Time's Enduring Love

by Tia Dani

  "Joseph, please, you don't understand."

  "Damn right, I don't."

  "As much I want to, I'm not going to take her to the marriage bed."

  "Matt—"

  "No. Hear me out. Libby is my Jonah. Never in my life have I come across a woman who fans my insides into flames. I can't sleep or eat for thinking about her." Matthew paced in front of Joseph. "You can't imagine what it's like, hungering for her, yet not do right by her."

  "But, you can, Matt. All you have to do is marry her."

  Matthew stopped pacing. "No."

  Joseph shook his head. "Why are you so damned stubborn? What's wrong with being married? Hell, even I want to get married someday."

  "I'll never marry. I can't."

  "Why not?"

  "Elizabeth." The name bounded from his mouth before he could stop it.

  "My God." Joseph gaped at Matthew. "Elizabeth's been dead for twenty years. Why should she keep you from marrying Libby?"

  "Because I owe Elizabeth her memory."

  "So? She was a sweet child. But she was a child. Hell, we were all kids. Times change. We've grown up."

  Suddenly, Joseph inhaled sharply. "Tell me I'm wrong, Matt, but I have this strange feelin' you're throwin' happiness away because you think you're responsible for Elizabeth's death?"

  "You're not wrong."

  "God Almighty!" Joseph's curse rang throughout the barn. "You're crazy. Didn't you listen when my father told us what happened? Some fool hid several barrels of gunpowder in that hole you two crawled into. The fire set it off."

  "But why did she have to be the one taken?" Matthew's anger rent the air. "Why couldn't it have been me?"

  Before Joseph could respond, another voice answered. "You weren't the one meant to go."

  Matthew spun. Theo stood before him. His anger turned to rage. If Theo Strammon and his daughter hadn't come to Kansas, he wouldn't be forced to endure the constant pain and guilt. At least, not like this. He wiped his arm across his eyes and said heatedly, "Nobody asked you to butt in, Theo—"

  "Matt."

  Joseph's shocked voice didn't stop Matthew from continuing, "And don't spout religious platitudes about God's Will."

  Compassion was written across Theo's face. "I have no intentions of doing so."

  "Good. I don't want your sympathy either."

  "It's not sympathy I'm offering," Theo said softly. "Not in the sense you're talking about. I'm only saying you weren't the one meant to go. You were needed here. Elizabeth wasn't."

  "You're wrong. She was needed." Matthew stared off into the distance. "I needed her, her mother needed her."

  "No, Katherine needed you. What would Elizabeth have been able to do for her mother? She was only four years old."

  "I was only nine. Five years difference in age can't mean much."

  "It means a lot when it comes to survival. Where would Katherine be today if you hadn't been here to help her?"

  Matthew paused. Harsh as Theo's words were, truth rang true. Those first three years were hard, even with the other settlers helping out off and on. But it had been the two them, working day after grueling day, who managed to make the farm productive and successful. If Elizabeth had been the one to survive instead of him, he doubted if Katherine would have achieved what she had.

  "All right," he conceded, some of his anger draining away. "I was needed more. But you'll never change my mind about Elizabeth."

  "I wouldn't want to. I know how much she means to you."

  Matthew's head jerked up. He stared at Theo in confusion. For once, someone wasn't trying to talk him out of remembering Elizabeth.

  "Katherine explained how you felt about her daughter, and, from what she said, I gather the child felt the same about you."

  An unwanted smile appeared on Matthew's lips. "She did. She followed me everywhere."

  Joseph snorted; clearly relieved the tone of conversation was returning normal. "Elizabeth was his constant shadow if you want to know the truth. Luke and me used to wonder if Matthew wasn't plumb crazy in the head, puttin' up with her like he did. Hell, she'd look up at him with those big green eyes and smile, and he'd go all soft. It was enough to make a body sick."

  Theo laughed. "Apparently not Matthew, if he put up with it."

  "Yeah..." Joseph walked up beside Matthew and studied him. "Never gave it much thought, but it makes sense now. You really did care for her, didn't you?"

  Before Matthew could nod, Joseph sighed. "Hell, I'm sorry, Matt. I didn't realize how much her death hurt you."

  Matthew placed a hand on his friend's shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "It's all right, Joe. Not many people knew how I felt." He smiled, embarrassed, yet relieved, to admit something he'd kept hidden for so long. "I was afraid you and Luke would hound me to death about it."

  "Hound you?" Joseph chuckled. "Shoot, we probably would have done more if we could have gotten away with it." He looked at the barn's open doors. "I wonder if Luke's finished showin' off his house?"

  Matthew's instincts sharpened. "Why?"

  "'Cause I bet he didn't know about this either." Joseph grinned. "I think I'll mosey over there and tell him."

  "Oh, no you won't." Matthew grabbed Joseph's arm and started pushing him toward the back of the barn. "You're going with me to see how Tim and Getz are coming along."

  Joseph's grin widened as he was forced to walk backward. "Hey, Mr. Strammon," he hollered, "get Luke, will ya'? There's somethin' I need to tell him."

  Matthew stopped dragging Joseph and spun around. "Luke doesn't need to know about anything."

  Theo smiled and shrugged his shoulders. "If you say so."

  "What's the matter, Matt?" Joseph taunted. "Afraid of what Luke's gonna say?"

  "I'm not afraid of what Luke's going to say. It's what the two of you are going to do when you get together. I don't intend to be the butt of your jokes all night."

  "Matthew, Joseph...Guess what?" James tore into the barn, his brown eyes alive with excitement. "Wagons comin' down the road. Lots of 'em. The party's gonna start."

  Sighing, Matthew tugged on Joseph's arm again. "Promise me, you'll wait?"

  Joseph eyed him quietly. "All right, won't say anything to Luke until later. But..." He wiggled his eyebrows. "Aw, don't worry. We won't embarrass you."

  Matthew would have felt a lot better if he hadn't heard Joseph mutter, "Too much."

  Chapter Fifteen

  "What do you think?" Luke allowed Libby to step into the bedroom first. Pride of ownership rang in his voice.

  She walked to the center and scanned the spacious area in amazement. It was by far the biggest room in the house, other than the kitchen. "It's fantastic. Did you make all this furniture?" She headed for the bed and ran a finger over the intricate carvings on the headboard. They were beautifully done.

  "No, Matt did. He's worked on them for the past two winters. I got the bed moved in about a month ago. It was the last piece he finished."

  At the mention of Matthew's name, Libby dropped her hand from the headboard. She should have known. They had the same loving polish as her father's cane. "Where did he get the wood? There are no maple trees around here."

  "Shipped the wood in."

  "Good night." Libby turned. "Must have cost a fortune."

  Luke laughed. "It did, believe me. But it was worth every penny. Seeing you stand beside the bed makes it doubly so. I'd say you were meant to sleep in this room."

  "I...ah..." Libby cleared her throat uncomfortably. She hadn't missed the unspoken meaning behind his words. "What's happened to Sarah?" Not waiting for his reply, she went to the door and peered around the frame. "She said she'd only be gone for a few minutes."

  "Relax, Libby, I'm not proposing. At least, not yet."

  Caught totally off guard by his unexpected candidness, Libby turned. He'd crossed to the bedroom window. "At least, not yet?"

  "Don't think I don't want to ask you. I do. You're a beautiful woman and single." His voice turned bitt
er but Libby couldn't see his face for he was staring out the window. "However, I'm not stupid or blind. Your answer would be an immediate no."

  She was a tad miffed he predicted her reply. "What makes you think I'd say no?"

  "Because you're not in love with me. You're the type who has to be deeply in love before you'll marry. We haven't known each other for long. But it doesn't mean getting to the "yes" wouldn't be the best way to spend my time."

  Libby noticed a gleam in his eye. She sensed an inner mirth to his flirting. She placed her hands on her hips. "Luke Abrams, you're right about one thing, I do want to be in love with the man I marry, but it's not the reason why I'd say no now. I don't want to get married." She noticed his sudden smirk and warned, "Don't even think about saying it!"

  "Say what?"

  "That all women want to get married."

  His smirk turned into a full-blown smile. "Don't they?"

  "No, they don't." Libby stalked to the bed and plopped on the edge. Noticing how comfortable it felt, she bounced several times and added, "Some women want more out of life than housework and babies."

  "Ah, you're one of those Suffragettes."

  Her jaw dropped with his bombshell. She stopped bouncing. "You know about them?"

  "I read about them all the time." He left the window. "They have an interesting platform."

  "Where would you read about Suffragettes?"

  "In a Kansas City paper. It comes late, of course, but I do manage to get a paper every now and then."

  "What paper? The Kansas City Star?"

  "Never heard of it. I get The Journal. It comes on the stage. My sister sends it to me."

  "You have a sister?" Libby looked at him incredulously.

  Luke laughed. "Yes, and, believe it or not, I have a mother and a father, too. They all live in Kansas City."

  "But, I thought—"

  "You thought what? I was spawned from the ground?"

  "Of course not, but I thought all of you...I mean...you, Matthew, and Joseph all came west at the same time?"

  "We did. Only my parents didn't stay like the others. They decided the country was too uncivilized. They moved to Kansas City five years ago. My father's an outstanding lawyer. It wasn't hard for him to set up a prosperous business again."

  Libby glanced at the large bookcase standing in the corner of the room. Rows of law books lined the shelves. "Are you a lawyer?"

  "No, but I'm studying to be one." He caught her look of surprise. "There isn't much else to do when one lives alone like I do. My father sent me some of his books. Said anytime I wanted to come into business with him, let him know."

  "But...but if you did, you'd have to leave here. I got the impression you enjoyed farming?" Maybe this was the reason there was no county history of the Abrams.

  Luke sighed. "I do. That's the rub. I like both equally. Only, I can't be both a lawyer and a farmer here. This country doesn't have many people."

  "They will in the future," Libby said knowingly. "Maybe if you wait."

  He smiled. "Maybe, but I don't know. For the longest time, I thought farming was my passion, but lately I think it's going to be law."

  "Does anyone else know how you feel?"

  "No, not even Joseph or Matthew."

  "I'm a doctor." Libby announced before she could stop herself. She understood about passions.

  Luke's reaction was not what she expected. He nodded and said, "I know, Matt told me. He’s impressed."

  Libby couldn't believe Matthew would discuss anything about her, let alone be impressed. It was strange how easily both men accepted her profession. "He told you? When?"

  "This morning. He said you're sensitive about it."

  Libby's attention perked. She wasn't the one upset about it. Men were. Jumping to her feet, she glared at him. "Oh, I am, am I? How does he know I'm sensitive?"

  Luke held up his hands. "Hey, don't holler at me. You'll have to ask him."

  She sat back on the bed in a huff. "Believe me I wouldn't waste my time."

  "Good."

  She smiled at his empathic answer. "You know, Luke, I really do like you. You're easy to talk to, and you don't make me feel threatened at all."

  He seemed slightly taken aback at her statement. "Why should I?"

  "I don't know. Matthew does."

  "I'm not Matthew."

  "Tell me something I don't know already." Libby didn't bother hiding her irritation.

  He laughed and joined her on the bed. "You're funny, Libby. It's possible you and I would get along famously."

  Libby shook her head, not wanting to get back on the subject of marriage again. "No, we wouldn't. You're going to be a lawyer, and I'm doctor. We'd never see each other."

  "I'm not a lawyer yet."

  "You're going to be one, I know it."

  Sarah walked into the room unexpectedly. In her hand was a folded newspaper. "Libby, it says here Elizabeth Stanton might come to Kansas. Isn't it wonderful?"

  Luke glanced between Libby and Sarah. "Not the both of you?"

  Sarah looked at him in confusion. "Not the both of us what?"

  "Both of you are Suffragettes."

  "What's wrong with wanting to be a Suffragette?" Sarah's voice rose defensively.

  He gave Sarah a charming smile. "Nothing, dear, sweet lady."

  A light bulb clicked in Libby's head. Luke was more than just a smart man, he was wise too. He knew when it was time to smooth ruffled feminine feathers. "I happen to be for the women's movement. After all, my mother and sister are very active in it."

  "They are?"

  Libby and Sarah said it simultaneously. Libby wasn't sure what Sarah was thinking, but Luke had risen to a higher notch in her book. She really liked him now. "Luke Abrams, you are a darling man."

  Sarah nodded and gave Luke one of her rare, genuine smiles. "You certainly are."

  Luke slapped a hand across his chest and groaned. "Is this all it takes to get beautiful women to pay attention to you? I'm sick I haven't done it sooner."

  Libby nudged his arm with her elbow. "You're not sick and you know it."

  "I am, too. See..." He took her hand and placed it to his neck. "Feel my pulse."

  Libby laughed and pulled her hand away. "I don't need to check your pulse."

  He gave her an injured look. "Matt said you checked his pulse, and he wasn't sick."

  Disgusted at even thinking about it, Libby answered him without the least hesitation. "I did not. He's lying." If she'd have checked Matthew's pulse, she’d have remembered.

  Luke shook his head. "I don't think so. I know Matt. He doesn't lie."

  Since he seemed to be so certain, Libby started doubting her own memory. "Did he happen to say when I took his pulse?"

  "The other night." Luke's eyebrows wiggled conspiratorially.

  "The night I walked in my sleep?" Libby's face turned hot. She had touched Matthew in her sleep? What else had she done she didn't know about? Libby slapped her hand to her chest imitating Luke. "Now I'm going to be sick."

  Sarah walked over to the bed and sat down beside Libby. She asked dryly, "Is there anything I can do to help?"

  Libby groaned again. "Yes, find me something to throw up in."

  Sarah looked at Luke. "Isn't this a little drastic?"

  Luke nodded, but Libby disagreed. "Not from my view point, it isn't. I was sleepwalking, don't remember any of it. I'll never be able to look Matthew in the face again."

  "Aw, come on, Libby, Matt wasn't upset at all when he told me about it." Luke grinned and bent down. He pulled out a porcelain chamber pot from under the bed and plopped it on her lap. "He sounded quite normal when he told me about you touching his neck and leg."

  Libby moaned loud and collapsed back on the bed.

  Sarah huffed. "If you ask me, he should have been grateful Libby was willing to take care of him. After all, she is a doctor. If she was touching his neck and leg then she must have had a good reason. Even if she was sleepwalking."

  "Thank
you, Sarah," Libby was grateful someone stood up for her. "You're a true friend."

  "You're welcome. I consider you my friend too." Sarah straightened her back and rubbed it. She glared at Luke, some of her good humor gone. "You should be ashamed for teasing her."

  Luke studied her quizzically for several seconds then said thoughtfully, "You know, Sarah, you're quite a woman when you get your dander up. I didn't realize you had so much spunk."

  "It makes me so mad when men—"

  "Sarah, your eggs..." Katherine walked into the room and stopped cold. "Oh my word."

  Libby lifted up on her elbows, trying hard not to smile. Katherine stared with her mouth open. Obviously, she hadn't expected to find all three of them on the bed.

  Noticing Libby had a chamber pot on her stomach Katherine closed her mouth and asked calmly, "Am I missing something here?"

  Libby burst out laughing and again collapsed back onto the bed. Sarah giggled.

  Luke was the only one who kept a straight face. "Actually, Katherine," he said, "it's rather simple to explain. You see, we were discussing —"

  Katherine held up a hand. "Please, I'd rather not hear it." A smile appeared on her lips. "Knowing you're involved, Luke, I'm sure it's more than a simple story."

  "Oh, but—"

  "Not now, Luke, there isn't time." Katherine looked at Sarah. "Your eggs are done. Should I peel them?"

  Sarah sighed and struggled awkwardly to her feet, holding her back. "I'll do it."

  Libby rose up on her elbows. "I'll come with you."

  "No," Sarah said quickly. "You stay here with Luke."

  Surprised at Sarah not wanting her to help, Libby glanced at Luke. "But, I don't want to stay with him."

  Luke stuck out his tongue at her, and she laughed. "See?"

  Katherine settled the matter for all of them. "Luke, you've got guests arriving outside. You'd better get downstairs and greet them."

  "Company? Great Guns. I forgot about the party." Luke leapt to his feet and headed for the door. "Where are they now?"

  "Out behind the barn," Katherine called after him. "It's the Miller brothers. I told them I'd find you and send you along."