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The Complete Poems of A R Ammons, Volume 1

Page 53

by A. R. Ammons


  650be surrounded in a specified radial essential, which is difficult:

  imagining withered conditions (for company), I think of

  settled bulk, the ancient bristlecone, a sprout surviving

  fanny: down South there: when they want to say magnificent they

  say most-maggie-went-a-fishing: does’em good: have atchoo

  655and a couple of belches: when I was a freckle-faced boy, said

  they warn’t no freckles but fart bran from following cows:

  said I was a redheaded woodpecker: I was redheaded: I been

  humiliated: now, I’m a redheaded, woody pecker: stand

  up, stand up for beauty, thou soldier of the breechjammed hole,

  660garrison gates, thou wayfarer upon the breastworks and

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  ramparts (ram parts), thou regular maker of meter, convivial iamb,

  sleuthy sluice: halt, hut, two: what we believe in requires no

  believing: if the axe falls on the toe, severance will

  follow promptly: put the burner on Hi the coffee will boil:

  665push down the fence it will no longer be standing: walk off

  the cliff, air greets you: so much we do not need to

  be urged to believe, we’re true, true believers with no

  expenditure of will: to believe what runs against the

  evidence requires belief—concentration, imagination, stubbornness,

  670art, and some magic: the need to disbelieve belief so disbelief

  can be believed: there are infidels only of fictions: not

  a single temple has been raised to the fact that what is raised

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  falls, yet that is the lesson: here’s my credo: if the merry-

  go-round goes too fast it will be difficult to hold on: if you

  675pull up the rosestock, you lose your hips: certitude plus:

  everything in moderation including moderation: when you come

  to know the eternal forces realizing themselves through form

  you will need to lay on no special determination to assent

  to what demands none: but if truth is colorless, fictions

  680need be supreme, real supreme with hot-shot convincingness

  and lashes laid on lavishly for the doubter, and, per

  usual, regular dues: gentlemen of the naked vision, let us

  see straight: here we are today and here we are not tomorrow:

  if you kick the sand you are likely to raise some dust:

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  685if you bite me in the ear, I will knee you in the nuts:

  if you do something nice for me, I will feel encouraged to do

  something nice for you: fight on my side, we fight together:

  aleatory composition and choral improvisation throwback to

  dinosaur lagoons, the much floating, winged sawbills,

  690bankless, ambient figurings, dismemberments of breath by

  overhanging fern-spun ramification: I hear the swirls of

  morays, I think, breathing undersea, and see shadows

  of mantas remora travel in: but which way is this distant—

  a throwback or coming: I’m aware of the military-industrial

  695complex and of lust for erosion: I hear in choral breakings

  in and out clamoring gulls guzzling a clam shoal washed up

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  rank: I hear us coming to a pass and just beyond the ridge

  sawbills chirr circling an outbreak of undamageable light:

  a single dot of light, traveling, will memorize the sphere:

  700redemptions despise the reality: when may it not be our

  task so to come into the knowledge of the reality as to

  participate therein: wherever the imagined lands it’s

  likely to brush up against a thorn and pop or get hit by

  a bus on the freeway or at the minimum be thought flatulent:

  705I wonder where all on what ledges, on what nordic heights

  or high sinkages of meadow the aspen grows and where all

  poplar breaks out in shivering testimonial under bright skies,

  if along irrigation ditches, flat lengths into diminishment,

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  regimentation of strict discipline, or at the edges of backwoods

  710fields, off from the sight of anything save night’s night bird or

  day’s night bird: I wonder where all seagulls follow the plow,

  how far inland, or float serene in dislocation on sweetwater

  lakes, I wonder where all along the bottoms of what hills the

  roses open their brief and failing rages: ardency is a

  715calf, butting and guzzling, let free to the cow: a luminous

  saint reeling in the heights of objectless desire: hornets

  after rain splitting out for lit flies: my heart shakes,

  my eyes concentration’s flames, you my attention, absolute:

  dust travels, gets up into the wind’s limbs and through

  720stirrings and catchments makes itself available to new

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  coherences, settles out, for example, carrying in microscopic

  branches paramecium, virus, germ to damp stayings,

  boom bloomings, gets going to return: leaves nothing lost:

  the field widens—at the same time the essential begins

  725to take shape: an immense victory unfolds before me: my

  potassium-laced diet (jiggers of orange juice) will free me

  from episodes of irregular heartbeats, premature ventriculations,

  and the misimpressions ads for nonprescription painkillers

  pain me with: I expect to promote good will and difficult

  730clarities: I’m tired of bumfuzzlement and bafflement: and

  I expect to give my friends who have found it impossible to

  love me grounds for further trials: a big clinkery is a big

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  cinder field or a clinkery of big cinders: a fish out of water’s

  out for water: grief is all I know and joy all I understand:

  735news item—search of creek nets no new results: today’s

  radicalism is tomorrow’s triviality: but excellence,

  one of the forming principles of the universe, is ever

  radical: garrulity is harm enough even when, as here, it

  finds harmless way: but novelty, like garrulity, is one

  740of the forming principles, so much waste and ill-conceiving

  before invention provides advancement to the ongoing:

  for a form to complete everything with! orb: but this is the

  procedure: if everything’s put in, the boundary bursts and

  one is nowhere except picking up havoc’s fragments, things

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  745nowise as shapely in their selfness as before: but

  settling in the beginning for fency definition, that straight

  reach across the variable field, chokes the pulse, bores

  the tame, excludes the free rush of imagination except as

  wind or as a small consistency like sand: the only bearable

  750fence is the continuum, the scope of oneness under which

  the proud ephemerals play discretely in their energizing

  laws and play out, transformations taking their ways, bending

  their boundaries, giving and losing: the outface of the

  sphere, the skinny seat on infinity, this holding, this

  755gentle stay in the bosom of reconciling but progressing

  motions: the universes, they say, warp, bend, plunge into

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  dark centers that blossom white into other spaces, but in

  the slope and backwater of some ancient events, the meld

  cools into solidifications, white roots lift green leafages,

  760mold blooms pink and orange in the shade, and maggots race

  like traveling waves in the ste
ms of brief, huge mushrooms:

  in this open form there’s room enough for everything to find

  its running self-concisions and expansions, its way, its

  definition, down to the precious least: (when an image or

  765item is raised into class representative of cluster, clump,

  or set, its boundaries are overinvested, the supercharge is

  explosive, so that the burden of energy overwhelms the matter,

  and aura, glow, or spirituality results, a kind of pitchblende,

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  radium, sun-like: and when the item is moved beyond class

  770into symbol or paradigmatic item, matter is a mere seed

  afloat in radiance: it is the mystery, if reasonable, that

  when the one item stands for all, the one item is so lost

  in its charge that it is no longer bounded but all radiance:

  this is the source of spirit, probably, the simple result of

  775the categorizing mind: the mind will forever work in this way,

  and the spiritual, the divine, always be with us: in the

  comprehensiveness and focus of the Most High is the obliteration

  total that contains all and in that we rest, moving as we like

  back into change and boundary and back: since these procedures

  780will not change, we may think rescue omnipresent, a calming,

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  and may exist in that really through the last change: a state

  of mind can override the worst tendency and not, even in

  surrender to the tendency, be false to its state: to live in

  the shifts of facts, unorganized and dark, is to know only

  785generation, mindless, fallen, senselessly repeating: things

  work in these ways: deliverance a way they allow): what,

  April 23rd and still not a daffodil: suddenly as if a

  bright bird had passed, one is old: one dozes forgetful of what

  one was for: a suspension of interrelationships: the reader is

  790the medium by which one work of art judges another: hypnosis

  is induced by focusing the attention: the trinket swings

  or spins before the eyes, the normal flood of distractions

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  that keeps one awake is drained, and the mind sinks into

  simplified ease: the poem, its rhythm, is exclusive and hypnotic,

  795too, but the poem keeps enough revelant variety going to interest

  the mind from sleep but enough focus to disinterest it in

  external matters: a hypnotic focus, then, that is awakening,

  a focus of controlled fullness, not over-exclusiveness: but

  the purpose of the motion of a poem is to bring the focused,

  800awakened mind to no-motion, to a still contemplation of the

  whole motion, all the motions, of the poem: this is very

  different from hypnosis: a descent into the subconscious

  (tentacles maybe into the unconscious) is prepared for not by

  blotting out the conscious mind but by intensifying the alertness

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  805of the conscious mind even while it permits itself to sink,

  to be lowered down the ladder of structured motions to the

  refreshing energies of the deeper self: but why is it of use

  to be brought through organized motion from chaos and

  ephemerality to no-motion: to touch the knowledge that

  810motions are instances of order and direction occurring

  briefly in the stillness that surrounds: to touch, to know,

  to be measured and criticized by the silence, to acknowledge

  and surrender to wholeness and composure: the non-verbal

  energy at that moment released, transformed back through the

  815verbal, the sayable poem: spirit-being, great one in the world

  beyond sense, how do you fare and how may we fare to Thee:

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  people set out to serve the people become those the people

  serve: given the skinny poles of fact to theory, person to

  man, event to continuum, how are we to develop intermediacy:

  820what is to be done, what is saving: is it so to come to know

  the works of the Most High as to assent to them and be reconciled

  by them, so to hold those works in our imaginations as to think

  them our correspondent invention, our best design within the

  governing possibilities: so to take on the Reason of the Most

  825High as to in some part celebrate Him and offer Him not our

  flight but our cordiality and gratitude: so to look to the

  moment of consciousness as to find there, beyond all the

  individual costs and horrors, perplexing pains and seizures,

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  joy’s surviving radiance: I ask because I am terrified of my

  830arrogance and do not know and do not know if the point in the

  mind can be established to last beyond the falling away

  of the world and the dreams of the world: but if we are small

  can we be great by going away from the Most High into our own

  makings, thus despising what He has given: or can we, accepting

  835our smallness, bend to cherish the greatness that rolls through

  our sharp days, that spends us on its measureless currents: and

  so, for a moment, if only for a moment, participate in those means

  that provide the brief bloom in the eternal presence: is this

  our saving: is this our perishable thought that imperishably

  840bears us through the final loss: then sufficient thanks for that:

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  there is a faculty or knack, smallish, in the mind that can turn

  as with tooling irons immediacy into bends of concision, shapes

  struck with airs to keep so that one grows unable to believe that

  the piling up of figurements and entanglements could proceed from

  845the tiny working of the small, if persistent, faculty: as if the

  world could be brought to flow by and take the bent of

  that single bend: and immediately flip over into the mirrored world

  of permanence, another place trans-shaped with knackery: a brook in

  the mind that will eventually glitter away the seas: and yet pile

  850them all up, every drop recollected: a little mill that changes

  everything, not from its shape, but from change: the faculty

  then can be itself, small, but masterful in the face of size and

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  spectacular ramification into diversity: (the way to have a following

  is to get up in front of whatever is moving and start waving your

  855arms): (sir, the piece you have sent me on poetic process and

  psychotherapy errs not in being wrong but in being rudimentary: the

  poetic consciousness beginning at a center works itself out by

  incorporation until through craft, experience, insight, etc., it

  brushes in a fulsome way against the fulsomeness of nature so that

  860on the periphery it is so deeply spelt out that it can tangle with

  the coincidental: this provides a growing edge to change and surprise

  so that unexpectedness is constantly being fed into the engines of

  assimilation and probability, giving shades of tone and air

  to the probabilities that make them mean slightly adjusted things):

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  865if raindrops are words, the poet is the cloud whose

  gathering and withholding overspills generously and unmissed

  from a great keeping: (depression, low pressure area): the

  false poet is a white wisp that tries to wrest itself into

  a storm: but the true storm moseys on with easy destructions

 
; 870like afterthoughts: how else but by greatness can the huge

  presence exist between the gifty showers, twists and blow-outs:

  on the way back from Northfield today (April 29, I’ve been

  away a few days to Baltimore) I wrote a poem as follows:

  when I go up into the mountains, I like to go up into the

  875mountains: when I come down from the mountains, I like to

  come down from the mountains: there has to be something ahead

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  to like: it might as well be what is ahead: I found this

  word repodepo in the newspaper only to find it, apparently,

  a mischance of machinery: I could not myself have invented

  880a nonexistence so probable, insignificance so well made: let

  it stand for a made nothing, a pointer with no point: or

  for anything about which the meaning is insecure: a heavy

  registration: a cluster of empty pods, or a special phonetic

  depot, or something that repods pseudopods: a leaf cannot

  885appear on or fall from the branch except via the total

  involvement of the universe: you and I cannot walk the street

  or rise to the occasion except via the sum total of effect

  and possibility of the universe: we are not half-in and

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