by Linda Maran
Kristen wondered what her life would have been like had they stayed together. Would she still have met John?
“How long did you know my mom before you courted her?”
“Ach, our whole life. We grew up in the same district so went to the same Preaching services and school. Then later we attended the same classes for German and for baptism instructions. After that we started going to singings together, and before you know it, we were a couple.”
“You look so happy talking about her. I hope one day someone will look as happy when they talk about me,” Kristen said, leading them both down the stairs.
“Someone already does,” Jacob told her as they entered the kitchen.
Kristen picked up Sonny’s Deli take-out menu, but her gaze focused on Jacob instead of the sandwich choices. “Really? Who?”
“The Waglers. All of them care a great deal for you, Kristen. Little Anna’s eyes light up at the mention of your name. And I could say the very same thing about John.”
“John?” Kristen cleared her throat at the high pitch sound of her own voice. “He’s a good friend, but I think I’m more of a pain in the neck to him than anything else, especially since I’m nearly four years younger than he is. He’s been my sounding board from day one about all of my problems. I came with a lot of baggage, as they say. It’s not really fair to him. Or to any of the Waglers.”
“Doesn’t seem like a matter of fair or unfair. Seems more like a matter of situations beyond your control. Beyond the control of any of us.”
“Maybe. But I’ve been more trouble than anything else to that family.”
“Your familye,” Jacob emphasized.
Kristen sighed. “Well, yes, that’s true. But I’m different than all of them. I didn’t grow up Plain like they did. Like you. I’m the oddball because of that. Even if I was baptized, people will probably not think of me as being Plain.”
“Kristen. Each of us is who Gott made us to be. We’re on a journey of doing Gott’s will from the moment we enter the world. You were born of Plain parents. But Gott placed you on a different path. Who can question His ways?”
Kristen laughed. “Now you sound like John. I guess it’s an Amish thing. I’ll try not to question God’s will, even though I don’t understand it at all.” She picked up the phone to call in their lunch order, and Jacob took a seat at the table. Who would’ve ever thought that she had an Amish father? And that he’d be sitting at her kitchen table? Before June, she’d never even given a thought to the Amish. Hadn’t ever seen a Plain person. Little did she know.
~*~
After lunch Jacob walked to the beach with Kristen. She asked him to wait while she got them each a pass for the day. Then she waved him on and they walked onto the crowded beach.
Colored towels and blankets were strewn about most of the sand. Beach chairs and umbrellas occupied nearly every other spot on the beach.
“It’s always packed like this on weekends during the summer. But once Labor Day comes, all the bennies are gone.”
“Bennies?”
“Yes. That’s what the locals here at the shore call the outsiders who come here to soak up the beneficial rays. Bennies. Get it?”
Jacob laughed. “Jah. I get it. The Amish use nicknames, too, you know. Like we call, Ben Gaber, Big Ben, and Ben Zook, Skinny Ben.”
“That’s right, I forgot about that. Imagine the nickname they’d have for me?”
Jacob stopped walking to look at her. “Beautiful Kristen.” He averted his eyes. “Jah, that’s a gut nickname for you, dochter. You have a beautiful heart.”
26
Kristen was unable to sleep. She focused on the sound of the ocean through the open window. It soothed her some, but she worried about what Jacob thought after seeing the world she’d lived in all of her life. Did he have doubts as to whether she could conform to life in Stone Arabia? Would he trample down his doubts just because she had no other family and had been born to Amish parents?
Dawn was only a short time away. She turned to find a more comfortable position when she heard her mom’s bedroom door creak. She snapped up, got out of bed, slipped into her terry robe and walked toward what had been her mom’s room.
The door was ajar. She tiptoed closer and looked inside.
Jacob stood before the framed photos on the bureau. He picked up the one of her mom holding her as an infant. Ross stood behind them smiling. He stared at it without a flinch.
“I was a month old when that photo was taken.”
Jacob swung around nearly dropping the framed photo.
“I accidentally opened this door instead of the bathroom. And I saw the photos.”
Kristen nodded and walked over to stand next to him. He was family, and she was not about to enforce trespassing rules.
“And in this one, I was eight.” She handed him another framed photo of a young girl on the beach holding a pail full of water, wearing a big smile.
“You were a happy kind, jah?”
“At the beach, I was always happy,” she said, studying the photo.
“Only at the beach?”
“Well, no. It’s just that I was lonely a lot not having any siblings, with my mother working so much. But when she was home with me, we had nice times. I need to remember those more than the lonesome ones.”
“Jah, that would be best. Who is the woman in this photo?” Jacob handed Kristen another framed photo. She was with a blonde haired, older woman sitting on a bench on the boardwalk.
“Oh. That’s Sylvia. When I was in grammar school, she picked me up each day and stayed with me ’til Mom came home. She was very nice and made me great ice cream sodas. She doesn’t live too far from here.”
“What about playmates? Didn’t you have any kinner to play games with?”
Kristen’s mind went back down the years. Images flashed in her mind like so many photos. “Sure, I had some friends. We played together mostly during lunch time in the schoolyard. And on the weekends, I’d go to the movies or on the boardwalk with them. But after school, most of us stayed at home. The difference was that my friends had brothers and sisters, and they did their homework together. Like Cindy and her brother.”
“And that’s why you felt lonely, jah?”
“Partly. Not having family over on holidays like my friends did, made me feel lonely, too. Sometimes, my mom had to work at the hotel on Christmas and Ross would be away on business. I’d be sent over to Cindy’s house to be with her family. I loved sitting at their dinner table and secretly wished they were my family.”
Jacob placed the framed photo back on the bureau.
She didn’t see pity when he looked at her. She saw a quiet understanding.
“Vell, had you grown up Plain, you would’ve been too tired from chores to play with the other kinner for very long.”
Even though his words were meant to lighten the topic, they were also very true. From her short time with the Amish, she noted how children had their chores cut out for them at an early age. But for the most part, the children, like Anna, seemed anxious to please and no complaints were heard.
“Anna never seems tired. At least not compared to me.” Kristen told him with a laugh.
“Jah, she is full of energy. Maybe it’s that fudge she likes so much,” Jacob teased.
Kristen laughed again. She was now fully at ease with Jacob…her father.
“Probably all that sugar revs her up. Well, while you get yourself washed up, I’ll go make us some breakfast to rev us up, OK?”
“Sounds gut to me.”
They left the bedroom, and Kristen went downstairs as Jacob entered the bathroom. She heard him turn on the water in the sink and realized she’d forgotten the clean towels in the dryer.
She retrieved a couple and ran upstairs to give them to him when she heard him talking. She stood back from the partially closed door.
“Jacob Mast, it should have been you standing behind Emily and Kristen all those years ago.”
Kristen
stepped closer. She had to strain to hear him.
“Ach! Katie. How I wish you hadn’t done what you did.”
Tears welled in Kristen’s eyes but she stood perfectly still. She knew she should walk away, but she wanted to give him the towels and would wait until the talking stopped.
He continued. “Jacob Mast, you will take up where Emily Esh left off. Kristen is your dochter. The gut Lord brought you both together at last. It is truly a blessing for sure and for certain.” He stopped.
She waited a few more seconds to be sure and then knocked on the door. “I forgot to give you towels…Daed.”
He took them and gazed into her misted eyes. He probably realized that she’d heard what was said. Yet his wide smile conveyed only affection and joy. And even though the Amish did not encourage much physical affection, she leaned over and kissed him on the cheek then scurried back downstairs to fix them both a tasty breakfast made with the love that was bursting from her heart.
While they ate, Kristen was pleased that Jacob took a second helping of the scrambled eggs she’d served at the table right from the pan. She realized that this was the first time she’d ever cooked for anyone all on her own, except for herself.
“Tell me. Did you grow up Christian, dochter?”
The question surprised her.
“Uh-huh. Catholic, actually. It’s the church closet to us, and Mom said she had me baptized there. She wasn’t a church goer and so I only attended Masses there with Cindy and her family for Christmas and Easter. Sometimes I’d stop in for a while by myself.”
“So, being in Stone Arabia is your first experience with a church community then.”
Jacob put his fork down for a moment and looked at her with a frown and raised brows. She couldn’t tell if it was sorrow, compassion, or both that she saw in his eyes.
“Well…yes. I didn’t know any of the parishioners at the church here because I wasn’t there regularly.”
Jacob resumed eating.
“To be honest, the best part about church services in Stone Arabia is the gathering and the food afterwards,” she said.
He chuckled at her comment and she laughed with him.
“Jah, that is always gut. I am sure many others will agree with you on that.”
“But seriously…Daed. I like not being alone and anonymous anymore.”
Jacob nodded. He gazed at her with a quiet understanding. No more frown, no sanctimonious words.
Kristen smiled and her father smiled back as they resumed eating their eggs and toast. She basked in the ease between them now.
#
After Kristen waved good-bye to Jacob as his taxi departed, she went to her room to begin the arduous task of cleaning out her closet and drawers. She decided to tackle one room at a time during her two-week stay. Then she’d have time to touch up some of the white paint that had chipped off from the molding, and give attention to more detailed things. The house had surely been neglected.
She’d filled a large black plastic bag and as she tied it closed her cell phone rang. She’d clipped it onto the waistband of her jeans, and quickly saw the caller ID as Angela’s. “Hi, Angela. What’s up?”
“I have a few messages for you. Mary asked me to say hello, as did Anna, your aunt and uncle, and John. Then later on I saw your aunt Miriam, and she also asked me to give you her best.”
John was the only name Kristen focused on. Not that she didn’t appreciate greetings from the others, but Angela never mentioned John in any of her previous daily calls.
“So, John is added to the greeting list, I see. That’s nice to hear. Did you get the voice mail message I left for you to say hello to him? I guess he’s just saying hello back.” She tried to sound calm considering how hard her heart pounded inside her chest.
“Yes, I got the message, but John asked me to say hello before I got a chance to listen to it. I’ll tell him you said hello in a little while when I pass the house. They should be home relaxing on an off-Sunday.”
“OK, that’s great. Thanks.” Kristen had a dozen questions, but she didn’t want to sound overly curious about John, although Angela was no dummy and surely noticed something between Kristen and him.
“So, did Jacob leave today?”
“Yes. We had breakfast first and took a short walk on the boardwalk before his taxi came. I think he had a nice weekend here.”
“Who wouldn’t have a nice weekend at the shore on a sunny weekend in August? Which, uh, reminds me of something else.”
“Oh? What’s that?”
“I think you’ll need to learn how to drive a horse and buggy soon.”
“I wanted to learn but never got a chance yet. Why?”
“It’s frowned upon if you hire a driver too often for things that are not really considered important. Like going off to swim in a lake too far for a buggy to get to.”
“Oh. I planned on asking you to drive me back to that huge lake where we had the picnic. Why was it OK for you to drive us that time?”
“The Waglers only do that once or twice a year, and they have the bishop’s permission. It’s a family outing on an off-Sunday.”
“Did someone say something to you?” Kristen remembered Onkle Jonas forbidding her to ask Angela for such rides after that night she’d come home so late from taking Cindy back to the shore.
“No. I just know from experience. I’ve been a driver for a few Amish families here for several years now, and I hear things. I thought it better if I tell you before anyone else does.”
“Thanks, Angela. Uncle Jonas already spelled that out for me, but I figured it was only because he’d been upset when we came home late from our drive here and back.”
“Maybe. But he would have said something sooner or later anyway. I’m only supposed to drive you to doctors, weddings, funerals, the mall when necessary, places that are too far to get to by horse and buggy, and the occasional family picnic.”
Kristen sighed.
“Of course, this doesn’t mean you can’t go swimming. You’ll have to get yourself to a closer place by buggy.”
“I better get all the swimming in that I can while I’m here, then. We have a family-size buggy, and a two person open buggy that Uncle Jonas got for John when he started to court Sadie. But someone almost always has both of them out now that they have the store. One more thing to deal with.”
“I’m sure they’ll make a way for you to have a buggy. It should be fun learning to drive a horse and buggy. Bet you never thought you’d be doing that.”
True. She also never thought she’d have to swim in a dress, wash with hand pumped water, use kerosene and battery lamps, and most of all, fall in love with an Amish man. A very handsome, protective, strong, Amish man. Then again, she was born of Amish parents. She kept forgetting that.
~*~
Monday morning when Kristen got back from her swim she was surprised to see mail in between the screen and storm door. She’d thought the mail was still going to Riley’s office. And if not, why wasn’t it in the mailbox? Then she saw a note under the rubber band that held the mail together.
Stopped by to say hello, but you were out. Figured you’d want your mail while there. We can talk about the bills I have here another time. –Riley Gallagher
The only way she could pay the bills is with the inheritance from her mother or if she rented the house as soon as possible. But everything hinged on her turning eighteen, according to Riley. Her mom had willed her all of her savings but at the age of eighteen…and the house would not be legally hers until that time, even though Mattie had signed it over to her. Two and a half more months. She could make peace with that.
In the meantime, she had to make more progress on cleaning it out as the Realtor requested. She’d get to it in a little while. Right now, she wanted to open the two letters that bore the same return address of Stone Arabia and postmarked Palatine, N.Y.
She went into the kitchen and sat at the table. She could tell by the handwriting and stationery that one w
as feminine and the other masculine. Both return addresses simply said Wagler with the Dillenback address.
She opened the yellow envelope with the bluebird on it. It was from Mary. She told of how things were at the store and that Katie was doing well at her job at the diner and enjoyed it very much. Anna had written a few lines on the very bottom. She’d made a new flavor fudge and couldn’t wait for Kristen to try it. She ended it with an “I miss you.”
Kristen smiled and put the letter aside. Then she opened the blue one. Curious, her eyes quickly scanned to the end for the signature. Yours, John.
Her heart sped up and a sweat dampened her brow. She wasn’t expecting a letter from John. She didn’t even think men wrote letters much these days. Well, at least not in her world with e-mails and texting.
She took a deep breath and read…
Dear Kristen,
I hope this letter finds you well and that your time with Jacob was enjoyable. I know you have a lot of work to do there at the house. I wish I could be there to help. But the store takes all of my time and of course, I could not come alone.
Things are good here. Everyone is fine and sends their best to you.
You are missed. It is not the same without you sitting across from me at the table for meals. Who will point out all the cheese I eat?
Take care. With prayers and good thoughts.
Yours, John
Kristen read the letter again. “You are missed.” Those three words made her heart reel. She got up and paced the length of the kitchen back and forth. She was so excited she wanted to jump up and down. But before she got to thinking much more about it, the doorbell rang. No one except Riley and Mattie Cook knew she was back at Bradley Beach.
Kristen peeked out from the window.
What was Cindy thinking?
27
Kristen opened the door with reluctance.
“Hi, Cindy. Hello, Derick.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you were here? My parents drove down the block last night and said they saw lights on in more than one window. I thought I’d come by and see what was up,” Cindy said all in one breath.