Bad Reputation

by Stefanie London

  “Then I’ll move on and find another idea.” He shrugged. “I guess we’ll find out if I’m a one almost-hit wonder.”

  “You’re not,” she said softly.

  “If you walk away, I’ll understand.” All the things he wanted to say were swirling in his head, butting up against one another in the fight to leave his lips first. “But you have the choice. I shouldn’t have lied to you, and…God, I was so frightened that you’d cut and run.”

  “Were you going to fire me that night?” she asked.

  “I thought about it.” He cleared his throat, the shame at his moment of weakness filtering through him. “But the second you opened the door and I saw that perfect smile…I knew I couldn’t do it.”

  “Why?” Her eyes were guarded, but she didn’t look away. “Because you wanted what was best for the show?”

  “I wasn’t thinking about the show or about your career or mine. The second I came into your apartment it was…us. No work, no politics. It was purely selfish, because I want to keep you around. And I knew that Lilah finding out about us was everything you’d been afraid would happen.”

  “It was.” She shook her head. “A person can forgive themselves once for making such a critical mistake, but twice? There’s no excuse.”

  “Maybe there’s one excuse,” he said.

  The feeling had been growing in him with terrifying urgency. The feeling that was a whole lot more than like, that was a whole lot riskier and more foreign. He and Remi fit together; they worked well. They sparked off one another. She’d trusted him to help her face her fears, and he’d trusted her to give it her all without holding back. As two individuals, they were talented. But together…together, they were beyond anything he could have imagined.

  “I don’t think anything justifies making the same mistake twice.”

  “What if I told you I lied when I said I like you?” he said.

  Her blond brows shot up. “That’s a hell of a way to win me over.”

  “What if ‘like’ was the word that felt safe, but it didn’t quite capture what I was feeling?” He had not planned on doing this today, so the words came out clumsy and uncoordinated. Stumbling. Like a baby llama on pointe shoes. “I don’t know what comes next because love seems crazy. We’ve known each other less than a month, but I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I felt something the first time I saw you. I knew you had something rare.”

  Her eyes widened. “What are you trying to say?”

  “That I am handing you everything. The fate of Out of Bounds is yours.” His chest felt like it had been run through with electricity, the sizzle of every frantic beat in his ears. “I know you were devastated by what happened last time—that you were abandoned, that you were kicked out. But this time it’s different. You’re in control.”

  “But that show is everything to you,” she said. “Why wouldn’t you find someone else?”

  “There is no one else, Remi. You’re it.” He swallowed. “For the show…and for me.”

  * * *

  Remi wondered if she’d imagined it all. If she might suddenly be jolted out of this hazy dream and find herself staring at the ceiling above her bed. But the sincerity in Wes’s face wasn’t something she could dream, because she wasn’t sure she’d ever seen him display that mix of raw honesty and vulnerability before. Usually he covered things with a charming smile, with a quip or a wink. But now there was no creasing around his stunning blue eyes nor the beginnings of a smirk twitching on his lips, nothing that meant to soften the impact of his words.

  “Are you saying…you love me?” She blinked. This wasn’t something she could easily process, because it was never supposed to happen. After she’d left Australia, love wasn’t something she’d planned to seek out. At least, not for a very long time.

  “I don’t know how to say it. Love is for people who know each other inside and out. And I feel like I’m only scratching the surface with you.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “But I want to know everything about you. I want to learn all the things you like and what you dislike. I want to help you achieve your dreams, and I want to be the person who’s there every day telling you how talented you are until you finally start to see it for yourself.”

  Remi covered her mouth with her hand, trying hard to keep the soft, little sob inside. She’d never dared hope that Wes might be falling for her the way she was for him. Last time, she’d convinced herself that she was loved back when she wasn’t. And she’d been terrified of stumbling down that path again.

  “Tell me I’m not out on my own here,” he said, a nervous laugh cutting through the words. “I’m not imagining that this was more than sex, right?”

  She shook her head. But her lips were frozen in shock, her tongue lay heavy in her mouth while her mind whirred, scrambling to catch up. Could she believe it?

  “You know how to make a guy crazy,” he said, placing his hands on her shoulders and giving her a playful shake. “Talk to me. Because I’m feeling like a real idiot now spilling all this out.”

  “I more than like you too.” The words came out in a rush as she curled her hands over his. “And I think you do know me, because everything you said now shows me that.”

  “I want to know more.” He lowered his forehead to hers, and the sweetness of it all was so right, so perfectly right, that Remi finally allowed herself to relax. “I want to know every detail so minute that you’ll go crazy telling me.”

  She laughed. “That’s going to take a long time.”

  The charming grin was back, but this time it wasn’t a cover. It was real. “I see you’ve discovered my plan.”

  “Clever. I’ll need to keep an eye on you.”

  “Please do.” His expression sobered. “But I’m serious when I say that I shouldn’t have lied. Remi, I’m sorry. I was so angry that I’d risked everything like that, angry at myself for pushing you to go against your rule.”

  “I wanted it,” she admitted. “I was scared, sure, but I caved because I wanted it. Not because you pushed me. You’re hard to resist, you know.”

  “So you’re not going to resist me now?”

  A smile curved on her lips. “Not on your life.”

  With the show out of the way and Wes coming clean, she could make her decision from a place of clarity rather than fear. Knowing that he was willing to sacrifice his dream production to be with her…well, it told her everything she needed to know. He wasn’t going to abandon her; he wasn’t going to put selfishness first.

  All the feelings and desires she’d pent up were running riot in her veins, that wonderful, fizzy excitement making her feel like she was about to levitate. Dance brought her joy and fulfillment, and she had Wes to thank for bringing her back to it. For pushing her boundaries and forcing her to be truthful with herself.

  “I’m done resisting,” she said.

  “Good. But this time I have a rule.” He brushed his thumb over the corner of her lips, parting her mouth in a way that made the blood thrum harder in her veins. And like that, their sweet moment turned sexy. “No more secrets. Between us or about us.”

  No more secrets…only, she did have one. Annie. Bad Bachelors. Saying yes to Wes now while withholding that piece of information would make her behavior no better than what he’d done. She had no idea where she stood with Annie, no idea if there was even a friendship to salvage.

  But all she did know was that she wanted to be with Wes. Without guilt or secrets lurking in the corners of her mind.

  “No more secrets.” She sucked in a breath. “I know who runs Bad Bachelors.”

  Wes blinked. “What?”

  “It’s my friend Annie.” She spilled the entire story from how she’d used it when her friend Darcy first decided to get back into the dating scene, to how Darcy’s fiancé, Reed, had found out Annie’s identity and they’d all kept it a secret from her.

&nbs
p; “So that’s what he meant,” Wes said. “The cost that was too great.”

  “It was Darcy.” She sighed. “He didn’t want to come between her and Annie. They’ve been friends since they were kids.”

  “And you trust me with that information?” He looked shocked.

  “I don’t want there to be anything between us. You know all my secrets now, all my truths.” She bit her lip. “I promised Annie that I wouldn’t tell, but I can’t have a skeleton in the closet that might come to hurt us later. I begged her to do something, to take your reviews down.”

  “For the show?”

  “And for you.” She wrapped her arms around herself. “I couldn’t stand the thought of you suffering for it. But she wouldn’t listen. I don’t want her to get hurt and I think she might if people know, but I can’t start something with you if it’s not a clean start.”

  “People will always talk. If it’s not that site, it’ll be another. At least now we’re giving them something positive to say.”

  “You want to tell people about us?”

  “Remi, I want to tell the world. I want to shout it so loud that I lose my voice over it. Everyone is going to know what a lucky son of a bitch I am.”

  “And the show?”

  “Like I said, it’s yours. If you want to bring it back, we’ll do it.” He brushed his lips over hers. More the promise of a kiss than a kiss itself. “If you want to move on and talk to my mother about getting her to help you find a role somewhere else…”

  Her heart and her mind were so full the answer wasn’t far from her lips at all. “If I’m going back into this world, I’m doing it with you, Wes. Not anyone else.”

  “She could get you a place in any dance company,” Wes said. His eyes were bright with hope—hope that she would say the right thing, hope that their bond was stronger than either of their desires for their careers.

  And it was.

  “I choose you, Wes. Before anything else, I choose you.”

  Epilogue

  Two months later…

  “Wes is easily the most creative, inspiring person I’ve ever met. He’s fiercely independent while also being inclusive and generous. He’s attentive and kind and well-rounded. And yes, his reputation in bed precedes him for good reason. But the man is more than the sum of his parts, no matter how good those parts are.”

  —RemiDrysdale

  Sneaking out of the dressing room right before the show was about to start was a bold move. Usually, prior to a performance, Remi would have her headphones on, the show’s music playing as she mapped the moves out in her mind, her body going into an almost meditative state to quell the nerves. Especially on opening night.

  She peered around the corner of the door that led out from the dancer’s hallway and into the foyer, her gaze scanning the room. Since her hair and makeup were already done, the ability to blend into the crowd of buzzing theater goers had vanished. But this was too important a thing to miss.

  “Remi!” Chantel came over and spoke in a stage whisper, her eyes narrowed. “What the hell are you doing out here?”

  “You look beautiful.” Frankie gazed up at her with wide-open eyes.

  “Thank you, sweetheart.” Remi bent down to give the little girl a hug before popping back up. “Have you got the flyers?”

  Chantel nodded. “Enough for every seat in the house.”

  The pink sheets of paper had the Out of Bounds logo along with a message urging theatergoers to flood the Bad Bachelors site with reviews for the show, rather than for Wes. In the last two months, Remi and Wes had worked hard to clear the gossip surrounding him and Out of Bounds. He’d appeared on morning talk shows, promoting their work and dodging questions about the reviews and media frenzy over his sex life.

  He and Remi appeared in public together, talking openly about their relationship and about them working together. Pointe Magazine had even contacted her to do a feature on her return to the ballet world, which was another dream come true.

  But the Bad Bachelor reviews remained. Remi and Annie’s friendship was on shaky ground. However, Annie had insisted not only on coming to opening night, but also buying tickets for her whole team in a gesture of support. They would work things out eventually. But for now, Remi had another idea for how to quash the salacious reviews.

  “How are you going to hand them out without him seeing?” Remi asked.

  “Don’t worry about it. I’ve got it covered.” Chantel winked. “Besides, he’s not going to be coming out to the audience until the last minute. It’ll already be done by then.”

  Remi nodded. “Okay. I’ll see you after the show.”

  She ducked back through the door and headed down to the dressing rooms in time to find Wes giving the cast a pep talk. He shot her a relieved look when she walked through the door and shed the long, black cloak that’d covered her costume. Everything was ready to go. Her costume fit like a glove and the floaty, black skirt swished around her legs like a gauzy cloud. She’d been over the moves in her head a thousand times.

  “This is our chance to make a splash,” Wes said to the group. “I believe in you all and I believe in this show. Our investors do too, so let’s show them their faith in us was worth the wait. More importantly, let’s show the audience what the dance industry has been missing!”

  There was a cheer from the group, followed by nervous chatter as everyone shed their outer layers and ran through the final preparations. Since there was no curtain on the stage and all the chairs were lined up with audience members seated, the show started in the wings.

  Those who were onstage—and had paid for the privilege—looked left and right, trying to figure out what was going to happen. A grin split Remi’s face wide open when her dad turned toward the wings and looked straight at her. Next to him, Opal’s hair glowed like a frizzy halo under the stage lights. When they’d agreed to come and watch her—on her assurance she’d give them an experience like nothing they’d ever had before—she’d never felt more loved and accepted by them.

  Tonight, both she and Wes had supporters in the audience. Chantel, Mike, and the girls would be in the front row along with Wes’s parents. Darcy, Reed, and Annie were here too. Even Mish had come, saying she wouldn’t miss it for the world. And Bert Soole, their angel, was there with his wife.

  Boom! The first, bass-rattling beat hit and Out of Bounds burst to life in a riot of dancers rushing the stage and audience in dizzying color. All except for Remi, who was the only one in black.

  The music filled the theater, audience members turning their heads to and fro, unsure where to look. The opening was designed to confuse. To excite.

  When Remi strode back to the chair next to her father, she smiled for a second before stepping up onto the chair. Swish, swish, kick. Her foot sailed past his face, and he could no doubt feel the air rushing between her satin pointe shoe and his nose. Swish, swish, kick. She turned, rose into arabesque and held herself steady and confident. Strong. Her dad looked up at her, awestruck.

  Power washed over her, like a drug filtering through her system. She commanded this audience. Held them captive. They were hers.

  And she did it all for Wes.

  * * *

  “Wes Evans is a true artistic genius.”

  “Broadway hasn’t seen talent like Wes Evans for a long time. Out of Bounds is an exercise in restrained shock, in perfect execution of an idea that takes the traditional and rips it to shreds.”

  “Out of Bounds isn’t a show. It’s an experience.”

  Wes gaped openmouthed at his laptop. The sight of his Bad Bachelors profile flooded with reviews for Out of Bounds was not what he’d expected when Chantel had texted him that morning, telling him to go online. The entire first page of reviews had nothing to do with his body or his sex life or his reputation. It was only about his show. His creation.

  WES: How did
this happen?

  CHANTEL: Ask your girlfriend.

  He looked over to where Remi slept beside him, a content smile on her lips. Her hair was a tangled heap of golden strands, like a fuzzy lion’s mane. The woman slept like she was dead, tipping over into slumber with ease and staying there as long as possible. He brushed her cheeks with his knuckles and she didn’t even stir.

  Opening night had exhausted them both. Not enough that they hadn’t fallen into bed with mouths pressed together and limbs entwined, but it was quick and furious. Not the usual slow exploration he preferred. But he’d make it up to her later.

  They had a grueling schedule ahead. Two shows today and for the next few days, with a couple of evening-only days after that. It would take a toll on her body—giving her aches and fatigue. But he would be there every step of the way, cheering until his throat gave out.

  Last night, she had been a vision. More beautiful and powerful than he’d ever seen her before.

  “You’re staring at me,” she said sleepily, cracking one eye open. “I can feel it.”

  “Good morning.” He leaned down and kissed the tip of her nose.

  She rolled toward him and eyed the laptop. “Read anything interesting?”

  “Only a flood of reviews on Bad Bachelors.”

  “What do they say? Wes Evans has a massive cock?” She laughed when he rolled his eyes. “What? You do.”

  He chuckled. “You know very well what they say.”

  She snuggled against him, resting her head on his chest and pressing a hand to his stomach. “I couldn’t think of any other way to help.”

  “Baby, you help by dancing your heart out. You were incredible last night.” He leaned down to kiss her, coaxing her lips open and sliding his tongue against hers. “My star.”

  “I love you,” she whispered, her eyes shining.

  They hadn’t said it before, but the words sent a wave of comfort through him. Hearing her say those words felt so right. As right as watching Remi on his stage, and as right as waking up with her in his arms. Their lives were inexorably linked. Their dreams forever entwined. And there was no more fear about the reason Remi was here with him. She had offers flooding in from the show’s preview. Interview requests and audition invitations clogged her inbox daily. Before the show launched he’d asked if she might leave Out of Bounds. But what he was really asking was if she’d leave him. Remi had simply frowned and shook her head. Never, she’d said. They were a team. A partnership. And that meant more to her than any possible job offer. Their relationship was number one, and everything else had to get in line.