A Proposal for the Officer

by Christy Jeffries

  “You know they have a baby registry, right?”

  Molly jumped at the sound of Freckles’s voice behind her. The waitress from the Cowgirl Up Café was standing alongside another woman who looked very familiar, although Molly couldn’t quite place her.

  “Can we borrow that list?” Kaleb asked Freckles’s conservative counterpart, who was wearing a pantsuit with tasteful jewelry and a hairstyle so stiff and formal not a single strand of the bob would dare to fall out of place.

  The older woman passed over some printed pages and told them, “But I already called dibs on getting Maxine the jogging stroller.”

  Molly leaned into Kaleb’s arm to read the list, but Freckles and her friend were openly staring at them and smiling in a weird, expectant way. Whether they were trying to confirm that Molly and Kaleb were actually dating or whether they were just curious about what she planned to buy her sister, Molly squirmed under their blatant scrutiny.

  “Look.” She pointed at the list. “Here’s something in the electronics department. Let’s go take a look at that.”

  Molly had no idea what the item was, but at least it allowed them to make a quick escape to a different part of the store. Kaleb easily tossed the mattress that she hadn’t decided on onto the top of the shopping cart and made their goodbyes.

  It was then that Molly realized her mistake. The baby monitor had been easy enough to find, but Kaleb had to talk to every store employee and his assistant, Angela, before settling on a newer, more expensive model that would link to a special app on the user’s phone.

  Then the young man who worked in the video game department recognized Kaleb and asked for a photo. It was another hour before they were finally pushing two full shopping carts into the parking lot.

  This was supposed to have been a quick and easy errand. But she was finding out that nothing about Kaleb Chatterson was easy at all.

  Chapter Eleven

  After arguing with Molly for a solid ten minutes about physics and mechanical engineering, Kaleb went back inside to buy a coil of rope so that all their purchases wouldn’t fly out the back of the truck.

  “I still think all of this is overkill,” Molly told him when he secured the last knot.

  “I like being prepared.”

  “You probably were an excellent Boy Scout.”

  “I would have been if...” He trailed off at the memory.

  “If what?”

  “I wasn’t allowed to go to the scouting camp like my brothers. I spent a whole summer in a traction bed once reading the handbook, though, and learning how to pitch a tent, start a fire and tie ropes. I never got around to doing the first two, but I’d used up a couple of spools of dental floss practicing the more complicated knots. Anyway, I quit going to the den meetings because I didn’t see the point in hanging out with a bunch of kids learning how to do things I could research and learn about at home.”

  “I’m surprised your parents just let you quit.”

  “I think they were initially overwhelmed with having a kid who wasn’t perfect. I don’t mean that they didn’t love me,” he rushed to say when he saw her horrified expression. “In fact, they probably loved me too much because they treated me with kid gloves. Even my brothers took a hiatus from picking on me. But don’t worry, they bounced back after my first surgery when the doctor told them that I actually needed to exercise in order to get better. Of course, I still wasn’t allowed to do the contact sports, but my dad found a swim coach and I had daily strengthening workouts. By the end of middle school, I could easily outdistance any of my hotshot baseball-playing brothers in the pool.”

  She smiled at him before getting into the passenger seat. “Being a kid sister, I’m pretty impressed that you were able to beat them at something.”

  He walked around to his side of the truck and climbed in. “Ha. Apparently, you’ve never raced against a Chatterson. They’re horrible at losing. Kane and Kevin started going to practice with me during their off-season so they could challenge me to a rematch.”

  “Yeah, I caught a glimpse of your family’s competitiveness when they were playing badminton at the barbecue on Wednesday.” Molly smiled as he started the engine. “Yesterday, Kylie was still sporting that bruise from that shuttlecock Bobby Junior served during the last match.”

  “Trust me, they’ve really mellowed out since we were teenagers.”

  “So did they ever beat you at swimming?”

  “Kevin did once, but only because he reached over into my lane and grabbed hold of the waistband of my Speedo.”

  “That’s horrible,” Molly said, but the words were muffled by her giggles.

  “You have no idea. The girls’ water polo team was meeting for tryouts and were all on deck and watching.”

  Molly’s nose was practically touching her knees, she was bent over laughing so hard. When she’d wiped the tears from her upturned cheeks, she asked, “Did he get in trouble?”

  “Yeah, he got grounded for two weeks. One week for cheating and one week for embarrassing me. Although, he had an out-of-state baseball tournament during the second half of his punishment and I decided that justice wasn’t exactly being fulfilled.”

  “You mean you took matters into your own hands?”

  Kaleb shrugged his shoulders. “I might’ve hacked into his computer account and printed out some of his correspondence to a certain high school junior who he had this huge crush on.”

  “Were the emails pretty scandalous?”

  “Unfortunately, no. They’d mostly been sharing pictures of cute kittens and discussing civics homework. But it taught him that I would always be one step ahead of him when it came to technology. Anyway, I’m starving. How’re your levels? Should we go grab a bite to eat?”

  Kaleb silently cursed himself when the smile suddenly left her face. He hated that he’d gone and ruined their playful banter with that reminder, but someone had to look out for her health. Molly hadn’t had a meal since she’d only managed to swallow down a few bites of the well-done frittata he’d made. Not that he could blame her. The online video didn’t say anything about baking times being converted for the high altitude.

  Without replying, she pulled the black case out of her purse and pricked herself. He put the truck in gear to avoid staring at her, knowing how it felt to be the subject of strict medical scrutiny. Yet he couldn’t stop himself from holding his breath until she told him the number.

  “Kane told me about a restaurant near this shopping center. It’s called the Bacon Palace. Does that sound good?”

  “It does, but—” she looked out the back window “—I don’t think we should leave all this stuff in the bed of the truck. Someone could steal it.”

  “Right.” Personally, Kaleb didn’t see what anyone would want with a bunch of random baby gear, but he’d hate to have to go back to the store and find all those items again. He pulled into another parking spot and tapped on his cell phone screen.

  “What are you doing now?”

  “I’m searching for nearby drive-through restaurants.”

  “Or you could just lift your head and look at the big signs on the side of the road. We passed at least several of them on the way here.”

  “Yeah, but I have this app that shows the menu and the guest ratings so we don’t waste our time going to somewhere that isn’t good.”

  “Kaleb, it’s fast food. I think you’re going to need to lower your billionaire expectations for at least one meal.”

  Billionaire expectations? What was that supposed to mean? First, his sister made fun of his cheap shirts and now Molly was making fun of his financial situation. Someone needed to pick a lane. “Do I come across as some sort of snob to you?”

  “Not a snob exactly. But sometimes you can get a little controlling about how you want things done. Don’t you ever just live in the moment? Do something without a plan or
a map or a phone call to your assistant?”

  “Fine,” he said, rolling his stiff shoulders backward in an effort to loosen them. “Let’s just fly by the seats of our pants and go to the first place we see.”

  “This is killing you, isn’t it?” Molly smiled at him as he pulled out of the parking lot. The dare in her eyes was the only thing that kept his fingers away from the navigation screen.

  “Nope. I’m great. Call out a restaurant as soon as you see it.”

  “There’s a place called Burger X-Press,” she suggested.

  “I don’t trust businesses that can’t spell out their full name.”

  “Across the street is Big Smokey’s Pit House.”

  “It looks closed,” he said, ignoring the fact that the lights were on, a cloud of barbecue smoke was billowing from the roof and the parking lot was packed.

  “Krispy Kreme.” She pointed to the giant doughnut-shaped entrance sign. “That counts as a drive-through.”

  “You wish,” he said.

  She nodded at a take-out building shaped to look like a giant taco. “How about Señor Shaddy’s Taco Shack?”

  “That shack looks like one of those places where people used to drop off their pictures to get developed.”

  They continued another block before she asked, “Fantastic Falafels? Or do you have something against alliteration?”

  “I’m good with that.” He made a casual shrug and flipped on the turn signal. What he didn’t say was that before she’d shamed him into closing out his phone app, this restaurant was the first one to pop up and he’d already seen its four-and-a-half-star rating.

  There was also an outdoor take-out window and picnic tables with orange-striped umbrellas, so they could still keep an eye on the truck in the parking lot as they ate. He bit his tongue when she ordered the falafel platter with a regular pita, instead of the whole-wheat option. And she didn’t make fun of him when he asked the virtual assistant feature on his watch how to pronounce gyro.

  It was almost rush hour and she asked if she could drive the truck back to Sugar Falls because it had been a while since she’d been behind an engine with more than four cylinders. But the memory of Molly racing around on the Jet Ski still had Kaleb’s muscles clenching, so he told her she could be in charge of the radio instead.

  They were halfway up the mountain when he lowered the volume and asked if they could listen to something with a little less bass. “It makes me feel like I’m at a dance club in Vegas.”

  “Do you go to a lot of dance clubs?” she asked.

  “Never.”

  “Why am I not surprised?” Molly’s smile was teasing, but all day long he’d had a weird feeling that he was the butt of some sort of joke nobody was telling him about. Maybe it was all the teasing he’d been taking from his siblings recently. Or maybe it was that soldier’s comment about his juvenile shirt at the rec lounge at Shadowview. Or maybe it was the fact that he’d never slept with a woman and then spent the entire day with her afterward. All he knew was that he hadn’t been this insecure since high school.

  He pulled into his sister’s driveway and the first thing he noticed was the lack of cars parked in front, although the lights were on inside. His chest expanded and he let out a relieved breath. Hopefully, most of his family would be gone and they’d be able to drop off the baby presents and escape another evening filled with smart-aleck Chattersons.

  No such luck, he realized when he swung open the front door and saw the chaos bouncing around the great room. One of Kylie’s twin daughters was lying in her playpen chewing on the corner of a Dr. Seuss book, the other was sliding halfway out of her swing. Aiden and Caden Gregson were in the kitchen, stirring something in a big pot over a lit stove while a boy Kaleb had never seen before sat on the counter beside them giving them instructions. Two of Bobby Junior’s kids were jumping on the huge sectional sofa, which was suspiciously missing all of its cushions.

  A major-league baseball game played on the big-screen TV, the volume turned way up, but there was no other sign that another adult was present. Kaleb grabbed his cell phone, prepared to call 9-1-1.

  “What’s going on, guys?” Molly hollered over the noise.

  “We’re making chili goulash,” the nine-year-old twins in the kitchen called out in unison.

  “We’re practicing gymnastics.” One of the redheaded girls used the arm of the couch to do a backflip onto the wooden floor.

  The baby in the playpen blew a slobbery raspberry.

  Molly jogged over to rescue the other baby, whose diapered rear end was now dangling out of the swing.

  “Who’s supposed to be in charge?” Kaleb finally asked, now that it seemed like everyone was accounted for.

  “Uncle Kevin is,” the extra boy sitting on the counter said. Was his family suddenly multiplying and nobody had told him?

  “I’m down here.” His brother waved from underneath the poorly constructed blanket fort on the living room floor. “Trying to watch the game in peace.”

  “Kaleb,” Molly said as she looked around, holding a baby on her hip. “I think one of the kids is missing.”

  Kaleb did a quick headcount as Kevin climbed out from his hiding spot. “Who’s missing?”

  His brother pointed around the room as he called, “One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Nope, everyone’s here.”

  “Um, Kevin.” Kaleb nodded toward the dark-haired boy. “That’s not Bobby Three.”

  “I’m Choogie Nguyen.” The kid waved a box of macaroni at him before dumping it into the pot on the stove. “I live next door.”

  “Okay, back to my original question.” Kaleb turned toward his brother, who was now sitting on the cushionless sofa muttering something at the umpire on the TV. “Who is supposed to be in charge?”

  Kevin glanced around the room, then shrugged. “I am.”

  That couldn’t be right. Nobody would put Kevin in charge of a load of laundry, let alone seven children. Aiden—or was it Caden?—stepped off his chair in front of the stove.

  “Well, our parents went out for a date night so Aunt Kylie told them to drop us off over here. Then she and Gramma Lacey had to go to the party-supply store because Grampa Coach bought bridal shower decorations instead of baby shower decorations. One of Uncle Drew’s patients called him with an emergency, so he had to leave. And Uncle Bobby is in the back bedroom talking to his wife on the phone.” The kid glanced at the two girls doing cartwheels way too close to the coffee table and lowered his voice to a whisper. “Aunt Kylie said she thinks they’re gonna get a D-I-V-O-R-S-E, but we’re not allowed to say that word in front of his kids.”

  Molly carried the baby she was holding over to the playpen and set her down inside before taking away her twin sister’s chewed book. God bless the woman for not running out the front door.

  “So where’s Dad and Bobby Three?” Kaleb asked his brother as he began tossing cushions back onto the sofa. It wasn’t his fault that Kevin wasn’t quick enough to dodge the one flung at his face.

  “Oomf.” Kevin hurled it back at him. “Dad took him to pick up some ice cream. You want me to call them and tell them to bring extra for you and your girlfriend?”

  Kaleb felt a flush spread up his neck at his brother’s purposeful use of the term. But Molly hadn’t heard him or else was doing a really good job of pretending she hadn’t.

  “No. We’re just dropping off the stuff for the baby shower.” He walked over to Molly and whispered, “Do you mind if we hang out for a few minutes until a responsible adult comes back? I’m afraid someone might call child services on us if we leave them alone with Kevin.”

  She chuckled and it caused the warmth to spread from his neck to the rest of his body. “I don’t have anywhere else I need to be.”

  “Is it true that you’re Uncle Kaleb’s girlfriend?” Caden, or possibly Aiden, tugged on Molly’s hand
.

  Now her cheeks were the ones turning crimson. “Um...”

  She looked at him with pleading eyes but before Kaleb could answer, Kevin muttered, “Not if she’s smart, she’s not.”

  “But you have to be smart to be a combat pilot, right?” Caden asked.

  “Well, I did have to go to college and I like to think I’m pretty smart.” Molly smiled through her confusion.

  “Are you as smart as Uncle Kaleb? Aunt Kylie calls him a Brainiac,” the other twin said as he walked over.

  “Why does she call him a Brainiac?” Choogie, the neighbor kid, asked as he joined them in the living room.

  “Because Uncle Kaleb is a computer genius and a gazillionaire and invented ‘Blockcraft.’”

  “I’m not allowed to play video games,” Choogie announced. “Both of my moms say that junk will rot my brain.”

  And the ball of insecurity in Kaleb’s stomach grew, making him blurt out, “Actually, there are no scientific studies that back that up.”

  He knew that not everybody was sold on the successful educational game he’d developed as a counterpart to the more recreational Alien Pirates series. But this was twice in the same day that someone had referred to his creations as mind-rotting junk. Of course, maybe his brain was rotting if he was standing here defending his life’s work to a nine-year-old.

  “So then if you’re smart—” Caden continued his conversation with Molly “—does that mean that you’re not Uncle Kaleb’s girlfriend?”

  “It’s, um, complicated,” Molly said before brightening up.

  “Do you have another boyfriend?” Aiden asked. “Uncle Bobby told Gramma that his marriage was complicated and Aunt Kylie said that’s because his wife has another boyfriend and wants a D-I-V—”

  “No,” Molly interjected quickly when she saw one of Bobby Junior’s daughters somersaulting toward her. “I don’t have another boyfriend.”

  “Have you ever had one before?” Choogie asked.

  “Wow.” Molly’s smile was frozen as she widened her eyes at Kaleb. “Your family sure asks a lot of questions.”