by Margaret Way
“I love Ivy,” he cried.
“It makes me truly happy to hear it.”
“You’re so bloody perfect, aren’t you!” His whole demeanour had turned hostile. “Heaven will surely be yours. You even look like an angel. Smile like an angel. I can’t understand why Ivy’s so sickly. Jess and I have scarcely had a sick day in our lives. Jess thinks Ivy’s poor health could have something to do with the way Kathy took drugs.”
“Drugs?” Disbelief hardened Mallory’s voice. “Where’s the evidence for that?” she shot back. “All you’re doing is throwing something else into the equation. This is the first I’ve heard of Kathy Burch taking drugs. There was no talk of Kathy having a drug problem or a drink problem, for that matter. Forrester is a small town. Everyone knows everyone else’s business. There was no evidence of drug taking, even if she was a bit promiscuous. Looking for love in all the wrong places, poor girl. Kathy revealed something I didn’t know. She said Jessica was with you that night you and Kathy got drunk. Is that true?” She pinned his gaze. “Jessica, always screwing things up for you.”
“Kathy lied,” he gasped.
“What would be her reason to lie? Tell me that.”
“Because she’s a bloody pathological liar, that’s why. Tell one lie, you can tell thousands. Anyway, she was probably hallucinating. Jess swore to me Kathy takes drugs.”
Anger flared. “Good old Jess! Ever think she was running a bluff? Your sister has always had her own agenda. If Kathy takes drugs, where does she get them from? How does she pay for them? She walks around in rags. Who is her supplier? If you believe Jessica’s story—which I don’t—why don’t you find out? It’s your responsibility. But tell me, what part of the evening was Jessica with you?”
Jason’s tormented face was filled with real confusion. “Mallory, I hardly remember. All I know is, I lost you.”
“But you did gain a wife and daughter. You say you and Kathy can’t bond. Maybe the remedy is for Jessica to get another job in another part of the world. She sticks so close to you, Jason, Kathy must feel she doesn’t stand a chance.”
Jason wiped the sweat from his brow with the back of his hand. “You’re not listening, Mallory. You’re supposed to be a trained listener. There’s no possibility I can ever love Kathy. I love you. I will never be able to deal with losing you.” He drew closer, taller, infinitely stronger, looming over her. No wonder women feared men’s vastly superior strength. Mallory would have felt real alarm had they been in some secluded place instead of in plain view of the house.
Still she resisted the urge to step back. “Jason, that part of our lives is long over!”
Jason’s eyes blazed with naked hate. “You would never have tolerated Jessica’s interference in our lives, much less put up with her on a daily basis.”
Mallory jumped on the clue. “Was that my big appeal? In your heart, you wanted to be free of your sister?”
For an answer, Jason grabbed her upper arm, his hard calloused fingers biting into her soft flesh. “You want me to admit it? Well, it’s a YES!” he hissed. “I so wanted Jess out of the picture. It’s like being held captive.”
Mallory’s head was awhirl. “Captive? Explain. While you’re at it, take your hand off me.”
He was slow to respond, dragging his hands down the length of her arms, his fingers encircling her narrow wrists like a pair of handcuffs. “Mallory, I’m sorry.”
“No, you’re not.” She was amazingly calm.
“Don’t you remember how happy we were?” he implored. “Has it gone from your memory? Has it gone forever?”
“I remember you betrayed me, Jason. You betrayed yourself. Your family. You got Kathy pregnant. You thought you would get away with it. You didn’t. There’s a price we have to pay for our mistakes. Not that anyone could call your little daughter a mistake. She’s precious. You seem to be throwing aside all that a decent man wants. You’re throwing aside the parents who love you, a wife who would love you if you gave her half a chance. The way things are, Kathy can’t blossom. She’s being frozen out by your sister. You do what Jessica wants. She’s the one with authority, though I can believe underneath you loathe her power. Any romantic thoughts of me that you still entertain need to be knocked out of your head. I now realize back then you saw me as a buffer between you and Jessica.”
“You were everything to me,” he declared.
“You mean you saw me as the woman who could seize control from Jessica. I’ve studied the dark side of the human psyche, Jason. The dark side is far more widespread than people imagine. If you want to be free, you have to stop Jessica from controlling your life. What I suggest for now is to allow me to arrange for your mother to meet Ivy. It would be a first step towards normality. Kathy will have no objection. Your mother no longer holds Kathy responsible for what happened in the past.”
Jason reacted violently. “Will you stop enshrining Kathy as my wife. I can’t bear to have sex with her. If she weren’t such a pathetic wimp, I’d divorce her.”
Mallory gave him a bright, fierce glance. “Well, it’s clear you can’t remain together in such a destructive marriage. If you’re not having sex with your wife, who are you having sex with? You’re a young man. How many women have you got on the go?”
Jason’s rage visibly moved up several notches. His face and throat were swamped with hot blood. Even his blue eyes seemed to bulge. “Are you losing your mind or what?”
Mallory realized any movement from her could trigger a violent physical reaction. Still she spoke out. “My advice, for what it’s worth, is to get rid of your sister.”
Jason put both hands over his face, dragging them down to his throat. “I can hardly see or think of anyone but you, Mallory. You are everything I want in this world. I want to pull you into my arms right now. Hold you. Kiss you . . . kiss you . . . kiss you. I want to feel something. Pure desire for a woman. I want my self-respect back. It’s been gone for so long. People used to like me. Now they don’t. My own parents don’t want to see me. I’m not a bad man. Doesn’t life owe me some happiness? As for the future, what future? I had a future with you.” He was overwhelmed by despair. “There’s no one like you, Mallory. There never will be again. Is it any wonder I hate Kathy?” Now he locked his strong hands together as if he were locking them around a small defenceless throat.
Poor diminished Kathy.
A feeling of helplessness rolled over Mallory. “Kathy didn’t get much of a bargain either. Hate can make bad things happen. Look into your own behaviour, Jason. You were drunk and you got swept away. I’d think long and hard too about where Jessica was on that night. She couldn’t have been far away.”
Jason’s blue eyes burned. “Leave it. I don’t remember.” His glance cut off in the direction of the house, then back to her. “What’s Forrester to you?”
“What he has always been, my friend.”
“Friend? Like hell. The Lord Protector, eternal champion of beautiful women has spotted us. He’s on his way.” Jason’s intense jealousy of Blaine was obvious. “No surprises there. He’s always kept an eye on you, hasn’t he? If you ask me he wants you himself. You’re not fooling me. But you may be fooling yourself.” All the life had faded from Jason’s face. He turned away and left, but not before Mallory saw the murderous look in his blue eyes.
Jason’s whole life had gone to hell.
“Bad time?” Blaine enquired, when he joined her.
She could feel the probe of his eyes. “Is there a good one with Jason?” She needed a moment to take a breath. She was feeling a little spent. A squadron of sea birds streaked out of the sky to dive-bomb a wave, most coming up with a wriggling small fish.
“So, what did he want?”
Mallory released a sigh. “He’s a very unhappy man.”
“The whole town knows that. Jason has never recovered from losing you. Then he married a woman he didn’t love. His most glorious moments in life have come and gone.”
“He’s not yet thirty! He ha
s to get his life together even if he and Kathy split up. I told him he has to resolve his problems on his own. I made him furious as well.”
Blaine frowned. “Furious? How come?”
“I threw him off balance. I suggested Jessica might be bipolar because I seriously believe she could be. In which case, she should see a professional.”
Blaine answered with a certain amount of caution. “I know she’s very aggressive. There’s that rapid fire speech, though I have struck her on the odd occasion when she was blessedly mild.”
“Decreased activity level. She could have been entering the depressive phase. I’m prepared to say Jessica is bipolar. Medication would go a long way to stabilizing her moods. She needs help. It’s available. I told Jason this.”
“And the very suggestion of getting his sister help made him furious?”
“Indeed it did. I went further. As Jessica’s fraternal twin, he too could have inherited the disorder to some degree, only Jason in the old days was very good natured.”
“I’m not so sure of his good nature now,” Blaine said, any number of concerns flooding his mind. “I can’t remember when I last saw him in good spirits. So how did you end it?”
“Badly. He’s convinced there’s nothing wrong with her.”
“Or him.” Blaine’s expressive voice had turned metallic. “I’m worried about keeping Jason on. Brother and sister have serious issues that need to be addressed.”
“Let’s leave it for now.” She turned to face him, attempting a smile.
“You’re spending too much time in the house. I thought you might like a night out. There’s a new Thai restaurant just out of town. The Lotus Garden. Food and service are excellent. I’ve been there before, and I think you’d like it.”
She was silent a moment. “I’m sure I would.”
“Never a woman to rush into things.”
“I like to take my time, Blaine. So what night are we talking?”
He made a scoffing sound. “Well, I’m not talking next month or maybe the month after. This very night, if that suits you? I could pick you up at eight?”
She nodded. “I’d like that.”
“There, that wasn’t so hard, was it?”
She shook her head.
Said nothing.
Nothing of her strong rush of excitement. She should be forgetting about the past, her tangled emotions, none of which was fair to him.
Chapter Four
When Mallory was dressed, she went downstairs to show herself off to her uncle. It had always given him pleasure to see her dressed up to go out. In the living room, she made a graceful full turn, inviting her uncle to admire her. “Look fantastic, don’t I?” The long floaty skirt of her dress swirled out before wrapping around her slender legs.
“Ravishing!”
Is he seeing you or your mother?
Her heart stumbled painfully. “Maybe exaggerating a bit, but keep it up.” She sounded playful when she felt far from it. Her father had never once in her life told her she looked pretty, let alone ravishing. He had only been gratified by her academic successes which, naturally, he took as a reflection of his brilliant self. Looking down at her uncle, she was struck yet again by the disconcerting family resemblance between the two brothers. Both were tall, lean, handsome men with dark eyes and dark hair silvered at the temples. Her distinguished father sported a well-tended beard, which he treated lovingly, from time to time stroking it like a pet, but Robert was the one who radiated humour, understanding, and comfort, especially in times of crises. Her father’s response was to run.
“I couldn’t be more serious.” Robert grasped her hand, bringing her to a halt. “Love the dress.”
“Cost a bit, but it was worth it.”
He caught a pinch of the silk-chiffon fabric in a kaleidoscope of sunset colours, rubbing it between thumb and forefinger. “Truly beautiful,” he repeated.
“I’m glad you like it,” Mallory managed huskily. She was deeply affected by the look in his dark eyes. There was nothing new in that look. Her remarkable resemblance to her late mother had estranged her from her father, while bringing her close to her uncle. There were always reasons for the way people behaved as they did. Brushing her melancholy thoughts aside, she held the skirt wide so he could see the swirl of colours, dusky pink, turquoise, gold, citrus yellows, splashes of purple.
He stared up into her face. “I will always carry the picture of you in my heart.” Though his eyes were fixed on her, Mallory knew he wasn’t really seeing her. It spooked her. Why wouldn’t it? She was a separate identity.
“Blaine should be here soon.” She spoke quickly, to cover her raw feelings. Since she had lost her mother she had always had a desperate searching for identity. She had adored her mother. But she wasn’t her mother. She had a total otherness about her. She was herself.
“You’re sure you’re okay about my leaving you?” She was battling doubts. His aura had been grey. It had faded fast.
“Of course I’m okay,” he assured her, looking like a man totally at peace. “There’s nothing at all to worry about, my darling.”
Mallory placed her hands on his shoulders, staring down into his face with great tenderness. “You are and always have been more of a father to me than my absentee father. I love you, Uncle Robert.”
“I love you too, Mallory,” he responded. There was such fervour in his voice it trembled. He paused a moment to take a breath, then he spoke in an entirely different voice. “After I’m gone, all this is yours, Mallory. I’ve made a few bequests here and there, but you are, to all intents and purposes, my sole beneficiary. You have power of attorney should my health seriously deteriorate. Moonglade is yours. It will be up to you what to do with it.”
Ever the scholar, lines from Christopher Marlowe sprang instantly to Mallory’s mind.
I think my master means to die shortly
For he hath given me all his goods.
Suddenly she was on the verge of tears. She took her uncle’s thin face between her hands. “Uncle Robert, why are you talking like this? I mean for you to be around for a long, long time.”
His smile remained wonderfully serene. “I’m not given to mentioning my financial affairs, I know. But I think it’s time. Not that you don’t know you are the most important person in the world to me.” He continued to stare into her face, into the mournful beauty of her glistening eyes.
She shivered, not wanting to invoke the image of her dead mother. Yet how could she not? Sadness was tearing her to pieces. “My mother had precious little time. She was only a handful of years older than I am now when it was all over for her.”
“All over for me. All over for my poor brother. In some sad ways over for you, a little girl deprived of her mother. And in such a brutal way! Claudia bound us all together.”
She saw his mind had slipped back into its habitual mode.
No changing it. She knew in her heart, her lovely, generous mother would have wanted them all to live full lives. That was the task ahead of her.
“I have such dreams of her!” Robert said with a young man’s passion. “The dead appear to us in dreams. As a child you were always calling out for your mother. Now nearing the end of my life, more than ever Claudia walks towards me in all her beauty. I wait, hoping with all my heart she will walk into my arms, but she has always remained just that bit out of reach. Claudia was so beautiful, so vibrant, so clever. My brother all but crushed the life out of her. He has always been in ruthless pursuit of his own ambitions, even as a boy. One of his goals was taking Claudia from me. I loved Claudia with all my heart, so he had to take her. Simple as that. Claudia’s great mistake was marrying Nigel.”
“Why did you let her?” Her lack of understanding showed in her face. “Clever women do make foolish choices. I should know. And I do know my father, Uncle Robert.”
“My darling, I don’t think anyone knows Nigel well.”
“I’m so sorry he hasn’t contacted you,” Mallory apologized.
<
br /> “We’ll leave him to heaven. I see you as Claudia’s great gift to me. I’m convinced Claudia is watching over us.”
He was in a strangely exultant mood that nothing could dampen.
* * *
She greeted Blaine at the door. He looked wonderful, the utter embodiment of the old cliché: tall, dark, and handsome. She felt a powerful surge of sensation, both mental and physical. When he smiled at her, she had the mad impulse to go into his arms. The force of his eyes was enormous.
He paused suddenly, caught her wrist, dropped a light kiss on her cheek. “You look sensational.”
“Thank you.” She felt like putting up her hand, touching the place where he had kissed her. He hadn’t kissed her for years and years. Then she would have been enraptured. “This must be as close as it comes to a date,” she said.
“A first date.” He was watching her, amusement and something less readable in his eyes.
She didn’t lead an exciting life. She didn’t have a lover, a husband, or children. It was safe and heartbreaking at one and the same time. If anyone saw her as herself, even her flawed self, it was Blaine. Now they were off together for the evening. Lord knows what it would bring. Even his light kiss on her cheek had generated a lot of heat.
They moved across the spacious entrance hall dominated by a gilt and japanned Chinoiserie console. Atop it was a striking Great Barrier Reef scene that added vibrant colour. Blaine, naturally, wished to say a quick hello to Robert. “He’s waiting for you,” Mallory said. “He’s getting stronger every day.”
“Having someone you love around makes all the difference in the world.”
“Maybe you should give Selma another chance?” Why in sweet heaven did she keep pushing Selma at him?
He swung a wide shoulder. “Thank you, Mallory, but I already have someone else in mind.”
That stopped her in her tracks. If he did have someone else in mind—that could easily be the case given he had been chased by dozens of females since his teens—she would have the devil of a time accepting it. She couldn’t be robbed of Blaine. He was her friend, for better or worse.