by Celeste King
“David, come sit by me!” said Joan’s new nemesis. Joan turned and looked at David, sure he wasn’t going to break tradition and go sit with, who was sure to be, someone not even close to good enough for him. To her shock and horror he turned on his heel and started up the stairs to the back. Joan absolutely couldn’t believe it. Her plan had been perfect! How could he ruin it like this! She turned and looked blankly down at her notebook feeling defeated. It was over. She had waited too long. No, she thought, no. I am too special and too amazing for him to just pass me over like that. With one swift movement, Joan stood up, flattened out her skirt and walked forcefully to the back of the room. She came to a stop directly in front of David’s new desk.
“Well, hey,” David said flashing the smile that always made Joan speechless.
“No,” Joan said in a confidant tone. “Don’t smile at me. I have something to ask you and you can’t smile at me.” David tried to erase his smile, but had to fight the corners of his mouth as he was very amused by Joan’s forwardness. “You and I are going to get some ice cream together after class,” continued Joan.
“Ok,” David said still not smiling.
“And it will be fun,” Joan added, afterwards feeling it was a weird thing to say.
“Absolutely,” David agreed.
“Ok, then,” Joan said and realized she had no idea how to end this conversation. “Goodbye.” She stuck out her hand for a handshake and David obliged. As she turned to go back to her seat she caught the eye of the beautiful woman sitting next to David. The woman’s mouth was hanging open in disbelief. Joan triumphantly smiled and marched back to her desk. She was unable to focus in that class either.
Of course, the rest was history and it had been a very successful ice cream date. The memory was quick in Joan’s mind as she continued to pace the living room floor, but ceased biting her nails.
Beth had taken her backpack, but that could have meant any number of things. She loved the outdoors so much, but it was impossible to pinpoint exactly where she would go. The urgency Joan felt to find Beth grew stronger.
Joan tried to think of who she could contact. She didn’t know Eric’s parents or even his phone number. She realized she wasn’t entirely sure of where he lived. It was such an oversight for her as a parent. She was typically so involved with who Beth was spending time with. The circumstances with David had really caused her to stop paying attention, understandably so.
Suddenly the name of Beth’s best friend popped into Joan’s mind. She also realized she hadn’t seen Josie in a long time, several months in fact. Beth and Josie had met in kindergarten and had been in the same classes every year since. Josie was a good friend to Beth and was constantly over at their house for dinner or activities. Joan tried to think of the last time Josie had been over and she knew it was well before David’s passing, possibly even before they found the cancer. Joan thought if anyone would know where Beth was, it would be Josie. She went to her bedroom and picked up her cell phone. Joan made it a habit of saving Beth’s friends’ numbers in case of an emergency. She had never been more grateful for this practice.
The phone rang twice and Josie picked up. “Mrs. Benson?” Josie answered. Joan wondered for a Moment how Josie could have known it was her, but then realized it was likely Josie had saved her number as well. She still wasn’t entirely used to people knowing instantly who was calling when they looked as their cell phone screens.
“Josie, hi sweetheart,” said Joan, trying to keep the panic down in her voice. “I haven’t seen you in so long and I want to catch up, but I have an important question for you. I’m looking for Beth and just a little while ago she drove away with Eric. Would you have any idea where they might have gone?”
“Honestly, Mrs. Benson, Beth doesn’t tell me much anymore.” Joan could hear the hurt feelings through the phone. Josie continued, “I wish I could help you, but Beth hasn’t been too quick to talk to me, especially about Eric. We had a little bit of an argument a few months ago.”
“What about?” Joan couldn’t understand why Beth hadn’t mentioned a falling out with her dearest and longest friend.
“Well…” Josie hesitated. “I told her I didn’t like Eric very much and she got really angry. Something about him just doesn’t feel right, but Beth told me I was just being jealous. Honestly, Mrs. Benson, I’m not jealous. I would always be very happy for Beth to find someone. It just worries me.” Joan felt her anxiety rise again. It wasn’t just her motherly instincts. Josie was feeling uneasy about Eric too. Josie added, “I do know before we had our argument the two of them were going on a lot of hikes together. I don’t really know where, but that seemed to always be what they were doing.”
“Thank you so much Josie,” said Joan quickly. “And I hope that you and Beth can solve your argument. I would hate for her to lose you as a friend. Can I ask what made you have a bad feeling about Eric?”
“Well, he has kind of a reputation at school,” Josie said hesitantly. “I’ve heard girls say that they’ve been on dates with them and he tries to get them to go too far, you know…” Joan understood all too well. Josie continued, “There’s a rumor that he won’t even go out with the popular girls anymore because they always tell him no. He tends to find girls that want to be popular, that will do things to look cool. I think Beth is smarter than that though, Mrs. Benson. I think she’s just caught up in dating a football player.”
“I really appreciate your honesty with me, Josie,” said Joan, feeling more panicked than ever. “I’ve been thinking it’s time for her to stop seeing Eric and this just helps me know that’s the best decision.”
“I agree Mrs. Benson. Let me know if I can be of any help. I’ll talk to you soon.”
Joan hung up the phone with her stomach in knots. It made sense that they would be out hiking since it was one of Beth’s favorite pastimes. The problem was, even if Beth and Eric were hiking, Joan still had no idea where they were.
~ Chapter 8 ~
Today’s hike was an easy one so Eric and Beth had a lot of time to stop and look at different flowers, trees, and creatures that came across their path. It wasn’t a well-known area so they were completely alone. It occurred to Beth that Eric always managed to find really secluded hikes. It was common that they were the only two on the trail. She hadn’t noticed any other cars parked below. All they could hear was the rustle in the trees and tweeting of birds. These were typically very calming sounds to Beth, but she couldn’t relax. She was still reeling from her argument at breakfast, but there was something else making her feel uneasy. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it. She knew one conversation with her Dad would have calmed her nerves.
Beth’s mind raced back to the first writing competition she had ever entered. Although her parents had let her try many things, writing always had a special place in her heart. When she was in the fifth grade her teacher announced an essay contest for the entire school district. The topic was “How My Teacher Has Changed My Life For The Better”. Sitting in class, Beth looked at her teacher announcing the contest, Mrs. Bates. Mrs. Bates had made such a difference to Beth this year.
Beth had a tendency to be very shy in elementary school, painfully so. She spent most of her time with her closest friend, Josie, but other than that she struggled to open up and make more friends. It wasn’t that no one liked Beth. She was nice to everyone and always wanted others to be happy, but she had a difficult time putting herself in unfamiliar social situations. At recess her and Josie would swing together or hopscotch, but when Josie suggested they join an impromptu kickball game Beth would make an excuse as to why she couldn’t play, but insist Josie go on without her.
Joan and David would meet with Beth’s teachers throughout the years coming up with ideas on how to get Beth to be a little more social. Her teachers would challenge her to make one new friend a week or put herself in uncomfortable situations like asking to play with a group of kids on the monkey bars. Beth just couldn’t bring herself to do it. When Be
th entered the fifth grade Mrs. Bates had already been prepped by frustrated teachers on little, shy Beth and their efforts to fix her social problems.
“Fix her?” Mrs. Bates had wondered. “What do you mean fix her?”
“Well, yes, she must have more friends,” the other teachers would say.
“Well, maybe she’s just particular about who her friends are,” responded Mrs. Bates. “I’m sure she’s a wonderful child who understands the value of a few good friends instead of a lot of acquaintances.” Mrs. Bates was the first teacher to treat Beth just like everyone else. Beth wasn’t a project in the classroom anymore. She didn’t feel pressured to do things that caused her anxiety. She was able to relax, learn, and enjoy school. The more she relaxed the more she found games out on the playground more intriguing. She began to be the one suggesting her and Josie join in with other kids. Mrs. Bates watched as the other children in class got to know Beth and loved her. Even at the age of 10, Beth understood that the way Mrs. Bates treated her made it possible for her to love school.
As she sat listening to Mrs. Bates talk about the contest she knew she had to participate, which made her nervous. She had gotten better at making friends, but when Mrs. Bates said the finalists would have to read their essays in front of judges and the entire school district she wasn’t sure she wanted to risk it. As she left school that day Mrs. Bates stopped her at the doorway and handed her a piece of paper.
“These are the rules for the essay contest,” Mrs. Bates explained. “With your writing talents you must enter. Take this home and discuss it with your parents.”
“Ok,” agreed Beth. When she walked in the door from school she immediately sat at the kitchen table studying the rules to the contest. David walked in to find her quietly sitting, which wasn’t typical when she arrived home from school. Lately, she was excited to tell him and Joan all about the exciting things that had happened that day. He noticed a concerned look on Beth’s face.
“What’s eatin’ ya, princess?” David said and sat down next to Beth at the table.
“Well, Dad,” Beth started, “there’s this writing contest at school.”
“Oh, good!” David exclaimed. “You’re so good at writing, you’ll blow them all away!” Beth smiled. Her Dad was her number one fan and never questioned her ability to do anything.
“Thanks, Dad,” Beth hesitated. “But if I’m a finalist, I have to read the essay to the entire school district. And judges!”
“Well, do you think that’s a good enough reason to not try?” David asked. He felt it important for Beth to reason through the problem herself.
“I don’t think so, but it makes me really nervous,” said Beth.
“I’ll tell you what,” said David. “You write your essay and put your heart and soul into it so it’s something you’re proud of. Then we can start practicing in case you’re a finalist. You can start with Mom and me. Then we can invite over grandpa and grandma and maybe Sandy. You can read it to them to get some practice. We’ll invite over as many people as you want until you feel like a room full of judges will be no problem” Josie thought about this idea for a minute and read over the rules one more time. She finally agreed.
“But, Dad,” she said, “You have to promise to be there if I have to read it to the judges.”
“Oh, don’t you worry about that honey. Nothing could stop me.” David smiled down at his daughter feeling so proud. Josie ran to her room and immediately got to work. She wrote her essay in just a few days and began practicing to herself in the mirror. When she was ready to read it to her Mom and Dad, they set up the dining room chairs in the living room and included a selection of Beth’s stuffed animals for a bigger audience. Beth read it for her grandparents the night before it was time to submit the essay.
“I’m so excited for you,” Mrs. Bates said as Beth handed her essay in. “I have a good feeling about this.” Beth realized Mrs. Bates didn’t even know the essay was about her.
Beth felt confident enough to read her essay for Sandy and some other neighbors before the results were announced in class. She held her breath as Mrs. Bates read the finalists for the whole district. Beth could hardly believe her ears when “Beth Benson” came out of Mrs. Bates mouth. She ran home and into her Mom and Dad’s arms. They celebrated with a sundae party and Beth thought of several more people she could practice in front of.
The day came for the finalists to read their essays in front of the judges. Many teachers, parents, and students gathered in the nearby high school gymnasium to listen to the essays. The finalists had to sit in chairs on the stage and take turns going up to a microphone facing the audience. There were ten finalists total and Beth was the ninth in line. She listened as the other students read their essays. She began to feel panicked thinking her essay couldn’t measure up to those that had gone before her. Before she knew it, it was Beth’s turn. With knees and hands shaking she walked up to the microphone. She stood in silence for a few Moments then looked down at her essay. She was so nervous it might as well have been written in a foreign language. She looked out into the audience and found her Mom and Dad. They were smiling at her looking completely calm. Her Dad gave her a thumbs-up and she felt more confident than she had been reading it for her stuffed animals in the living room. With her best speaking voice, Beth began to read her essay. The audience listened intently until the end when they clapped loudly for her. Beth went back to her seat and looked at her Mom and Dad who were beaming. Then she saw Mrs. Bates sitting off to the side. She had tears on her cheeks and smiled at Beth. She mouthed the words, thank you, to Beth. She smiled back and was so happy Mrs. Bates knew the difference she had made to her.
The time came for announcing the winner and to no one’s surprise Beth’s name was called. It was a wonderful Moment in her young life and one she would never forget. Her parents took her out for dinner and let her pick any movie she wanted to see. She often thought about her Dad giving her a thumbs-up from the crowd whenever she was nervous or feeling frustrated. Just the thought of his encouragement always gave her the courage she needed. Her thoughts were abruptly interrupted.
“So what are you going to say to your Mom when you get home?” Eric asked. Beth was a little irritated by the fact that Eric kept bringing up the subject of the argument from this morning. She had said multiple times she was done talking about it, but he continued to prod. He had a keen ability of pushing her buttons sometimes, but she didn’t want to upset him by getting mad. She just couldn’t ruin this dream situation of dating a football player in high school.
“Eric, really, I don’t want to talk about it,” responded Beth in the sweetest voice she could muster, “I just want to have a nice day with you.” Beth’s stomach started to growl. The start of their hike was a half hour drive from her home and she guessed they had been on the trail at least an hour or so. They had been taking their time with a lot of stops so what was supposed to be a twenty-minute hike had taken a lot longer. She always seemed to get hungry quickly when they were hiking.
“Are you ready to eat somewhere?” asked Beth.
“Yeah, that sounds like a great idea,” said Eric and they resolved to stop at the next visible clearing.
They walked for another fifteen minutes and spotted a clearing surrounded by tall trees. The light was perfectly filtered through the leaves and it seemed like such a peaceful place to have lunch. Beth took a deep breath and tried to shake the anxieties she was feeling. She had this strange urge to be back home in her own room, writing. She hadn’t written in so long. It had been such a joy to her, but Eric had called it geeky. She had showed him some of her poems one time, but he laughed and said poems were dumb. Beth had felt so embarrassed even showing him her poems that she never did again. She didn’t want him to think she was a geek because he might dump her if he did. So, she had almost stopped writing completely. Beth hadn’t even realized what an outlet it had been for her. Being able to get her words out on paper had almost been therapeutic and she had just
gone through one of the hardest parts surely of her entire past and future life. She had so much she wanted to write about her Dad and being in the hospital. Beth decided she would start writing again and just not share it with anyone, especially Eric.
She was brought out of her thoughts by the touch of Eric taking her hand and leading her to their picnic spot. They walked to the middle of the clearing and Beth pulled a blanket out of her backpack. It was the bright blue blanket her Dad had always packed whenever the family went hiking or picnicking. She was sure that was why she wanted to hike so much lately. It really made things feel like before the cancer. She flung the blanket out across the grass.
“Will you help me spread it out?” she asked Eric. He had been fiddling with something in his backpack, but stopped to help her make the blanket smooth across the grass. Beth turned to her backpack and set the sandwiches, that she had made the night before, out on the blanket. It was Eric’s favorite of ham and cheddar cheese with sprouts. She really didn’t care for sprouts, she preferred lettuce, but the last time she had put lettuce on the sandwiches Eric pouted and wouldn’t eat anything.
“I brought some chips too, but they’re a little bit smashed,” said Beth apologetically. “Oh shoot. And I forgot the candy bars for dessert.” She turned to Eric worried he might be disappointed with her.
“Don’t worry, baby,” said Eric with a smile. “I have something for dessert.”
“Oh, really?” asked Beth with the same coy smile. He had never surprised her with anything before. It really made her feel special. They proceeded to eat their lunch and listen to nature around them. They talked about the upcoming school year and made plans for what they would do on the weekends. They talked about Eric’s sports teams and what his plans were for college and what would happen if he got a scholarship. Beth loved that he always talked about the future with her included. He always made it sound like their relationship would never end. Beth thought about how romantic it would be to go to the same college and cheer for him on the football team, then get married and have babies while her husband played professional football. What a beautiful life it would be. Maybe she wouldn’t even need to finish college. If her Mom ever heard her say that she would be furious. Beth thought about all of the times Joan stressed an education. She would reiterate the same points about having skills and being independent.