Forbidden (War Book 1)

by Trevion Burns

  “You and Blue are the best thing that ever happened to me. I’ve never been this happy in my entire life. You’re—” A lump moved down his throat. “You’re my best friends.”

  She leaped at him, locking her arms around his neck and kissing his lips rapid-fire, fighting a smile as he laughed softly between each of her wild pecks, puckering his own grinning lips to receive each one.

  Sobering, she pulled back, gazing up into his eyes as the soft breeze blew wisps of her hair across her face. He brushed each strand away with the pads of his fingers.

  “I love you too, Rocco.” She swore she felt the moment he exhaled, big shoulders relaxing under her arms. “I guess I’m just feeling this way because… because I don’t have the same experience as you. You’ll only be the second man I’ve ever been with since…well, since…”

  He didn’t need her to finish, shushing her softly.

  But she charged on. “What if I don’t know all the tricks and stunts they do?”

  “Baby, you’re not performing a circus act. It’s just two people who love each other, enjoying each other.”

  “What if I can’t please you?”

  “Not possible.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because if I’ve been able to please myself, all those agonizing months alone in the guesthouse, picturing your face? Barely able to stop myself from sneaking into the house in the middle of the night and climbing to your bed? If just the thought of you could do to me the things it did all those nights? Finally having real thing?” He gave a whistle, making her laugh. “No way in hell any other woman could ever compare. All of that was meaningless. Empty. The first time with a woman I love as much as I love you, all that can be is perfect, baby. That’s it. No matter what.”

  “Even if I only last three seconds and fall asleep right after?”

  “Even then.”

  “Even if you don’t get yours at all?”

  “Not possible. You wanna finish fast, we’ll finish fast. You wanna go slow, I can do that to. It’s whatever, Stella. As long as I’m with you.”

  A shy smile crossed her face, embarrassed at how insecure she was being, tightening her arms around his neck. “I can’t wait to be with you tonight.”

  “I can’t wait either, baby. Let’s go now.”

  She burst out laughing when he bent down and lifted her off her feet, squealing as he began a brisk jog toward the hotel, making her bounce in his arms as he carried her down the pier with her feet kicking wildly behind her, once again forcing any poor soul in their path to leap out of the way before they got caught in the crossfire.

  They were still laughing together when Rocco finally slowed and set her back on her feet, sharing a deep kiss just as his phone beeped in her hand once more.

  Stella’s eyes, which had fluttered closed in the midst of their embrace, popped open at the sound, taking in the notification on the screen.

  “FBI?” she asked, after tearing her lips from his.

  Rocco’s eyes widened and flew over his shoulder the moment the letters left her mouth. He snatched the phone from her hand quickly, drawing a surprised gasp from her lips.

  “What is that?” she asked as he immediately slid the phone in his pocket.

  “Just a newsletter,” he said. “Been trying to unsubscribe for months but the bastards just keep sending them.”

  “God, sounds like Pinterest. I’ll never regret anything more than I regret the day I gave those heathens my email address.” She stroked his cheek. “I’m sorry, baby. It must be hard to get reminders of it all the time, huh?”

  “Nah. Because it’s not really a reminder of what I lost, but what I gained.”

  She searched his face for any sign that he was pulling her tail. Telling her what she wanted to hear. Buttering her up because he knew a soft white bed still awaited them at the hotel across the street.

  But all she saw was the gentle gleam in his eyes, the tender smile on his lips, and the incredible coziness of his big arms as they wrapped themselves around her waist once more. She accepted the gentle kiss he placed on her lips, savoring his unique flavor, breathing in the delicious scent of his cologne, and barely able to resist the unbearable sensation of her clit pumping between her legs, coming alive at the memory of the lips that were on hers being wrapped around her aching bud just a few days ago on her office desk.

  He pulled back a breath, leaving his forehead against hers and their noses angled. “Let’s go eat. Your gonna need lots of energy tonight.”

  Rolling her eyes once more, Stella couldn’t help a giggle as he took her hand and dragged her toward the restaurant the concierge at their hotel had recommended was the best in all of Savannah.

  20

  “I love this song,” Stella purred, eyes fluttering as Chris Brown’s “With You” wafted through the speakers of the dim restaurant. Quiet conversation littered every small candlelit table in the building, just muffled enough to keep the patrons from disturbing one another. “I remember playing it on repeat in middle school, just praying that a man could love me enough to write a song like that about me. Or that I could ever feel that way about a man. I honestly didn’t believe I ever would. Or that I was even worthy… then…”

  When she didn’t finish, Rocco blinked softly from where he was leaning forward on the other side of the table. “It’s okay, Stella. It’s okay to talk about him.” He took a slow sip of his red wine, the bottle it had originated from sitting half empty next to them, its flavor the perfect compliment to the steak dinner that was half gone on his plate. “We can’t keep running from a ghost right? Every time we avoid talking about him like he’s some kind of evil spirit or something that’s running too. And he wasn’t evil. He was a good man and a huge part of our lives. It’s okay to talk about him.”

  She shrugged. “Do you ever feel guilty?”

  He licked his lips and thought about it for a long moment. “I used to. Shit, if I didn’t feel guilty, I would’ve kissed you for the first time a lot sooner than I did. But… I don’t feel that way anymore. DJ and Justin might not agree, they might not understand, but I think… if he has even a fraction of an idea, looking down on us, how fucking much I love you, I think he’d be happy.”

  She blushed. “Sometimes I wonder how he’d react. Like, if he walked in on us, right now, how would he feel?”

  “He’s not gonna walk in. That’s just it.”

  “I guess I’m just not as optimistic as you.” She played her fork around the noodles on her plate.

  “It’s not like we planned this, Stella. When he was alive, we couldn’t even stand to be in the same room together. Since the moment I stole your Pringles in first grade and dropped them all over the floor…”

  She burst out laughing, covering her mouth when it grabbed the attention of the patrons dining around them.

  “And you cried for the whole bus ride home and didn’t speak to me again for the rest of the year. We hated everything about each other from that moment on, all the way into adulthood.”

  “I actually hated you way before that, when you encouraged everyone in kindergarten to laugh at me during my inspired rendition of Somewhere Over the Rainbow.”

  “‘Inspired’ is a little strong, but you’re still proving my point. If we’d somehow found our way to each other back then, when he was still here, that would’ve been something to feel guilty about. But now that he’s gone, what are we supposed to do? Pretend that what’s happened between us isn’t happening? That what we’re feeling isn’t real? It’s real. At least it is for me.”

  “You remember when Blue used to burst into tears whenever I touched her?” She rolled her eyes when he chuckled his response. “I always felt like she could sense it. All the awful things that were going on inside me after he died. I think she knew that every time I looked at her, I saw him. How sad it made me feel. I feel like, now, she can hug me, and kiss me, and love me for that same reason. Because she can feel that I’m a different woman. In a better place. That I’
ve moved on, and I’m stronger. Not just for her, but for both of us. Ready to carry us through whatever the world has in store next. Ready to open myself up, even if it means I might get annihilated again.”

  “Stella, I’m never gonna do anything to cause you any unhappiness, whenever I can help it. I’m never gonna leave you. I’m never gonna leave Blue. I love the two of you more than myself. If it had to be you and me—and it does—then you have my word that I’ll make it worth every moment. Worth the shitstorm that will inevitably come our way, because love always wins, right?”

  She took a deep breath. “Right.”

  “Good…” He sat tall and took another sip of his wine. “You register for next semester yet?”

  “Not yet and, oh god, can we please not talk about this? I still can’t believe I let you convince me to re-visit this nightmare. There’s a reason I spent my entire short-lived college career year drunk off my ass.”

  “It’ll be over before you know it.”

  She tilted her head. “You make me better. You know that?”

  He froze in the midst of cutting his steak, eyes softening across the candle flickering in the middle of the table.

  “You make me a better woman, Rocco. I’m better with you beside me. Braver. Stronger. Smarter. God willing, anyway. If I can actually manage to finish.”

  “You will.”

  “Never in a million years did I believe I could run my own business. I wouldn’t have even known where to begin, let alone actually take the steps to do it. I just don’t know how I got so lucky. I really don’t. I just don’t know what I’d ever do without you.”

  “You’ll never have to find it out. And I don’t make you better. You were always better. Destined for more. I just lifted the veil from over your eyes.”

  “I always thought I only wanted to be a housewife. To be spoiled and taken care of. But I actually like having the spa, working my ass off to get it back on its feet. I feel like it makes me walk taller on the street. It’s the biggest rush to know, not just that it’s successful and thriving, but that it’s mine. All mine. Well… and yours too.” She smiled.

  “No, you’re right. It’s yours. I signed the loan, but you gave it life. You think I know the first thing about running a spa? That I’d even give a shit? Hell no. Stella Wolfe is yours. The success is yours. The glory… it’s all yours. You should be proud of yourself. You earned it.”

  “Credit Karma emailed me today. My score went up again.”

  “Hallelujah.”

  “I’m kind of obsessed with monitoring it. It just keeps rising, Rocco, every month. Sometimes twice a month!”

  “The magic of paying your bills on time.”

  “By the end of the year, I’ll never have to ask you to co-sign another loan again.”

  “Can I get an amen?”

  “Sometimes I get so scared at how well things are going. At how close I am to being able to dream even bigger than the big dream.”

  “What’s bigger than the big dream?”

  She took a deep breath, searching his eyes. A long silence went by as her gaze grew tenderer the longer she stared at him as if she couldn’t decide which part of his face was more beautiful.

  Her cheeks heated and her eyes fell to his place. “Nothing.”

  “Tell me.”

  “It’s nothing. The spa. Blue. You.” She swallowed thickly. “That’s the dream.”

  “There’s something more.”

  “Why don’t we just let life keep happening? Just stay the course… and maybe the dream even bigger than the biggest will come true on its own.”

  “Is it the kind of big dream he could give you?” This time it was his turn to push his food around on his plate, staring down at his fork and biting the inside of his mouth before he finally snuck a look at her from under the shadow of his browbone.

  Stella cocked her head back at the question.

  “The kind of big dream only a multi-millionaire could make come true?” His eyebrows jumped. “Not just some cop?”

  “Some cop?” she breathed. “Rocco, you’re not just some cop. You’re… you’re… words can’t even begin to describe how much more you are to me. To Blue. For god’s sake, she thinks you’re her father. She loves you so much. Do you have any idea how huge that is? How important that is to her, and will be to her, for the rest of her life?”

  “We managed to keep the house,” he said. “But I didn’t sell all your things after I moved in just to be an asshole. I didn’t do it to hurt your feelings. I did it because I’m not a multi-millionaire like he was. I’ll give you everything I have. I’ll give you the last quarter in my pocket, but the life you had before… I can’t…” His eyes lowered. “I can’t give you that. So if your biggest dream is bigger than—”

  “You’re my biggest dream, you idiot.”

  His eyes flew back up, fork stilling on his plate.

  “You, and me, and Blue, forever.” She slammed her eyes closed. “And now you’ve forced me to say it out loud. Probably already freaking out internally and searching for the nearest exit.”

  The corner of his mouth rose in a coy smile.

  She couldn’t help smiling back. “And I think you’re forgetting that Troy didn’t really give me everything at all. Discover did. And Chase. And Barclays. And American Express…”

  He chuckled.

  “And now they’ve come to collect. The chickens have come home to roost. It’s all come raining down on me like a pile of crap and buried me alive. I would’ve suffocated to death if you hadn’t swooped in, right in the nick of time like Spiderman.”

  “Spiderman, huh? You’re really working overtime to ease my fragile ego.”

  “You were kinda falling apart on me there for a second.”

  “I just know what you deserve.”

  “Rocco…” She paused, her eyebrows to pulling taut as she shook her head softly. “I’ll never hurt you.”

  Something moved in his eyes.

  “Ever,” she promised.

  As their eyes remained locked across the table, her breathing picked up until she was gasping softly. She saw his chest rising and falling in much the same way. The loving smile on his face seemed to vanish from his lips at the same time as hers, leaving an impassioned depth in his eyes. A depth that seemed to darken and spread all over his face liked a tidal wave, pulling every muscle under his skin to the brim like a statue that could shatter any moment.

  Her eyelids grew heavy, as well as her whispered voice. “I think I’m done eating.”

  He nodded, voice so low and gravely she barely heard it. “Yeah.”

  ——

  They barely made it to the elevators at their hotel before they couldn’t take it anymore. Hand-in-hand for the entire walk from the restaurant and back to their hotel, feeling each other’s rapid pulse’s booming through their palms, had proven just how much the other had been anticipating that moment, and that fact had made a 5-minute walk feel like five hours. By the time they’d smiled at the bellhop holding the door to their hotel open for them, they’d been all but speed-walked to the elevators, giving only cursory smiles to the fellow hotel patrons who passed them in the lobby. Stella had barely finished pressing her finger into the button for the elevators when Rocco had taken the back of her neck, pulling her in, and crushing his lips to hers.

  And her entire world was reduced to a blur. As their lips battled, she barely saw the mirrored walls of the elevators surrounding them through her hazy vision as they stumbled in, every inch of blood flowing to her pussy and rendering all her senses nearly useless. But not useless enough to miss the way her skin pulsed under every inch of her body that his big hands traveled as if every limb was at war for his attention, trying to lift from her skin and reach out to get under his splayed fingers.

  Those fingers of his blazed across her body, lighting fire with every part they touched. She gasped when her back hit the wall of the elevator as their tongues swept torridly between fervent kisses. Her pussy swelle
d between her legs, and before she knew it, her thigh was hiked up high on his hip, fingers digging into his rock-hard ass and pulling him between her legs. He gave her all his weight, his own gasping breath warming her skin as he moved his kisses from her mouth to the crook of her neck.

  She threw her head back, burying her clawed fingers into his hair. Her eyes moved to the mirror to her left as the sound of him sucking her skin filled the elevator loudly enough to drown out the sound of the doors beeping and sliding closed. As it began a slow climb toward their floor, her body began a slow climb toward explosion. The way his biceps clenched and pulsed under his t-shirt in the reflection, just like every muscle in her body was tensing and spasming as well, made her nipples go hard as a stone, rubbing torturously against the fabric of her dress, begging to be freed, licked, sucked…

  His muscled arms pulsed even deeper when he slid his hand up the thigh she had propped on his hip, pushing the hem of her dress higher every second, exposing more and more of her chocolate skin in the mirror until the white lace of her panties appeared. She lifted her thigh higher, silently begging for his big fingers to slip past the waistband of her panties and into the folds she could already tell were soaking wet.

  But his hands couldn’t seem to decide which part of her body they needed to touch more, traveling everywhere from her thighs to her hair to her waist to her ass and back up again, all while continuing to light a fire to her neck with his skilled lips and tongue.

  She gasped when his fiery touch found her heaving breasts and yanked down the neckline of her dress, exposing her dark brown nipples in the reflection before he drew it into the warm cavern of his mouth, his cheeks sinking in as he sucked the tender bud and rolled it around his tongue.

  “Rocco,” she gasped, digging her fingers into his hair and holding his head in place when the pleasure rocking through her made her every bone tremble. “God, that feels so good, please don’t stop.”

  He didn’t, releasing that nipple and moving to the other one to give it the same love, leaving the first one glistening in the reflection in the wake of his tongue’s attention.