by M. Clarke
Josh cried out and collapsed beside me, panting as rapidly as me. Our hands linked, a silent way of saying that was awesome. We should do it again. At least those were my thoughts.
“Come here,” Josh said, pulling me closer until half my body covered his. Sliding his hand through my hair and meeting my eyes, he kissed me gently.
Chapter 18
Josh
“Come here.” I pulled Isla into my arms, where she was meant to be from the second I met her.
Her auburn hair had grabbed my attention first in the sea of blondes and brunettes, and then her sexy black dress, clinging to every curve of that long body. Her high heels extended her already long legs, and I would have given anything to lick those legs like lollipops. Lust filled my mind, and my cock twitched. But when she turned, our eyes connected. The sweetness of her angel face stole my breath and caressed my heart. She took hold of me, and I became lost in her.
We stared at each other as the loud music thumped around us. At first I’d thought the rapid beating of my heart had been caused by the bass vibrating under my feet, but instead my heart reacted to her. It thundered harder in my chest when she rewarded me with her gorgeous smile. She stole my heart with that smile, and I needed to get to know her. So as I continued to lock my eyes on hers, I strode to her.
“Hi. I’m Josh.” I extended my hand, taking in the scent of her sweet, flowery perfume. The loud music gave me an excuse to lean closer to her. “I’m one of the models.”
The girl’s shoulder touched mine. “I’m Isla.” When she took my hand, my whole body quivered. “I’m one of the models too.”
“I see.” Lame. I wanted to slap myself.
“Are you having a good time?” she asked, eyeing my hand still holding hers.
“I am now.” I would give anything to be the bottom lip she just bit.
She shifted from one foot to the other. “I. Um. My friend is by the bar. She’s not feeling well, so I need to take her home.”
“Oh, sorry about your friend. And I’m sorry you’re leaving.” I gave her a sad expression.
She chuckled and released a soft breath. “I’m kind of dating someone right now,” she murmured hesitantly.
“Dump him.” I chuckled to make light of what I’d said.
She giggled. “I’m a date-one-at-a-time kind of person.”
I’m not. I didn’t want to tell her that, of course. I would have scared her off. “That’s too bad, but we can still be friends, can’t we?”
“Sure.” Her eyes lit up.
An arm slinked around my neck, and alcohol from her breath assaulted my nose when she opened her mouth to speak. “I see you’ve captured my ride’s attention.”
“Michelle. I didn’t know you had such a beautiful friend.”
She slipped past me to Isla, using Isla’s shoulder to balance. “You tell me everyone is beautiful, Josh.” She winked. “Just kidding. But I really don’t feel well. I ate something bad. Don’t worry. I have Isla’s phone number. She’s dating someone, so she’s hands off for now.”
“I should take Michelle home before she makes a fool of herself,” Isla said, her smile replaced by a serious one. “Anyway. It was nice meeting you.”
“The pleasure is mine, friend.”
She furrowed her brow in confusion.
“We’re friends, right?” It was all I offered women anyway, even if they wanted more. Having fun and sleeping around with any girl I pleased was my pleasure at that time. And damn, I would be lying to myself if I didn’t want to take her home and fuck her crazy. I did it in my mind regardless of her rejection.
“Of course.”
“I’ll call you soon, then.”
“Great.” Her lips curled, gazing at our hands. “I need my hands back please.”
“Darn.” I flashed a grin, releasing her reluctantly. “I’d thought I could borrow them so you would have to meet me for lunch or a drink to get them back.”
Isla let out a laugh, a sweet melody I wouldn’t forget.
“Hurry,” Michelle grumbled, her head resting on Isla’s shoulder.
“Sorry, Michelle. Give me a second.” Isla reached inside her purse and gave me a dollar. “Here. This is my gift to you. My number one rule in life: when someone gives you something, you can’t return it and you have to give something in return. See you next time when you’re ready to give me something.”
I called Isla a week later, and though she was dating someone, we became the best of friends. But I never gave her anything back. As I stroked Isla’s arm and admired her breasts in the moonlight, I said, “I’m ready to give you something, Isla.”
Isla propped her head with her fist, facing me. “What do you mean?”
“Do you remember the first time we meet?”
“Yes. How could I forget?” Her fingers traced the tail of my dragon tattoo across my chest. “This is so beautiful.”
“Thanks,” I said and gave her a kiss on her forehead. “Your rule you gave me, when someone gives you something, you can’t return it and you have to give something in return. Do you recall saying that to me?”
Isla poked the eye of the dragon. “I already told you I do, silly. Where are you going with this?”
“I never gave you anything back. Now I’m ready. I want to give you my heart, Isla.”
She stopped tracing and slowly peered up at me. Locking her teary eyes on mine, she said, “Josh. You want to give me your heart?”
“Yes.” I took her hand in mine.
“I won’t return it. Are you sure?”
“I’m positive.”
“Then I want to give you my heart too.”
“Are you sure?”
“Positive, but I need some questions answered.”
I kissed her knuckles. “We agree so easily. We’re perfect. But I don’t recall you saying anything about having to answer questions first.” I narrowed my eyes.
She pressed her palm to mine. “Don’t worry. This isn’t a test. You already know I’ve had relationships that didn’t last long. Shelly was your first love. I want to know what happened. I want to know everything. This is important to me, especially since you had a child together. I also want to know about your parents. You rarely, no, you never talk about them. If we’re going to give each other our hearts, I need to know everything good and bad about you.”
I nodded and guided her hand back to my chest. “Do you feel that?”
“Your heartbeat?”
“No. Not my heart. Yours. I feel your heart there.”
“Do you, now?”
“I think it likes being there very much.”
“I think so too, but it won’t stay there if you don’t open up,” she warned, her eyebrows lifting.
I lay on my back and folded my arms behind my neck for support. Revisiting my past always gave me an upset stomach. “I met Shelly in college. We were friends first, and then we hooked up when we got high together. She introduced me to drugs. It isn’t fair to blame my addiction on her, but it all started with her. I loved her. At least I thought I did. I didn’t know it at that time, but she wasn’t good for me. She’s different now. Mature, and she cleaned up just like me.”
“When you have a child, you kind of have to,” Isla commented.
Then I told Isla about Shelly getting pregnant, how my parents tried to pay her off, and how I tracked her down by hiring a professional private investigator. Isla continued to outline my tattoos from one side of my arm to the other as she listened.
“Wow, Josh. That’s one hell of a drama. I understand why you didn’t want to share, but I feel so much closer to you now. Doesn’t it feel good to get it out?”
Get it out. My dick is already hard for her again. My sly smirk let her know her words put naughty thoughts in my mind, but I decided not to comment. “It does,” I admitted. “But only to you. And Nathan knows some, but not all.”
“Do you talk to your parents?” she asked hesitantly.
I sat up, the sheet covering th
e lower half of my body. “As you already know, I don’t have a great relationship with my parents. My father wanted me to major in business. He had my life all planned out, but I turned out to be a disappointment.”
Isla sat up, mimicking my pose. “You’re not, Josh. Your parents should be proud of you. Not only have you changed your ways, but you’re also successful. Soon to be the hottest model alive, and that’s huge.”
“Am I? The last time I checked, Logan and I were tied.”
Isla took my hand in hers and held it firmly, reassuring me. “You will. I know it. Regardless, your parents should be proud.”
“I have a younger sister,” I blurted.
“What?” Her tone rose to a high pitch. “Seriously? And we all thought you were the only child.” She laughed. “What’s her name? How old is she?”
“Her name is Jasmine. And she’s two years younger than me. We’re pretty close. I see her sometimes on the weekends when she has time away from college. She’s a senior at USC. I don’t talk to her about our parents much, and I like to keep it that way. I tried to keep the drama away from her.”
“How is her relationship with your parents, and how does she feel about your relationship with them?”
“So many questions,” I teased.
Isla gave me light smack.
“She’s the goody two-shoes in our family, so she’s perfect. She’s always done everything my parents asked of her without question. Sometimes I wished I could be like her so my parents and I didn’t fight so much. But then I would have never been a model, and you and I might have never met.”
“But didn’t you mention your mother or father got you a modeling agent?”
I shook my head and felt disgusted by my father’s harsh words. “I did. It’s true. He said I was lucky I at least had the looks to do something with my life since I wasn’t smart enough for business school.”
“Oh.” Isla cupped her mouth in shock. “But you are smart, Josh.”
I continued, “To tell you the truth, I didn’t apply for business school. My father wasn’t going to tell me what to do with my life. Ironically, it worked out at the end. I love my job. And we would’ve met either way. Everyone has a soul mate, Isla. Without a doubt, I know you’re mine. I’ve never felt such a strong connection with anyone I’d just met in my entire life. It was the reason I had to be your friend even when you dated other men. I tried to build a relationship with women I dated, but I couldn’t. My heart belonged to you.”
Her eyes rounded, and then she frowned. “You mean you’ve been in love with me all this time we were friends?”
I nodded.
“Why didn’t you tell me? We…we could…we could have,” she stammered. “We could have avoided all the heartaches.”
“We weren’t ready. I don’t know how to explain it, but I think we both needed to be sure. Our friendship was on the line.” I brushed a strand of hair away from her eye and took her other hand in mine. “I think we both felt such a strong connection that we didn’t know what to do with it. Maybe we were both scared, knowing when we crossed that line, we would get happily ever after. I’m afraid to be happy.”
“Don’t be.” Isla smiled and gently caressed my face. “We’re all afraid. It’s too late now.”
“Oh, it’s way too late,” I stressed. “I’ve more than crossed the line. I’ve crossed over Isla’s rivers and valleys.”
She giggled, her cheeks glowing. “I feel for you more now that I know more about you.”
“Good. That was the plan.” I winked and then became serious. “You won’t be meeting my parents any time soon, so please don’t get offended. I have some issues to deal with them first before I let them into this part of my life.”
“Don’t worry, Josh. I understand. You take your time. But my sister-in-law, my brother, and my parents are going to want to meet you soon.”
“I can’t wait.” I meant it with all my heart.
Chapter 19
Isla
When we came back from Hawaii, Josh and I spent Monday morning and afternoon shopping together. Not only did we shop for furniture for Emma’s room, but we also purchased clothes and necessities. That evening, he went to Shelly’s place to spend time with Emma. His goal was to get her familiar with him so he could bring her home on Friday to spend the first weekend with us. So I spent most of the evening cleaning and readjusting Emma’s room.
Me: I’m kind of nervous.
Olivia: Because of Emma?
Me: No. I love babies.
Olivia: The ex?
Me: I hope she doesn’t turn out to be like a typical ex.
Olivia: Me too. Wait. Are you meeting her today?
Me: No. Josh is going to pick up Emma after he finishes a photo shoot for Sexiest Model Alive. They’re taking pictures of the three finalists.
Olivia: I hope he wins.
Me: Me too. I’ve been posting on social media to vote for him.
Olivia: Me too.
Me: You’re coming over tomorrow night, right?
Olivia: No need to ask. I want to meet Emma.
Me: See you tomorrow.
Text from Josh: I’m on my way to pick up Emma. See you in a bit.
I dropped my phone and ran downstairs when the doorbell chimed. The mailman? A package? The neighbor? Was Josh expecting company? Peeking through the tinted double glass door with an intricate design, I grabbed the brass doorknob and turned. A young woman holding a baby didn’t seem harmful. She had long, wavy blonde hair and striking features. Though she was a couple of inches smaller than me, she held her chin high as if she wanted to be eye level with me.
“Hi. How can I help you?” I smiled.
While the stranger scrutinized me from head to toe, I examined the baby’s face. Her thick long eyelashes framed her beautiful bluish-green eyes. The baby held my attention, mesmerizing me with her cuteness. Emma? Oh, God.
“Is Josh home?”
“I…no…but he should be here soon. He was supposed to pick up…?” My mind reeled back to our conversation and the last text he’d sent me. I’m on my way to pick up Emma. See you in a bit. Before I could invite her in, she adjusted the baby bag on her shoulder and barged past me. Rude. I would have stopped her, but I didn’t want to startle Emma.
“Nice,” she said softly, glancing around. Her eyes lit up when they shot to the high ceiling in the foyer where the sparkling crystal chandelier hung. Then she gazed at the dark metal handrail, curving along the stairs.
“You must be Shelly?” I said lightly, trying to be friendly and forget that she came in without my consent.
Her eyes fell back to me, her lips pressed firmly. “I am.” She pinned me with accusing eyes. “And you are?”
I felt like a stranger at my own place. “I’m Isla. I live here. Josh—”
“Oh,” she said tersely, cutting me off. The clicking of her boots echoed annoyingly as she inched in. After she examined the family area and the kitchen, she turned to me slowly as if she remembered something, and asked, “You live here?”
Did you not hear me? I bit my lips from saying something I would regret. Ugh! If she continued this charade, she was going to get a tongue lashing from me. Calm down. Breathe. Be better than her. “That’s what I said.” My tone stayed even.
“Josh didn’t tell me he lived with a … roommate.”
Anger shot through me. I wanted to correct her and say girlfriend, but I didn’t know what Josh had told Shelly about us. I didn’t want to make a fool out of myself. Though I shouldn’t believe a word she said, my anger shifted to Josh. Why didn’t he tell her? Then I began to doubt Josh, even after all those beautiful words he shared with me. What did I mean to him? And what did she mean to him? They say you never forget your first love.
I gnawed at the inside of my cheek, shaking in rage. Ugh! She was such a bitch. I wanted to kick her out. My worst nightmare about Josh’s ex came true. I didn’t like her attitude, tone, or the way she looked at me like I was an intruder. But again
, I wanted to be the better person and not stir anything up for Josh’s sake. After all, I had to think about Emma.
“I think you should call Josh. He said he was on his way to your place to pick up Emma,” I suggested.
She plopped down on the leather sofa and placed Emma and the bag on the white rug. “I’m fine. I’ve already texted him to let him know I was here.” Shelly made no eye contact and occupied herself by eyeing the flat screen television, the stereo system, the dark wood cabinets, and paintings of the ocean with palm trees.
As Emma’s fingers laced through the thick rug, she laughed. Wearing a pink sweater, jeans, and headband with pink and white flowers, she held my full attention. I wanted to talk to her and play with her, but I dared not go near her. I knew without a doubt mama lioness would not allow a stranger near her cub.
“Would you like anything to drink?” I tried again.
“No thanks,” she said sharply and checked her messages. “Look, Emma.” She showed Emma her phone. “Your daddy is on his way.”
Emma placed her hand on the wooden coffee table and pushed up to stand. She patted the table and started to take little steps. She bopped up and down, giggling, seemingly proud of herself, and continued along the length of the table. Since she hadn’t let go, I assumed she had recently started to learn how to walk.
Needing something to do, I decided to make tea for myself. Pouring water in the teakettle, I placed it on the stove to heat and waited.
“I don’t need a babysitter, Ill. You can go do whatever you need to do.” Her tone was soft and unthreatening, but it stung, especially when she purposely mispronounced my name.
I crossed my arms. “My name is Isla,” I pointed out. “Not Ill.”
The door to the garage creaked open and footsteps followed. Thank God Josh was home. My level of tolerance had been met, and I would have started a verbal war with her.
Shelly shot up from the sofa, picked up Emma, and dashed to Josh. “Emma, Daddy is home.”
Shelly’s words cut my insecure heart deeper, especially when they wrapped their arms around Josh and kissed his cheek.