This Time for Keeps

by Rochelle Alers

  Nicole felt as if he was trying to draw a response from her. Interacting with the mature Fletcher Austen made her aware that he was a very complex man; that he wasn’t easy to know. She had found him direct and forthcoming, yet it was what he didn’t say that had her attempting to analyze a part of him that he kept hidden from her.

  She knew he’d liked her enough to ask her to prom, and over the years, she’d asked herself why, when he could have taken any girl in their school who wasn’t coupled up with another boy. “You’re a good catch, Fletcher, and I’m sure you’ll find that special woman who will become your wife and the mother of your children.”

  A hint of a smile tilted the corners of his mouth. “Thanks for the vote of confidence.”

  Nicole also smiled. “There’s no need to thank me. You’ve got what it takes, so just own it.” She wondered how her life, their lives, would have changed if she had accepted Fletcher’s invitation to be his prom date. Would they have kept in touch with each other during their time in the military? Would he have become her first lover? Would she, eventually, have become his wife and the mother of their children?

  She shook her head as if to rid her thoughts of anything that resembled permanence with Fletcher. She had agreed to date him and had not ruled out sleeping with him, but that was where it would end. Nicole was determined not to let her heart overrule her head as it had in the past when she’d fallen in love with a man she could not have because he’d belonged to another woman.

  “How many bedrooms do you have?” Nicole asked Fletcher as he led her down the hallway.

  “Three. The master and two guest bedrooms.”

  Enough for a couple and their two or three children, she thought. It was obvious Fletcher had planned for his future, while hers was in limbo. She did not regret having to step in and become temporary guardian for her nephews because not only had they lost their mother, but their father was also in crisis. She had reminded Reggie that she would remain in Wickham Falls for as long as it took for him to get clean, so there was no need to concern himself about the well-being of his sons. After all, she did not have a job waiting for her, she was able to pay the maintenance on her condo online and her mother had made it a practice to check on her town home at least once a week.

  Nicole walked into Fletcher’s bedroom and went completely still. Pale blue-gray walls provided the backdrop for a king-size bed with a quilted headboard in a smoky gray. Muted hues of white, blue and gray dominated window shutters, bed dressings, the geometric patterns on the armchairs and the padded bench seat at the foot of the bed. Solid-colored throw pillows accentuated the furnishings. The expansive suite also included a bathroom with a double vanity, garden tub with Jacuzzi, shower stall and a private alcove for the commode and bidet. The skylight over the tub area provided a canopy of light for the entire space.

  The two smaller bedrooms were just as impressive. One with a full-size and single bed, and the other with twin beds; both claimed en suite baths. Furnishings in monochromatic shades of pinks and blues identified spaces for his nieces and nephews. She’d noticed that all the rooms had window shutters, gas fireplaces, ceiling fans and walk-in closets, while the guest rooms had area rugs, love seats and armchairs.

  She was equally impressed with the living, dining and family rooms on the first floor. The door from the garage led into a mud/laundry room with a connecting fully stocked pantry. Fletcher had set up an alcove outside the kitchen as a home/office/library. She noted many of the subjects of the books lining built-in shelves included business, finance, accounting and automobiles. The talented decorator had created the perfect template for sophisticated, casual family living.

  Nicole smothered a gasp of surprise when she walked into the outdoor kitchen with its six-burner grill, wood-burning pizza oven, sink, refrigerator, barbecue pit, smoker and firepit. The outdoor dining table with six driftwood wicker chairs, along with a matching love seat, chaise, ottoman and coffee table sat on an indoor/outdoor rug stamped with pine leaves was conducive to outdoor relaxing and entertaining. A collection of glass hurricane lanterns lined the wall enclosing the patio, while ferns and succulents overflowed from terra-cotta planters. She opened the door in a corner of the patio to discover the bathroom with a vanity sink and commode.

  Nicole folded her body down to the Haitian cotton cushion on the chaise, wiggling her bare toes. The patio was the ideal place to begin or end the day. “I could hang out here for hours.”

  Fletcher sat next to her, reached over and eased her legs across his thigh. “You can come and hang out here whenever you want,” he said, repeating what she’d similarly told him about coming to her home to eat.

  “I hope when you bring your nephews over that y’all will plan to spend the night.”

  She sat straight. “Is that what you want?”

  He nodded. “It’s what I’d like. Once we begin to play board games, it may go on for hours.”

  “Which games are you talking about?”

  “When I asked Luke and Danny which board games, they said Monopoly, Uno and Sequence.”

  “That’s because we usually play games after dinner on Sundays.”

  Fletcher massaged her instep, sending shivers up and down her spine. “I have Monopoly and Uno, but not Sequence. I went online and ordered Sequence, dominoes and a checkers and chess board. My siblings and I were very competitive when it came to board games. We’d chart our wins and losses on a chalkboard. My brother was the chess champ and my sister was right behind him in checkers. I became the all-around Monopoly champion because I’d memorized the board and knew how much money they had to buy properties.”

  “Isn’t that the same as counting cards? Which, by the way, is a no-go at casinos.”

  Fletcher angled his head. “It wasn’t about how I won, but that I’d won.”

  Nicole’s jaw dropped. “No, you didn’t say that.”

  “I didn’t cheat, Nikki. I just used whatever skills I had to win. Do you remember Louis Brown?”

  She nodded. “He was our valedictorian.”

  “Louis tried to hide it, but he had an eidetic memory. He could recall everything he saw or read. He’d become a walking encyclopedia and, after a while, the teachers stopped calling on him because he knew all the answers. I don’t have an eidetic memory, but if I see the same thing over and over, I’m able to remember it.”

  Nicole narrowed her eyes. “I hope you don’t scam my nephews when playing Monopoly.”

  “How do you know they won’t scam me?” Fletcher countered.

  “My nephews are not scammers!” she said in defense of the boys.

  Fletcher tightened his hold on her feet as she went completely still. “Whoa! Easy, Mama Bear. I meant no harm. I’m sorry.”

  The stiffness went out of her body and it was a full minute before Nicole could bring herself to accept Fletcher’s apology. “I forgive you.”

  * * *

  Fletcher realized he had made a serious faux pas. He was forced to remember their special circumstances. And he had to continually remind himself of their tragedies. Leaning over, he pressed a kiss to her cheek. “I am really sorry, Nikki. I’m going inside to brew some coffee. Would you like to have some?”

  “Yes, please.”

  “Do you want to come inside or drink it out here?”

  Nicole’s expression softened, the lashes that had shadowed her high cheekbones flying up. Rays from the sun fell over her delicate face, causing Fletcher’s breath to catch in his lungs. At that moment there was something about her that appeared almost angelic. Her large dark eyes, round face, pert nose and lushly curved mouth reminded him of several of his sister’s favorite dolls.

  Fletcher had told himself that he liked Nicole Campos, but that was only a half-truth. Yes, he did like her but the more time he spent with her, the more he realized he was falling in love with her. Everything about Nicole appealed to him: h
er natural beauty, intelligence, confidence and her unwavering loyalty to those she loved. He’d wanted to ask her about the men in her life, yet hadn’t wanted to bring up something that would put a wall between them.

  He released her feet and stood. “Regular or decaf?”

  “Regular, please.”

  “Is milk and sugar okay?”

  Nicole’s head popped up and she smiled. “Both.”

  Fletcher nodded. “I’ll be back.” He returned to the house and walked into the kitchen. The day had been filled with pleasant surprises. He knew he had shocked a few guys at the Den when he’d entered with Nicole, because it was the first time since he’d returned to The Falls as a civilian that he had come to the restaurant with a woman. When Dwight Adams had mentioned he was keeping Nicole company to stave off guys attempting to hit on his girlfriend, Fletcher had no intention of denying she was his girlfriend.

  Despite agreeing to go out with him, Fletcher wondered if Nicole would be willing to take their friendship to another level. The question wasn’t “Would she?” It was more “Would he be content to share a bed with Nicole and then remain unaffected when it came time for her to leave?”

  He washed his hands and filled the coffee grinder with beans as he contemplated whether it would be best if they had a strictly platonic relationship. He knew he was overthinking something that would never materialize and decided to let things unfold naturally. Every other weekend he would get together with Nicole and her nephews and on the off weekends it would be just the two of them.

  He brewed two cups of coffee, added turbinado sugar and foamed milk, and carried them to the patio. He handed one to Nicole. “One café au lait for the lady.”

  Smiling, she held it with both hands. “Oh, I think I’m going to keep you around for a while. It smells delicious.”

  Fletcher sat close to Nicole and stretched out his legs. “I’m not quite a barista, but after I bought the espresso machine, I experimented making lattes and cappuccinos.”

  Nicole touched her cup to his before putting it to her mouth. “How did they come out?” she asked after taking a sip.

  He lifted broad shoulders. “Okay.”

  “Just okay?”

  Fletcher took a sip from his cup. “The only thing I’m going to say is that I’m a work in progress. I’m much better at making s’mores using the firepit.”

  Nicole’s eyes lit up like a child’s on Christmas morning when seeing gaily wrapped presents under the tree. “Did you say s’mores?”

  “Yes, I did. Why?”

  “They are my favorite dessert snack.”

  “I don’t have all the ingredients on hand, but the next time you come, I’ll definitely make them for you.”

  She held out her little finger. “Pinky swear?”

  Fletcher ignored her finger, slanted his head and kissed her parted lips. “Yes.”

  Nicole lowered her eyes and ran the tip of her tongue over her lips, bringing his gaze to linger there. Shifting slightly, he managed to put a modicum of space between them as he sipped his coffee.

  The smell of freshly mowed grass lingered in the air. He had gotten up at dawn to cut the grass before it got too hot. His house sat on a quarter of an acre and, after he’d erected a fence, Fletcher was afforded complete privacy from his nearest neighbors.

  “How often do you sit out here?” Nicole asked.

  “Not often enough,” Fletcher admitted. “I come home and make dinner for myself then veg out in front the television to catch up on the news and sporting events.”

  “When do you work on your cars?”

  He turned to stare at her. “I leave that for the weekends.”

  “And now we’re intruding on your weekends.”

  “Do you hear me complaining, Nikki? I don’t have a timetable when I have to complete restoring the Studebaker because my rep hasn’t found a buyer. Once he calls and tells me someone wants it, I’ll devote a lot more time to getting it ready. Is there anything else you’d like to know about me?” Fletcher asked when she stared straight ahead.

  “Yes,” Nicole said after a pregnant pause.

  “What is it?”

  “Why me, Fletcher? Why are you hanging out with me when there a lot of other women in Wickham Falls you could be with?”

  He set his half-empty cup on the coffee table and gave her an incredulous stare. “You wait until now to ask me that?”

  “Yes.”

  Fletcher shook his head as he crossed his arms over his chest. “Did it ever dawn on you that if I’d wanted to be with another woman, it would’ve happened before you returned to Wickham Falls?”

  “Yes, but—”

  “But nothing, Nicole,” he snapped, cutting her off. “Do you always attempt to sabotage your relationships even before they begin?”

  She pressed her lips together in what he interpreted as anger. “Who said anything about a relationship?”

  Fletcher was annoyed with Nicole. It was as if she’d turned the clock back more than seventeen years. “Should I have used liaison instead of relationship?”

  Nicole stared at him, unblinking. “Liaison is better than relationship.”

  He wanted to remind Nicole that Dwight had already referred to her as his girlfriend and she hadn’t seemed bothered by it. “Just what is it you’re afraid of, Nikki?” His voice was low and soothing. “What happened between you and the man you loved and lost?”

  “I never had him.”

  Fletcher moved closer, took the cup from her hand and set it beside his on the coffee table. He effortlessly shifted her to sit across his lap. “Tell me about it, sweetheart.”

  Chapter Eight

  Nicole opened her mouth but no sound came out. It was as if her throat had constricted, because shame and embarrassment had temporarily rendered her mute. “I got involved with a married man and it almost cost me my commission.”

  She told Fletcher about the lifer master sergeant who’d sought her out to talk about the anxiety he was experiencing following a number of deployments. She had urged him to talk to the base’s psychiatrist, but he was afraid they would deem him unfit for service and recommend a medical discharge.

  “How many years did he have in?” Fletcher asked.

  “Twenty-one. He was trying for thirty, but I knew he would never make it because he was experiencing PTSD. He had a wife, six kids and several grandchildren living together and depending on his allotments.”

  Fletcher tightened his hold around Nicole’s body. “That’s a lot of responsibility for one man to shoulder.”

  She nodded. “That was the root cause of his anxiety. He had become their personal ATM and every time he got an email from them it was always about money. I’d become his shoulder to cry on and, before I knew it, we had bonded emotionally.”

  “Were you in love with him, Nikki?”

  She nodded. “I loved him, but I wasn’t in love with him. One morning my commanding officer summoned me to his office and read me the riot act about fraternizing with an enlistee. He said if it did not stop, I would face court-martial. That’s when I knew I had to cut him off cold.”

  “What happened after that?”

  “He’d signed up for his fifth deployment and was killed when he stepped on an IED. There was a lot of controversy surrounding his death because the incendiary explosive device had been uncovered and they were waiting for the bomb squad to disarm it.”

  “Are you saying he committed suicide so his family would get his death benefit?”

  Easing back, Nicole met Fletcher’s eyes. “I know he did. I got a letter from him after he’d been shipped out that said in so many words that he loved me and that he was also was going to solve his family’s financial problems. I burned the letter because I didn’t want anyone to find it and jeopardize his family getting his death allowance. He was given a military f
uneral with full honors befitting a hero and buried at Arlington National Cemetery. His passing bothered me for a long time because I thought I hadn’t done enough to help him.”

  Nicole had continued to second-guess herself on the anniversary of his death when she should’ve reported him either to the chaplain or the psychiatrist for counseling. The pressure of providing financial support and becoming an enabler for his adult children, who’d refused to seek gainful employment, had overwhelmed him. He’d believed suicide was his only way to remedy the situation.

  Fletcher dropped a kiss on her hair. “You can’t beat yourself up about something over which you had no control.”

  “I know that now.” Nicole didn’t want to admit to Fletcher that the incident had impacted her subsequent relationships with men. She refused to listen to them complain about ex-wives or girlfriends, demanding bosses or clashes with their children. She didn’t dump on them about her problems and she had made it known she did not want to hear about theirs.

  “How well did you get along with Othello’s handler?”

  Nicole smiled, grateful that she no longer had to talk about her involvement with a man she’d loved for the wrong reason. “Keith and I were in NROTC together. We managed to keep in touch even after graduation. He applied to SEAL school and made it. His birthday is coming up mid-October and I’ve committed to drive to Kentucky to help him celebrate. I plan to take the boys and Othello with me.”

  “Othello will probably be happy to see him again.”

  “It will be the first time they see each other since I adopted him, and there’s no doubt it will be a wonderful reunion for both.” Nicole paused and then said, “If you’re not busy, would you like to come with us? His sister says he spends a lot of time alone and I think he would appreciate talking to someone who can relate to what he’s been through.”

  “You have to let me know when and how long you plan to stay.”

  “Rachel has made plans for us to stay overnight. If you do decide to come, you’ll have to pack your jammies.”