The Portrait

by Joan Wolf

  Leo said, “See if you can stop that fool boy, Isabel.”

  I slid my right calf behind the stirrup leather and Alonzo picked up a canter. By now David was out of sight around a turn in the road and I asked Alonzo for an extended canter. His long strides ate up the ground. We made the turn and I saw David ahead of me. His pony was still galloping. I wasn’t sure which one of the pair ahead of me was in control, David or the pony, so I asked Alonzo for more speed. When we were close enough, I called, “David, slow that pony down!”

  No answer and the pony continued to gallop. Alonzo and I overtook them, and I yelled that I was going to pass. We went by and I planted Alonzo’s magnificently muscled rear in front of the pony and began to slow down. We moved from gallop to canter to trot to walk to a halt and I turned to look at David. He looked a little defiant.

  “Are you all right, David?”

  “Yes, Cousin Isabel.” His voice was steady.

  At this point Leo came riding up to us. “What were you thinking?” he said to his nephew. “And don’t try to make me think that pony ran away with you. You’re too good a rider to let that happen. You deliberately asked him to gallop.”

  “He wanted to gallop, Uncle Leo! He was bored. We were going too slow.”

  “I don’t think it was Gawain that was bored, David.”

  No answer from David.

  Leo said, “Before you took off did you think what would happen if Patches had followed you? He was right behind you on the path.”

  “Patches would never have left the rest of the horses.”

  “You don’t know that. Charlie would have been terrified if his pony had started to gallop. You know how nervous he is since he took that nasty fall.”

  David hung his head and said, “I’m sorry, Uncle Leo. I didn’t think of that.”

  “You are the oldest, David. You must always look after your brother.”

  “I know. I will. I promise, Uncle Leo. I would never want Charlie to be hurt.”

  By this time Robert and Charlie had caught up with us and Robert repeated much of what Leo had said. David apologized to Charlie and we continued our ride.

  I thought Leo had handled the situation very well. He hadn’t yelled at David or threatened to take away his pony, but he had made his point. Leo would make a very good father I thought and glanced at him out of the side of my eye.

  *

  After breakfast, my mother, Elisabeth and I decided to take a walk through the garden. The clouds had disappeared from the sky and the day was warm enough to wear a light dress. We spoke in French and Elisabeth and I told Mother some hair-raising stories of things that had gone wrong at the circus. Mother laughed until tears came to her eyes, and she kept saying how much she would have liked to be brought up in a circus.

  When we reached home we met Leo in the front hall. He was dressed for driving. He gave us a distracted smile and said he was going to London for a few days. Some business had come up he had to attend to.

  I tried not to show my dismay. He had virtually kidnapped me, and now he was deserting me? “How long is ‘a few days’?” I asked. I heard my voice wobble and cleared my throat.

  “I’ll be back before Aunt Jane arrives with Susan.” He smiled at Mother. “You’ll be glad to see your sister, Aunt Maria.”

  Mother smiled back. “Yes, I will be. And John will be here at the end of the week as well.”

  John was Mother’s husband, Sir John Hepburn, who lived in Scotland. When Mother wrote to him and said she wanted to spend a few more weeks at Camden Hall, he had replied that he would like to join us. Leo, of course, had immediately invited him.

  Leo left, Mother and Elisabeth decided to take tea in my sitting room, and I decided I would go back to the stable and work with Gypsy.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Roger was down at the stable when I arrived. He smirked when he saw me and gave me that look—the one where he seemed to be undressing me with his eyes. I had once caught him trying to back Mary Ann against the wall to kiss her and I had warned him if I found out he was bothering the maids I would tell Leo. He had given me an unpleasant smile and that look but he went away. I told Mary Ann to come to me if she had any more trouble with him.

  She gave me a grateful smile. “He’s always been a nuisance, but he’s getting worse. He caught Nancy dusting in the library the other day and scared her to death. She’s new, a country lass, and she doesn’t know how to handle a lad like Mr. Lavery.”

  “She should put her knee in his groin,” I said bluntly. It was what Papa had told me to do in such a situation. I had never had occasion to use the maneuver, but I always remembered his advice.

  Mary Ann’s eyes opened wide and she stared at me in amazement. “That’s what I told her,” she said.

  I nodded. “Good. And I meant what I said. Lord Camden would put a stop to Roger’s activities if he knew.”

  Mary Ann gave me a grateful smile and we parted ways.

  I was the second person to arrive in the drawing room before dinner that evening. The first person was Roger. I almost didn’t go into the room when I saw him, but I was determined I wouldn’t let him dictate my actions.

  He didn’t hear me at first. The rug was so thick that steps were muffled, and he was standing looking into the fireplace. I said, “Good evening, Roger,” and he turned to look at me.

  “Ah, it’s the Circus Girl,” he said. He gave me a nasty smile. “If you’re looking for Leo he’s not here. He’s gone to London to visit his mistress.”

  I looked at him in bewilderment. “What?”

  “Oh, no one has told you I see. I suppose they thought it wasn’t fit for your supposedly virgin ears.” He looked at me pityingly. “Leo keeps a little pied a terre in London where he has installed an actress named Helen Archer, whom he visits regularly to relieve his…er…manly needs. She’s a beauty and she must know how to satisfy him because he’s kept her for almost four years now.”

  My mouth dropped open. My heart was hammering, and a flush of blood had risen to my face. I didn’t know what to say.

  A pleased expression crossed Roger’s foxlike face. “Sorry to spoil your plans to catch him as a husband, Isabel, but he has settled into permanent mourning for his lost wife. Robert is his heir and after Robert there is David. Leo apparently feels no need to produce a son of his own.”

  At this point Margaret came into the room, followed by Robert. Robert took one look at my face and said to Roger, “I hope you haven’t been bothering Isabel. Leo told you he wouldn’t stand for any nonsense from you.”

  This time it was Roger who flushed. “We’ve just been chatting.” He looked at me. “Haven’t we, Isabel?”

  There was no way I was going to tell Robert what Roger had just said. It might not even be true. I forced a smile and agreed. My mother and Aunt Augusta came in and we all went in to dinner.

  That night, alone in my bed, I thought about Roger’s words. I was not an insipid little English girl. I knew that men had needs. The women who lived with the men in our circus were not always their wives. But Leo….

  I was stunned. I was hurt. I felt betrayed. He was not the man I had thought him to be.

  I told myself it was stupid of me to feel this way. I had no claim on Leo. I did not want to have a claim on Leo. I was looking forward to the end of my six months captivity so I could say goodbye to him and return to France and Papa.

  I punched my pillow the way I would like to punch Roger’s face. He was trying to poison my friendship with Leo, and I wouldn’t let him do that. Leo and the horses were what kept me sane in this house. And my mother, of course. I focused my mind on my mother. Her husband was coming to stay with us for a few weeks, invited by Leo.

  I had come to realize that Leo loved having his family around him. He was a man who should have many children. It was really idiotic of him to refuse to wed again…he must have loved his wife very much.

  I jerked my thoughts away from Leo and concentrated on the other two family membe
rs who would be coming to Camden Hall shortly: Aunt Jane and my cousin Susan. Aunt Augusta had made plans for Susan and I to attend some local dances. I hadn’t argued; I liked to dance and had thoroughly enjoyed the village dances back home. And Leo had promised he would teach me the English dances I would be likely to encounter.

  I was back to Leo and once more I punched my pillow.

  *

  Two days later Susan and Aunt Jane descended on us with a carriage full of baggage. Aunt Jane was the youngest of Leo’s aunts. She was a pretty woman with the family’s signature blonde hair and blue eyes. Susan resembled her mother, and when we were introduced she gave me a happy smile and said, “I am so pleased to meet you, Isabel. Thank you for inviting me.”

  Leo had invited her, not me, but I simply smiled and said, “I’m happy you’re here.”

  Aunt Augusta explained about Leo’s absence and assured Aunt Jane he would be home the following day.

  I felt a flare of happiness at this news, which was really a flare of relief that life would go on normally. Everyone—the servants as well as the family—had felt the absence of the master of the house. There was something about that tall golden presence that was immensely reassuring; one felt all was right with the world when Leo was near.

  Susan and I decided to go for a walk in the garden before dinner so we could get better acquainted. Susan began the conversation as soon as we were out of earshot of the house by demanding, “Tell me about Leo!”

  I had not expected this. “What do you want me to tell you?” I asked cautiously.

  “Everything!” she said dramatically

  I certainly wasn’t going to tell her that he was in London visiting his mistress, so I didn’t say anything.

  “Start with how he found you,” Susan suggested.

  I was certain she must have heard the story from her mother, but I obliged, using a carefully neutral voice. I finished my tale by saying, “The facts made it impossible to deny that I was the missing child.”

  “It’s like a novel,” Susan breathed. We had reached one of the stone benches that were scattered along the garden walks and she took my arm. “Let’s sit down.”

  I almost shook her off, but then gave in and joined her. A large planting of magnificent white flowers, whose names I did not know, stood on the opposite side of the walk. I stared at the beautiful blooms and said flatly, “It’s not a novel; it’s my life. I was perfectly happy as I was. I wish to God Leo had never seen me.”

  There was a small silence, then Susan reached over and put her soft smooth hand over mine. “I’m sorry I said that, Isabel. I’ve been so taken by the romance of your story that I never thought you might look at it differently.”

  There was genuine sympathy in her blue eyes and my heart softened. I said, “I promised Leo I would stay for six months, and I will honor that promise. But when the six months are up, I am going back to France and the circus and my papa. In the meanwhile, if Leo and Aunt Augusta want me to go to some dances and meet ‘the right people’ I will do it. But when my time is up, I’m going home.”

  Susan sighed. “It must be nice to have control of your own destiny. English girls must do as their parents wish.” She looked at me with big eyes. “It must be great fun to belong to a circus.”

  “It is.”

  “Tell me about it.”

  The more stories I recounted, the bigger Susan’s eyes got. “You are so lucky!” she said when I finally ended. “You must introduce me to Alonzo. And I want to see you ride!”

  Susan certainly didn’t seem as stiff and formal as I thought she would be. We continued our walk around the garden and she told me about herself. “I was supposed to have my Season last year, but my uncle died and we went into mourning. Mama said she wants me to go to some dances in the country before we go to London. That’s supposedly her reason for coming to Camden.”

  “Supposedly?” I raised my eyebrows.

  Susan glanced around, but there was no one within miles of us. She lowered her voice anyway. “Mama really wants to check on Leo.”

  “Check on Leo?” I was becoming an echo, but Susan was being decidedly enigmatic.

  Susan stopped walking. I stopped as well. She took a step closer to me and said, “What do you think of him, Isabel?”

  “What do I think of Leo?”

  “Yes. Of Leo.”

  “Except for making me come here, he’s been nice to me.” I couldn’t think of anything else to say.

  “Leo is always nice,” Susan said. Clearly she had not been satisfied with my answer. “My mother calls him the ‘golden boy.’ Everyone loves Leo. He could probably be Prime Minister if he wanted.”

  I made a noise of encouragement for her to go on.

  Susan obliged. “To be fair, he did have a great tragedy happen to him. Have you heard about his wife and baby?”

  Suddenly I felt uncomfortable. “I’ve heard,” I said crisply.

  “Mama and all the aunts think he is shirking his duty by not marrying. I think it’s romantic, the way he clings to the memory of his first wife. They should leave him alone.”

  “I imagine he doesn’t pay any attention to them.”

  Susan grinned. “I see you have got to know Leo. Mama complains about him all the time. She says it’s his duty to pass on his bloodline, that he is selfish not to marry again.”

  “It’s not as if he has no heir,” I said. “Robert would inherit if Leo died, would he not?”

  “Yes, he would. And Robert would make a good earl. He knows Camden Hall as well as Leo. And he has sons. But here’s the rub. Robert isn’t Leo. He will never be Leo.” She inhaled deeply. “There is just something about Leo—and it’s not only how he looks. When you’re in his company you feel it…” Her voice trailed off and she shrugged. “It’s hard to describe.”

  I understood what she was saying but I wasn’t going to admit it.

  “One can’t help but love him,” Susan went on. “Everyone in the family does. He’s so kind. He’s let Aunt Augusta live here forever even though she’s unbearable, and he let Aunt Maria stay at the hall until she married again. He’s taken in a whole series of cousins who needed help. Look at that swine Roger, living off Leo because he has gambled away all his money. He’s also paying for Robert’s boys to go to Eton.”

  “He’s a good aristocrat,” I said. “I don’t usually approve of aristocrats. I think they should be done away with and their money given to the poor. But if England must have aristocrats, I will admit that Leo is a good one.”

  Susan stopped walking. “Do you mean that? About aristocrats?” she asked.

  I stopped as well. “I do. The aristocrats in France lost their heads because of their greed. They took everything and ignored those who had nothing. They got what they deserved.”

  Susan was looking stunned. “Have you told this to Leo?”

  “I have.”

  Susan wet her lips with her tongue. “Leo is a Whig. They are the progressive party here in England, but I don’t think they’re as progressive as you are.”

  “I doubt they want to do away with themselves,” I agreed. I glanced at the sky and said, “We need to change for dinner, Susan. It’s getting late.”

  The two of us walked back to the house in mutually reflective silence.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Margaret and I were both late to breakfast the following morning and we found ourselves in the awkward position of being the only two people in the dining room. This had never happened before, and I found myself hoping this might be a chance for us to become friendlier.

  Margaret filled her plate and I made a point of sitting directly across from her at the table. She glanced up from her eggs and a faint line appeared between her perfect brows when her eyes met mine. I have found that sometimes it is best to be blunt and so I asked, “Why do you dislike me, Margaret?”

  The line between her brows deepened. “Why should you think I dislike you?”

  “You avoid speaking to me. Actually y
ou avoid me altogether. Have I said or done anything to offend you? Please let me know if that is the case and I will apologize.”

  “You’re being ridiculous.” She put down her fork, took a sip of tea and regarded me over the rim of the cup. It was her usual hard green stare.

  “You don’t give that look to anyone else in the house,” I said mildly, and took a sip of coffee.

  “I don’t dislike you, Isabel,” she said stiffly.

  “But….?”

  She gave an annoyed shrug. “If you insist on having an answer, perhaps I resent you a little. Which is unfair, I admit, and I’m sorry I was so obvious”

  “Resent me? But what have I done?”

  “You haven’t done anything.” She shrugged again, still annoyed. “It’s just that I can’t help but compare the way you were welcomed into this family and the way I was welcomed.”

  She took another sip of tea. I nodded encouragement for her to continue.

  She sighed. “Robert’s family didn’t want him to marry me. My father is the pastor of St. Michael Church in Lynnbury, a village near Lambourn. His father was the pastor there, as was his grandfather. My birth is decent enough.” Her lips thinned and a bleak expression passed over her face. “However, my family has no money, and all of Robert’s family wanted him to marry a girl with money. But Robert loved me and I loved him and Leo supported us.”

  I gathered from the way she said the last name that Leo’s support had been the deciding factor in their courtship.

  Margaret was going on, “So we married and came to live at Camden Hall. Robert has been Leo’s steward ever since Leo came into the earldom and Leo wanted us to live at Camden. Robert wanted to keep living at Camden. Since I had no alternative to offer, we came to live at Camden. Leo gave us a big suite of rooms for our private use, and when the children were born we had the use of the nursery.”