“How dare you,” Kieran said. “After everything I have done so that you can be happy. How can turn around and throw it all in my face?”
“This is different. I needed you to help me. We needed to escape.” Chara shook her head, exasperated. “You don’t need this, Kieran.” She paused, then spoke again with a heartbreakingly sad tone. “And neither does Ruby.”
“I’m not forcing her,” Kieran protested defensively, as if accused.
“You don’t need to,” Chara glared. “You know every trick in the book to get a girl into your bed.”
“It’s not like that-“ he growled; but Chara hadn’t finished. She spoke over him in a way I would have never expected.
“You’re not in England anymore, Kieran.” She reminded him. “I know you experimented with all sorts of… ethnicities there; but it’s not the same here. You’ve forgotten the rules.”
“Since when have any of us played by the rules,” Kieran snarled, putting a noticeable emphasis on the word ‘us’.
“It’s all games to you!”
When Kieran spoke the green in his eyes had been consumed by the blackness of his pupil. He looked frighteningly composed, though I could tell inside an infuriated madness was eating at him. He leaned forwards cautiously, keeping his hidden emotions under control, and stated with a tone as dark as his eyes. “You have no idea what I feel Chara.”
“You don’t feel anything Kieran.” She glared at him, fearlessly stepping closer to his towering frame. “You do this all the time, skipping from girl to girl, playing with them like a toy for a bit, then leaving them without another glance. Look what happened to Briseis!”
“That’s entirely different-“ he protested.
“Yes it is,” she agreed, interrupting him furiously. “This time it’s a death sentence!”
I’d stayed silent throughout this exchange but now Chara turned to me. “Please Ruby,” she begged, “Please. I don’t want to lose you anymore than I want to lose Kieran. This is a stupid, stupid idea.”
I looked at her, hearing the sincerity in her voice, and apologized again.
Chara glanced up at Kieran and said with a contradicting sharpness, “I really hope it’s worth it.” Then she stomped away from us, back through the snow to our shelter.
Kieran and I stood in silence for a moment.
“Well that could have gone worse,” Kieran sighed eventually.
“Are you kidding?” I said, rubbing my hand against my temple rhythmically to soothe the aching there. “She hates us.”
“Well,” Kieran considered. “Yeah. But I half-expected her to cut my testicles off then and there. That’s what she promised to do if I ever hit on one of her friends.”
I glared, “She made it perfectly clear that I’m not the first girl you’ve ever been with.”
“You knew that,” Kieran pointed out casually.
“Yeah, but she made it sound like there were hundreds.”
Kieran shrugged and said simply, “I was a teenage boy.”
“You say that like it’s an excuse,” I accused.
“It is,” he confirmed, “Teenage years are the only time in a man’s life that he can be ruled by his hormones and get away with it. It was my duty to make the most of it.”
I rolled my eyes; hoping he was joking. “You’re technically still a teenager now.” I pointed out.
“True,” Kieran said, “But I’m not ruled by my hormones anymore.”
“So what are you ruled by?” I asked, narrowing my eyes.
“My heart.” he answered and then added as an afterthought: “And my stomach is a close second.”
I looked closely at him, trying to distinguish whether he was being sarcastic or serious, but I decided I probably didn’t want to know.
“Something really bad must have happened to Chara and Nik,” I said. “To make them need to leave Kariak before.”
Kieran looked away from me and seemed suddenly unapproachable.
“She was having a really rough time,” he swallowed uncomfortably, “She… she needed an escape as much as Adrian did.”
I looked at him, seeing the truth in his eyes. I didn’t want to ask him anymore about it; I could tell it was something difficult for both him and Chara to talk about. “So what now?” I asked finally.
“Now?” Kieran repeated, glancing around. “Now, we better return to the tent. We don’t want another of our friends –or Jayson- to find us missing together.” Then he smirked and reconsidered. “Actually I kind of do want Jayson to find us missing together.”
“I don’t,” I grunted temperately. “I like him.”
“He likes you,” Kieran frowned, “I hate him.”
“I know,” I sighed restlessly, “he hates you too. Come on. You go back. I won’t be long.”
I passed him his shirt back involuntarily, shivering in the freezing air and stepping back towards the pile of dry clothes Chara had offered me earlier. I quickly pulled them on; suddenly realising that someone was bound to notice my miraculously-healed arms.
I looked over to Kieran as he was just about to walk away. “What about this?” I asked, gesturing to my scars.
Kieran rolled his eyes then pointed over to when he’d previously flung his clothes. Now lying there on the grass was the dirty cloth Kieran had cleaned my wounds with previously; and a clean cloth beside it.
I nodded in understanding as he strode off again. I dropped the things I was carrying and picked up the clean cloth, wrapping it around my arm several times and shoving the end into a fold. It looked okay, not brilliant, but passable as a bandage. It was lucky that the others didn’t know about the symbols on my side; however there was nothing I could do about my face, other than blame the previous bruising on dirt. I quickly headed back.
As I neared the tent I could smell smoke and cooking meat. My stomach churned hungrily, the feeling so strong it was sickening. When was the last time I ate something that wasn’t stale or predominantly water?
Chara was nowhere to be seen but Jayson had managed to crawl out of the tent and was sitting next to Nik; who was currently passing him a bottle. Adrian was opposite them, chatting quietly to Nik; the apparent head chef.
Kieran sat off to the side antisocially, smoking and cleaning blood off a pile of weapons. I knew this was his usual job as the others never liked to contemplate the context behind the gruesome smear mark; of the death they’d inflicted. Perhaps that’s why Kieran was smoking - inhaling that strange drug that sometimes helped him sleep- because it helped him forget.
I stepped forwards and positioned myself between Nik and Jayson. “What’s cooking?” I asked neutrally.
“Just a few rabbits,” Nik smiled.
“Ah,” I said unenthusiastically, pulling a face. “I had a pet rabbit once.”
“Well it’s either that or a nice snow-slushy,” Nik smiled that soft, good-natured smile and I frowned again; reluctantly agreeing with him.
I lay back against the tough material of the tent, discovering that Jayson was staring at me. “What?” I wondered.
“Nothing,” he said, “I just missed you that’s all.”
I felt suddenly very guilty. “I missed you too,” I replied honestly.
There were many times that I’d wished Jayson and his constant, easy-going presence was at my side; cheering me up when I felt lost. I think my thoughts were just overshadowed by my hopeless longing to see Kieran. I’d never even realised just how much I’d missed and needed Jayson too.
“What did you do in that place?” Jayson wondered. “To pass the time.”
I pulled another face, “Nothing. I slept. Maybe thought of home.”
“What, your home here?”
I shrugged, “Sometimes. But mostly I thought about England; what people would be doing right now. Wondering if my friends missed me. If Alex had finally found a girlfriend. If Tanya’s pub was doing well.”
Jayson leaned back against the tent as well; I could feel it sag slightly under our weight.
I knew that Nik was listening curiously when I spoke; Adrian was staring with a peculiar expression at Jayson.
“What do you miss most?” Nik entered into the conversation.
I thought for a moment then replied tiredly; “Chocolate. Cadbury’s Dairy Milk. Oh and Ben and Jerry’s’ Ice Cream. It’s world-famous for being the only cure for a broken heart, you know.” I glanced at Nik and smiled, “Not that I imagine you’ll ever need it.” I paused momentarily, then remembered. “Oh, of course! What I miss most is music. I miss my IPod. I used to love slotting my headphones in and just ignoring the world. It’s such a good escape, you know? Like a book.”
“I miss coffee.” Nik said.
“There was a coffee machine in that cave.” I said.
“I know,” Nik shrugged. “Obviously whoever fetched all of those ‘supplies’ had a taste for French Vanilla.”
“Mum did too,” I laughed, “She used to only get it on her birthday though, it was tradition.”
“I get socks.” Jayson said, frowning. “Without fail.”
I suppose Kariak wasn’t that different from England after all.
A thought occurred to me then; I had absolutely no idea what date it was. “What’s the date?” I asked generally.
“Well,” Nik thought. “It’s the third or fourth day of the first month of winter…so in your terms it’s around the third of December.”
“Really?” I wondered; surprised. Is that it? I hadn’t even known these people for a month. Wow. So much has changed in such a short time. “It’s my birthday in three weeks.” I realised. “December 24th.”
Jayson grinned enthusiastically; “We’ll have to have a party.”
“God that’ll be weird,” I said. “To have a birthday here, and no Christmas to ruin it.”
There was a brief silence, then Jayson wondered; “Do you think you’ll ever go back?”
I shook my head immediately, “No. This is my home now. I belong here. We all do.”
“Not all,” I heard someone mumble, so quietly I barely recognised who had spoken. I glanced over at Adrian, who had his head down; his expression stern and hostile. “If anything I belong there.”
Jayson glanced over at Adrian, his eyes uncharacteristically unreadable. “No,” he said, with a surprisingly earnest voice. “You know that’s not true.”
Adrian glanced up at him, his eyes hard and calculating. “What the hell do you know about it?” he snarled. “Living in the perfect little bubble you do. How could you have any idea what it’s like for me here?”
I think that was the most passionate thing I had ever heard Adrian say.
Jayson didn’t avert his gaze. “If you remember, Adrian,” he said apathetically, utterly devoid of emotion. “It was you who made me like this; you and your obsession to have everything around you perfect.” Jayson sat up then, his voice as piercing as his hawkish amber eyes.
“It was perfect before you came,” Adrian glared. “No one knew. People would have thought I was normal.”
Jayson looked honestly hurt, but as the seconds passed he sighed and sat back again. “Well I don’t want to be normal,” he said quietly, closing his eyes and ending this impromptu, heated discussion. “It’s your loss if you do.”
Adrian looked away; ignoring all of us.
So the thing that happened between them, that broke the three friends apart, must have been something to do with Adrian and his humanity?
I glanced at the three of them: Kieran, Jayson and Adrian. All three so alike in some ways; and yet polar opposites in others. Like brothers. What could have happened between them to spark such hatred? I knew Jayson had told Lynk when they were breaking out of Kariak, but something must have triggered that behaviour? Why would Jayson do that?
What did they do to him first?
Chapter Eight
As the tension in the air became unbearable I had to say something to move the conversation on. The awkwardness was too much.
I turned towards Nik, directly addressing him. He too looked uncomfortable and confused by the interaction between Adrian and Jayson. “So what will happen when we go back?” I asked, not really interested in the answer but sick of silence.
“We’re just going to go to the front gate and let them arrest you,” Nik said absently; his thoughts obviously elsewhere.
“What?” I said, abruptly astounded as this reality hit me. “Seriously?”
Nik nodded, “If you hide, you’ll look like you have something to hide. If you do exactly what the High Council say from the kick off then they have no choice but to play by the rules and grant you a fair trial and a mind check.”
“But what about this mind-check?” I wondered nervously.
Nik frowned, poking the fire with a stick. “What about it?”
“Well,” I swallowed. “What exactly will the person be able to find out?”
“They’re professionals at what they do Ruby,” Adrian sneered, glaring at the fire with hostile black eyes. “They’re not going to go snooping around your memories for something humiliating they can laugh about later.”
“But what if I have secrets I don’t want people to know about?” I enquired, my vision darting, almost-unconsciously, to Kieran. He had his back to me, apparently still transfixed by the blades in his hands, but I could see that the muscles in his shoulders were tense. Had he heard me?
“Like what?” Adrian asked, examining my line of vision just as Jayson shuffled forwards and blocked it. Adrian smiled cruelly, thinking I’d been glancing at Jayson. “Oh, that kind of secret,” he laughed sharply. “Well don’t worry too much. What happens behind closed doors isn’t something the Council would be interested in.”
I glowered at him, though secretly appreciated Jayson being just in the right place at the right time -better to have Adrian thinking I’m with Jayson than have him know the truth. Still, it irritated me; why was he always so permanently obnoxious? I snapped angrily, “Mind your own business.”
Nik raised his eyebrows at my response. “I don’t think they’ll need to look that deeply. If you think about the memory while they’re doing their thing, they won’t even have to search for it, so,” he smiled cheekily, “you won’t have to share what does or doesn’t happen behind closed doors.”
“I don’t do anything behind closed doors!” I wailed, embarrassedly frustrated.
Jayson nudged me and smirked, “That’s not what you said last week.”
I glowered at him, Why are all boys so stupid when they’re together?
Kieran stood up suddenly, flicking his roll-up onto the snow. He swaggered over and looked at Jayson like he was something pitiful. “Oh Jayson, I know your dreams about Ruby are better than the truth, but you need to stop confusing them with reality.”
“What’s it to you?” Jayson challenged.
“Stop arguing,” I complained. “God I think I preferred being back in that cave. At least there it was quiet.” I put my hands over my ears to exaggerate my point. “I’m sick of all this hostility.”
As I finished my sentence I noticed Chara walking over. She glanced once at me, and then disappeared into the tent so I could no longer see her blotchy red face.
Everyone stared at me; I couldn’t handle it. I needed to leave.
I got up to get some air, awkwardly trying to disguise the fact that I was suddenly crying too. I shuffled off, wrapping my arms tightly around my body for warmth. I didn’t walk far, sitting on an icy boulder, pressing my hands against the pulsating pain in my skull. I felt so awful. I hadn’t even felt this bad when I’d been trapped in that cave with a thousand Daemons. Why did this matter so much to her?
To my surprise, it was Nik who came after me.
“Look,” he said, his soft handsome features calm and kind. “I don’t know what’s happened with you and Chara, but it really takes a lot to get a reaction like that out of her.”
I tried to wipe the tears away with the back of my hand. “She saw something she didn’t want to see, I gu
ess.” I sniffed pathetically.
Nik nodded, “You and Kieran?”
I looked over at him in horror, “What?”
“I saw her a few minutes ago and when I asked her what the problem she told me to ask Kieran,” he said quietly, his face indifferently gentle. “So I talked to Kieran, and he explained… sort of anyway.”
“What did he say?” I asked warily.
“Just that you and him had an argument about whether Kieran should heal you anymore,” he said, his forehead creasing slightly. “I know it’s none of my business but I really don’t think it’s worth it either. I know it’s an instant relief using Kieran; but letting your body heal naturally is definitely less risky. Although more painful.”
Relief flooded my system. So Nikolas still had no idea; thank God. I nodded seriously, as if deliberating on his opinion. “I know,” I sighed finally. “My arm just really hurt. I was probably being a wimp.”
“If you want,” Nikolas said generously, “I can go talk to Chara, maybe convince her to come over here. Would you like that?”
I nodded gratefully and he shuffled off to go find his wife.
A few moments later she brushed her way through the trees and stood before me expectantly. I rose slowly, swallowing, and looked at her. She seemed tired, her hazel eyes dim with stress, and her usually-luxurious brown hair limp and lifeless. She looked stern too, though she usually carried a comforting, maternal air that made me feel safe and protected.
I didn’t know what to say, but fortunately she spoke first. “Look.” She began, “I won’t pretend that I agree with what you’re doing, but… you are my friend. Kieran is like my brother. I know I can’t be angry at you forever.”
Well that was the last thing I’d anticipated.
“I shouldn’t have-” she persevered, but then exhaled in frustration, throwing her hands up and abruptly coming to sit next to me on the rock. My eyes widened in surprise as she stood up again and paced forwards. What was she doing?
“It’s just-” she began, then halted; sitting down again. Chara looked over at me and sighed, “It’s just. I…well, you’re just so much smarter than this!”
Risen (The Firebird Trilogy Book 2) Page 9