by Cilla Lee
“What the fuck?” I turn the dress over in my hands, if I bend over you'd be able to see everything (shit) tears fall down my cheeks and I want to scream (why was my life so fucking shit). I wash and shave everything while I'm in the shower, washing my hair twice and condition it three times, anything to prolong putting that dress on (bang bang bang)
“Hurry the fuck up Niya people are waiting” my dad yells through the door and I know I can't put him off any more. I blow dry my hair and slide the dress over my body, it's tight in all the places that make a woman stand out, it's so tight and I feel embarrassed humiliated and just shocked. Every curve of my body on display for a man to ogle at, I slide the shoes on and stand. I wobble on the heels having never worn heels before and look down at my body (god I hate my father) I look in the mirror and cringe the bruises are still visible but there’s nothing I can do to change that, I brush my hair and open the door to my father standing there waiting.
“Good turn around” I slowly turn almost falling over in the stripper heels
“You got anything on under that” I nod my head (yeah, no way I'd come out with no panties on)
“Take'em off” I shake my head at him starting to panic
“I can't people will see me”
“I don't give a fuck now take'em off” he yells and I slowly pull down my underwear and ball them in my hand, he grabs my wrist pulling my underwear out of my hand and throwing them into the bathroom and pulls me out the door to the car. I tug on his arm trying to stop him but he pulls me harder shoving me into the front seat and slamming the door.
“Where are we going” I ask him trying to pull down the dress to cover my naked private parts
“To pay off my debt” I feel my nose tingle with the threat of tears
“Please don't do this” I beg him, but he ignores me (I've seen memories of a geisha) so I know why I look like this, he turns and looks at me
“I'm......I'm... look I just....it was you or me Niya and I choose me” he says and I frown at him I know I’ve never really meant much to my father but this, selling me to pay a debt is just unfair why should I pay for him a man who has done nothing but treat me like a slave and a punching bag.
“Please” I try and plead with him but he just ignores me. We drive for a good forty minutes when we pull up to a huge warehouse, I turn to look at my father again
“Please dad don’t do this” he shakes his head
“I have to”
“You’re just giving me to the bikers” He turns to look at me again “when we get in there, you do what Spyder says to you, you hear me”
“Please don't I'll get a job I'll help pay the debt... just don't do this.... please” I beg starting to cry but he shakes his head again
“I have to, there ganna kill me Niya”
“But I thought you had two months”
“Spyder's called in the debt”
“Why?”
“I DON'T FUCKIN' KNOW HE'S FUCKIN' CRAZY”
“And you’re just going to give me to them there going to rape me use me probably sell me aren’t you even concerned about that”
“Just fuckin' move” he goes to open his doors when blue and red flashing lights appear screeching tyres. I watch as people start screaming and running in all directions, police officers pull guns out screaming men in all black with huge guns start screaming at people to get on the ground. It’s like watching a Bad Boys movie only in real life.
“FUCK” my dad yells hitting the steering wheel “FUCK FUCK FUCK” he yells louder, we sit and watch as one by one people are lead out in handcuffs and put into the back of a police van
“FUCK” he yells again and puts the car in drive and we head back home. I lay in bed that night thanking all the gods of the world Quetzalcoati the Aztec god of learning, Thoth the Egyptian god of wisdom and magic. Frigg the Norse god of the sky marriage and motherhood Buddha, Mother Nature fucking Santa Claus and of cause God, Jesus and even the fucking Easter bunny. I thanked them all that night for intervening. (maybe mom was looking out for me as well)
**
The week flies by and I spend most of my time in my room trying to be invisible, not wanting to give my father anymore reasons to try and pimp me out or hit me. I'd caught up on my school work the bruising had turned a lighter shade of purple, my eye was now an ugly shade of light green and yellow, but at least there was no damage and I could still see out of it so that was something. The hand print was still present and my arm felt better even breathing was better now without flinching with every breath. Dad walks in from work smelling like fish and I instantly cringe the smell sickens me but thankfully he heads straight to the bathroom.
“Niya I'm hungry make me some dinner” he says as he comes back out.
I make my way to the kitchen and fry up some stakes and fries, as he sits at the table I know I have to sit there and watch him eat just in case he needs something from the fridge or the cupboard. He wouldn't want to get up and get it for himself, so I sit there in silence while he eats and wait for his commands like a friggin' lap dog. When he's done I wash up and head to bed hearing him settle into his chair and turn the TV on. I lock my door not sure why one kick would have it open, but it gives me a little comfort not much but some knowing its locked. (only six more weeks)
Chapter Two
Tobias
Joining the Devils Soldiers was always a dream becoming a Prospect a year ago was the best day of my life wanting to be a part of the club and the brotherhood was a wish I always wanted since I meet Beau and his dad Tiny when I was ten.
Watching the guys how they cared and respected one another was something that I wanted to be a part of, my dad was not one of those men who hung out with you on the weekends or played ball with you, no he was one of those dads that went to work than came home turned the TV on and sat on his ass while my mom ran around and done everything.
Watching Tiny and the guys was the sort of man I wanted to be and nobody and nothing was ganna stop me from joining the club, I still remember the day we asked Razor if we could be Prospects
It was at one of the family BBQ's that the club had a couple of times a year when Beau and I had approached Razor
“You two wanna be Prospects huh” Razor asked us, both of nodding in unison
“Yes, Sir we do”
“You’re what seventeen now”
“Yes sir” we answer
“I tell you what if you both still feel the same way by the time your eighteen I'll make you both Prospects right then and their deal” we both look at each other and nod
“Deal” we both say and I want to jump for joy
“Alright go on and enjoy the party” that was the longest fuckin' year of my life and when I turned eighteen I still had to wait for Beau to turn eighteen thankfully he was only two months younger than me, anymore and I would have gone ahead and joined before him.
**
Within the year of us Prospecting Razor had gotten the club into legitimate businesses, first starting a Strip club which the club named Pink Slip then more and more legitimate businesses were opened, a Bar they named the Devils Den it was more of a nightclub than a bar. Than an Auto Body Repair shop was opened and of course that was named after the club as well Devils Repairs. The club was happy with the money from all of the businesses it gave the guys a steady income and more security. When the club opened the Devils Repairs Beau and I decided to get an apprenticeship there, Tucker took us on no problem and even though we would have worked for free we got paid a good amount which was a bonus cause now I could save for a better bike. Our first night as Prospects was a blast we got so wasted it was fuckin’ epic, not so much the next morning when we were the ones that had to clean the clubhouse from top to bottom, but fuck it was fuckin' outer this world.
Prospecting was hard as fuck we survived on energy drinks and coffee when we were told to do somethin' we did it, we cleaned when we were told, we drove everywhere picked shit up here and there, dropped shit off helpe
d out whoever needed helping out and done all the shit jobs you could imagine and I fuckin' loved every minute of it, Beau was the same and even though he was a members kid he still had to do all the shit just the same as me, we both worked our asses off for the club and never once did we complain about it, we were in our element parties pussy and more fuckin' pussy who wouldn't love that shit.
Chapter Three
Niya
As I was walking home from the corner store I noticed a moving van parked on the street and a couple of kids running around screaming, I watched as the movers carried furniture into the house and I slowed my pace watching but trying not to be nosy when I walked straight into a woman
“Shit I'm so sorry” I said to her
“It’s ok” she looks me up and down and I feel the instant cringe, I always feel embarrassed when people look especially with all the bruises I had, I knew exactly what she's thinking yep I look like a homeless person not dirty or smelly but with clothes at least four sizes too big and bruises that made me look scary
“I wasn't watching where I was going sorry” I told her
“No problem, are you ok?” she asked me and I nod
“Yeah I'm good”
“Are you sure?” she asks and I know the bruises look horrible and I pull my shirt up
“I'm good honestly”
“Do you live close?” I nod
“Just a few blocks up” I nod my head in the direction of the house and she looks up, she sticks out her hand “Mary”
“Sorry”
“My names Mary” she says smiling
“Oh, I'm Niya”
“Niya what a beautiful name what does it mean?”
“It means beautiful”
“Oh, its lovely and it totally fits” just than two identical little girls come running up arguing when Mary holds her hand up and the girls stop talking straight away, I've seen it with people training dogs but not kids. I just stare at the two girls when Mary starts talking
“Girls can you see I'm speaking to someone”
both say in unison “yes”
“And what aren’t, you suppose to do when I'm speaking and you rudely interrupt”
“We have to use manners and say excuse me” they both say in unison again it’s a little unnerving
“Now girls introduce yourselves to Niya please”
“Hi Niya my names Sarah” the little girl on the right says “and I'm Clara” the little girl on the left says
“And your” there mother says to both girls
“Where sorry for interrupting” they say in unison again and I smile
“Hello Sarah and Clara its lovely to meet you” I say sticking out my hand to shake both of their hands
“I'm sorry Niya I better go, moving days fun” she says smiling with a thumb up “I'll see you around maybe get you to babysit for me one night”
“I'd like that” I tell her surprised she’d even consider asking me, I watch as she walks in the house with the both girls in toe talking a hundred miles an hour.
**
It didn't take long for Mary to ask me to babysit for her in fact it was the weekend after they had moved in that I first babysat. When Mary had found out that I was home schooled she asked me if I could watch the two younger twins she had Miles and Macy during the day while her and her husband John where at work. I jumped at the chance to make money because up until than I had no funds to help me escape my father. It was the second weekend of watching the twins when it was there fifth birthday, the house was in chaos with about twenty kids running around screaming, Mary had a themed party, princesses for the girls and cowboys for the boys, she’d gotten a bouncy castle and a mini petting zoo, cupcakes, sweets games every child’s dream birthday at that age she'd decorated the yard with streams and balloons and lights everywhere the kids where having a ball John falling over when he was pretend shot.
“I swear he keeps knocking me up just so he can have a kid’s party” she'd only recently found out she was pregnant again and was praying to god that it wasn't twins again
“I thinks he's having more fun than the twins” I tell her as Jon runs past the window with a bunch of screaming kids following him, she looks through the window laughing
“He always does” she says smiling, Clara and Sarah come running into the house again in identical everything
“Hay Niya” they both say
“Hay girls love the costumes”
“Why thank you” they both said in unison, I swear they weren't only twins they were eerily the one person always saying the same thing at the same time, In the couple of times I'd babysat them they were always together and always spoke the same words at the same time
“Clara go and give this to your father please” Mary hands Clara a bag of balloons and a pump, I have no idea how she tells them apart but she always does
“Mom can Arial stay over tonight” Sarah asks, it’s a bit weird hearing her speak without her sister
“Sarah, I have twenty other kids here today, please tell her she can sleep over next weekend” Sarah stomps her foot and walks out
“Hay Mary”
“Um Hum”
“How do you tell the twins apart” she smiles
“It's easy, Sarah always stands to the left of Clara and Sarah is left handed and parts her hair to the left”
“Really that's how you tell them apart”
“Yep watch” she yells Sarah and the twin on the left turns around
“Wow I never even noticed, how did you figure that out”
“When I was pregnant the doctors revealed that the babies where identical calling them mirror twins”
“Mirror twins what's that”
“It means that they are a complete mirror image of one another, even their organs are on opposite sides of their bodies”
“Oh my god that's freaky” she laughs
“Yeah it can be a bit unnerving seeing that they both speak at the same time and say the same thing but you get used to it, I just pray there's only one in here” she rubs her belly smiling.
*
Later that night when I got home the lights where all off in the house so I figured dad was asleep, he still hadn't said much over the past couple of days. Something I never minded we never really spoke to one another much anyway. I walk through the door as quietly as possible just in case he was asleep, the second I close the door my face explodes in pain as a vicious right hook hits me right above my eye. I land on the ground hard and it takes me a second to relies what’s going on when I look up at my father standing over me, my head thumping he grabs me by the hair and starts to slapping me and punching me.
“Stop” I yell “please what have I done?”
“Where the fuck, have you been bitch?” he hits me again
“I was at the twins fifth birthday party, I told you yesterday” I can feel my hair being ripped out by the roots
“Did I fuckin' say you could go... well did I” he pulls my hair more
“I'm sorry” I say trying to cover my face and body just waiting for the next blow, he stares at me his eyes full of rage and his hot rancid breath blowing in my face
“You know what, I should just fuckin' kill you and save myself the bother of looking after you” I'm looking at him and I just lose it, a surge of anger rips through me as I push him as hard as I can and he falls back and I stand up as best as I can
“LOOKING AFTER ME, YOU DO NOTHING BUT TREAT ME LIKE SHIT, I'M NOTHING BUT A FUCKING SLAVE AND PUNCHING BAG TO YOU. SOMETHING TO USE WHEN YOUR STUPID ASS GETS IN TROUBLE” I yell and he stands up so fast grabs me by my hair again and drags me across the floor to my room, I try and get away but he pulls my hair harder
“You fuckin' ungrateful cunt I've feed you clothe you put a roof over your head since your cunt of a mother tried to leave me and for what, to have you speak to me like that” he drags me into my room pushing me to the ground and starts to kick me over and over in the ribs the air in my lungs explode out of m
y body and I try to cover my body but he just keeps kicking me all over.
Chapter Four
Tobias
We'd been prospecting for almost a year and a half when the club vibe started gettin' real serious. Scythe and Cookie had been on a run over to Nevada when Scythe was pulled over. The cops had found a small cache of guns on him, so he was done for unregistered firearms sendin' him away for four years, Cookie was pissed because he was with him but Scythe took the fall. The club where still doin' small runs, but after Scythe got sent away Razor put a hold on all runs. Razor was talkin' to the Oregon Chapter to see if they wanted the runs, Preacher the club President of course was in money was money and if Razor didn’t want it Preacher was quite happy to take the business. Standin' behind the bar at the clubhouse Beau and I watch as shit hit the fan, a rival club the Dragon Kings had ambushed Cuff and Socket on the way to the new Tattoo shop the club had just opened, they’d gotten away and hauled ass all the way back to the clubhouse with four of the Kings on their asses. Bullets came flyin' through the walls as I hit the deck, the club-whores screamin' as windows exploded the bottles above me smashin’, men yellin' than silence. I look up covered in glass and liquor (what the fuck) I listen for any noise before I stand up but only hear women crying