candy like him.”